reach my goals

Punta: Thank you for Twitcasting live 🎤

I left the recording available
so I think you will be able to watch it soon!

Gonna take a bath and go to sleep earlier 😴

So a week ago I finally moved out. Left my ex, my cunt of a roommate and a bunch of other people behind and moved away with my dogs.

My skin is clear, my hair is shiny. I’m losing weight like crazy cos I exercise more and I cut out smoking and drinking. Plus fresh food.

Now to just find a SD and I’m sorted. Wish me luck. I’m giving myself till the end of summer to reach the rest of my goals. If o fail, I’m quiting this and getting a vanilla job lol

Today is @viria​  Bday, May 13th! And bc of that I wanted to finally draw her sth. After 7 years…. That’s her from her instagram photo click

7 years ago I discovered Viria’s blog, I was a little bun back then. She inspired me to take up on drawing and introduced me to many, many things. I got my tablet bc of her, used sai, started reading Pjo and Haikyuu, bc of her art! I always envied her, her talent, her big tumblr blog, the way she draw. HER ART! But never realised how wrong my thinking was. Now when I’m more mature I realised that  Viria thought me many things. She thought me that I will never be able to draw like someone else, that making mistakes is ok and when I see how shitty my art is its ok, bc now I can see it!! I can improve! That finding my own art style is long process and my art is not bad bc it doesn’t have it’s style. She didn’t thought me how to never give up, but reminded me whenever I gave up on drawing, that I will never reach my goal bc no one will never reach it for me. And now I can trully say, I don’t envy your style, I envy you your power of will to never give up and thank you that you are with us!!!! 

Time Out.

Hi. Jakei here. The real one.

I’m gonna delete the latest posts because this silly game is over. I learned something about this…”kind” of excersise. It was funny, but very serious as well..

Let’s get straight to the point.

In three days Underverse will have one year since I created the first animation, the pilot showing my favorite Sanses from de AUs. 

When I had the chance I tried to said all time this project started as a mistake, like a lucky moment to show people my love for art and videogames. But I learned to stop calling this story like that. Is just something that came up to my mind and made me feel more confident to do something I love with the chance to earn money with this to accomplish my goal to have my own house where I can live in peace with my only family that is my mother.

That’s my main goal. So, don’t think the rushers and haters are making me feel bad and forcing me to quit. I had to deal with real rude and evil people before, getting paid for being humillated from Mondays to Saturdays and coming back home crying because of a real stressing and miserable situation. I don’t think this is the same case here. I’m not receiving money from them. I keep with this because is a way when I can reach my goal giving love to my current job as a independent artist.

The latest posts were just for joking but I realized that some people was taking it too seriously. I’m very, very sorry for worrying you, but also I want to thank you for supporting me. Please don’t hate people who was involved into that shitpost, and don’t hate people who are really trying to hurt me. I don’t want you get hurt or having a bad time trying to defend me. 

Unlike other cases similar to this one. I learned to stop worrying about this. I prefer ignore this or even taking this with humor like I did this week for distract myself in some way due the delay of Underverse 0.3 has been a bit stressful to me because I’ll continue animating until the video is released. Stereohead Studios has also many important things to do so blaming someone is just useless and unfair.

Something that I’ve learned from other big artists that I admire with all my soul like Crayon Queen and Myebi/ Comyet… is that we have enough living hard situations in this world, in our personal lives, and the less thing we can do as recognized artists in this fandom is trying to make our blogs a nice place and spread positive feelings despite hatred and the amount of terrible asks people make to them, because we’re motivating people and teaching kindness and respect to each other.  Not for nothing exists options on this platforms to avoid those bad comments. Is a waste of time crying and messing up your entire day because two or three guys said something that could hurt you. 

Is not that hard when you’re used to it.

Those guys don’t even know you and You don’t know them. So… man… why even waste your thoughts and feelings when you can keep working on your own stuff and improving your skills? Making a space for you and your fans to laugh, to smile, to show you how far have you came because of their support.

You’re doing something you love and that matter. Probably others not, probably they won’t have to deal with this style of life. And I’m sure many of us started to be recognized thanks to this fandom. Everyone started with a little level or we was too shy to show our stuff. 

Drawing well, animating well, telling amazing stories won’t decide your happiness if you’re not happy, if you don’t try to trust happiness and show them that you’re really fighting for that.

If you feel your blogs or another places with things like “uuh I don’t like this thing i made” “I suck” “this person told me that and i’m so upset i hate them” “that person made something terrible go and hurt them because them deserve it” “i love what i do but my life is hell” “i’m tired of x and y because they want z” … things can’t change in your life if you don’t start by yourself.

