real-vampirism

autumn/halloween sentence starters! 🍂🍁🎃

masterlist of autumn and halloween themed sentence starters! some are original, but most are collected from other posts.

  • ​❝ i made pumpkin cookies! want to try one? ❞
  • ❝ did you cut yourself carving the pumpkin? let me see it. ❞
  • ❝ stay still i’m almost done with your costume. ❞
  • ​❝ let’s paint pumpkins. ❞
  • ❝ hurry up! we’re going to be late for the costume party! ❞
  • ❝ help me decorate! ❞
  • ​❝ let’s open some windows, okay? ❞
  • ​❝ it’s starting to rain… ❞
  • ​❝ bring a jacket! ❞
  • ​❝ do we really need to go to a pumpkin patch? can’t we just buy one at the store? ❞
  • ​❝ let’s go pick pumpkins! ❞
  • ​❝ it’s chilly out here, you need a coat. take mine. ❞
  • ​❝ you sound sick. are you sick? ❞
  • *sneeze* ​❝ sorry, allergies. ❞
  • ​❝ wanna go out for halloween? ❞
  • ​❝ looks like it’s time to rake the leaves… ❞
  • ​❝ let’s go get hot chocolate then go for a walk. ❞
  • ​❝ let’s go trick-or-treating! ❞
  • ❝ let’s go jump in the leaves! ❞
  • ​❝ come in here where it’s dry! ❞
  • ​❝ it’s dark?! already?! ❞
  • ​❝ ooh it’s chilly out. ❞
  • ​❝ please, enough with the pumpkin spice. ❞
  • ​❝ good morning. no, don’t get up, it’s raining, let’s stay in bed a little longer… ❞
  • ❝ did you hear about the werewolf/vampire/witch roaming around this town on halloween night? ❞
  • ❝ let’s go to the haunted house! oh, please, please, please, please?! ❞
  • ❝ i don’t get scared. i’m practically fearless. ❞
  • ❝ did you hear that? ❞
  • ❝ we have to get out of here! ❞
  • ❝ are you going to hide in my shoulder the whole time? or actually watch the movie? ❞
  • ❝ i’m not going in a graveyard. ❞
  • ❝ what did you get? ❞
  • ❝ want to trade candy? ❞
  • ❝ i got a rock. ❞
  • ❝ don’t blame me! it was your idea to come in here! ❞
  • ❝ what are you going as for halloween this year? ❞
  • ❝ i just can’t wait for halloween! ❞
  • ❝ you should totally buy that costume! ❞
  • ❝ trick or treat! ❞
  • ❝ happy halloween! ❞
  • ❝ happy fall! ❞
  • ❝ i wanna make sure that my jack-o-lantern is the best! ❞
  • ❝ i’ll race you through the corn maze! ❞
  • ❝ that guy in the gorilla costume has been following us for the past ten blocks. ❞
  • ❝ aww come on! it was a prank! ❞
  • ❝ please, please, PLEASE no scary movie marathon! ❞
  • ❝ that wasn’t funny! ❞
  • ❝ i keep tripping over my costume. ❞
  • ❝ i’m not sure we should go down that street. ❞
  • ❝ no fair! your costume is getting you more candy. ❞
  • ❝ faster! we need to get to all of the houses! ❞
  • ❝ forget being ‘too old’ to trick or treat. i’m doing this forever! ❞
  • ❝ i don’t like these woods. ❞
  • ❝ i just saw something! ❞
  • ❝ look at that intestine cake! ❞
  • ❝ i’m a real vampire. ❞
  • ❝ do you think stuff really happens on halloween? like..supernatural stuff. ❞
  • ❝ i made us matching costumes! ❞
  • ❝ i think i just saw something move outside your window…is someone watching us? ❞
  • ❝ you’re not going to make me carve this pumpkin all by myself, are you? ❞
  • ❝ did you hear there’s a masquerade ball this halloween? let’s go! ❞
  • ❝ you shouldn’t go out there! ❞
  • ❝ s-scared? me? i’m not..scared. ❞

AU where Persons A and B are roommates and A is a vampire and doesn’t even hide it but B just thinks they’re joking all the time.

