read it really fast

Throwback to the 2nd ever MM fanart I did with this…because I find it highly relevant right now.

5

this… is so self indulgent,, but… i’m thinking about the bad end of jfa again…

(not shipping)

EDIT: the bad end of jfa is an *innocent* verdict; this is a scenario in which franziska never comes to save the day! sorry for any misunderstandings

also idk why people are saying the team doesnt care about keiths wellbeing or rejected him? like keith wasnt focused on voltron because he was too busy focusing on the blade of marmora. they were angry at him which is understandable, even though we know keith’s motivations, the others don’t, but they weren’t rejecting him at all. allura literally said that the team needs him and he still went away. shiro tried to keep him focused on voltron, but he didn’t want to. keith hates being the leader/the black paladin, he wasn’t happier in that position which was obvious from season 3.

keith is obviously going through something right now, but it’s not the team’s fault because keith said that he didn’t want to be a leader and (clone) shiro ignored him and his wants. he didn’t go to anyone else, and made a choice he thought would be best. during season 3 he got comfort and the team was literally upset that he was leaving but weren’t going to force him to stay because they learned that lesson in season 1 when pidge wanted to leave. the team loves him, and it’s not their fault that keith’s in a bad place mentally. they don’t know he nearly killed himself without a second thought because they were literally trying not to die at the same time. i just hope someone figures it out or keith confesses he’s struggling before it gets worse.

you know that feeling when you haven’t read harry potter in a really long time because life is moving so fast and things are so crazy and the pile of books to be read is growing larger by the minute and you have homework and class and work and the moment you’re done with it all you go straight to bed but like…… for one special moment you get a break and you take a harry potter book off your bookshelf and open the first page and you just feel….. calm all of a sudden like everything else just kind of floats away? yeah i love that

Random Headcanons for TFP

I can’t answer asks or work on commissions right now, but I can do this.

Ratchet has terrible handwriting, Cybertronian or otherwise. It’s just really fast chicken scratch and most people can’t read it.

Bumblebee learned sign language from Raf because it seemed like fun.

Smokescreen was very clumsy as a sparkling and that can still be found now. Such as tripping over his own pedes when he’s walking or running into things around the base, does not translate into his fighting.

Optimus really loves learning the languages of Earth, without downloading them. So far is fluent in Spanish, French, and German and conversational in Japanese, Korean, and Russian.

Bulkhead is afraid of picking up a brush and being artistic due to… Events.

Arcee might have been a dancer on Cybertron, specifically a Cybertronian form of Belly Dancing.

Ultra Magnus spends a lot of ‘free time’ after being told they’re a family watching family movies to understand.

Wheeljack really loves country music, specifically stuff with a fiddle in it. Absolutely wants to learn how to play the fiddle.

Knockout does a sort of vent that sounds like a snort when he laughs too hard, hates it and will be embarrassed for the next millennia.

Starscream watches model shows, like America’s Next Top Model and the like, even shows about making clothing. It’s the one thing he thinks humans are actually good at. Definitely where he learned to strut his stuff.

Breakdown really likes animals, all kinds. He knows he shouldn’t, but they’re so cute and small he can’t help it. Used to try and bring home random animals. Knockout had to stop him.

Soundwave, obviously, likes dubstep, but he secretly likes heavy metal like Black Sabbath. It’s a guilty pleasure. Would kill someone if they found out.

Megatron has the same interest in language as Optimus, but only learns to read them and comprehend speech. He has no interest in learning Earth languages.

Dreadwing likes Disney movies, especially Moana, a strong warrior with strong loyalty to her people. If anyone found out he will kill them

Shockwave watches Bill Nye, not just the Science Guy show, but all the other stuff he puts out. Gets notified anytime something new appears from him and listens to it while working.

dad!mingyu

Originally posted by hanwooz

this concept has, does, and will forever internally Scar Me. read at ur own risk…..

