Dean held a cup of hot coffee, his fingers wrapped lazily around the white mug as he raised it to his lips and took a small sip of the dark drink. It burned for a second, but then it turned into a bittersweet taste good enough to pass through his throat. It was a calm morning, at least for now.
Your word was elongated by a yawn, and yet it sounded as pleasant as ever to Dean. A small smirk pulled at his lips as he tore his eyes away from the cup and to you instead, watching you rub your eyes with your knuckles as you padded into the kitchen. You turned your back to him as you searched for a glass to pour orange juice in, as it was a daily routine for you.
“Morning,” he echoed, eyes trailing your still half-asleep form try to reach the glass on one of the shelves of the kitchen. “Do you need some help with that?”
“I’ve got it,” you smiled, carefully standing on your toes and outstretching your arm as far as you could; however, that did not seem to cooperate with you.
“Here,” Dean chuckled lightly, coming up behind you and reaching for the glass.
You struggled to contain a small gasp as his chest pressed against your back, a rosy blush blossoming in your cheeks with the contact. You glanced back at Dean with a nervous smile, quickly looking away as his amused eyes met yours.
“Thank you,” you muttered quietly, grasping the cup he was still holding before scurrying towards the fridge and begging your brain to turn off the heat in your face.
The orange juice, as always, remained on the middle of the fridge, just waiting for you to grab it. But your fingers barely touched the cool container before the oldest Winchester spoke again, effectively distracting you.
“So, did you have a good dream last night?” he asked casually, a hint of smugness lazed in his words.
Your eyes widened, your breathing stopping for a second as you took in his small comment. You closed the fridge without even taking out the orange juice, the beverage already forgotten as other images invaded your mind. You knew how you had woken up, and you immediately knew what he must have heard.
“It wasn’t what you think it was,” you said drily, not meeting his eyes in fear that he would see the tears forming in your own.
Dean, not realizing what you meant, walked calmly towards you, stopping when he was less than a foot away. You bit the inside of your cheek as he placed on hand on your hip, remembering the agonizing feeling you had felt in your nightmare when you thought he would never touch you again.
“Really? Then what was it?” You shook your head, your eyes firmly on the ground as you heard the cockiness roll off Dean’s voice. “C’mon, Y/N, I won’t mind.”
“I saw you die.”
The simple statement changed the air instantly, and you felt Dean’s hand leaving your hip in surprise. You finally glanced up, tears falling onto your cheeks as you looked into Dean’s light green eyes, thinking of the blankness you had illusioned just a few hours ago.
“I-I had a nightmare, Dean,” you whispered, watching the pain that contorted his face, his smugness fading away in the blink of an eye. “A-and you—you died in it and I couldn’t do anything about it, I just couldn’t.”
You hadn’t registered that you were shaking until Dean wrapped his arms around you, holding you firmly against his chest as you cried. Your hands gripped the material of his shirt tightly, afraid of letting him go.
Dean felt in a trace as he took you in, never for a second considering the other possibilities to what he had heard you yell the night before. He wanted to slap himself for not realizing that he should have checked on you, just as a precaution. And now, thinking about how scared you could’ve been, all alone and denying the thought of possibly ever telling him about what had happened without him asking about it…it killed him.
“I’m s-sorry,” you whimpered, your eyes closed tightly as the tears continued to roll on your cheeks, but Dean shook his head, instead kissing your forehead and holding you even tighter.
“You shouldn’t be the one apologizing; I should’ve checked on you, Y/N…I-I just…I never even considered…” Dean let out a sigh, kissing you again. “I’m sorry, baby girl, I am so sorry.”