Cancer has terror moments that come close to that precipice—waiting for results, for example. But it has been bearable because I don’t feel alone. I have this amazing support system—from my parents and siblings to distant relatives to old friends to my top-notch doctors and nurses. In fact, I kind of feel like the whole world has my back.
That is depression’s most effective weapon: convincing you that you are alone. Even as the logical part of you tries to fight back and say, no, Mom calls you every morning. Dad traveled 500 miles to help you make a poster and a plan to get all your work done. Beth came all that way to buy you fish oil and wait for you to speak through your tears. Liz sends you adorable texts every day. Grandma sent you a birthday card. Sarah asked you to stay for the weekend. Bettina wants to know if you can babysit. Dr. Lamothe is helping you break down your thesis into manageable pieces. Dr. Eppes gave you an extension on that math assignment. Dr. Warren extended your conducting final for Christ’s sake. And Mrs. Roberts hasn’t kicked you out of studio even though you’ve been late to lessons more often than you’ve been on time.
How those millions of things everyone did for me could feel like the lie, I don’t know. But if it made sense, it wouldn’t be mental illness. Depression does not give two shits for reason or logic. Depression just lies.
CREATER-SWAP AU where Rebecca Sugar creates Gravity Falls based on her brother and her, while Alex Hirsch creates Ariel Universe inspired by her twin Ariel
show being made in their style like “sad and deep plot with really nice music” version of GF and “traumatic demons that haunts your dreams with secrets hidden all over” in Ariel Universe
“Luke! Luke! Come here!” With a towel tightly secured around his waist, his wet hair leaving droplets on the floor and a panicked expression on his face, Luke runs into my bedroom. “Finally!” I yell, clinging onto his body, not caring if my clothes get wet. “It only took me a second to get here…” He mumbles confused. He runs a hand through his blonde locks and furrows his eyebrows. “So um, what is the emergency?” He chuckles as he wraps an arm around my waist, looking around my room with curiosity.
“Well, there! Don’t you see? It’s huge!” He opens his mouth but closes it right after. He tries to walk closer to the wall but I keep him from it. “It’s dange-” “Baby, do you want me to catch it or not?” “Yes but-” “No buts. Now, if you wait here for a second, I’ll catch it, okay?” “Okay.” His arm slowly leaves my waist and he walks closer to the wall. “Where is it? I can’t se- oh no wait, is this it?” My eyes widen as he puts it on his hand and walks over to my balcony. “Yes! Duh!” “I see, yeah, it’s huge. It would have bitten you for sure, I mean, I totally wouldn’t have needed a magnifying glass just to catch a glimpse of it…” “Luke, just get rid of it!” With a soft chuckle, he puts the spider on the leaf of the palm tree that’s the same height as my balcony.
“Voila!” He turns around, a warm, proud smile lighting up his face. “Happy?” “Yes. Thank you!” I peck his lips and his arms quickly snake around my waist. “So, I was in the middle of a very pleasant shower… Wanna join?” He slowly pulls me to the bathroom, not waiting for my reply. I raise my eyebrows, trying to hold back a giggle as he closes the bathroom door behind us.