really horrible movie

took my little sister and her friends to see IT for her birthday and acted as the legal guardian, and on the way home there was a whole lotta discussion…

my sister: yeah! the actor who plays pennywise is literally like 6'5"

her friends: actually???

me, completely obnoxious and involuntarily: MY KINDA MAN

(then they all just laughed at me)

Maybe It's The Drugs

Imagine being Evans childhood best friend, and he’s over for a smoke session that turns out to be more.

  “Hey, Y/N. What are you doing tonight?” Evan spoke into the phone, almost a whisper. Maybe he’s on set. “Um, nothing actually, I was just going to clean up a little and watch some movies. Why?” Evan was your childhood best friend. You grew up together, and when his career took off you kind of drifted apart, but you both made sure to contact each other every so often. You always picked up, he barely ever did, but you knew it was because he was so busy. “Well, I’m shooting a movie like right down the street from your apartment, and I’ve got the day off tomorrow. Wanna hang out tonight? We can do movies and stay up all night, like we used to?” You smiled to yourself, remembering an adolescent you and Evan, staying up all night, trying alcohol for the first time, smoking cigarettes for the first time, talking on the phone for hours. “Sure, Evan, I would love that. When can you be here?” “Around 8. Smoke?” “I don’t have any.” “I got us. See you then. Bye.” “Bye.” You put the phone on the receiver and leaned against the wall, a familiar feeling growing in your belly. You smiled. Guess I’d better clean get to cleaning sooner than I planned. You pulled out the reusable rubber gloves and your bucket of cleaning supplies, and got to work.

“Jesus Christ, how does this house get so dirty?” You were scrubbing the bathroom floor on your hands and knees, a la Cinderella. In retrospect, it wasn’t even dirty, you just had a thing with germs. You leaned back against your heels and wiped your sweaty forehead. You looked at your phone. 6:45 PM. My god, I have to shower and stuff. You put your cleaning supplies away and walked into your bedroom, grabbing a pair of yoga pants, and your favorite plain pink shirt. You grabbed your bra, and a pair of lacy panties. When you turned the shower on and got undressed, you looked yourself over in the mirror. You had definitely grown up. And so has Evan. He’s not a chubby weirdo anymore. You shook the thought out of your head, it was weird to think of your best friend while you were naked. After thoroughly washing your hair and body, you stepped out onto the cold bathroom floor. You dried off and dressed quickly, your belly getting steadily more uneasy. I don’t understand why my stomach feels so weird. You didn’t like it, it felt like anxiety, but in a weirdly good way. You brushed your teeth and let your hair fall around your shoulders. You walked out into the living room and called the pizza place right around the corner. The time was 7:22 PM and you started to get nervous. 

At 7:45 PM there was a knock on the door, you knew it wasn’t Evan, because he would have just walked in but you still were disappointed when you opened the door and it was just the pizza guy. “Hi, your total is 26.67, please.” You were looking over his shoulder, anxious to see the familiar face that you hadn’t seen in months. “Here’s a 50, keep the change, thanks.” “Really? Thank-” You took the pizzas and shut the door. You couldn’t take the feeling in your stomach any longer, you felt like you might be sick, but also wanted to sing a song. You wanted to sit down and relax, but as soon as your butt touched the couch you shot up and started pacing. You wanted to eat something, but at the same time you wanted to scream and panic. It’s just Evan, Y/N, calm the hell down. This is the geeky boy from next door that you’ve seen in the weirdest stages of his life. This is the chubby boy who threw mud in your face when you were 5. Why are you freaking out? Your pep talk wasn’t helping much. Your front door creaked open and Evan peeked his head inside.

“Honey, I’m home!” He sang out. “Evan!” You jumped up and ran towards him. He held out his arms and you jumped into them. “I missed you so much, Y/N! How have you been?” “Oh you know, just livin’.” He looked you up and down, you felt self conscious all of a sudden. His eyes analyzed everything about you, lingering for a moment on your pushed up cleavage. Your face turned bright red, so you turned around and grabbed the pizza box. “I got us some dinner, I figured if we’re gonna smoke, then I want something good and something I don’t have to make.” He giggled. God, he looks really good. Puberty hit him like a fucking truck. He was no longer chubby, at all. He was wearing sweat pants, and a brown T-shirt. His hair was disheveled. You turned back around and it was your turn to eye him up and down while he took his jacket off. Your eyes stopped at his crotch. Gray sweatpants. The ties came down in front, hanging there, like an aisle way to the bulge you could make out. “What movies are we going to watch?” He asked, smiling. His dimples made your heart do a flip.