“Is that wine? Can I have a sip?”

“It’s blood.”

“Haha, whatever you say.”


“Where did you get these sweet fake fangs?”

“They’re real. I’m a vampire.”

“Sure you are, and I’m Bigfoot.”

Gotham For Real #1
  • Barbara: Disco vampire thing with your hair
  • Me: *spits out my tea*
  • Me: WHY IS THAT THE MOST ACCURATE DESCRIPTION OF OSWALD'S HAIR EVER.

AUs where Damien is a vampire and Robert is a vampire hunter are absolutely hilarious too me bc like. Robert wouldnt think Damien was a vampire at first.

Like he’d think that no vampire would make it that obvious and would chok it up to Damien’s goth and victorian aesthetic.
The umbrella in sunlight? Mustve been a Victorian thing!
He hangs out in cementeries? Its a goth thing!
His clothing? Again he’s a goth!
All his drinks are suspiciously the color of blood? Hes a gentleman, surely its red wine!
Plus what vampire makes their last name “Bloodmarch”???? All of this would be a dead give away theres no way that a REAL vampire would do all this!

And then when he finds out that Damien actually IS a vampire hes just so angry because iTS SO OBVIOUS BUT HE THOUGHT NO VAMPIRE WOULD EVER MAKE IT SO BLATANTLY CLEAR THAT THEYRE NOT HUMAN HES SO BAD AT HIS J O B

extreme cryptid and conspiracy enthusiast Wes Weston tho

“No but seriously guys the moon landing was fake it was actually done on a set to cover up the alien civilisation they found”

“Bigfoot is real they’re just migrating North due to climate change!”

“Okay look I’m not saying it was aliens BUT-”

“It was aliens”

“Ghosts are real okay my grandfather met one once”

“Lizardmen”

“Look guys I SWEAR TO GOD I saw Danny Fenton turn into Danny Phantom like LOOK AT THEM THEY ARE THE SAME- okay look YES I was wrong about that whole Sam Manson is a Vampire thing but-”

“FRUIT BAT VAMPIRES ARE A THING, THE GOVERNMENT JUST DOESN’T WANT US TO KNOW THAT VEGANS ARE REALLY THE UNDEAD”

“I think the mayor is a vampire, no not a fruit vampire the other kind”

“FRUIT VAMPIRES ARE REAL D A M N I T”

the only battle Wes cares about more than the Phantom/Fenton conspiracy is the existence of FRUIT VAMPIRES

Screw TVD! Check Out A Real Vampire Show! From Dusk Till Dawn.

For all of those who hate TVD, and those who were pissed off at the shitshow called a finale, and those who were tired of watching characters get mistreated constantly (Bonnie, Stefan, Tyler, and even Enzo (he had such great potential)) go on Netflix and/or Putlocker.com, and check out a real vampire show called “From Dusk Till Dawn.”

They have 2 badass very sexy handsome brothers that are truly ride or die for each other:

Originally posted by duskgifs

Originally posted by kendrasaunders

Originally posted by kendrasaunders

Originally posted by samiisaur95

Originally posted by samiisaur95

Seriously, ya’ll can keep gawking at Ian Somerhalder who’s not even that handsome he looks like a creep. Ya’ll don’t know what ya’ll missing out on with this sexy beast.

Originally posted by dailygeckobros

Originally posted by richiegsquad

Look at the sad puppy. :(

Originally posted by dickgecko

They have the true myth, legend, the baddest bitch of them all Kisa/Santanico Pandemonium:

Originally posted by dealingdreams

Originally posted by culturevape

Originally posted by carmuxi

Originally posted by katesfuller

I’m so gay for her.

They have a true compassionate, caring person who’s selfless and it is shown not said (I’m talking about you Elena “You’re compassion is a gift” bullshit ass crybaby Gilbert):

Originally posted by kendrasaunders

Originally posted by qeckosfuller

Originally posted by qeckosfuller

And she cares about her brother (Not that I can say the same for you Elena):

Originally posted by lorelailukes

Speaking of you have her badass handsome brother who’s not a major crybaby, and did I mention he kicks ass!:

Originally posted by zane-daddy-holtz

Originally posted by qeckosfuller

Originally posted by grounderbellamy-archive

Jeremy Gilbert did deserve better, but…he annoyed the shit out of me.

