Golly they animated my favorite chapter in the manga, now it’s in the anime and its better than I could have ever hoped for. I’m ready to gush about Shigeru and Touko Fujiwara now and I’m so excited to do this because they are the absolute best most wonderful people in the world and I’m so glad that Natsume is with them. This isn’t really a post that has any actual meaning to it, either. No speculations or theories, just me gushing about how much I love Shigeru and Touko and how wonderful they are. Spoilers, and a ton of really sappy praise ahead.
Firstly I want to talk about them as a couple, pre-Natsume. They are older, and have lived in the house that Shigeru, and presumably his parents, grew up in, for a very long time. What I adore about them is how much they love each other. They are so close and kind to one another. They tease each other a little bit, as you can see through the series, but past that they’re happy and content and comfortable with one another. And oh gosh they went on that date and it was so cute because Touko wanted to go to the aquarium and Shigeru agreed and it was so perfect and lovely and they were so happy.
Now, as individuals. Shigeru is so kind and gentle. He’s a reserved man, probably doesn’t talk a ton regularly, and I am positive that his best friend is Touko, but he’s so wonderful. He doesn’t make fun of Touko for wanting to go to the aquarium, and they have a lovely time together. He’s so stable and kind and gentle. And when he goes to the funeral, he overhears these adults talking about how they don’t want to take this kid in and how they just want to pass him to someone else, and his first reaction is something that looked a lot like disgust? Honestly, same Shigeru. BUT then he sees this sad kid just sitting alone and dirty and I assume he thinks “How can I help this child be happy and safe?” So his first reaction is to just go home and think about whether or not he and Touko could maybe take the kid into their house. Like he starts cleaning that room, he gets lost in thought. He’s probably thinking “Yeah this could work. Yeah. He could stay here if he wants to. That would be good!”. And he is so understanding of Natsume’s situation too. He hears all this stuff about Natsume being a trouble child, and rather than forget and avoid this little child he’s like “Well then I’m just gonna offer approval, love, gentleness, and genuine affection and let this child relax in this safe and calm environment.”
And Touko, she is an absolute angel. This is the type of woman who is so genuinely sweet and kind. She called to that crow in the middle of the street without caring about what anyone thought of her. She made friends with this crow and was so happy every time she saw it and I’m so happy that it made her happy. And she loves Shigeru so much, and their relationship isn’t strained or stressful because they don’t have children. And nobody ever says anything about them not having kids as a bad thing! She does seem to want children, but she’s never bitter or sad about it, and isn’t mean to any children because of it. She’s so wonderful. One of the biggest scenes I love though is
THIS SCENE. Where Natsume mentions a white crow that she can’t see. Her reaction is surprised at first, but then it doesn’t turn into her saying “Where?” or “What are you talking about?” She realizes that Natsume can see something she can’t here and her reaction is
SHE’S GLAD. She is so wonderful and lovely. She is a beautiful woman who loves this child so much and loves her husband so much and they are the ideal couple. (Also its so cute because when she goes on the trip, she turns to the crow and leaves him in charge of taking care of the house while she’s gone so Honestly? Same, Touko. Same.)
Now to talk about these two as a couple WITH Natsume because that is one of the most precious things ever. Firstly, I think it’s important to know that Shigeru and Touko have only ever been told that Natsume is a troubled child, but they want to take him in anyways. They clean out that room, they buy him furniture. And they don’t even jump to this conclusion right away either. Shigeru thinks long and hard before he even brings it up with Touko, and when she says yes, they spend even more time making sure Natsume is going to have a comfortable place to live. THEN on top of all of this, they fight tooth and nail with his other family to let him come stay with them. They even ask him if he wants to live with them, giving him a choice that no other relatives have ever given him before. On top of that, they don’t force him to become part of their family either. They are so patient with him, and don’t make him into a replacement for their own non-existent children. They understand that they aren’t taking this kid in because they want a child to be happy, or because they are being selfish. They’re only thinking of Natsume and how to make his life better. They aren’t completing their family with Natsume, just giving him the option to join it if he wants to. It’s so refreshing and wonderful.
Also, quick side note. I love how quiet and shy Natsume sounds in this episode before he opens up to them a bit more. Like, usually Natsume talks pretty normal around Shigeru and Touko in most episodes. He’s not afraid to be a bit loud, or excited. But before he opens up to them, he’s very quiet and shy, probably trying his best not to upset him in any way so that they don’t start treating him badly because of it. I fully expect that Natsume had been through quite a few familys where he was treated fine at first, until he began acting out slightly. Then, as soon as his behavior was “bad”, the family members started acting colder or harsher to him so the poor baby expected Shigeru and Touko to do the same BUT THEY DIDN’T!!!
