668. A really really really really really lost pizza guy shows up at Hogwarts and the Hufflepuffs get at him before anyone else does and so a prefect enters the common room to find pizza everywhere and a man whom they have never seen before being taught about nargles.
624. the infamous really-lost-pizza-delivery-guy once delivered a pizza to the home of paul and sally blofis. he took one look at the teenager at the door, dropped the pizza, and ran. when sally asked what all the commotion was about, percy said, “he let us have it on the house,” and left it at that.
770. the really lost pizza guy was so freaked out by the incident at camp half-blood that he decided to move in with his girlfriend, who was studying near san francisco. he got a job at a pizzeria there, and a week later was asked to leave thirty-five cheese pizzas near a maintenance tunnel.
723. after his encounter at camp half blood, the really lost pizza delivery guy decided to pack up and move across the country to california, in order to get away from all the weirdness in new york. oddly enough, he got sidetracked again on one of his deliveries. his co-workers now call him crazy for blabbing about unicorns, a giant elephant, and a scary blonde kid asking him for stuffed animals.
742. the first thing the really lost pizza guy did when he saw mythological creatures running along the beach was faint. later, he could have sworn he heard a blonde girl comment, “he drools in his sleep like you do, seaweed brain.”
903. though he knew he always had to be on time, the second time a certain pizza delivery guy got lost was the only time he didn’t mind being late. he came across a camp of very young preteen girls who all held him at arrow-point, but artemis told them to hold fire. the pizza delivery guy was actually orion reincarnated.
868. one day, a pizza delivery man appeared on the beach at camp half blood, completely lost and stumbling around like a moron. he thought the place seemed familiar, because this was in fact the second time he had gotten lost here. he spotted an attractive, italian boy dressed in all black near the camp’s outskirts, and decided to ask him about the camp. they ended up splitting the pizza before he left, and the boy even gave nico his number before he left, which nico found insanely creepy, but hilarious.
726. when the really lost pizza delivery guy came to camp, chiron came to the borders to see what was going on. the delivery guy could see through the mist and when he saw chiron, he dropped all of the other pizzas he was supposed to deliver that day. let’s just say that at dinner, camp half-blood had a little pizza party.
716. ever since he first stepped foot on camp half blood, pizza delivery guy, whose name is david, would drive to the hill and spend hours searching for it. he didn’t care how much the fees were, he wanted to join a camp that let him use real swords.
743. really lost pizza delivery guy worked at a domino’s not far from the long island sound–worked being the operative word, as he was fired for his talk of swords and goat-people. however, he was taken in by the owner of the original ray’s pizza, a descendant of ray himself and thereby a legacy of apollo.