  • also this got really real super fast hang in there reader
  • mingyu and mijoo
  • mijoo and mingyu
  • they met at recess on the first day of 4th grade 
  • when mijoo fell down and scraped her knee from a rock on the grass hill overlooking the school
  • and mingyu heard her voice like a chime of a bell
  • and ran to the source of it, careless of who it belonged to 
  • until he found her, crouching over her leg, wiping away tears and smoothening out her bangs
  • the first thing he thought was 
  • aw, there’s a girl crying, i should help her 
  • the second was 
  • she is the most beautiful thing i’ve ever seen
  • so he walked over to her, ignoring the slamming of his heart against his chest
  • plucked a wildflower amongst a hundred of them, sat down in front of her, tucked her hair behind her ear,
  • and placed the flower right behind it
  • mijoo looked up through her wet lashes to face the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen with a smile so kind she forgot why the scrape on her knee hurt so much 
  • from then on, the two were absolutely inseparable!! 
  • little mingoo would pluck her a bouquet of wildflowers every year for her birthday until they were 14 and he finally realized that he’s aLLERGIC TO THE WILDFLOWERS JFC MINGYU
  • went through the puberty stages together like pimples yes growth pains yes awkward pants that would rise above the ankles yes hormones yes first crushes yes and puberty YES
  • both miraculously got hot in high school and went on to date several people but still maintained their close close close friendship
  • they shared their hopes and their goals and their dreams with each other 
  • mijoo had always wanted a job in animation and art, and mingyu was extremely talented and hopeful in a career in business 
  • mijoo had a job working for a company that illustrated children’s books, and early that senior year, mingyu found a position in his co-operative education at one of the biggest financial investment companies in the city
  • both had unlimited potential and shared every moment of it with each other
  • tbh best friends probs wasn’t even the right term to describe it like 
  • they were just lovers but without the lust 
  • but honestly since the very first day they saw each other 
  • they already knew 
  • that they were somehow meant to be together
  • mingyu was the first to realize it one day, lying in bed, taking a nap with best friend wonwoo at the desk next to the bed 
  • when the realization smacked mingyu in the face, like fuck am i in love with her?
  • and bolted up so hard he banged his wrist against wonwoo’s desk, spilling his coffee all over his textbook and spraining his own wrist
  • death stares from wonwoo
  • non-stop pestering to his 12 best friends
  • “guys i think i’m in love with her”
  • “do i tell her??” 
  • “WHAT’S LOVE HOW DO I KNOW I’M IN LOVE IF I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT IT IS”
  • “guys what do i do”
  • “guys i think i’m in love with her”
  • “guys i’m scared”
  • “guys what do i do”
  • “gu–”
  • “mingyu, juST OIFDJGSOIDFGJSDOIFGJSDJFGO”
  • ^ probably wonwoo/minghao
  • mingyu was convinced it was just him feeling this way, bc why else would he have had the urge to place that wildflower behind her ear in the first place??
  • it was just a one-sided crush, he reminded himself everyday. it’ll go away.
  • until one day 
  • class president!jisoo decided on the last day of senior year 
  • to throw a party for all the seniors
  • “jisoo??? is throwing the party???”
  • “i thought he was all a jesus??? button the top button??? good christian type?? boy??”
  • “i can hEAR YOU SOONYOUNG”
  • everyone was surprised it was jisoo but he promised that it would just be drinks, some nice music, and mingling 
  • well that night mijoo wanted to have fun and made sure mingyu was there to watch over her 
  • so she tooks shots
  • and shots and shots 
  • SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS im sorr ry 
  • and drank way more than she absolutely should have for someone her size 
  • mingyu honestly was having a good time himself and didn’t seem to think mijoo needed that much support, since she never was that big of a party-er
  • until by a little over one am he found her stretched out on the bathroom floor, head over the toilet, heaving out her guts 
  • he held her hair back and brushed her teeth in jisoo’s sink before realizing it was probably a good idea to drive her home 
  • on the drive home, she was still absolutely drunk and began to say things that would then change his life forever
  • “hey mingyu”
  • “yes mijoo”
  • “you’re a really good friend”
  • “thanks i know”
  • “… and i think i’m in love with you”
  • BOY DAMN NEAR RAN INTO A TREE 
  • he had a million questions
  • until it hit him that she was drunk 
  • and it probably meant she didn’t mean a single word 
  • so for the rest of the ride to her house, his head was rigid on his shoulders and stared at the dark road ahead, ignoring the flustered, rosy-cheeked, warm and utterly beautiful girl sitting in his passenger seat 
  • who he’s been in love with since he was nine and who had just drunkenly and stupidly confessed her love back
  • his knuckles were turning white 
  • but before he broke the poor steering wheel in half, he made it to her house and quickly went over to her side of the door before the poor girl accidentally opened it herself and fell through it
  • she landed into the crook of his arms and he couldn’t help but feel that she fit there perfectly 
  • and somehow the two of them were able to maintain their balance to walk up the steps and onto the porch 
  • he unlocked her door with her key and led her up the stairs to her bedroom
  • the entire house was dark and the doors to her parents’ and sisters’ rooms were closed, implying they weren’t even home 
  • which made mingyu even more scared bc that would mean he would have to stay behind and take care of her and make sure she’s ok in her sleep
  • until they reach the doorway of her bed when she turned around and looked at him dead in the eye
  • it was fascinating to mingyu how the mere sight of her could send him buckling down to his knees at her feet 
  • those flustered cheeks, shining eyes, messy hair and rosy lips drew him in and he found himself unable to look away
  • “will… will you stay?” 
  • her words were clear and coordinated, sounding sure in itself, as if she wasn’t the same girl that was barely able to stumble up the four steps to her porch 
  • he must’ve taken a long time to process her words, and when he did, and was about to say yes ofc you dummy i have to take care of you 
  • she leaned on her tip toes and capture his lips in hers
  • as if that wasn’t enough, every ounce of his self control and pride shredded to pieces when she swiped her tongue across, whimpered and pulled away, whispering a barely audible, “please.” 
  • mingyu felt his world fall apart and piece back together all in a mere second and had no hesitation making his decision
  • whispering back a barely audible, “i love you”, which she undoubtedly heard, though he’d thought she hadn’t, he reattached his lips back onto hers and led her inside the room, blocking out the world on the outside of the door 
  • that night was spent rushed and hasty the first time and slow and calculating the others, all the while never forgetting to whisper his new favourite words in her ear whenever she wanted to hear it 
  • weeks pass after that night and everyone is thrilled the two hottest seniors finally “got their head out of their ass and confessed”
  • “thank u for that seungcheol” 
  • some more weeks pass 
  • and mijoo, currently in a happy place she’d never imagined possible before, began to notice changes in her body
  • stretch marks began to show on her toned thighs, she’d feel extreme discomfort on the treadmill at the gym after just 30 minutes of cardio, her eating habits began to change, she’d notice significant weight change and always seemed to be moody
  • she shared these abnormalities with her sister 
  • and mid-sentence discussing the eating habits, she froze and nearly fell to her knees
  • there was no way 
  • and as she feared, later that night, at her kitchen table with her boyfriend, clueless and munching on some pretzels, whiffing through a magazine, she slid the pregnancy test across the table, stood up, and walked upstairs 
  • it took him a second 
  • until he realized what the two lines meant
  • 19 years of age
  • and both of them were going to be parents 
  • he dropped every single item in his hand that clattered to the table before turning and speeding up the stairs two steps at a time to her room to find her on her knees, crying
  • his initial reaction was to freak out, of course 
  • what 19-year-old was ready to have kids? 
  • the money, fuck, the housing, their parents, the delivery; there were too many things to consider
  • but as he saw her there, crouching and crying and afraid 