Like, one of my favorite parts of the series is how Touko and Shigeru react to Natsume when he’s in the hospital after he fell off that cliff. The rest of his family is really bitter towards him, saying that he jumped off the cliff so he could hurt them. But Shigeru and Touko? They are so kind and gentle to him. Like, this is a kid who is at risk for growing out of his family. If Shigeru and Touko hadn’t come along, I fully expect Natsume would have been cut out of the family at 18 or whatever age is considered the minimum for adulthood in Japan. He would be forced to get a job, or pay back his relatives in some way for them taking care of him for so long, or just cut out of their lives and forgotten, told as a horror story to make sure their kids value and treasure their parents more. Like, if it wasn’t for Touko and Shigeru, Natsume probably would have ended up hurt worse than he was when he fell of the cliff, or homeless at 18, or worse yet, going with that Yokai who wanted him as a pet. But what do Shigeru and Touko do?
They ask him so calmly if he wants to go live with them where it’s quiet and peaceful, and they are so ready to take him in because they don’t see a troublemaker or freaky kid, they see a lonely, sad boy who hasn’t got the attention and care he needs.
They decide that they are able and willing to give him that attention and I love it so much.
Similar to the other one you did: Alex being out of town and Maggie having a breakdown/wanting to slip back into bad tendencies & Kara being the one to help
When she’s with Alex, the world doesn’t sting quite so much.
When she’s with Alex, she doesn’t dwell – not as much – on
the massacre of her friends at the bar, doesn’t stay up late at night going
through their pictures, going through their files, because she has enough
saturation during her days, filled with finding their families, their friends,
and telling them, telling them, telling them.
When she’s with Alex, she feels proud of M’gann for going
back to Mars to campaign against genocidal racism, not sad and miserable and
mildly but guiltily betrayed because one of her only real friends is suddenly
on a different planet.
When she’s with Alex, she doesn’t down quite so much
bourbon, because she doesn’t think quite so much about the deaths on the job
and the torture she’s cleaned up after and the persistent nagging feeling that
she’s not doing enough, never doing enough, to make the police force a force
for actual good.
When she’s with Alex, she gets called things like the
best, and tough, and genius, and sexy, and you stay
in bed and I’ll make the coffee today, babe, you’re always so good to me, I
want to start taking care of you; she doesn’t have so much time or
bandwidth to reflect on past heartbreak, on the terror that this will end the
same way, on the way she tends to lose all her friends in breakups, the way she
tends to lose all her self-esteem in the palms of women who don’t understand
who she is.
But Alex is away in Geneva, and Alex skypes every night, but
briefly, briefly, and Alex looks so damn good in a pantsuit and Maggie can’t
help but be scared, be terrified, that she’ll meet someone else, that she’ll
meet someone new, someone better, someone with a better pedigree, some
white chick who has six degrees and isn’t just some local cop and whose only
baggage is a six-figure salary and a history of absolutely no mental health
So Maggie is downing as much bourbon as that new white boy
will serve her – and he’s not M’gann, he probably doesn’t deserve to be
mentioned in the same thought bubble as her, so he doesn’t cut her off, he
doesn’t slide her a glass of water, he doesn’t put his hand on her shoulder, on
her cheek, and remind her that she’s got a lot to be proud of. He just serves
up more alcohol, and she just keeps drinking it, and the world starts splitting
in two but he doesn’t stop serving so she doesn’t stop drinking.
And suddenly there are a pair of strong hands on her
shoulders, and she thinks of Alex, just for a moment, but it’s the other
Danvers sister, the little one, the one Alex idolizes and the one who idolizes
Alex, and Maggie feels a lopsided grin twist onto her face and hears the slight
slur in her words.
“Ey, it’s Little Danvers! How you doing, kid?”
Kara arches a sympathetic eyebrow and keeps one hand on
Maggie’s back as she lowers herself onto the stool next to her.
“How are you doing, Maggie?” She puts the seltzer Mon
El silently gives her into Maggie’s hands, and she makes a note to firmly
explain to him the finer points of keeping his customers safe later.
“You know your
sister looks really incredible in a suit. I met her in a suit, you know. On
that tarmac, when she was pretending to be FBI, and damn I knew I was a goner
then and there.”
Maggie sips for a long, long moment at Kara’s seltzer and
stares into her blue eyes for a long moment. “You’re really pretty too, you
know, Little Danvers. Both the Danvers girls, huh? Bet someone in Geneva’s
gonna try to pick her up, ya think? And of course she’ll leave me, because come
on, who wouldn’t, and I mean, I told her, I knew, right, she only wants me
because she’s just coming out and I’m all bright and shiny on account of her
just realizing her feelings, right, I mean, who wouldn’t leave me, right
Kara listens with soft eyes and puts the straw up to Maggie’s
lips, encouraging her to drink more seltzer. Maggie obeys, and Kara reaches a
tentative hand out to brush Maggie’s hair away from her face, just like she
does for Alex. For her first big sister.