You two were seated on your couch, eating pizza and watching a really horrible movie about zombies and strippers. “You know, I’ve seen 5 pairs of tits in this movie already, and it’s been on for like 30 minutes.” Evan laughed. “Yeah, you’ve always been a fan of horror movies with lots of tits.” “If there ain’t tits, it ain’t worth watching.” You mumbled. He pulled out a little baggy and some papers. “Let’s do this sleepover right, shall we?” You nodded your head and watched him as he broke up the green substance. The earthy smell that you had come to love so much was filling up your apartment. He sprinkled it into the paper, and smoothed it out evenly. He worked the paper around the drugs and rolled it up, licking the top and sealing it shut. He pulled out a lighter and lit the end, when it caught fire, he blew it out and put it to his lips, inhaling. He passed it to you, and you did the same. You felt the smoke filling up your lungs, and you held it there, letting it set in. You blew out the smoke and Evan had already taken his second hit. You took it again for yours. “You know, I really miss you Y/N. Like, when I’m filming and haven’t talked to you in a while, you’re all I can think about. I just go to your Facebook page and make sure you’re doing okay.” “I really miss you too, Evan. You’re my best friend.” You said, handing him back the joint. You got up to get some water, but he suddenly grabbed onto your hand and pulled you back down. You ended up half on his lap, half on the couch. Your faces were inches apart, and he opened his mouth a little, blowing smoke out onto your lips. You looked him in the eyes and you saw your reflection. You could feel the effects of the weed taking over. He moved his face towards yours, closing the space between you two. Your lips touched.

You moved your head into his, pressing your lips against his. His tongue flicked your bottom lip, and then traced the outline of your entire mouth. You opened your lips and let him in. Your tongues explored each others mouths for a while. He tasted of marijuana. He had his arms around your shoulder, and a hand on the small of your back. He pulled you into him, and laid back at the same time. You were laying on top of him. He moved both hands down to your ass. One hand lingered there, and another moved to your waist. He pushed your hips into his lap, and you moved your legs up so you were straddling his waist and leaning over to kiss him at the same time. “Evan, what are we doing?” You asked in between gasps of air. “Something I’ve wanted to do for a while.” He whispered into your mouth. You sat up, he was still laying down, and pulled your shirt over your head, throwing it onto your floor. He looked at your chest. His one hand still on your waist, and another traveling up your belly. You reached around and unclipped your bra, throwing it to the side as well, just as his hand grabbed onto your right boob. He squeezed and you leaned back down to kiss him again. You maneuvered your hands down his body to the hem of his shirt, and pulled it up over his head. You were skin to skin, and you pressed together, harder. He was kissing you as if he’d never be able to again. You could feel the longing and the hunger through his lips, and sighs of pleasure. You moved your hand down to his sweats, going to touch the bulge you’d eyed earlier. He grabbed onto your wrist, forcefully. “Ladies first.” He growled into your neck.

He wrapped his arm on your back and sat up, flipping you onto your back, him over top of you. He kissed your jaw bone, your neck, your collar bone, in between your breasts.. He stopped at one your boobs and kissed your nipple. He bared his teeth and lightly bit down, causing you to let a little moan escape your lips. His hand traveled down to your yoga pants, pulling them up and slipped a hand inside. His fingers grazed your cloth covered clit at the same time that he bit your nipple. The pleasure was growing. He pulled his hand out and went back to kissing your body. Under your breasts, your abdomen, your belly button, the band of your pants. He sat up and pulled your pants off, staring you in the eyes. This is so hot, oh god. He leaned down between your legs and kissed your thighs. Maybe it was the drugs, but where he was leaving wet, warm kisses left your skin tingling. He came up to your panties. He kissed you through the fabric. It was a hard, hot kiss. You bit your bottom lip. He hooked a finger around them and tore them off. Holy shit he just TORE MY PANTIES OFF. Is this real life? If I wasn’t dripping wet before, I am now. “You’re so wet Y/N” Evan muttered. almost as if reading your thoughts. He lowered his head and kissed you again. You were sweating with anticipation. You felt his warm, wet tongue touch your skin and you gasped. Your hands found his hair and his tongue danced in circles around your clit. “Oh, Evan..” His fingers found their way into your entrance. The feeling of his fingers inside you, and his tongue expertly flicking your little nub was enough to push you over the edge, but you wanted it to go on for as long as possible. You opened your legs a little wider, and grinded against his face a little. He took his fingers out and wrapped his hands around your thighs, pulling you into his face. He growled into your body. The vibration from his mouth felt really good. Your fingers tightened in his hair and your heartbeat sped up. You could feel your release coming, and Evan sensed it because he started eating faster and harder. “Oh fuck Evan, I’m gonna come.” You let him know, and he ate like it was his last meal. It pushed you over the edge and you felt your warm juices flow, your body was trembling and your breathing was ragged. His tongue moved in large, slow circles until your breathing returned to normal. He popped his face up and smiled at you, that big goofy smile that suddenly became the sexiest thing you’d ever seen. “This is a great sleepover” He said. You laughed. Your high from the drugs, and your orgasm mixed together. We need to have sleepovers more often.  