  • he felt that he couldn’t be like that too
  • what world would this child be born into if neither of their parents wanted them? 
  • he slowly bent down to her and cupped her face, wiping away the tears with the pads of his thumbs and promised every single promise he could’ve possibly come up with 
  • he had to protect her and the child she was carrying 
  • so for the next few months mingyu did absolutely everything he could to be prepared 
  • thought of names, bought extra food in case of cravings, read books on the changes in a woman’s body during and after childbirth, sex during a pregnancy bc bOI
  • started taking double shifts at this office job he found downtown now that mijoo stopped working 
  • breaking news to the parents was difficult 
  • mingyu’s was a tad more supportive but mijoo’s were absolutely appalled and refused to acknowledge mingyu any longer 
  • mingyu didn’t know how he was able to go on, but he forced himself to 
  • until the day came around for their first ultrasound
  • and just as mingyu was searching for a healthy pair of two hands and two feet
  • he found… four?
  • his breath was cut short when the doctor turned to them, beaming
  • “well, mijoo, looks like you guys are parents to twins”
  • the doctor announced boy and girl twins, and upon hearing the news and figuring out what the two figures were, mingyu began jumping up and down in joy and was almost in the verge of tears 
  • only to look down on the ultrasound bed to see his girlfriend staring at the monitor 
  • in utter despair and fear 
  • mijoo had already been disappointed by the initial pregnancy, knowing nothing good comes out of being a young mom and she had to now put her dreams on hold
  • but now expenses were going to be doubled 
  • clothing, food, beds, chairs, toys, everything had to be more
  • it wasn’t until the third trimester of the pregnancy that it really  got difficult for the two of them 
  • they had to move in with mingyu’s parents, much to mijoo’s parents’ dismay, so his mother could help out 
  • they would go to bed together every night 
  • to mingyu waking up at 3am each time to see her back to him, shaking and silently weeping 
  • she would slowly avoid his embraces when the two of them spent time together 
  • mingyu noticed these, but still did his best to put a smile on his face every morning and face the hatred from her parents and the coldness from his own girlfriend 
  • so smiling and staying positive turned into breaking down into sobs and clutching his chest on the bathroom floor at 2am when the epiphany of how difficult it was going to be would hit him 
  • the babies were born during spring break, in march
  • mingyu held the two in his arms, the boy now named jiho and the girl now named jiyoung, and suddenly felt as if the mental breakdowns in his bathtub and desperately running to the convenience store across the street for mijoo’s cravings before she went insane were maybe worth it after all 
  • around the two month mark, mingyu noticed the actions of mijoo came back
  • would immediately toss the crying children to mingyu and bolted from the room, panicking and in fear of not knowing how to console her own children 
  • would nudge mingyu awake when wailing started coming from the other room at 5am 
  • often found herself frustrated with the kids when they wouldn’t follow her instructions and as the months went by
  • she just didn’t know how to connect, and of course, being two young parents, neither of them knew that this was a form of post partum depression
  • when the kids were 9 months old, mingyu awoke to the sound of jiyoung desperately wailing and jiho whimpering beyond belief 
  • went to the kitchen to find a single note that was written in a handwriting he learned to memorize every curve and swipe of 
  • “we would’ve gotten married in another lifetime, you know. tell the kids i’m sorry. i know i just have to do this. i love you forever, my mingyu. - mijoo.”
  • and that was it 
  • she left him 
  • the love of his life, the mother of his children 
  • gone 
  • he walked up the stairs to the sound of the crying, but went past the room with the kids, knowing he couldn’t face them right now 
  • he opened the door to his parents room, now sitting up and sleepily wiping their eyes, confused why the kids were crying so early in the day
  • with the note still in his hand and his life shattered, he climbed into his parents’ bed like he was a child and wept in his mom’s arms
  • now breakdowns in the washroom turn to openly crying as he rocks both wailing babies in his arms trying to get them to bed
  • work turns into taking so many extra shifts his body fails to support him and he just sleeps on his keyboard in his little cubicle sometimes 
  • but his parents take the kids to the village or other relaxing, vacation places at the end of every month and on every holiday so they have a chance to experience things like other kids do 
  • uncle soonyoung and uncle seungcheol always offer to babysit and look after the kids until dusk if mingyu is running behind at work, trying to pick up as many hours and money as he possibly could 
  • uncle wonwoo becomes their favourite uncle 
  • uncle jeonghan always brings by takeout whenever the fridge is out of food 
  • uncle seungkwan IS ALWAYS BULLIED 
  • “MINGYU U NEED TO GET UR ASS HOME THEY’RE LITERALLY HOLDING SEUNGKWAN HOSTAGE”
  • before mingyu could even calculate it, the years go by and it’s time for preschool, which his parents helped to pitch in for to get them into a good one 
  • and for the first time in a long time, mingyu realizes things have actually been going ok and he wasn’t in this completely alone
  • his best friends and his parents and sister never failed to remind him of that
  • he’s been spending much more time alone with them ever since he became a single dad and have learned to understand and connect with his kids
  • the older twin, named jiho, was the definition of warm
  • the easiest baby on the face of the earth, would eat anything he had to, never fussed as much as most babies would, would sleep all through the night, giggled at anything that moved, and loves his papa beyond words
  • the girl twin, jiyoung, was a little more boisterous than that
  • would flip her food and laugh a huge belly laugh just seeing the look of despair on her dad’s face
  • loved causing trouble and smacking her brother in the face but pretending to be cute when her dad scolds her 
  • the two complimented each other well and mingyu didn’t even realize when he became the dad that would be so typical so and gushy and smile at the way they interacted with one another as he just stands in the doorway and watches them 
  • so first day of preschool begins
  • did i mention mingyu also happens to be the stylish father on the face of the earth
  • ever see those videos of dads struggling to braid his daughter’s hair 
  • or not knowing what to dress his kid 
  • nOT KIM MINGYU NOPE 
  • fucking dutch braids his daughter’s hair
  • puts his son in a dress shirt and nice sweater over 
  • they roll into school looking like they actually have their shit together
  • when actually
  • mingyu woke up 45 minutes late and foRGOT THEY HAD SCHOOL EVEN THOUGH HE’S BEEN HYPING IT UP FOR A WEEK IT LITERALLY JUST SLIPPED HIS MIND 
  • didn’t even brush his teeth and just fucking bursted into the kids room 
  • to find them already up and cleaned, waiting for their outfits of the day
  • and mingyu just sighs of relief like why are my kids smarter than i am 
  • but yes preschool
  • NOW HERE COMES YOU 
  • sorry that took such a long time here we go 
  • you’re the homeroom teacher for the kids and this is ur third year of teaching, yet somehow, the first days still give u the butterflies
  • so u wait patiently behind ur desk, going through the plan for the day, meeting the parents and such, and trying to calm your nerves
  • and hoped that the school year would turn out good 
  • you wondered about the kids in ur class
  • you wondered about the good ones, the ones that always greeted you through the door and never peed themselves
  • you wondered about the bad ones, the ones that LITERALLY used you as a canvas for their painting 
  • you wondered about the parents and how the crop each year keeps getting scarier and scarier–
  • “ah-cHOO”
  • “sh, dad, you’re way too loud”
  • “oh…. .. .. SORRY,… whispers …. hi there!”
  • your thoughts are interrupted when you see three figures walk into the doorway, two kids around the same height and a towering young man in a dress shirt and some nice jeans and converse
  • immediately your first thought was that wow he seemed so young??? and the kids looked like carbon copies of him so they’re absolutely his kids
  • and you were about to say something, but suddenly and uncontrollably
  • you just bursted out laughing
  • and the little girl and boy both tilted their heads to the side at the same time adorably, looking at you weird 