“Alex loves you, Maggie. And not just because she’s just
coming out. You know that, right? That she loves you?”
Maggie shakes her head and tries to order another shot, and
Kara cancels it and gets another seltzer instead.
“But she’s amazing, Little Danvers. Kara. Does it
bother you that I call you Little Danvers? Because obviously you’re not littler than me, but because Alex, you, it.. anyway… I just… she thinks she fails at
everything, all the time, you know, but she’s just… she’s perfect, Kara,
perfect for me, and I’ve never… I’ve never had anyone treat me like she
treats me, like I’m… like I’m worth a damn, you know, Little Danvers?”
Kara nods softly. “And you’re afraid of that being taken
away? Because she looks good in a pantsuit and there are probably hot women in
Maggie laughs bitterly. “Well when you put it that way I
sound like a whiny, insecure kid.”
Kara smiles and shakes her head. “No. Not to me. You know
what you sound like to me? You sound like someone who dotes on my sister, when
my sister has never, ever been paid proper attention to, let alone been doted
on, in her whole life. You sound like someone who loves with her whole heart,
her whole being, and who’s only gotten punished for it. But Maggie, I know
Alex. Alex isn’t… Alex isn’t going to do that to you. Alex loves you, Maggie.
For you. Because that thing you said, about her thinking she fails all the time,
but really she’s perfect for you? That’s how she feels about you, Maggie.
That’s how she feels about you.”
Maggie stares at Kara for a long time, and Kara returns her
gaze gently, gently, affectionately. Because she misses Alex, too, and she’s
been jealous of Maggie – so jealous – but Maggie has the same fear of losing
Alex that she does, and the love that underlies that fear just might be the
thing to keep them all together.
“Come on,” Kara concludes abruptly, putting her arm around
Maggie’s waist and guiding her to stand.
“Whoa, I know I said you’re pretty, Little Danvers, but I’m
not trying to – ”
Kara laughs at Maggie’s drunken ridiculousness gently. “I
know you’re not trying to, Maggie. I’m putting you to bed. Oh. Um. That didn’t
sound – you need to rest. Come on. I’ll take you home and tuck you in.”
“Does being a saint run in your family, Little Danvers?”
Maggie wants to know as she walks as straight as she can out the back door with
Kara’s arm around her. Kara just chuckles as she hails a cab, because she
doesn’t think Maggie’s stomach could tolerate being flown.
When she has her tucked in – Maggie stumbles out of her
jeans and strips off her shirt and Kara averts her eyes – she turns off the
light and sets a glass of water on the bedside table.
“Kara?” Maggie mutters, and Kara stills. “Stay?”
Kara smiles and nods and crawls into bed next to her sister’s
girlfriend. “Alex loves you, Maggie. Alex loves you so much.”
Maggie falls asleep with Kara’s arms around her and a smile
on her face, because this must be what it feels like to have a sister.
“ This actor is already much loved, but with this performance has achieved the status of the very best among us actors. And that’s why this year’s Evening Standard Natasha Richardson Best Actress Award goes to Billie Piper for Yerma. ”
Spin Zone: I LOVE that some of the cast aren’t professionally-trained singers, and that certain songs may reflect as such.
It’s not an “Everyone Becomes Awesome Singers!” spell. It’s an “Everyone Starts Singing!” spell. Silly as it may be to call something unrealistic on a show about fairy tales and magic, but it would be infuriatingly unrealistic if everyone bursting into song somehow also happened to have this amazing, classically-trained, experienced voice.
Note: I’m not really sure if this is angst, I just wrote what came to my mind. I tried the best i could to make it closer to angst. But angst or not, i hope you like it. x.
“Vampire; Mythological being who survives feeding of the vital essence of living creatures.”
You notice something walking behind you as you walked through the long halls of the Hospital you worked in. The faster you walked, faster that thing walked. The fear of looking back and and seeing something chasing you made you run a little. The end of the hallway was really close and you were almost getting to the bathroom.
You got to the bathroom almost kicking the door to get in. As soon as you got in to “safety” you looked back to check if there was something behind you and saw nothing but the long and empty hall. The lights strangely flickered a bit as you closed the bathroom door and a cold wind passed by you.
“Running from something?” A sweet and soft voice talked from behind you, scaring you a little. You quickly looked back and saw a girl standing close to the sinks, washing her hands. “I’m sorry, did I startled you?”