I thought many times about cancel Underverse and leave this fandom, not only because of haters and stuff. It was because I was judged by many of other big artists that doesn’t like this kind of fandoms and are working in their own projects. I thought it was unfair because I was getting recognition because something that I didn’t create. I just created a fan story. 

I’m pretty sure when I post the next animation the chaos will be back again but I don’t even care. I don’t have 100k yet so I don’t have a multitude telling me what to do and asking me when. Anyway, if I had them, I wouldn’t still care. Because I have clear what to do and how to make it works. I’m not here just for teaching people how to draw or animate. I’m here too for showing them how to be nice and patient and how those two things can bring you to a better way to see the world. 

That we are real, nice people and we’re having fun, putting effort and love when we’re making something for you. Fandom or not fandom content.


Have a nice day.



And XGaster.

To the corner. Right nao.

This is not just a booty transformation it’s a recovery transformation as well. On the left is when I relapsed into my eating is disorder and I was eat about 800 calories maybe less, I was restricting myself of most foods and was determined to eat 100% pure all the time. My meals were planed at a specific time, my mental health was shit and I would cry myself to sleep every night because I was so tired of living a life of restriction. I hated myself for being “weak” and felt so incredibly alone, and was fixated on the thought of being skinny. On the right is me now! I’m eating wtf I want and when I want it, I’m listening to my body, practicing initiative eating and self love everyday. I talk or write about my feelings, I lift heavy weights because that’s what I’m passionate about, but I don’t take exercising to the extreme anymore and if I feel tired and lethargic I don’t go to the gym. YES I still struggle, but I am patient with myself. I surround myself with people who bring positivity into my life and follow people who inspire me to reach my goals like @_kellyu @jenbretty @omgkenzieee @selfloveandstrength @gabbyscheyen and many more. Don’t give up on yourself and don’t beat yourself up. You are worthy of so much more. Live life the way you want to live it, not the way you see someone else live their life. Eat the pizza and feel damn proud of yourself for conquering your inner demons🌷

Yuuri isn’t just a badass he’s also a good person. The reason he can come across ‘cold’ is because of his degree of self-loathing, which causes himself to sometimes not acknowledge how much people around him care about him (something he works on as the series goes on! this is a big part of his character arc). It’s got nothing to do with his view of other people’s value of individuals and how much he cares about them and everything to do with how he views himself. He has trouble forming connections with others because he views himself as someone people wouldn’t want to form connections with. This is not necessarily okay, but it’s literally a huge part of his character arc!! He becomes so much better about this as the series goes on, and it’s wonderful to see. 

Here’s the thing about Yuuri Katsuki. He’s a selfless person, to a fault. People completely misread the ‘I’ll let the whole world hate me’ scene. It’s not about selfish love. It’s not about possessive love. It’s about making a choice between caring about how people perceive you and not caring about how people perceive you. 

Yuuri thinks that if he goes out there and skates his best, people are going to hate him, see him as taking Victor from the world. He says so what, fuck that. It’s more important to me that I reach my goal. I’d rather me be hated than Victor be hated anyway. Hate me for taking Victor from the world, fine. I just want to skate. I’d rather skate and be hated than have you like me and give up on doing something I love. To help himself in that situation, to give himself confidence, he reminds himself that he is the only person who does know Victor’s love the way he does, which is absolutely true. He reminds himself of the love he has in his life. That it’s unique. That’s it’s special. 

‘Victor is the first thing I’ve ever wanted to hold onto.’

Victor is the first thing he’s ALLOWED himself to hold onto (and even then, he tries to let him go later on because he’s self-sacrificing). 

There’s nothing selfish about that– or possessive, or anything of the sort. It’s someone looking at adversity and going ‘my goal is more important to me than your perception of me’, and for someone as self-deprecating as Yuuri, someone who has struggled with forming emotional connections because they haven’t felt like people wanted to form emotional connections with them due to their own lack of self worth, this is a HUGE DEAL. It’s awesome.

Allowing Yuuri to in a sense, claim something as his, is actually a triumphant moment for him, because he rarely does this. It’s good and right. Yuuri is often selfless to a fault. When he says ‘I wish to eat pork cutlet bowls with you’ we applaud him. When Yuuri wants something and expresses it, we CHEER for him.