  • and sputtering and trying to catch ur breath, you were like
  • “ahah ahh why–why are you whispering?” 
  • it didn’t hit you until 2 secs later that that was .. … so …. Embarrassing…
  • you could’ve introduced urself but u just cackled like nice going y/n nice nice 
  • the father just turned a dark hue of red before rubbing his neck and gave a smile so shy you suddenly began to feel redness in ur neck as well
  • but u cleared ur throat and introduced urself regardless
  • “hi there! i’m y/n and i’ll be the homeroom teacher for classroom 4A this year!!”
  • mingyu led the two into the room, the girl strutting and smiling in awe at every single colour around in the room and the boy shyly hiding halfway behind his dad’s leg
  • “this,” he pointed to the girl, already picking up crayons and a paper, “is jiyoung. she’s… quite boisterous”
  • “and this,” he pointed to the boy, “is jiho, who’s a little bit more shy but i promise, will never cause you trouble,” patting his head lovingly
  • and he looks up at you, “and i’m mingyu, their dad!” and extended his hand 
  • you feel your breath catch in ur throat because wow
  • what a beautiful thing in front of ur eyes rn 
  • reaching out to shake ur hand
  • and smiling so kindly 
  • rip reader
  • so you shake it and only days after, when u were folding laundry at home with some reality tv show in the background, replaying that iconic moment over and over, that you suddenly recall
  • … didn’t he sneeze directly into his hand that time????
  • ANYWHO
  • he explained how he sometimes has work shifts that could possibly stretch a little later than the time the school closes on weekdays, so either his parents or sister will pick him up 
  • “OR UNCLE WONWOO!!!” jiyoung adds from the background
  • and you tell him it’s absolutely fine and you won’t even mind staying behind just to make sure the kids are rested before they’re picked up if it comes down to the last resort and no one can pick him up 
  • and if u thought his smile was kind before
  • bro
  • u aint seen dis one 
  • cause this one started from his eyes
  • they glistened for a quick second before he looked down shyly
  • then back up at you, canines flashing and eyes shimmering, almost astounded at your response
  • as if he was relieved and grateful somehow
  • and from the way you see the dark circles under his eyes and the quick, messy push of his hair from getting ready this morning, to him later being the only father at the orientation and sneaking in funny faces at his twins sitting in the front row, to him reading through each and every sentence in the pamphlet of the curriculum for the kids you gave it, you had an abnormal itch to ask him about more 
  • but knew that you couldn’t bc it would be rude 
  • so thats how you meet kim mingyu, father of kim jiho and kim jiyoung of classroom 4A 
  • so from then on, for the first week, though you learn to practice names and memorize likes, dislikes, tendencies, and personalities of the girls and boys in your class, your mind keeps drifting off to the tall, young boy that, because of his kids, was seemingly way beyond his years 
  • and for all but one, you are met every single day after school for months by a rushing mingyu in his office attire and dangling briefcase, always almost out of breath, there to pick his kids up without remembering to thank you a million times first 
  • and as he waits for the other teachers to assist the kids with their jackets and backpacks, you guys always have these 1-minute conversations 
  • “so how were they today?” 
  • “they were good! jiho, as usual, had the cleanest painting of all”
  • “that’s my boy!”
  • “and jiyoung actually tried to hit on this boy named namhyuk today during rece–”
  • “sh E WHA T”
  • leans on the gate too hard and falls through straight onto the floor 
  • and somehow scrambles up to pick up the kids, now dressed and ready and confused why their dad is freaking out and flat on the floor 
  • scoops both of them up in both his arms, walks towards his car after shouting a “goodBYE Y/N I HAVE BUSINESS TO TAKE CARE OF”
  • and starts lecturing jiyoung as they make their way to the car
  • “whyareyoualreadyhittingonboysyoureliterallytheeyearsoldifanythingtheyshouldbehittingonyouandyoushouldntbedoinganythingthatiscatchingtheirattentionnodatingandnoboysuntilyouturnlikethirtydoyouunDERSTANDmeyounglady”
  • and almost everyday is a spectacle for you, whether it be him putting on his best effort to scold jiyoung for accidentally writing on the board in permanent marker or when jiho, in an effort to be nice, wanted to lick his deskmate’s face to “help him get the crayon mark off”
  • but a few weeks after that, you were informed that work had become extra busy and it was his sister, minseo, or best friend, wonwoo, that would come by and pick them up 
  • and you havent seen mingyu in a while 
  • but you kind of just brush it off 
  • cause it’s stupid crush on a parent that just happens to be attractive and freaking adorable with his kids ugh 
  • until its friday night and you were feeling sick so had to call in for that day
  • and after a whole day spent of wheezing and coughing and sweating and sleeping, you dragged ur ass to the grocery store to make some stew bc god u needed it 
  • and u walk into the canned aisle to find some spam to put into the stew
  • when ur face to face with 
  • a human ladder
  • and you see
  • mingyu with jiho stacked on top of him and jiyoUNG ON TOP OF JIHO
  • AND YOU SCREAM IN SHOCK BC OMG MINGYU BUT ALSO OMG PLS DONT FALL AND DIE 
  • and they just look over at you so freaking casually and ??? until !!! IT’S MS. Y/N!!!
  • AND YOU’RE LIKE OMG PLS DONT FALL BE CAREFUL
  • and mingyu can’t even say anything back 
  • bc little did you know 
  • after a few weeks of being caught up in so many shifts,
  • he came today to pick up his twins to find you not there 
  • but guess what today was 
  • valentine’s day
  • and guess what he was holding
  • fLOWERS 
  • and he promised himself it was just a gift from the kids to her and nOTHING ELSE 
  • so when he hung his mouth open, speechless and stuttering, jiyoung just rolled her eyes at her obviously pathetic, crush-ridden dad and explained
  • “dont worry miss!! we do this all the time!! jiho just really wanted some canned beans, but they always stack it way too high for us”
  • you were still concerned but saw jiho nod at you, so you knew that if he approved, it was all good LOL
  • so you were like phew ok!!!
  • mingyu gets himself together after putting the kids down and finally says hi to you
  • and tries to suavely, casually, coolly be like
  • “so, ahem, um, why weren’t you, you know, at school today… yeah?”
  • behind the rack of ranch dip jiho just sighs and jiyoung facepalms 
  • you explain you haven’t been feeling well and just needed some time to rest
  • until he was like oh so you’re not doing anything for valentine’s day??
  • and you just blank
  • bc omg you forgot???
  • and you’re both just standing there awkwardly, absorbed in your own thoughts of each other, until jiyoung bursts in with her fucking superhero cape and is like 
  • “hey, ms. y/n, how about you come over for dinner tonight!! you’re not feeling well so you shouldn’t cook”
  • and you immediately want to decline bc you’re also a .. .. . huge eater… … and kim mingyu must never ever ever ever see that side of you 
  • until mingyu lights up and nods his head like an overexcited puppy, going, “yes yes! come! my parents are out of town and i’m a pretty good co–” and then realizes what he could’ve meant when he says his parents are out of town
  • “i MEAN EVEN IF MY PARENTS WERE HOME YOU COULD STILL COME OVEVR YOU KNOW like it’s just the house would be quieter and we can be as loud as we want wHAT I M EAN”
  • “dad pls just . .. .”
  • and you’re doubled over laughing once more at the antics of the kims, until little jiho tugs on the sleeve of your sweater and shoots you those puppy eyes
  • and you know you can’t decline 
  • so that’s how you ended up in the kitchen of the mingyu household 
  • and witnessed the most amazing sight you’ve ever seen
  • jiyoung was propped up on a chair, reaching for the bowls and opening drawers for utensils before neatly climbing down and setting them on the dinner table
  • and jiho was sitting on the counter beside his dad, helping sort vegetables, choose ingredients and gigging at his dad’s occasional vegetable puns
  • “hey, jiho, what is green and sings? elvis PARSLEY”
  • i just fucking cant w kim mingyu
  • but mingyu
  • mingyu
  • if you hadn’t admitted your crush on him then, you cerTAINLY FUCKING DID NOW 
  • with an apron tied neatly in the back by jiyoung and his sleeves rolled up by jiho (can u imagine so f uck ign cut ete), he worked with hands so fast and diligent you began to just drown in the sight of him 
  • and noticed how this entire family worked like a well-oiled, loving machine
  • he beckoned you to come over and try some 