“A little. I’ll never get used to these hallways. It always feel like I’m being chased.” She giggled at you and you could see how white and perfect her teeth were, she were really pretty, “Oh, I’m Y/n, nice to meet you” You held out your hand and she grabbed it, shaking it a little.
“Joohyun. But some people call me Irene.”
You couldn’t help but notice how cold her hands were. Almost like she didn’t have blood running in her veins. “Are you one of the interns? I’ve never seen you around her before.”
“Yeah it’s my first day.” She stared at you for some time, a little longer than people normally do, “Um… Can you tell me where’s the place where they keep the blood bags? One of the doctors asked me for it and I couldn’t find it.”
You explained to her how to get to the the room where they keep the blood. While you were talking you noticed that she wouldn’t stop looking at your for not even a second. It was weird, but you didn’t minded so much. While she walked away you saw that she wasn’t wearing the usual green clothing that the interns usually use. In that moment you thought you may have done something really bad by telling a stranger where the Hospital keep blood bags. But even if she wasn’t an intern, what would she gonna do with blood? Steal it? Probably not.
You thought, as you walked back to your “office” so you could get your things. It was almost time for your shift to end and you couldn’t be more excited to go home. You were tired and needed some rest. You took your purse and walked out to the parking lot where your car were parked. It was a really dark and cold night, the jacket you were wearing barely kept you warm. “Shit, I should have brought two of them.”
You got into your car and started driving out of the almost empty parking lot of the Hospital. You drove for almost all the usual 35 minutes of distance from the hospital to your house and you were getting closer to having the rest you needed. When you were getting closer and closer to your house a woman jumped in front of your car, being thrown up in the air and then falling to the ground.
You desperately ran out of your car to go check on her. You turned her around and she was bleeding a lot. You cleaned her face with your hand and shock hit you even harder; It was Joohyun. You got back from her a little, you were probably getting crazy. The thoughts that ran throught your head was making you dizzy. They were screaming “try to help her, you almost killed her”
Your guilty thoughts made you so dizzy that you didn’t even realized when she got up and started to walk. Just like that. You rushed and got up too, grabbing her arm and making her turn back to look at you. The expression in her face was empty and you could see sadness in her eyes.
“Oh my God, I’m sorry- You’re bleeding so much…” She looked down at her her stomach and touched it, groaning in pain. “We have to get this cleaned up or it’ll get infected.” You ran back to your car and looked for a emergency kit you always kept for, well… emergencies, but it wasn’t there. “shit” you thought, “the hospital is too far to go back now. What am I gonna do…”
You looked at her and she was standing in the exact same place and position where you left her. She looked in extreme pain. “My house it’s not that far from here…” What you were about to do was extremely crazy and could be dangerous for you. But you couldn’t leave her there like that.
“Get in the car.” You said walking back towards and pulling her into your car. “I did this to you and I’m gonna fix it.”
She sat in the car and did nothing other than pressing her wound. She didn’t asked you where you were taking her, and almost didn’t move. You two got to your house, and she still didn’t do nothing. You got out of the car, walked to her side opening the door and unlocking her seatbelt. When you got closer to her she looked away from you and covered her nose with her hand. She looked extremely disturbed and annoyed, but you ignored it.
You two walked inside your house and the longer she stood beside you, the most she looked disturbed and it was starting to annoy you.
“Stay here, I’ll get the medical kit.” You said as you opened the door and got inside, leaving her alone in the living room. You quickly ran upstairs to look for the medical kit. You looked everywhere and after some time you found it on the bathroom’s cabinet. When you look up you saw her by the reflection of the mirror. She was standing right behind you.
She looked so pale and her eyes were bigger and darker. She smiled at you and you could see her teeth were bigger. Way bigger. You didn’t knew if you were scared and crazy or amazed and curious. She looked like a hallucination. At the same time you wanted to run away and call the police, you wanted to stay with her. Something crazy was driving you to her. Like a magnet. You couldn’t look away from her and she didn’t looked away from you. It was like you were hypnotized.
You could feel your body burn when she started to get closer and you couldn’t move or think straight. It was like you were stuck, it felt like you couldn’t move but you did moved, walking back, unconsciously. Her eyes were turning darker as she got closer to you. Your back hit the cold sink behind you and you were forced to stop getting away from her, while she slowly got closer and closer to you.
You felt your body getting heavy and burn even more as she got her face closer to yours, almost kissing you. She looked deep into your eyes and you could see your reflection in her dark bright eyes. Her face looked totally different from what it was earlier. Her delicated expressions were gone. Her mouth looked bigger and her eyes were getting darker and darker. Her skin looked lifeless and palier; it was almost like you could see her blood running on her veins. She looked like a monster. But she still looked so pretty, your eyes were stuck on hers.