Yuuri spends the entire last third of the series trying to sacrifice Victor despite the fact that Victor, to the audience, CLEARLY wants to stay with him. But Yuuri, darling Yuuri, due to his own anxiety and self-worth issues, sees himself as holding Victor back. He ‘wants to stay in figure skating with Victor forever’, but he’s willing to give up everything he loves so Victor can be happy, no hesitations. He smiles, he doesn’t cry. Heck he’s willing to be called selfish without argument even though that’s obviously nonsense. He’s confident in this decision because it’s just what’s right to him. He’s wrong because it’s not what Victor wants, but never doubt that Yuuri is a good person, a selfless person, who would give up anything in an instant for someone he loves. 

Yuuri’s mental illness informs a lot of who he is, and it causes him to stumble and sometimes make it LOOK like he’s undervaluing people but he’s undervaluing himself, and he’s such a good person and he’s so filled with love. He’s loving and supporting and sometimes he just needs to find a way to express it and realize that it surrounds him and people love him in return, and the show is so much about that. Don’t underestimate how good a person Yuuri Katsuki is.

I think the most frustrating thing about not losing weight or not reaching my goal weight is that it’s nobodies fault but my own.

Nobody sits down and forces me to cram food in my face.

Nobody holds me down and stops me from exercising.

I am well aware of my habits and how I could stop them.

Yet I don’t.

Every day, I allow myself to continue this cycle.

Being skinny is all I’ve ever really wanted, and I have no one to blame but myself for not being there yet.

Please look at my good birb boy who’s replacing my other dnd character, his name is Miki and he’s a bird bard ( aarakocra bard ) who keeps junk in his hat and mainly uses intimidation and deception to get what he wants~ He also dislikes violence, but will use cloud of daggers if anyone threatens him or his friends, and then promptly blame the daggers for the murder

What I learnt after losing 20kg in 3 months

1. It always starts on a high note but the key thing is to keep it going.

You see someone losing a lot of weight and suddenly you are so inspired and pumped to reach your ideal weight, or you realise that you have put on a significant amount of weight and decide to crash diet. It could even be for an upcoming important event. Usually this inspiration will last for a week or two, after which you start to give yourself a little more allowance, this is where most people fall back to where they were. It happened to me countless times.

You have to want it bad enough.

2. You have to be consistent.

Losing weight is hard af, but the important thing is to be consistent. This is what I did:

- take weekly progress photos (whenever I see how my body changes week by week I’m motivated to push on)

- weigh in weekly (I know how easy it is to be obsessed with the scale)

- follow inspiring people (this helps you more than you think)

- whenever I feel lazy to work out, which happens almost every single day, I tell myself this: ‘if you get out there and do what you have to for 30mins, you are one step closer to your goal. If not, the time will pass anyway even if you’re scrolling through Facebook.’

3. Workout

I started with swimming because it was the easiest. You don’t sweat as much, it’s easy on your knees, and it burns a shit load of calories.

After some time, I switched over from swimming to cycling HIIT on my stationary bike. After which I started doing blogilates’s PIIT28, and started hitting the gym after that.

What I’m trying to say is, change up your activities once in a while! Add some variation to your workout by keeping things interesting and you will look forward to it.

My best friend got me out of my comfort zone. I have been so unfit all my life that I wasn’t able to complete even a 2.4km jog. She dragged me along for a run and I fell in love with jogging. To be fair it happened about 6 weeks after I started working out.

It doesn’t get easier, you just get better!

You only need 30mins a day to complete your daily workout. Choose one workout, be it jogging or HIIT, and just do it!

No matter how tired I am, I make sure to get my 30mins in. Sometimes I impress myself with my determination.

4. Moral support

You’re committed to your goals and are working hard towards it. We all know it gets lonely sometimes. Motivate a friend to do the same! Motivate each other when things get tough or the scale is not budging. I’m lucky to have my BFF on this journey together with me.

Even for those who discourage you or those who once called you fat, you got to have the fire in you to make a change and prove them wrong!

Do it for yourself, your love ones. I know you can. I have fallen off the wagon many times too. But the lower you fall, the higher you will fly. Believe in yourself. I promise you, once you start believing, everything will fall in place. There will not be success without failure. You will get there sunshine. One day you will shine. You just got to start believing in yourself and start working damn hard towards your goal.

Old saying but pushes me a lot: 
it’s never going to be easy but it’s going to be SO worth it.

5. You didn’t gain it overnight, don’t expect to lose it in a month.

Don’t be demoralised just because people ain’t noticing the changes. Don’t beat yourself up.

I gave myself 6 months to reach my goal weight. 7kg more to go! Yay!

6: Your boobs/butt will shrink, there might be loose skins/ stretchmarks if you lose weight too fast.

What I did for boobs and butt:

Do planks and squats every day. Yes every day. It helps firms your boobs and squats give your flat booty a lift. 