  • and you actually hate it when people feed u like god gave me hands pls allow me to use them thx 
  • but the sight of him holding a ladle in one hand and his eyes hopeful and excited for you to try his cooking, all pet peeves went out the window
  • it took you a sec before the taste sunk in and oh my lord
  • it was incredible???
  • you gushed and exclaimed how he could honestly be a chef
  • but he blushed and laughed softly to himself, and just shook his head, almost with a dash of sadness in there 
  • meanwhile the twins sit at the dinner table watching all this unfold and giggling and covering their mouths like omgogmgogmogm
  • and it wasn’t until when dinner was almost served when you realized a missing presence that a loving family like this would usually have
  • you were curious about the twins’ mother, and not that it made a difference with how you saw them whatsoever, but it had been a question you’d been dying to ask for months 
  • but knew you couldn’t, not yet at least 
  • and all through dinner, there was always a buzz of conversation, laughter, and swooning over mingyu’s cooking, which he always bashfully accepted
  • you noticed how jiyoung had her dad’s laugh, true and open, honest and delightful, baring all her teeth and eyes lighting up 
  • she also had a light to her that turned her dad to putty in front of her, and you saw a prediction that this girl has so much to offer to the world and her personality was one you prayed to all the gods will never fade out
  • jiho had his dad’s kindness, always offering to grab u a napkin or some more lemon for your pork 
  • he had the dashing and gentleman-like demeanour, always wanting to contribute to things as an act of kindness, helping others, and keeping his actions in check
  • it was strange to you that these kids were barely full grown kids at all, yet their personalities shone so brightly in front of their father that when the kids were sent upstairs to brush their teeth and change into jammies for a movie then bedtime, you blurted out as you were helping drying the dishes
  • “are you married?”
  • you hadn’t meant for it to come out so abrupt, but mingyu didn’t look surprised as he looked over at you and gave a small smile
  • he helped you finish drying the last few plates before taking two glasses of water and bringing them out to the living room couch, gesturing you to sit down 
  • he sighed before he began, “as my children’s teacher and now as someone i consider a friend, i think it’s the right time to tell you”
  • and proceeded to recall his childhood best friend with her radiant smile and demanding strut of her step
  • he talked about them sharing their first kiss stories with each other and secretly, subconsciously hoping that they could’ve somehow been each other’s
  • he described her with such a fervor and light that made ur skin tingle, because wow, is that what love really feels like?
  • he then went on to tell about the night he realized he loved her, to the night when she drunkenly told him she loved him too 
  • and that that was also the night that would change his life forever 
  • he recalled how her pregnancy was extremely difficult and that she couldn’t even bare to look at him some days
  • and finally, with strength, he pulled to the last chapter, recalling the morning she left him a single note and left without a trace to a world where him and the kids no longer existed to her 
  • of course at the time, he explained, there was no way he could’ve known that her post partum depression had drawn her away so hard, and really, if he could ever forgive her for leaving this life behind, as he said none of his close family and friends ever will
  • he also explained how difficult it was at first to support his family financially and morally, but is grateful for the love he’s received since 
  • for a while, the two of you were silent
  • you had no idea what to say, because what do you say to someone who became a dad to two as a teenager, had the mother of his children leave him by writing him a single sentence goodbye, and barely knew how to take care of himself at the time, let alone two others?
  • but as you both sat there in the silence, contemplating the moment that just passed you replied with
  • “do it.”
  • “what?”
  • “forgive her”
  • taken aback by your response, you continued
  • “of course, i’m not saying it was the right thing to do… but maybe it was meant to be this way, you know? what if this was just a way to teach you abt life beyond your own? what if, somehow, you were just dealt that card a little earlier than most? look where you are now. money’s coming back in, you have people who support you and will run to your aid whenever,” you look at him straight in the eye, “and you have two beautiful kids who are both just kind and clever and mature. maybe, you know, you being a father was your calling all along. maybe, just maybe, you three are a well-oiled machine for a reason.”
  • you can’t tell what those shimmering eyes were trying to say, but before you knew it, he placed both ur glasses on the table before grabbing the sides of your face and captured your lips  
  • because for the first time in the longest fucking time, he was heard 
  • for the first time in a long time, there was someone out there who was willing to take into account him, his lovely jiho and blazing jiyoung and count them all as a blessing, and truly, truly made him realize that life could be so hopeful
  • and you didn’t know if he was kissing you because he really desperately needed to hear those words, or if he honestly wanted to kiss you because he just really wanted to kiss you to subdue hiS DAMN CRUSH (hint: it’s this one), but you didn’t care
  • you kissed him back and you both moved in a rhythm so steady and passionate that when you pulled away and he dipped in, almost trying to catch your lips once more, both of you were red and panting and breathless and over the moon 
  • you also didn’t notice the two little ones peeking over the stair bannisters and almost squealing out of happiness and excitement bc their beautiful teacher!!! and their dad!!!! 
  • he rests his forehead on yours and just quietly mutters how thankful he is for someone like you and how, yes, maybe this is his goddamn calling after all
  • and you continue to stay on the couch to talk and steal touches and get close and bump noses and grab kisses in between sentences until you realize its midnight and you need to get home 
  • it wasn’t until you got up that you realized that you were confused as to what this could become
  • would you date? there was no way that would go anywhere for awhile though, knowing how wounds were still fresh for many parties involved here
  • but as you were putting on your shoes with his eyes on you, you looked up at him, ready to leave, and all those thoughts went out the window
  • he stole one more as ur fingernails bit into the skin of his biceps. sagged into his arms and let him, and his kiss, hold you up
  • it was a legendary, Princess Bride, top ten in history kind of kiss
  • “can i see you again soon?” he asked 
  • and u realized you had nothing to worry about at all 
  • bc as strange as it was, the way he was as a father and as a hardworking, passionate and resilient person was astonishing to you
  • so that night, when he finally let her go, he skipped two steps up the stairs to the twins’ room, to find them pretending to keep their eyes shut and smiles hidden
  • but mingyu fully knew and went, “come on, let me hear it!!”
  • and that unleashed the two loudest screams that could’ve woken up every elderly on the street
  • they leaped off their bunk bed and into his arms, bouncing with joy and excitement
  • jiyoung was smiling uncontrollably and jiho even had some tears in his eyes
  • after a little more dancing and embracing, he tucked them into bed one more time, promising saturday would be filled with lots of candy at the mall and coercing uncle jisoo to buy everything for them
  • he tucked jiyoung at the top bunk bed first, before doing their handshake (”slide, slide, fist bump, exPLOSION, snap, snap, swag”) and kissing each other good night
  • as he reached jiho, the boy already neatly and firmly slotted under his power rangers blanket, he sleepily beckoned his dad closer until they were nose to nose
  • he gave his dad a small kiss there, and whispered just as he drifted off, “daddy, can i ask you something?”
  • “yeah, of course, baby, what’s up?”
  • “i think… i finally want a mommy now.”
  • and drifted off
  • so when mingyu turned off the nightlight and walked into his own room, he leaned against the door, slid down against it and bursted into tears
  • happy, sad, relieved, afraid; he wasn’t sure 
  • but this was a new chapter now
  • a chapter where he maybe his kids will begin to need someone more than just him, and a chapter where finally, it can all become just a bit easier, step by step, slowly but surely