She slowly moved her head down to your neck and breathed in and out. You could hear and feel her warm and heavy breath on your neck but it wasn’t frightening you. She moved her head back up to stare at you and placed her hands filled with her own blood on the wall, inches away from you.
“What are you?”
You were so curious that you coudnt hold it back. It was almost like she wanted you to ask it and made you do it. Your voice sounded so low and muffled that only she could hear it. She moved her head close to your ear, her lips almost touching you.
It had been a month since Bucky went back under. A month since you started to try and find a solution- but nothing. You and T’Challa’s therapists tried to find something, anything that would help from certain kinds of therapies, even looking into brain surgery but nothing would suffice. It had been a month since you had slept properly.
You huffed onto the couch, head in hands after for doctor’s appointment. T’Challa had some of the finest doctor’s in the world and he insisted that you have regular appointments about your eye. They did wonders so it no longer looked as disgusting however, you were never going to get back your full sight. You probably had about 40% vision in your eye. However, due to their fantastic surgical work, you no longer felt the need for the eyepatch, which seemed to be the only positive outcome of anything in the past month.
You groaned once more before leaning forward and grabbing a book called “Changing the Way the Brain Thinks” in an attempt to find something useful. Wanda heard your frustration and joined you on the couch.
“Are you okay?” She asked. You looked up and she could see the dark circles under your eyes. You smiled solemnly before placing the useless book back on the coffee table.
“I’m fine, not any worse than usual.” You said. She nodded, placing a hand on your knee.
“We’ll find something, I promise.” You nodded at her words, opening your mouth to speak before being interrupted by Clint’s voice. He walked in from the kitchen, a bowl of food in his hands as he spoke to Wanda.
“Hey kiddo, how was your date last night?” he asked her. Your eyes widen as you turned to her, gaping.
“Date?! Wanda since when did you have a date? Who was he?” You burst. Clint laughed at your outburst, sitting down across from you. She laughed too before answering.
“He asked me the other day, one of T’Challa advisors. But you were so busy I didn’t want to take up any of your time.”
“oh my god, Wanda, I’m so sorry, from now on you have my full attention.” You said sitting back and letting her speak.
“Sooo,” Clint spoke up wiggling his eyebrows, “how did it go?”
I’m the only one that is surprised everyone is shocked with Melka’ shitshow today? I don’t want to look like a pretentious know-it-all, but it was easy to see it coming. I’m more surprised with Kapi’s perfomance tbh, she was looking really good prior this week.
Director sanvers Lucy and Alex pampering Maggie bc she needs to be treated like the queen she is 😭
Okay, so like, I absolutely meant for this to be porn. But apparently Maggie needed some therapy and all the hugs last night so hopefully this isn’t too disappointing. It’s long. And a one way ticket to hard core emotion porn with some soft core actual porn to round it out.
It starts with flowers at the precinct. Alex would never do that, but Lucy would.
Lucy would wait until the day after she left for Washington for a weeklong trip of arguing black ops budgets with men who thought like her father, Lucy whose days were hard and lonely and 5,000 miles away from the arms of her lovers, Lucy would hear the cracks in their voices through tinny phone calls and FaceTime, and Lucy would think of them, of Alex and Maggie who had each other. On the rare occasions that Alex was away at a conference it was much the same, although the style was usually food delivered via caped superheroines. Maggie, well Maggie could get so caught up in a case that she could barely breathe, thoughts and theories and facts and witness statements swirling around in her mind like a hurricane, Maggie as the eye of the storm and all else beyond the storm wall.
Selfish. Pig headed. Obsessed with work.
She tried not to be. Alex brought light into the darkness, shining hope and happiness and all the things Maggie never thought she’d deserve. And then Lucy, steady and sure, dragging her out when the darkness crept in to try to extinguish the light. They were perfect, and so much more than she deserved, and sometimes Maggie really couldn’t see how she fit in the lives of such perfect women. They could have each other without the mess she brought, the baggage weighing down every breath she took, an anchor around their necks.
And Alex, who could get wrapped up in work herself, lost in the science and protecting her sister and proving her mother wrong, Alex would pick up on these moments and call her on it, but sometimes that was too much too soon, and Maggie would say something she regretted instantly, taking herself away before she did something worse. Alex would let her go, but call Lucy or Kara or James or Winn or anyone really, because she had friends she could count on to pull her useless girlfriend out of the gutter before something went wrong.
But Lucy, sometimes she had a sixth sense. Sometimes she could tell through a text, through a pause just a beat too long that it was all too much for Maggie, too many doubts, too many insecurities, too many memories weighing, dragging at her, pulling her away from them. And then Lucy would do something about it.
