one sentence from a wip (or something like that, i’ve been in the library a while, time is an illusion), tagged by @sinkingorswimming

Yuuri spends the first day of filming Plucked From the Vine sitting at the judging table sans pants and soaked in the remains of a Riesling that had finished with strong notes of despair and internal anguish. Not that he was projecting on the wine or anything.

tagging @handsingsweapon @pencilwalla @kixboxer @cafecliche @renaissancefic @iwritevictuuri @vntya @forochel @forovnix


This is funny but it also raises an interesting question, what would reality TV shows be like in the Marvel universe? Clearly they still have a Jersey Shore equivalent, but imagine Tony Stark hosting a show like Donald Trump’s old series The Apprentice (it truly would not be surprising lol). Mary Jane Watson being on America’s Next Top Model or Project Runaway. Dazzler hosting one of those singing shows, like The Voice. Wonder Man is such a joke I’m sure he’d have his own Bachelor show lol. Shows modeled off of real life Avengers, perhaps David Blaine getting Doctor Strange to make a guest appearance on his show where contestants try to be the top magician, the “Sorcerer Supreme”, if you will. Or a group of X-teens appearing in a show together, half to improve the public perception of mutants, and half because come on most teenagers would jump at the chance to be TV stars.

From Amazing Spider-Man #623 (2010)

Get to know me!

1) Who had the biggest impact on you while you were growing up?
2) What are your hobbies?
3) If you could have dinner with any 3 people (dead or alive), who would they be and why?
4) What sorts of things make you laugh?
5) What is your biggest goal?
6) Do you have any pet peeves?
7) What do you like to do on the weekend?
8) Have you ever had a nickname? And if so, what was the story behind it?
9) What was your favorite tv show while you were growing up?
10) What are your favorite tv shows now?
11) What are your favorite movies?
12) Tell me one thing that would surprise me about you?
13) What do you look for in a girl?
14) What do you look for in a guy?
15) Tell me about what you were like as a kid?
16) What are some of the items on your bucket list?
17) Have you found your calling? If so, what is it?
18) Do you, or have you ever had any pets? If so, tell me about them?
19) Who has been the biggest influence in your life?
20) Tell me about a challenge that you’ve had to overcome and how you overcame it?
21) If you could only listen to one song for the rest of your life, what would it be and why?
22) if you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be and why?
23) If you could only watch one movie for the rest of your life, what would it be and why?
24)If you could only watch one tv show for the rest of your life, what would it be and why?
25) Tell me about your favorite childhood memory and what made it so special to you?
26) What is your favorite commercial that you’ve ever seen and why?
27) If you were stuck on a deserted island and you could only bring one thing, what would it be, and why?
28) If you could give your younger self one piece of advice, what would it be?
29) Who is your celebrity crush?
30) Who is your favorite music artist?
31) What is your favorite music genre?
32) What is your favorite broadway musical?
33) What is your favorite cartoon?
34) What is your favorite album?
35) What is your favorite color?
36) What would you do if you won a million dollars?
37) If you could have one superpower, what would it be?
38) What would be your superhero name?
39) Which actor/actress would play you in a movie about your life?
40) What would be your dream vacation?
41) Where did you grow up?
42) If you could trade lives with anybody for a day, who would it be and why?
43) If you could be on any reality tv show, which one would it be?
44) What’s your favorite book?
45) Who’s your favorite author? 
46) Who is your favorite YouTuber?
47) What’s your favorite tv show?
48) Which celebrity do you admire most and why?
49) What are some of your favorite childhood memories?
50) What countries have you traveled to?
51) What is your favorite drink?
52) What is your favorite restaurant? 
53) Do you like to cook?
54) What is something you think everyone should do at least once in their lives?
55) What’s the best thing that happened to you last week? 

victor nikiforov vs. the world

a scott pilgrim vs. the world inspired au ( a loose au)

okay so here’s an au i’ve thought about quite a bit (AND FORGOT TO ADD TO MY LIST HAHAHAH GOOD JOB ME) but idk that i’ll get around to writing it? i’d like to but also here’s the au as not!fic:

  • Victor is obviously Scott Pilgrim. You can fight me on this. We will have words. 
  • Battle of the bands sponsored by ass man industries.
  • in this au knives is JJ who has a one-sided crush on victor b/c DAMN IT HE JUST WANTS VICTOR TO REMEMBER HIS NAME
    • “jean jorts le forge?”
    • “john jacob jingleheimer?”
    • “Jack Jeffery leCanada?”
    • he’s also an evangelist vegan
      • who misses canadian bacon EVEN THOUGH IT’S NOT REAL BACON
  • He has to fight Yuuri’s seven evil exes except, well, some of them are not so evil:
    • Yuuri:…..exes???? who are you talking about
    • *cue stampede* *line forms*
    • definitely features the harem of chads
    • seung gil wanted to date phichit but thought yuuri and phichit were a package deal so  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ at least his dog liked yuuri
      • they’re still dog friends
      • victor is the in law seung gil doesn’t like
    • phichit is yuuri’s ex only because they got married for tax reasons 
      • “also yuuri wouldn’t could a lot of the others. i don’t really want to fight you so…selfie contest and then shovel talk and then sushi?” 
      • Victor: *weeps in relief*
      • also victor: so did you guys sign a pre-nup or??? how quickly can we get that divorce to go through?
    • yurio fights victor mainly because of his TERRIBLE TEENAGE CRUSH on yuuri. Victor wins, though Yurio will argue he cheated. Yuuri is just like “oh wow, your form has gotten a lot better” but then Victor is all draped over him and it made Yurio have a feeling. 
      • yurio CAN’T HANDLE IT
      • until otabek, who has literally been waiting in the same alley for the entire story just WAITING for yurio zooms up and then they go and get burritos
    • yuuko and takeshi are the twins
      • just let me have my nishigori sandwich
    • chris is the final boss (pre-canon yuuchris what up) and gives Victor the sword, complete with suggestive puns and innuendo b/c 
      • Chris:“the Power of Love could mean a lot of things. I’m open to interpretations. If you want to share..”
      • Victor: OKAY BYE YUURI IS MY HUSBAND NOW *smoke bomb*
  • Georgi is obviously Victor’s drunk heterosexual roommate (though maybe popnaughty is an option in this au IT’S FLEXIBLE *rim shot*)
  • mila, sara and leo are victor’s band mates
  • yuuri is also in a band because REASONS
  • obviously victor also has to fight off all the people who are falling for yuuri so he’s constantly busy
  • victor and yuuri, buoyed by the power of love buy a farm in the country with their 27 poodle sons and daughters. 
Late, Yet So Sweet. (A Smutty Harry Styles Blurb)

- a quick 30 minute blurb where Harry eats Y/N out at 1 am, hope you enjoy it. xx

The Sun set behind the horizon a few hours ago, but the sky is still baby blue, and the last rays of light are creeping through the blinds, brightening up the dark living room.

Heavy breaths and pants, quiet whimpers and deep moans linger in the open space, as well as the faint sound of the television, which still has on the stupid reality-tv shows, that got left in the left behind a while ago, when Harry nuzzled his face in the crook of your neck, started kissing the supple skin, and put his hand down your sweatpants, pressing your clit with his thumb, whimpering:

“Let m’ taste yeh, please. Miss yeh on my tongue.”

With your back slouched against the corner of the sofa, you take a hold of the back of Harry’s head, which is settled right between your thighs, his body rested on his knees on the hardwood floor.

You moan softly, when Harry wraps his lips around your swollen clit, and suckles the sensitive nubbin, sending shivers of pleasure down your spine. Your toes curl up against the sofa cushions, and your legs tremble slightly when Harry flicks his tongue quickly over your clit, making him smile up to you. Even with his cheeks hollowed, his deep dimples still manage to make an appearance.

Harry can feel his cock twitching in his black Calvin Klein boxers, when you tug at his curls, pushing his mouth closer to your dripping wet core. A low groan escapes his lips, vibrating against you.

Harry’s hands travel up your front, his cold rings dragging against your hot skin, to your breasts and cup them under the thin fabric of your t-shirt, that is crinkled over at the hem, showing off a bit of your skin and your belly button.

The filthy sounds of Harry slurping on you and humming, loving the sweet taste of you, makes you shudder and your eyes flutter shut, and your lips fall into an o-shape.

“So fuckin’ sweet, angel.” his words get muffled by your wet cunt, and make your hips shift, grinding yourself gently against his mouth. 