wooahhhhsodfkgdgf this was long. for those that don’t know, post-partum depression is a very serious mental disorder that depicts that detachment and abnormality of emotions between a mother and child following the birth. having a mother that has battled post-partum depression w the birth of myself, i thought it was important to bring light to it, and no matter how young or how afraid, help is always out there, and no mother or child should ever have to feel this way.

this honestly took a lot longer to write than i expected just bc it was a bit more angsty than what i normally write, and i purposely left the ending a little open so you all can decide the upcoming between the y/n, the twins and papa mingyu :)

enjoy, loves! xoxo 

also mingyu wanna like father?? my children??? thx??

What do you get when you mix Ford and Fiddleford and a dinosaur?

Pterodactylytron.

2

Me waiting for Old Xian to finish her next chapter of 19 Days that will hopefully focus on what happened after Zhan XiXi asked Jian Yi if he liked him but also I am anxious that Old Xian will laugh it off and push this plot moving moment away because she has never followed through with any of the love confessions in any or her work ever before and this could very well be another example of not following through with a cliffhanger, but I am also holding out hope that she will write a love confession scene where Jian and Zhan’s feelings are mutually exchanged because that would be the first time she’s ever done that with one of her manga, but it will also make tons of people happy to finally have a pair be visibly canonized in 19 Days. Also a kiss scene where Zhan doesn’t kick Jian’s ass right after would be nice.

Lmao but idk, fam. Lol.

Do you ever like have a reader’s block when you want to read something but you’ve already read everything you want to read, but you also want to read something new, but you don’t know what because you really want to read stuff you’ve already read but you also want to read new stuff but like really fast, as in you want a book to get over really quickly but you can’t find any book like that

anonymous asked:

I saw your BotW Asks are still open so can you maybe draw Zelda cutting her hair short (like to her shoulders) and Link is shocked but loves it (and maybe don't do this part but he decides to cut his hair too and messes it up so Zelda fixes it and cuts it more pretty short for him but it lowkey looks amazing) thanks :D

YES HAHA! 

This is actually from @rachaeltad-writes ‘s fic From the Ground Up. If you haven’t read it you should really give it a look! It’s really good, and i’m really excited to read the next chapter cuz it just came out >u> 

The Real Thing is Better // Yoongi

Pairing: Suga x Reader

Genre: fluff and mentions of sex

Word Count: 377

Summary: Your boyfriend, Suga catches you reading smut about him.


Suga’s hands roamed your body as his head dipped lower in between your legs. Suddenly, he licked a wet stripe up between your folds eliciting a moan from you.

“You’ve been a very bad girl, kitten” he growled.

Keep reading

Hidden Talents (part 1)

Prompt: Reader has a hidden talent
Fandom: Marvel
Note: I got this idea while listening to this random song on the radio so cheers to inspiration. Also, Spider-Man & Ant-Man have officially joined the Marvel Preferences team! If you’d like me to add anyone else, just let me know!

Scarlet Witch/Wanda Maximoff: [speed reading]

Originally posted by jorgey2j

You sat there on the couch, your eyes quickly scanning the page yet absorbing every word. You’ve had your nose shoved into a book for as long as you can remember, and eventually you learned to speed read. It came naturally, you never went looking for a faster way to read books. After a while, you managed to get through the Harry Potter series in less than a day, which is quite extraordinary. Well, not to you of course, you didn’t really pay any mind to it.

You just thought it was a natural thing, and you never understood why your old librarian in college would be surprised. Reading became a part of you quickly during your childhood. It was a reason to escape all of the bad things that were happening around you. You could teleport yourself anywhere at all, simply by reading words on pages. You put the book down, having finished it already in less than an hour.

“Didn’t you just get that book?” Wanda questioned, slightly amused.

“Hm?” You questioned, breaking away from your imagination, “Oh, yeah, it was a really good book.”

“So you understood every word of it?” She questioned again.

“Yeah, why?” You questioned, not knowing what she was getting at.

“Because you read really fast.” She said, eyebrows raised.

“Doesn’t everyone do that?” You questioned, head tilted to the side.

“Nope,” She shook her head, “Just you.”

“Oh,” You slouched, “I guess I just like books.”

“Don’t worry, I think it’s really cute.” She said with a smile.

Quicksilver/Pietro Maximoff: [underwater breath holding]

Originally posted by deanimagines67

You rolled your eyes at the childish being in front of you. Pietro wanted to go to the pool, and he managed to convince you to go. It’s not that you didn’t like the pool or the water, you were just in a sleep mood today. You told him you didn’t feel like walking all the way over there, and he offered to carry you. Since you couldn’t turn down the offer, you agreed. So, here you stood with him, in the pool and being challenged to a breath holding contest.

You had a knack for this, so you were fairly confident, and you turned him down. You didn’t want to make him feel bad, but he kept pushing it so you finally agreed. You’ve enjoyed being in the water since you were little, and sometimes, more often than not, you liked pretending you were a water creature. Which is how you managed to learn how to hold your breath for 3 minutes on a bad day. It’s also why Fury constantly gave you the missions involving water.

“Ready?” Pietro questioned.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” You asked and he smirked.

“Aw, afraid I’ll beat you?” He taunted and you narrowed your eyes.

“Bring it.” You said.

You took quite a few deep breaths back to back, it was one of the tricks you learned. If you override your brain with enough oxygen, and took a normal breath in before going under, it was supposed to help. That it did, it helped expand your lungs, and your daily yoga helped as well. You dipped underwater at the same time he did, and you sat perfectly still. You closed your eyes, bringing up happy memories in your mind.

That was another trick you learned: don’t focus on it. You stayed there for who knows how long, perfectly content. You didn’t hear Pietro come up from the water a while ago, and you were down for so long that he was beginning to think you had drowned. After another moment you opened your eyes, and didn’t see him underwater with you, so you pushed yourself back up to the surface. Looks like you had won, not like you were expecting anything else.

“Told you I’d win.” You said with confidence.

“Oh my God, are you okay?” Pietro asked and you raised a brow.

“Of course I am, I’m fine.” You said, confused.

“I thought you drowned.” He said, exhaling deeply.

“Nope, just have lungs of steel.” You wiggled your brows.

“That’s so cool, and kinda kinky.” He winked and you rolled your eyes.

Iron Man/Tony Stark: [belly dancing]

Originally posted by iwantcupcakes

You stood with your feet at shoulder width, the beat and rhythm of the music flowing through you. You took a moment to feel the music before you slowly moved one of your hips upward. You brought it back down, only to do the same move again. You were flowing perfectly to the beat of the instrumental music. It was a hidden talent of sorts; nobody knew you had it, not even your boyfriend Tony did.

You were an excellent belly dancer, you’ve been practicing for a few years now. At one point you wanted to make it a career, but somehow you ended up pulling away from the dream. You still practiced on a daily basis, you loved doing it. It was a creative outlet for you, and you could tell a story without even using any words. The beat of the music increased dramatically, and you moved your hips forward and backward to match.

“Holy crap.” Tony said and you froze, shooting a glare at him.

“Why are you spying on me?” You asked, slightly irritated but mostly embarrassed.

“Why are you trying to hide from me?” He questioned back and you sighed.

“I dunno.” You mumbled and he smirked.

“You are definitely doing that again, but this time with me in the room.” He said.

“How long were you watching?” You questioned, the smile still on his face.