Like send flowers to the precinct on a day Maggie knows she’s stuck in meetings and can’t be called to be yelled at for wasting money buying her dead things that brighten up the room and smell like Lucy’s perfume, light and floral and almost like she’s right there leaning on Maggie’s desk in her dress blues and shooting down the assholes that Maggie works with. Almost.
And Lucy would clue Alex in early, caution her about pushing too much, too soon, too fast, stop her default Agent mode and flip the switch to concerned girlfriend. So Alex would get off of work early on the tough days, she’d convince Calloway to keep an eye on her and text Alex with any changes to her schedule, to let her know if Maggie would be staying late or leaving early (and one day Maggie would find out what Alex had on him, swear to god) so that she could be waiting outside, gorgeous and confident astride her bike. Waiting to take Maggie back to the apartment that was quickly becoming less Alex’s and more theirs, all three of them, not letting Maggie slink back to her quickly emptying apartment with the one sad little tree that didn’t do well with change and the double bed with rougher sheets and an Ikea couch. Alex would and did take her home, where food was staying warm in the oven from wherever Kara had gotten it (because Alex loved Lucy and Maggie, she didn’t want them dead from food poisoning), the lights on low, not for mood but for calm, fire raging no matter the season and the thermostat set for comfort. Alex would undress her slowly and help her change into soft cottons that didn’t belong to her, would drag her to the table to eat, the couch to cuddle, the large bath to soak in lavender bubbles. And Alex wouldn’t push, not if Lucy tells her not to.
So it starts with flowers at the precinct and a quiet dinner at home.
And the next day it’s the vegan chocolates that Maggie mentioned once to Alex in passing and there’s no card but it’s sitting on her desk and while the boys in blue are eyeing it, she knows they’ve been threatened with bodily harm not to touch them, because she opens the box and they’re all there, all accounted for, not a single one missing even though the bullpen is full and she works with a bunch of assholes. Maggie eats them, one by one, savoring each bite, sitting at her desk, right where the assholes can see her. Because while she sometimes doesn’t know where she fits or what god had mercy on her to bring Alex and Lucy into her life, she knows she is loved, and some days she lets herself believe it.
And after work Alex might not be waiting but James is, and he has his bike and his camera, and she rides bitch for her new brother. She might talk, she might not, but he’s there with a smile and a full-bodied hug, giving her a piggyback ride along whatever trail he wanted to try this week to whatever clearing had the least light pollution and a ride home to the arms of Maggie’s girlfriend.
So it starts with flowers at the precinct and a quiet dinner at home.
And sometimes there wouldn’t be flowers or chocolates, but there’d be coffee delivered by a junior reporter with a sunny smile, apologetic because there were donuts but she was hungry and Maggie knows how many calories that particular appetite needs to be satiated. And Kara wouldn’t touch, wouldn’t hug, but she’d stand close enough for the heat of an alien furnace to start to thaw the cold that surrounded her. And Kara would leave with a wink and a smile, and Calloway would ask how the hell Sawyer knew so many beautiful women. Maggie would say she was lucky that way, because she was and it might be a day she understood why, but it also might not.
And after work Alex might be waiting again, but this time to catch a quick dinner before heading back to the lab, a lingering kiss and a hug tinged with the scent of ozone and citrus and leather all Alex. Instead of Alex it might be Winn on the Xbox, shouting obscenities through the internet as Maggie kills him once again after teaming up to defeat everyone else (cheaters) in the free for all. One day he might learn that Maggie’s nice but she’s not that nice, and she loves the way Alex picks on her little brother, loves the way he lights up and pretends to hate it, and Maggie wants to play along and fit in so she does the same.
So it starts with flowers at the precinct and a quiet dinner at home.
And still Lucy keeps it light on the phone, complaining about the rigid men with no experience dictating to those who should know better, and Alex isn’t pushing because it’s still too much, too soon. And Maggie isn’t getting better but she isn’t getting worse, and sometimes she smiles enough that the dimples are deep and her eyes sparkle just a bit of feeling. And she still has the two best girlfriends in the world, and no idea why they keep her, and she’s still terrified she’s going to do something to lose them, to push them away.
And it’s a morning with her therapist, the first in months, but she needed it and she needed to let go of the words overflowing her chest and choking her lungs but she didn’t want to taint Alex’s light, to be the moon casting shadows and overtaking the giant life-giving force. And the doc is kind, and patient, and pushy and mean. And Maggie doesn’t mind the yelling and the cursing because it’s aimed at the doctor, not Alex, not Lucy. And the tears that are real, pouring down her face, those are the fears and the fights she wants to pick and the reasons she gives herself to leave, those all come pouring out where it’s safe and controlled and she can’t hurt those she loves the most. And oh, how she loves them.
