Whooooo lord my insomnia kept me up all night again so I took my vyvanse at 7 am but then briefly fell asleep for an hour….If you’ve ever fallen asleep not on your ADHD medications and woken up on them it’s less like the usual “ah yes I am gradually becoming awake and focused” and more like ur body suddenly being like “@brain ARISE MY BOI THE SUN STILL BURNS IN YONDER SKY & THEREFORE WE HAVE MUCH TO BE NERVOUS™ ABOUT”
I stumbled across one of those slime videos with loud audio, it was someone screeching really loudly and I actually broke down crying because I was so startled and scared. I don't know why people are doing this, but it's far from okay!
It is far from okay! If you stumble across another let me know where it is cause when I do I block the person and warn others.
Cursed Child was dumb and here are some reasons why
(warning: spoilers. this probably won’t make sense unless you’ve read the script. far be it from me to recommend this kneazle-vomit of a play, though, so if you haven’t read it, good)
the plot is messy, strange, and childish. there’s only one time-turner left!! how will the characters cope when said time-turner is lost? oh lol they’ll just use this other convenient time-turner. for convenient plot points, see also: harry can suddenly speak parseltongue again, because well he just kind of needs to be able to do that
Harry cursing “oh dumbledore” without a hint of irony. like really? really
the characterisation was a pile of dragon dung and we all freaking know it. let’s break it down into individual characters here because fuck if I can stop at one bullet point for this
Hermione: the brightest witch of her age, the constant crusader for the unloved and the unrepresented, whose successful career and capacity for kindness apparently rest in the hands of her romance with Ron Weasley. oh… but wait. it sounds a little familiar, this story. hear me out. let’s see now, a highly intelligent person who falls in love but doesn’t have that love reciprocated, and who then becomes a really fucking mean teacher at Hogwarts through bitterness. sound like anyone we know? fam, they tried to parallel Hermione and Snape. Hermione and Snape. this being the same Snape who sneered in Hermione’s face when she’d been visibly hexed, and made her cry; the same Snape who bullied Neville Longbottom for years, while Hermione muttered instructions under her breath to help him. if you want to tell me that Hermione would ever allow herself to become a Snape parallel then I will kindly invite you to shove a dirigible plum where there’s no lumos solem
Harry: when Harry was at his angriest in OOTP, and he’s yelling at Ron and Hermione, there’s one thing we notice. everything he yells is true. he means it. he’s bitter about it and he’s loud and furious, but he doesn’t have the kind of anger that just says anything to cause hurt, that speaks without thinking, not even at this crisis point in his life. are you really going to tell me that the boy who knows down to his bones what it’s like to feel rejected, and misunderstood, and alone, would ever say - even in anger - that he wishes Albus wasn’t his son? I am going to snap wands over this
Cedric. and this one burns. because Cedric was brave and he was true, and he had a sense of justice that led him to telling Harry about the way the golden egg worked, and led him to sharing the winning of the triwizard tournament with Harry. he died, he was murdered at the age of seventeen, embodying a sense of justice so strong, an innocence, a goodness. Cedric Diggory - the boy who believed in fairness with an integrity that is astounding - becoming party to the indiscriminate killing and casual torture of the Death Eaters just because he had his head engorged one time… is about as likely as Hagrid stomping on a dragon egg. it’s an insult to who he was and I am going to engorge the entire bodies of the writers of this fucking play so that hopefully they’ll just float away too, with all the grace and likeability of Aunt Marge
Voldemort: can we all agree now that Voldemort would not father a child. the idea of him experiencing lust seems out of character; the idea of him giving into a base urge seems more so. it’s too human, too vulgar, too physical; it would associate him with the common and the mainstream in a way that I contend he would find repulsive. Tom Riddle Sr. was trapped by Merope into sex and romance; to have sex would be to bring himself closer to his parents, down to the level of a Muggle and a witch who lacked power and craved love, two things Voldemort could never, ever stand. no. he wouldn’t have sex just because he wanted to; he’d be repelled by the idea. what other reason could there be for him to do the nasty with Bellatrix? to ensure the continuation of his line? that makes even less sense. achieving immortality for Voldemort was always a question of magic, a personal quest. he wouldn’t go for a messy, physical back-up plan. he always thought that he would win. if anything, he would see a child as a future threat, not a security. another being in the world with the promise of his power? he wouldn’t risk it.