“Long enough to be ridiculously turned on by your magical hips.” He wiggled his brows and you huffed, crossing your arms.

“Spy.” You pouted, turning away from him.

“Aw,” He walked behind you, “I’m sorry,” He snaked his arms around your waist, resting his head on your shoulder, “I just couldn’t help myself.”

“I guess it’s okay, if you can make it up to me.” You smirked.

“You know, I think I actually have a pretty good idea.” He said and you giggled as he kissed your neck.

Captain America/Steve Rogers [high alcohol tolerance]

Originally posted by everyartistwas-firstanamateur

You raised your eyebrows at the super soldier in front of you. You had made the mistake of bringing more alcohol home than he’s seen you ever do before. You had a rough mission, and all you wanted to do was get drunk and watch Disney movies. Unfortunately for you, Steve didn’t know that your alcohol tolerance was higher than the empire state building. So, like any normal person, he grew very concerned very quickly.

That’s how you ended up defending yourself for the past ten minutes. You knew that he meant well, but you weren’t about to give up the alcohol just to sedate his concern. You had to admit, you had a slightly concerning amount of alcohol to normal person. Honestly, you weren’t even sure if these would even get you drunk, and thanks to your abilities, you couldn’t die from alcohol poisoning. So, really, there wasn’t a point in worrying about you.

“Okay, babe, it’s fine, I promise you.” You reassured.

“Really?” He raised a brow.

“I just have a high alcohol tolerance, I could probably drink you under the table.” You reassured again.

“You know, I actually doubt that.” He said with a smile, which you returned.

“Oooh, is that a challenge?” You questioned excitedly.

“Well, I don’t kno-” He began to decline.

“You are SO ON!” You declared, slamming the alcohol down on the coffee table.

You darted into the kitchen and grabbed a could shot glasses before he could try to deny you again. Doing this might actually be more entertaining for you than just putting on Disney movies. While you were determined to win, you were also excited to see the outcome. You darted back into the living room, and Steve shook his head with a smile. You happily sat on the couch, setting both shot glasses on the table.

“Okay, so, whoever loses has to do laundry and dishes for the rest of the week.” You offered and he nodded.

“You sure you want to do this?” Steve questioned.

“Hell yeah, let’s go.” You assured.

hey!!! so i went to see thor ragnarok yesterday, and i thought i’d type up some Thoughts while it was still fresh in my mind. so here goes. THERE WILL BE SPOILERS but also i don’t want to do a cut because my blog theme is hard to read things on, so just shut your eyes and scroll down really fast i guess? i’ll send you a psychic message so you know when it’s safe to open them again

things i liked

  • the humour in this movie was on point. i mean, it’s waititi, so obviously it was going to be, but everyone just seemed like they were having a fucking blast doing it. it didn’t even feel like it was trying to be funny or quirky or slapsticky – it just put the characters in daft situations and let natural awkwardness do the rest
  • the giant monster made out of blue rocks who seems to have no idea what he’s doing and just wanders around exchanging pleasantries with everyone in a gentle new zealand accent. he tried to do a revolution once but it failed because he didn’t print out enough pamphlets. i don’t even know his name but he was legitimately the best part of this film and i want him on a poster
  • the “get help” plan, which, for the uninformed, consists of thor just fucking tossing his brother at oncoming enemies like a person-shaped rugby ball, and has apparently been performed enough times for loki to instinctively dread it happening
  • i hate doctor strange and benedict cumberbatch and the fact that he was included in this film for no reason other than to appease people, but i did enjoy his cameo (albeit very, very grudgingly). he’s just so done with thor’s nonsense and i felt it on a spiritual level. also when loki comes at him with a knife and strange just fucking teleports him off to norway like “bye”
  • “this one time when we were children, he transformed himself into a snake, and he knows i love snakes, so i went to pick up the snake to admire it, and he transformed back into himself and was like, “YAARGH, IT’S ME!!!” and he stabbed me. we were eight” fucking classic
  • the fact that it wasn’t entirely comedy-centred. sure, the main emphasis was on the ridiculousness of the whole thing, but there were definite emotional moments, and on the whole they were done well. (particularly the exchange between thor and loki in the elevator, and the part immediately afterwards with the attempted betrayal. you know the bit i mean)
  • in most marvel films you know that ultimately the villain will be defeated, and the planet will be saved, and everything will turn out okay, etc etc etc. here, that gets chucked out of the fucking window. literally anything can happen, and it does, even as you’re like “nah, no way, they’re not gonna go that far…oh. well. okay, then.” and that dispensing of the traditional formula made the whole thing feel a lot more unpredictable. which is good, i think!
  • valkyrie. everything about valkyrie. i have a massive weakness for butch women, and i have a massive weakness for lovable assholes, and when those two things combine it’s just like. hnghhh
  • also i was worried that she was going to be shoehorned into the “strong female character” stereotype, but that wasn’t the case at all? like she had moments of weakness and was really dorky and cute and she just felt like such a real person (aside from the whole “semi-immortal warrior woman on a flying horse” aspect, obviously)
  • on that point: there was no love story. this is entirely personal preference, but love stories in action films really annoy me (unless they’re done well, and they rarely are). plus, it feeds into the idea that the only reason to have a woman on the team is for the purpose of creating a romance with the main hero. but they didn’t do that! there was some light flirtation between thor and val, but it felt more friendly than anything else, and was very much in character for both of them. super refreshing, honestly
  • the trouble with marvel is that because nearly every movie has a different writer, character consistency is often lost. (see: natasha behaving completely differently in aou than she did in any other film, steve zigzagging between rigidly following the rules and going off to do his own thing, character development being gained and lost and gained again, etc.) that being said: thor and loki in this film felt more like thor and loki than in any other mcu flick. thor was maybe a bit dumber than i usually like, but the smiley optimism and earnestness was very much there, and loki cut a perfect balance between being An Asshole and being An Asshole With Feelings (whilst occasionally slipping back into his patented “melodramatic diva” persona). bruce wasn’t quite as much of a success, but i’ll get to that later
  • “i’m here.”
  • hela was unbelievably badass and every time she was on the screen i got a little bit gayer. i think it’s the antlers, personally