And maybe today she takes herself home, not to her home, but to Alex’s, to theirs. And she lets herself in with her key (hers, not the spare) and she eats another double toasted bagel, plain, washed down with a beer. Maybe Maggie collapses face first into a pillow that smells of flowers, hands grasping to pull another closer, this one of citrus, while Maggie’s own pillow lays forgotten to the side.
So it starts with flowers at the precinct and a quiet dinner at home..
And sometimes the days repeat in different orders, sometimes she’s confused and feeling lost when gifts continue to be bared and visits paid, but there’s never nothing and no one, even on the days Maggie needs to be alone she has just what she needs and love permeates every breath of every day, as Lucy and Alex work to show they love her and won’t let her go, and the doc tells her they mean it, that the voices given power by self-doubt and denial, voices that sound so much like her father in quiet simmering anger on the day her world came crashing down, they are valid in that she hears them not in what they say.
So it starts with flowers at the precinct and a quiet dinner at home.
And then it’s not just Alex, but Lucy is home, Lucy is early and home and here and not just a voice on the phone. Lucy is there and gorgeous, not a hair out of place, standing tall and strong next to a smiling Alex, her eyes still concerned but they’ve been happier too, in direct relation to Maggie. And Lucy watches, Lucy waits, Lucy lets Maggie direct her next move.
Maggie walks to Lucy and falls to her knees, her face buried in Lucy’s stomach. A manicured hand sinks into her hair, the scent of flowers surrounding her, buffered by ozone and leather and all things Alex as she too drops to her knees, leaning in to kiss Maggie’s head and receive a caress of her own.
It’s Lucy who guides them back to their feet with a gentle tug, Lucy who leads them to the bed.
But it’s Alex who slides the jacket from Maggie’s shoulders. It’s Alex who undoes the belt at her hips, who tucks the gun away safely and returns to strip Maggie bare before the eyes of her lovers, slowly, tenderly, and with great care while Lucy and Alex remain clothed.
It’s Lucy who kisses her first, demanding entrance, nipping and biting and it’s Maggie who melts into Alex at her back, a solid warmth whose arms are the only thing keeping her standing.
It’s Lucy who commands without words, and Maggie who climbs bare onto soft sheets in the wake of softer eyes.
It’s Alex who joins her first, still clothed, who kisses her next, soft and slow, caressing her very soul with love and affection. It’s Alex’s hands who touch her now, grazing skin softly in sweeps and gentle whispers.
And then Lucy. Lucy leads with her lips, with her teeth, with her tongue. Biting and soothing, sucking welts into Maggie’s skin where not even the scars of her darkness dare trespass.
Where Alex is soft, Lucy is hard, and the contrast leaves Maggie spinning, spinning, spinning, spinning, spinning like a top, winding tighter and tighter and tighter and tighter, soul filled to the bursting, skin painted with the promises of eternity by the mouths of her lovers, Maggie spins and winds tighter until like a coil set loose she springs free.
So it starts with flowers at the precinct but it ends with home.
alrighty here we go. i watched tonight’s episode in full and i’m ready to pick it apart and give my general thoughts on it!
first: the animation.
…………………………..yeowch. that’s rough, buddy
i don’t understand why rose is so….powder white? part of me wants to think it’s because she’s an illusion and it’s some kind of ~symbolism~ but i highly doubt it, it’s probably just more eyebleeding palette choices, although here since it’s supposed to be an illusion/dreamlike sequence i can at least understand the choice of eyebleeding colors here
while everyone still looks……..squished and cramped and off-model as per the norm for s4, i gotta admit some of the palettes here i did really enjoy. i wish they would use palettes like this more often instead of the eyebleeding ones they’ve been insistent on using lately
plus, i actually really enjoyed where this one was going for a while. i love how unnatural rose acts throughout this episode. the uncomfortable way she articulates things and how weirdly perfect she seems to be really pushes the point home that this version of rose isn’t real, and is just a projection from steven of what his mother could have been like. or should have been like, rather
but where this episode really takes a nosedive is the ending. even if it is just an illusion, this is steven FINALLY calling out his mom for all of the absolutely abhorrent things she did, he finally gets to yell, he finally gets to tell her what she did was wrong
the way it was voice acted, the way steven finally lashed out, it was all so well fucking done and i was so happy to finally see this happen. i thought all of that buildup would finally pay off to steven realizing that his mother was a liar and a hypocrite who only cared about herself, and it’d just end with her disappearing into smoke for steven himself to think about and have him realize that he can be what his mother couldn’t.
he could try and free the humans from the zoo, he could try and liberate homeworld with the help of bismuth and the other cgs, he could free bismuth from her bubble and realize that she was right and apologize, and he could do his damn best to be better than the person who brought him into existence only to hide from the fact she ruined so much. he wouldn’t live in her shadow, her meek, hiding shadow, he could do what she couldn’t.
