You never were good at seeing the things that have the power to hurt you. You face hard time with hands over your eyes and “if I can’t see you then you can’t see me” chanting in your head. Because if you can’t see it then you don’t have to accept it, right?
I know you rather the sweet taste of a well crafted lie because you have been gagging on my Splenda truths. I want to crave out all the lies that have become me, to show you what I have done in your absence but none of me would be left. All of my half truths and spoiled words have keep me alive on lonely night.
It’s not like I fear death but I do fear the tears that will come with the letters you send in the mail. Letters written in your shaking handwriting, asking “how could you be so heartless? ” and I wish I knew. That’s what I’ll write but what I mean is “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to become your nightmares”. I know you’ll see the words I meant to say but you’ll have your eyes covered and the chant started before the tears come to your eyes.