things i didn’t like

  • where was sif? there was no sif and it was just. never explained??? i’m starting to feel like marvel has this weird policy where they can only have a certain amount of women onscreen at a time, and if there’s any more than that an alarm goes off and everyone starts running around in a panic like “OH NO! THE WOMAN METER HAS GONE INTO THE RED! QUICK! CULL THEM! CULL THEM!” they’ve added in valkyrie and hela, and in order to maintain the status quo, they’ve skilfully sliced out jane foster and sif, like soviet-era teachers razoring out controversial passages from history books. if they didn’t show any of the warriros three then that would’ve been understandable, but fandral and volstagg and hogun were all (if briefly) in evidence. but sif is just. not. it’s fuckin bizarre man idek
  • kinda wish they’d done a bit more with hela’s character than just going “oh, she’s evil, and she likes to kill people and do evil stuff because she’s evil.” she already looks amazing, and is possibly the most powerful villain we’ve seen so far – so it would have been nice to have a little more emotional depth there, especially considering how interesting her backstory is
  • the plot was a little bitty in places. it did work, but there wasn’t much of a connection between thor performing as a gladiator and hela taking over asgard. if they’d found a way to link those two plotlines together it might have worked better, but as it was, the whole thing felt a lil bit contrived
  • we’ve always suspected that asgard isn’t quite what it seems to be (after all, no one ends up ruler of the nine realms without a little blood being spilt along the way), and in this film that gets confirmed – but after the initial revelation it’s just not really explored? there are some pretty heavy overtones of genocide and colonialism/imperialism, and it seemed kind of mad to bring up something like that and then just gloss over it. plus, it ignores the fact that in the avengers loki was pretty much doing exactly what odin did himself several thousands years ago, but on a slightly smaller scale. like…there’s a wealth of stuff to be done with that information, and they didn’t do any of it? weird
  • i was sort of hoping that odin would play a larger role in the movie, considering that so much of it indirectly revolved around him and his actions. instead, he turned into obi wan kenobi and then vanished in a big puff of gold dust. i don’t think that he actually exchanged more than a few lines with anyone, although given the relatively short length of the film that’s understandable enough
  • bruce got flanderised from a hyper-controlled scientist with self-loathing issues into a twitchy ball of nerves who’s constantly out of his depth. he’s not my favourite character, so it didn’t bother me too much, but it was still a little jarring
  • they didn’t show us the hug at the end and i’m pissed about it

anonymous asked:

Youre so cool and i feel like you know everything or at least know someone who knows something that someones asking about!

I’ll let you in on a few secrets:

1. I have an hilarious reading disorder where I read words by thier shape, rather than by breaking them down into phonetic components.  Sometimes I pronounce words wrong but it actually makes reading long and dense texts really fast and easy for me. 

So anytime I get an ask on something I don’t know, I pretty much spend an hour or three reading the wiki about it before hand.  I’ve never regretted it once, because the universe gets a little bit cooler with every thing I learn.

2. My favorite way to learn things is from someone who really loves the thing, and I like it when my friends are friends with each other and get to talk about the things they love, so if I know someone with expertise, I will 100% recc them.

cancer crew- they come home early

these are meant to be funny, folks //

Ian

Ian had been gone out to get dinner, which was just a 12 Value Pack from Taco Bell and some beers. So you knew that he wasn’t going to be gone too awfully long. You changed into your pajamas, a pair of shorts and a spaghetti strap, and were now spread out on the couch reading an e-book. A specific book, however. Fifty Shades Of Grey to be exact. 

You were enjoying the fuck out of it, reading really fast as immersed yourself into it’s pages. You weren’t about the BDSM life, at least you never tried anything like it, but reading about folks who lived it, fake or not, it intrigued you. It wasn’t like you were getting off on it- just appreciating well written literature. 

You were way to into the book to hear the door open, in fact, you’d of just thought you imagined a whip cracking, vividly picturing the scenes in the book to make it come to life. Pun intended. As you bit your nails reading a heated scene, you felt breathing down your neck. You still thought that you were imagining things.  

“oh that’s fucking gay.” Ian said, scaring the living daylights out of you and causing you to throw your phone in the air. He laughed. 

“Not fucking funny, you cunt!” You said, putting your hand to your heart as you gained composure. 

“You’re the one reading about BDSM in your spare time. How bout Mr. Carter will see you now?” He winked jokingly. You rolled your eyes. “bastard. tell anyone and I’ll have your head.” 

“You’ll give me head?” He asked, knowing exactly what you said, but wanting to tease you a little more. 

“You know what I said!” You yelled, huffing, a blush still on your face.

Joji

Joji was at the post office getting some packages he had ordered, and some he had.. recieved. After a couple minutes, you heard your phone go off, and a text could be read aloud. 

Joji: Traffic Jam. Gonna stab myself.

You smirked, you had been waiting for this moment. You walked into the bedroom the two of you shared, picking through the drawers and pulling out a certain article of clothing. The pink suit. Smirking to yourself as you took off your tanktop and leggings, you tried to get yourself not to do it- but you wanted too. You really wanted too. Slipping on the suit, zipping it up and covering your hair and chin with it’s pink material, you felt like a god. 

In the mirror, you saw your reflection and immediately started cackling, laughing until you coughed. “Imposter.” You whispered, before started to hum the tune of STFU, moving your pelvis front and back. When you heard the door open in your apartment, you started to freak out. Fuck, Fuck! Quickly you made for the zipper, but it was jammed. Just fucking perfect. The squeak of your bedroom door made you squeak back, not wanting to turn around to face your boyfriend. 

“Y/N?” He called out, before covering his mouth to restrain laughs. ‘What the fuck is going on?” He chuckled, you figured now you had to turn around. And when you did, the hysterical look on Joji’s face made you go as pink as the suit. “I can explain…” You began.  

You didn’t have too, Joji knew exactly what was going on here. He shook his head at you. “Well, at least you’re my favorite pink cunt. Not sure about the other folks.” He said sarcastically. Honestly- he enjoyed how tight the suit was on you. Not to mention- it was fucking hilarious.

Max

You knew that your boyfriend was gone out for a day, he was going grocery shopping for the two of you. You would of went, however, last night, you had told him you wanted show off your awesome pasta cooking skills. Knowing Max would be sidetracked by toy sections and potential video props, you decided to take the cooking slow. You were wearing an oversized white t-shirt, and Max’s pokemon boxers.

You were now playing some music through the loud speakers in the living room, loud enough to be heard lyric by lyric from the kitchen, which was beginning to get steamy from pasta boiling. You had your music on shuffle, so anything that played you were bond to vibe out to it. Your hips twisted with the beats of drums, singing along with the words, when there were actual words. 

However, when ‘Still Into You?’ by Paramore began to play, you suddenly felt like you were a headline act in a concert festival. Grabbing a ladle, you put one foot on the counter as the chorus blasted. 

“I should be over all the butterflies~” You yelled, you didn’t care if you sang good or not, you were in the comfort of your own home, by yourself. “I’m into you, I’m into you!” You shouted, now at the top of your lungs. You were going to start headbanging- or some kind of form of edgy shit, but when you brought your head up the first time, standing in the archway of the kitchen, was your boyfriend- Max. You screamed. 

“Max!” You shouted, putting your foot down, leaning against the counter now. “I uh-” You noticed that the smirk on his face had been there for a while now, and there were tears from where he had been laughing. You knew he had seen too much. You blushed like mad. 

“Glad to see how much you like..cooking?” He chuckled, setting the grocery bags on the counter. He couldn’t say you were untruthful, the food was smelling great- but he didn’t think Hayley Williams was a part of the recipe. “Are those my boxers?” He questioned, that goofy smile growing wider. You nodded. 

“Mention this at any point in the future and I’ll hang myself from the ceiling fan.” You replied, watching as he walked over to your corner of the kitchen. He kissed your forehead with a chuckle. “Don’t worry, I’m ‘still into you’.” 

You wanted to smack him.