but nooooooo, no we can’t have that, we can’t leave things up to audience interpretation, we have to have a ~ooohhh but i wuv you so much so that makes all of your points about me being a liar and a hypocrite moot, come give your mama a hug~ scene and ruin EVERYTHING this episode could have been
like, i know steven is a kid, i know he wants everything to be okay, i know he’s reluctant to hate his own mother, but this was just…unnecessary. he’s seen all the horrible things she’s done. he said it himself that he knows the truth about her. like, it could be construed as steven going to far into his own fantasy he’s in denial that his mother wasn’t perfect and might actually be (gasp) A Bad Person, but with crewniverse’s “uwu If You Fight Your Oppressors You’re Just As Bad As Them!” attitude that interpretation kinda flies out the window since they probably were just playing this straight. like, if you cut out the last two minutes of this episode, it’s waaaayyy better and leaves more room for interpretation.
all in all, i feel like there was a lot of potential for this and in the beginning despite my continued animation gripes i thought this might be the writers learning from their mistakes and Actually making something thoughtful for once, but i was sorely mistaken. this episode felt like such a missed opportunity and i’m sincerely disappointed in that although i shouldn’t expect much nowadays
I would love to be happy. I would love to be optimistic. I would love to keep hope. But when I put those two pieces together, I just can’t:
1) the new character who will appear in the season finale and will be an important part of season 7, described as ”a “strong yet vulnerable” leading man in his late 20s to mid-30s, a gent
who was once optimistic and hopeful but now is a friendless, cynical
2) Jen is leaving.
We all know this young man is future-Henry. It’s obvious. And from the description, I was afraid he lost his optimism and hope because something happened to Emma somewhere in his future, and he traveled in time to change things. But I was sure at this time Jen wouldn’t leave, so I was not worried, everything would be fine…
Now, things are different. With Jen leaving, anything is possible, and Emma Swan is not protected anymore from the foolness of A&E. I swear if they do something terrible to Emma, if they make Jen coming back in the season premiere to do something irremediable to her character to explain why she is not here anymore, I will never forgive them. A&E always said this show is about hope, but I have no faith in them. Look at what they already did, and what they are capable to do. Even to their main character. They don’t care.
I am furious. I am terrified. I would love to be happy about season 7. Colin is so happy I feel bad to be so sad and pissed. But no. I just can’t. And I feel so sorry for that… Even if it’s pure speculation, I can’t stop thinking something bad will happen to Emma soon. I wish I were wrong. I wish they wouldn’t do that. But now the show is renewed, I lost hope completely. And my heart is broken. It would have been much wiser to end now. On a positive note. The ratings won’t get better with a “reboot”, with the departure of the lead actress, the main character, and half part of the cast. They are fool to think it will be good without Emma Swan, the Charmings, Henry and Belle.
3. When do you think Hermione realised she had feelings for Ron?
I like to think she caught on before Ron, mainly because I feel like Viktor was a nice distraction that didn’t ultimately succeed, apart from showing her what she thought she wanted was quite it. But let’s be real - she definitely wouldn’t have wanted to admit that she liked Ron. But who is Hermione Granger to argue with solid facts?
The curtains of the four poster bed were draped around her, providing some isolation from the outside world which Hermione craved at that moment. They were as red as she felt at the moment - though out of embarrassment or irritation, she wasn’t quite sure. Perhaps both.
Honestly, how could Ron think the Cannons latest win meant a turn in their rotten luck? He’d all but scoffed at her gentle but firm explanation, using very well-thought-out Arthimancy statistics to demonstrate the probability of them winning the Cup this year from the position of their ladder. Why did she even bother with him sometimes, it was such a waste of time to explain things to him logically, especially when she was so busy with Viktor and–
And hence her embarrassment. Just before she’d become engaged in a hefty and heated debate about the probability of a Cannons victory, she’d just come back from another… she wasn’t quite sure what to call it. Date? They’d kissed, yes, but it was just once, very chaste, as he was wishing her farewell from their study session. Was she his girlfriend?
Most importantly… did she want to be?
She was confused, and needed some time alone to think. She’d been on several… oh, whatever, dates with Viktor, and he was perfectly lovely, sweet, kind, mature and patient. Perfect, really. But she felt nothing. Absolutely nothing. How was it that studying with Viktor aroused so little in her compared to a 20 minute debate on Quidditch with Ron? She could tell there was something there, she’d been feeling it for the last few… months? but honestly, could she really fancy Ron?
Hermione quickly got out a piece of parchment, her quill and some ink - all in trusty reach in her nightstand. When in doubt, make a list.