They have a cool, awesome, diabolical, actually funny, sexy villain:

Originally posted by duskgifs

Originally posted by lenaluthar

Originally posted by qeckosfuller

Si papi ;)

Originally posted by duskgifs

They have intimidating, scary, and cool villains:

Originally posted by katesfuller

Originally posted by katesfuller

Originally posted by bobodelrey

Originally posted by qeckosfuller

At least they kept the villains as villains, and didn’t give them cheesy ass sob stories to make us sympathize with them. 

They have a badass hunter called “The Peacekeeper”:

Originally posted by thekingroan

Originally posted by preachersdaughtersthief

Originally posted by norman-reedus

Originally posted by bobbimorxe

Take that Alaric.

Not to mention they did an awesome Hell storyline that was actually done right,(And you got a chance to learn about the whole “end of the world” prediction in another culture) and we had a badass awesome demon that will truly bring Hell on Earth:

Originally posted by katiemcgrat

Originally posted by duskgifs

Originally posted by buffyangelus

Originally posted by qeckosfuller

Originally posted by qeckosfuller

Originally posted by geckofullers

Originally posted by emilybuttrickards

So Cade, Sybil, and Seline can all kiss Amaru’s ass and bow down to her the true Queen of Hell because she was da bomb!

Last but not least, the Culbera’s (basically Mexican vampires) can kick the “vampires” (if that’s what they are anymore. I mean seriously the show doesn’t even treat them like vampires anymore they treat them like people who happen to drink blood. They literally stop acting like vampires!) from Vampire Diaries ass any fucking day of the week:

Oh, and by the way….

Originally posted by natasharomanoff

Originally posted by qeckosfuller

Originally posted by bobbimorxe

Originally posted by dailygeckobros

Originally posted by qeckosfuller

Originally posted by thewinterdisaster

I had to do it. But seriously guys check this show out you won’t be disappointed. This show is amazing and has kickass vampires (well culberas), and has awesome characters and villains that are not hyped up just so they can be a let down. Check it out!

Religion is Complicated

gif is not mine

Title: Religion is Complicated

Pairing: Lucifer x Reader

Word Count: 1,583

Warnings: angst, and small amounts of fluff

A/N: This was requested by an anon! I hope you all enjoy Satan Sunday <3 <3 Feedback is welcomed and appreciated! I love you all so much! <3

The rain pelted your clothes as you sat on the curb outside your house.  You weren’t sure where you were going to go.  Your family had always been strict with their religion and their rules.  You didn’t mean to upset them with your opinion.  Apparently having an opinion was earned in your home.  You realized this a little too late.

Tears streamed down your face as you sat in the rain.  It didn’t matter what happened, you now had nowhere to live, nowhere to eat, and nowhere to bathe.  This had to be one of the worst days of your life.

“Religion can be so complicated,” an unfamiliar voice uttered, as a tall man towered over you.  His hair was blond and his eyes were blue.  He was wearing jeans and a brown shirt with a green over shirt on top of it.  “I broke too many rules once.  My father kicked me out too.”

Keep reading

personal favorite parts of the literature classic, “my immortal”

  • “dumblydore”
  • sometimes its “ebony” sometimes it’s “enoby”
  • how most of the characters changed their names and went to slytherin
  • (geddit cuz im goffik)
  • like three (3) characters turned out to be adopted and their real parents were vampires but they got killed and now they’re goffik
  • “c-r-o-s-s (there’s no way i’m saying that)”
  • when enoby says that draco can get cut on his wrists and be fine because he’s a vampire but then a few paragraphs later he dies from cutting his wrists but then he’s fine
  • “raven do you know where my sweater i”
  • that part where vampire potter had his scar changed to a pentagram but then it goes back to a lightning bolt
  • ^ the fact that this part was put in the story twice
  • “he put his thingie into my you-know-what”
  • that part where enoby goes to hell and becomes a prep for eternity
  • "pentagram” used to describe a cross between goffik singers
  • “you look kawaii, bitch”
  • the detailed descriptions of enoby’s clothes