I learnt this the hard way. Losing 50kg in a year 2 years ago definitely tested my skin’s elasticity. I researched ways to reduce the appearance of stretch marks since the only way you eliminate them is through a laser surgery.

Loose skins and stretchmarks are tricky. I tried everything so I can’t pinpoint what worked and what didn’t.  But it reduced the appearance of stretchmarks and my skin doesn’t look too loose either.

What I did:

- Drink lots of water (it really works!)

- Dry brushing

- Body scrubs (if you ask me I would say coffee scrub, I didn’t start selling it for no reason)

- Bio oil

- Clarins body tonic oil

- Weight training/resistance training                        

7. Relationship with food

Many asked me what meal plans do I follow or do I have certain calorie restrictions.

I have to clarify that I’m not going for a hot lean body hence this method might not work for you if you are going for that.

I do not follow any specific meal plans. I did many times in the past and tried countless meal plans including Herbal life, natroslim or even master cleanse diet. I’m not saying that all these doesn’t work, they do. You will see yourself losing weight, but it isn’t sustainable.

I eat whatever I want now but I control the portions strictly. I cut out sugar drinks too. Don’t underestimate the calories you are taking in as well, it could be the reason why you are not seeing results.

Learn to say no when being offered food (who does that?!). It’s not easy to say no to the piece of chocolate your best friend got for you, but it’s even harder burning it off later during your workout. If you didn’t plan to eat it, don’t. Save it for another day.

There are days when I have peanut butter toast in the morning, fish soup for lunch and economic rice without any rice (just the meat and vege side dishes) for dinner.

But there will also be days where I crave fried chicken. I order them without sides and go without sugar drinks.

Sometimes I live on ban mian (Singapore-style noodles with mince pork soup) without finishing the noodles. Or some days I have fruits before going to bed.

I try to keep my calorie intake within 1500. I don’t feel starved at all and I eat whatever I want in moderation. It keeps me content to keep going.

You are what you eat. If you know the food you are craving for is unhealthy, have it in small amounts. We all know what happens when we over indulge. A healthy journey consists of 80% diet and 20% exercise.

Food that will help you in your journey:

- Water, just drink enough water.

- Unsweetened green tea, yes you’ve heard this 2 million times. But it works.

- Fruits: Papayas, Watermelons, Apples, Bananas, Lemons and Kiwis.

- Needless to say lots of vegetables

Try new recipes like cauliflower rice. Or replace potato chips with kale chips.

There won’t be any food to avoid in my list because I genuinely believe in moderation.

8. Curbing cravings

You just had dinner but you are craving for dessert. We all know it’s not acceptable to do it every day.

I’d go for a jog if I were you. The cravings for unhealthy food usually subside after a run. You’ll burn 150 calories with 30 minutes of jogging, but it takes 1 serving of potato chips to gain it back. Is it worth it? You be the judge.

If not I’ll find an alternative like yogurt or fruits to curb the cravings.

The last method is to take off your clothes in front of the mirror and stare at your body. Tell me if you still want that tiramisu after that.

Many times we eat not because we need it but because we want it. A treat is only a treat if you have it once in a while. 

9. Shitty days

Just recently I broke down and cried just because I felt fat. I felt like the ugliest/biggest girl in the world and I just wanted to hide away from the world. There will be days where you feel like shit and nothing you do makes sense to you.

I allowed myself to cry and tell myself that I’m not good enough.

Sometimes we have to embrace our emotions instead of hiding them. Only when we acknowledge what we are feeling, will we be able to fix what’s really broken inside.

After my emotional battle, I pick myself up and continue whatever I was doing. I fixed what was going on inside and stayed focused. People around me saw results. I saw my results. I deserved every single bit of it because I worked hard for it.

Happiness is a choice. You are how you feel about yourself.

Don’t give up on something just because of the time or the difficulty to achieve it. The time will pass anyway. If you don’t work on yourself, who’s going to do it.

I learnt to love myself for every stretchmark, cellulite and scar that’s on me. At the same time, I do my best to be a better version of myself.

10. Take a break If you are tired, not quit.

Lastly, regardless how many times you fail, as long as you get up and try again, you will succeed in the end.

Getting healthy is not a quick fix, it’s a lifestyle. There will be days you feel like eating fast food and not working out. But as long as you get back on your feet the next day, I promise that everything will work out.

Never ever give up on yourself and your body, because you are the only one living in it.

Hope this helps!! Happy 2017! Keep on rocking! :) Let’s embrace 2017 together and achieve whatever you need to acheive!

@motiveweight - submission