i keep meaning to make meaningful posts about other characters than just raven and murphy (and emori) right now, but i honestly can’t bring myself to do that because these two took over my heart in a way that people should’ve warned me about and i can’t escape these feelings. so, since i can’t talk about anyone else I’ve been re-watching their last scene and… i cant help but wonder how much murphy had to think about the way his and raven’s positions have switched and it’s her now who is going to die alone (up in space) - something he always dreaded - and him who is going to survive with the others.
its pretty interesting to me, because when murphy comes face to face with what raven is up to we get a very deliberate process of how he gets to that information, with the camera revealing all important pieces he needs before he even talks to her
its a pretty rough reveal in my opinion, because murphy didn’t see this coming, but now he stands there and sees raven work next to a not-real-body that wears a spacesuit… (you know, the same dummy we have seen in becca’s office that murphy was in when he repeated luna’s words to himself after his fight with raven - episode 6). he is aware of her hallucinations/interactions, but there is also the fact that he doesn’t see anyone else around her.
even at the height of the playfulness that comes with her line “tell them i floated myself” and raven hugging him goodbye it’s just a deeper hit into the heart, because again… raven chooses death and she is going to die alone.
and when he leaves he looks back
and it just hits me how symbolic the “don’t want to die alone” theme was for murphy the whole time and how now it’s raven who spirals right into it. i hope i’m not wrong about this, but i truly believe that raven’s friends will come back for her. she said it. my bibi is too awesome to leave behind. and knowing how much murphy cares for her makes me want to cry even harder.