what the fuck was that trolley witch scene though
“for voldemort and valour” are you serious. is there a Gryffindor spy in the Voldemort camp laughing their ass off because they actually managed to get that one through. and are they ten years old
overall, the message of the play infuriated me. Delphi was the child of Voldemort, so she was evil. Albus was the child of Harry, so he was good. Scorpius was the son of Draco, so he should have been evil, but Draco’s actually kind of good now and his mother was nice, so he can be good too. where is the complexity? was five hours of drama not enough to find some shades of morality? where is the hope, where is the resonance, in a story that says that good begets good and evil begets evil, and nothing can really change? the Harry Potter book series was about a boy who grew up with something inside him that was utterly evil, and who rejected it, fought against it, changed the path that fate seemed to wish him to walk. not slytherin, not slytherin. we had Regulus Black and Sirius Black, who rejected their pasts, whose heritage and whose House stood for nothing against their principles, their eventual and separate forms of bravery. we had Remus Lupin, who transformed into a monster but never became one, not even after years of rejection and pain. we had the word mudblood, and we watched Hermione fight it, we knew it was ridiculous to label someone based on their blood. and now… we have the Cursed Child. a playwhich is flat, and stupid, and tells us that your parentage inevitably dictates your character - and that how you’re treated is how you’ll treat others. dear writers, in the words of Albus Dumbledore, you fail to recognise that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be. you fucks.
In Blow Us All Away, Philip says, “The duel will commence after we count to ten.” which emphasis on after. This, in my opinion, is because he gets shot on the count of seven, rather than ten, and it is a type of foreshadowing.
high school teachers act like college professors are gonna be all serious and tough but one time my history professor showed up to class 10 minutes late on a rainy day looking 500% done and he just stopped in the middle of the room and sighed really loudly and was like
“guys, you know, I had to stop by my car on the way here to get something and I realized….I realized I could literally just get in my car and drive away. I could drive all the way home and sit on my couch and drink a beer. But I came here for you guys. FOR YOU. I love you guys, and when I go home I’m drinking a beer then taking a nap, and then maybe I’ll grade your papers”
and another time in the same class the classroom technology wasn’t working (it rarely ever did) and he was like “well, looks like I’m just going to have to go outside and set this ipad on fire and while I’m at it might as well set myself on fire too”
And one time we spent a whole class talking about those creepy clowns in the news and he somehow managed to connect it to the societal hierarchy of colonial america
The book says Tom enjoys vigorous exercise (exorcize lol) but imagine if Marco sees him sparing and fighting one day. And Tom gets embarrassed because he assumes Marco will think fighting for sport is violent and be put off by it.
But Marco gets so excited and says “I do that too! I’ve been taking karate for ages!”
And they both get so excited to have something in common. And at every fight the other is there cheering them on.
I talked a little bit about this over on my twitter but I want to talk more about Jean Jacques Leroy, or JJ from Yuri on Ice!!!
He’s a fantastic athlete, driven and ambitious, but egotistical to the point of fragility.
JJ is an asshole, yes, but I also feel like he’s putting on a show at all times.
Look at how quickly the YOI meta machine found out and disseminated the information about how gay skaters are actually treated (versus those who are not out, it’s widely available, google it I’m sleepy). Given what we know about how gay skaters irl have to be Very Careful not to be openly gay in public, and how obviously critical the show has been of opposite-sex relationships (Georgi and Michele both have really… warped views of relationships and reality), JJ is likely no different and his relationship with his girlfriend will also end. So…
…is it possible that JJ is a sleeper for real skaters? That he is performing heteronormativity the same way that he performs on the ice, and does so in order to avoid criticism of his flamboyant nature from a very conservative skating community?
If so, the way he judges and treats women like objects isn’t misogyny alone, it’s the use of women as shields from judgment. “Look at me, I’m getting married too” isn’t a grab for attention from the gays and their marriage. It’s a bid for the heterosexual charade he’s poured himself into, the parts of himself he has ignored or outright denied to make his position at the top of the podium unassailable.
Once I had a substitute teacher- yes, TEACHER- who was a member of the Flat Earth Society and spent all of form time afterwards arguing with my form teacher about it. Someone yelled “What about the pictures from space?” And the sub looked them dead in the eyes and said “Faked”. Someone else was like “what about the moon tho” and he said really loudly “The moon is an illUUUUSIOON!!” so everyone was kinda going “what the f*ck”… I told my friends who aren’t in my class about it later and a couple of them were like “yeah we had him for science last week” like wtf who lets someone who thinks the Earth is flat and DOESN’T BELIEVE IN THE MOON TEACH SCIENCE TO FOURTEEN YR OLDS WHYYYY
Okay, so I’m, like, really suuuuuuper late to the party but I finally got to see “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” (Ultimate Edition) tonight and something that honestly surprised me was how well I thought Ben Affleck handled playing Bruce/Batman.
He definitely had the bulk and size the part called for…
…but I wasn’t expecting him to hit all of the right emotions.
And, yeah, then there was this, too. I’m shallow, what can I say? ;)
I knew I’d love Henry Cavill because, well, I already love his Clark/Superman…
…but Ben surprised me by holding his own. Which was a hard sell because, like, 97% of the movie is him trying to KILL my beloved Clark/Supes, so I was fully prepared to curl my lip at him through most of the movie. ;) The fact that I could still feel for him, even at the times when I was thinking, “Bruce, c’mon, man! Don’t be a jerk!” definitely says a lot!