also i love how throughout the entire episode every time michonne mentions going home rick like nearly begs michonne to just stay out a little longer, just a couple more days and michonne seems slightly confused on why he seems to be dragging his feet so much on getting back to alexandria.
but it’s because rick has already thought about and processed the reality of what they’re going to do, and the possibility and implications that come with it. he knows that people are going to die, that he could die or he could lose michonne and he’s already forced himself to accept this because he knows that what they’re doing is bigger than them, and they have to keep going and see it through.
and he knows that they have the people now, and all they need to really start this is the guns. and once they have the guns, he knows that this trip is it. that as soon as they drive through the gates of alexandria, this little bubble of peace and happiness and laughter bursts and they have to go forward with this plan which could easily result in both of their deaths, so he’s trying to hold onto it, to her, for just a little longer, for as long as he possibly can.
but michonne hasn’t processed this and doesn’t even consciously realize it until she thinks rick is dead. and when rick talks to her in the van, the weight of it finally hits her. that this is it before they put everything they have and everything they are on the line.
and i think rick, the whole time, realizes that she hasn’t thought of this yet, but he doesn’t tell her because he just wants he to be able to be happy without exception for just a little longer.
andy keeps calling it their honeymoon, but i think it’s even more than that in a way. this is the first significant amount of time they’ve been alone together since they’ve been together (maybe the first time in the entire series????? idk don’t quote me on that). this is their time to be them and be happy with each other and enjoy each other and love each other. it’s the first time, and it may be the only time.
and they can’t change that. it has to be that way.
but it’s so amazing and they’re so happy and in love and rick’s so happy and in love, and he doesn’t want it to end. he’s trying to hold onto it for as long as possible.