His other hand starts slowly sliding down on your skin, and settles on your lower tummy, that place he finds perfect to have midday naps on. You place your own hand over his, holding tightly to his tattooed wrist.

“Oh, shit.” you curse under your breath, when you feel the burning sensation in your tummy add up, making you complete mess. You’re panting with shaky legs, your knuckles turning white from gripping too hard, whether to the pillows and blankets, or Harry’s short curls.

You cry out, when Harry pulls himself away from you. With eyes half-lidded and your chest rising up and down in a rapid speed, you look down at him, watching in awe as his eyes sparkle when he locks them with yours, his raspberry lips glistening from your juices, as well as his slightly scruffy chin and jaw. 

“What, why-why did you stop?” you pant out, your hand gripping onto the pillow next to you, but Harry just chuckles at your question. 

“Why wouldn’t I?” he answers, now a smirk curved on his lips.

“Let m’ feel yeh cum aroun’ my cock, how does that sound, love?”

I can't watch reality TV shows anymore. I don't know what's changed, but overnight I stopped fucking with them. It's boring and honestly, I can't relate to any of the storylines plus I feel like it gives a bad reflection on my community.

Grown women, 47 years old, still fucking around with waste men and throwing drinks at other women. God forbid I continue to let that nonsense into my frequency. If I’m not leaving the program with something insightful, then I’m not watching it.

All mythology instantly becomes like a thousand times better if you imagine it as like a reality TV show with those one person interviews.

Example: Set: so my boat sinks, right? I look over and this little shit Horus is sailing past me with the biggest shit eating grin on his face. Turns out his boat was made of wood. Cheater.

Example 2: Loki: and of course they didn’t wanna pay for the fuckin wall, so who has to risk their ass to fix this entire shitty situation? Yours truly, moi.

(Please feel free to add onto this.)

TV Shows in Foreign Languages

Hi guys 😊 Which TV shows in foreign languages are you going to watch this school year? I really need some suggestions!
Here are my favorite ones: 

- Quotidien (previously Le petit journal)
- Kaamelot 
- Bref
- Scènes de ménage
- Koh Lanta
- Presque adultes 
- We also have a lot of reality TV Shows, I personally hate them but if you’re into that type of TV, I’ll recommand “Les Anges” and “Secret story”, it can be a good way to pick up some slang

Las chicas del Cable (my favorite Spanish one)
El ministerio del tiempo 
Los Serrano
Fisica o quimica 
(You can also watch Narcos in Spanish!)

- Brazilian Portuguese:
- 3% (a really good show, I would recommend it even if you don’t study Portuguese 🇧🇷) 
- Domingão do Faustão
- Avenida Brasil
- Programa do Porchat
- Programa Silvio Santos 
- Jô soares

- Master of None (definitely not an Italian show but they do speak in Italian quite a lot in season 2)
- Il grande fratello
- L'isola dei famosi
- Amici di Maria de Filippi

- Skam

Also a lot of countries have their own version of shows like “The voice”, “Masterchef” etc… so if you like one of these tv shows, why not watching it in your target language(s)?

Btw if you’re leaning English and need some suggestions, my favorite shows are: How to get away with murder, Vikings, Mr Robot, Stranger things, Atlanta, The 100 and Orange is the new black.
Also I used to watch Downton Abbey and Sherlock and these ones really helped me learning English. Victoria and The Crown have a very good English too and are both super interesting. 

Here you go! Good luck if you’re going back to school, you can do it :)

ID #90955

Name: Andreia
Age: 26
Country: Portugal

My name’s Andreia, 26 years of age and from Portugal. I’m currently doing a Masters in Museology, so there’s one thing I like a lot, Museums.

I also like to read, watch movies & series, nature, photography, exploring creativity in different ways and diverse mediums. My mail box is open to pretty much anyone/everyone: it doesn’t matter what age, gender or country or whatever it is you want to talk about (though I can only read and write in english, german and portuguese). I’m really bad at these introductions, as I find it always a bit intimidating to have to “resume” yourself in a few lines. Looking forward to get to know you!

Preferences: No!

anonymous asked:

So I think my mom is having sex with my pastor but ion know how to tell my dad , they ain't together no more or anything but the pastor has a wife and I'm already fucking the son so I feel extra guilty , what should I do ?

Get a reality tv show and pitch it to VH1 this is good tv