And when the world treats you way too fairly, well, it’s a shame I’m a dream. (insp)


get to know me meme [3/5] favorite movies >> Liberal Arts

“The other day I was crossing the street, lost in my head about something - a not uncommon state of affairs. I was listening to the overture and as the music began to swell I suddenly realized that: I had hands. And legs, and a torso, and that I was surrounded by people and cars. It’s hard to explain exactly what happened, but I felt in that moment that the divine - however we may choose to define such a thing - surely swells as much in the concrete and taxi cabs as it does in the rivers, lakes and mountains. Grace, I realized, is neither time nor place dependent. All we need is the right soundtrack.”

List of Black Friday Incidents:

Black Friday is well known as the biggest sale day of the year, and almost as well known for the fights that break out in stores by greedy patrons hoping to get in on the action. Here is a partial list of incidents in stores across the US:

  • In Shreveport, two men were arrested for stealing a Star Wars toy from a seven year old girl.
  • In Las Vegas, a Best Buy was partly burned down when two women fought over a deluxe vape lighter.
  • In San Diego, four died in a stampede at a Whole Foods attempting to grab the last box of dried strawberries.
  • In New York, fifteen were suffocated attempting to squeeze into a small kiosk that sold Guitar Hero limited edition Guitars.
  • Visiting president János Áder of Hungary and his entourage were killed in a clash with Romanian President Klaus Iohannis‘s guard when both world leaders attempted to buy the same waffle iron at Target.
  • A stampede killed at least 60 in a Wal-Mart in Montana when the new XBoxOne game “People Stampede Simulator 3: Can You Survive?” was released at midnight.
  • Actor Hugh Jackman was crushed to death by at least 15 assailants, though this may have been a result of his really horrible Peter Pan movie and not related Black Friday sales.
  • A GameStop was raided and burned by PlayStation enthusiasts when Nintendo Loyalists seized a shipment of Star Wars Battlefront, causing the store to delay its opening for three hours. GameStop has reported a 4 million dollar loss but their insurance agency has stated, “Eh, we can give you maybe $15 for all these games.”
  • A religious pundit flipped over several money-changing tables at his local church, insisting that the church had become a den of thieves through its commercial activities, thus ruining Christmas. The pundit has already been arrested, he had escaped but was caught when one of his followers betrayed him to the police in a nearby garden. The pundit is said to have forgiven all involved as he felt they did not know what they were doing, and will be released on bail after 3 days on condition that he perform community service.
  • Some jerk took my headphones.

You’re a Marine. It’s the reason you are still alive right now. Remember your tradecraft and you’ll be fine. 


A HTTYD AU I’ve been planning for awhile… just now starting to sketch it out. It’s a literal Alternate Universe… takes places someplace parallel to Earth. Takes place in an era reminiscent of 1910 - 1930.

Hiccup is royalty, but he’d much rather be off flying his secret dragon, which he can’t let anyone know about because dragon’s are despicable creatures that should be hunted and hung up on walls for decorations.

Astrid is a young woman who works for a secret organization which has a dubious intent. She’s kind of a special agent of sorts.

They end up crossing paths and partnering up, but I haven’t really come up with a plot yet so I don’t know what they do. They’re hiding from the law and Hiccup’s father, while doing missions or something of that sort for this organization.

but enough with all that boring stuff. I’ve officially given up trying to make HTTYD characters look like freaking Httyd characters. These look nothing like the characters they’re supposed to.

I need to learn how to draw these characters. So you may not see a lot of this au (even though I’m constantly thinking of it) until I manage to figure out how to make my art not suck so bad.

I'm starting to think really horrible movies are my thing or something

Because right now I’m having the funnest time ever with drinks and a marathon of Leprechaun, Leprechaun in the hood and Luck of the irish. 

I didn’t even know Leprechaun in the hood was a thing until tonight.