random shit i find in my room

I’ve been playing Symmetra a lot recently. Here is a list of reasons why:

  • I can bring basketballs, Pachimarus and other Random Shit I find around the map to the objective. 
  • People think it’s a peace offering. I kill them. 
  • I can create Microwave Rooms and sit primly in them while people get paralyzed and die. sometimes I even say “Hello.”
  • I can jump around the objective screaming, “HERE COMES THE DANGER NOODLE!!!!!” in team chat as I wave my Scary Laser Beam at the red team
  • Accidental Plays of the Game, otherwise known as “Whoops, I got a quad kill,” and “FUCKING WARN ME BEFORE YOU NANOBOOST ME ANA [INCOHERENT SCREAMING AND DANGER NOODLE WAVING]”
  • Teleporter Cliff Trolling (aka, DID I NOT TELL YOU TO PLAY DVA?)
  • Watching all the idiots fail to get the basketball in the hoop and then just calmly threading it through the hoop to the ribbons and streamers I deserve
peaches (cheryl blossom x fem!reader)

2

Pairing: Cheryl Blossom x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 767

Request: A Cheryl Blossom x Fem Reader for your riverdale ones. You’re at one of Cheryl’s parties and you’re really drunk and keep embarrassing her in front of the gang by saying soft things about your relationship and ruining her HBIC image but every time she try’s to get mad you say something cute and then run off to do more stupid things “Stop being cute I’m trying to be mad at you”

Even if Cheryl Blossom’s manor seemed gothic at times, you still felt completely comfortable as you lounged on the couch during one of her parties, waiting for her to return from wherever she went off to.

“God, Y/N. I don’t know how you do it, she scares the shit out of me.” A mutual friend your current state of mind couldn’t recall commented.

You easily laughed. You felt you were the only one who truly knew your girlfriend. “Trust me, she’s not that scary. She is waaaay too beautiful for that!” you hiccuped, the red solo cup in your hand finally getting to you.

“Y/N!” You heard Cheryl shout, grabbing your arm and pulling you up from the couch. “Are you drunk already? The party’s only been going on for half an hour!”

“But, Cheryl!” You whined. “That’s a whole thirty minutes!”

“Exactly. That’s such a short amount of time.” She said sternly, and people around the room fell silent, knowing she was taking her place.

“Uhh, that’s the same amount of time it took you to ask me out. That was a reeeaallly long time, remember? You couldn’t find the words and you just held my hand, talking about—“

“Dont!” Cheryl put a hand over your mouth. “Bring that up here!” She turned on her heel and walked away from you swiftly, going to take care of other matters while you pouted.

“Aww shit, I was hoping she would make out with you again!” A random jock high-fived another jock.

You sat back down. “Well, honestly, same.”

Reggie laughed. “Oh damn, she’s agreeing with us— she’s really out of it.”

“I do want her to kiss me…” You stated obviously, confused. “She stares into your eyes really hard right before, and her lips are so soft… and I always tangle my hand in her hair, because that’s soft too…” You grinned stupidly.

“Aww, that’s so adorable!” Betty squealed.

“Peaches!” Your girlfriend stormed into the room again, this time sitting next to you on the couch. “I told you not to tell any stories about us!”

“But whyyy? They’re so good!” You complained.

“Hey, why does she call you peaches?” Archie asked, knowing you would launch into a story and anger her further.

“Well, right before we had our first kiss—“

“Y/N!” Cheryl nudged your shoulder, but she couldn’t stop you even if she screamed, which she knew would be ridiculous.

“I was eating a lollipop, right? And she asked me what flavor it was, and I was crying and annoyed from that day because someone outed me when I didn’t want to be, so I just crossed my arms and told her to figure it out herself. So she walked right up to me, pulled it out of my mouth, and kissed me. Long and hard. And I stopped crying.” You smiled, staring off into the distance.

“That’s somehow hot and cute at the same time.” Veronica stated.

“Yeah, and then she just told me, peaches, and walked out.” You giggled.

Cheryl crossed her arms, rolling her eyes. “I can’t believe you just told that story, and you left out the part where you avoided me for three days after that.”

“That’s because I couldn’t deal with my feelings for you… they were so much and I was just scared of myself, and I was scared that I wasn’t enough, because— you’re like, you’re everything…” You slurred again, trying to make sense through your clouded head.

Cheryl smiled softly at you and took your hand. “You are enough, how many times do I have to say that? And— wait!” Cheryl yanked her hand away from you. “Stop being cute, I’m trying to be mad at you!”

“But you can’t be!” You protested.

“Oh, and why’s that?” Cheryl went back to crossing her arms, tilting her head in her typical mean-girl fashion.

“Because I love you,” You stated this as if it were obvious.

Cheryl dropped her arms, falling silent for a moment, before abruptly grabbing your face and kissing you hard as some on-lookers cheered. “I love you too,” She stood up again. “But don’t think for one second that I’m not still angry you said that for the first time in front of everyone, and drunk!”

She stomped away angrily, and while other people in the room seemed slightly uncomfortable, all you did was laugh. You were familiar enough with your girlfriend’s antics, and you shouted, “You love me!”

“Shut the fuck up!” Cheryl echoed down the hallway, and you smiled.

a/n: first kiss = true story

TAG LIST: @potter-the-marauder @itsjaynebird @jugbug-imagine @jxggie-jxnes @casismyguardianangel

Originally posted by stellarollins

Roman Reigns One Shot - The Secret

Roman watched her from where he was standing in the ring, admiring the way her pants and top hugged her curves. His eyes traveled unabashedly over her body as she faced away from him, talking to Stephanie.

“Uce, you with us?” Dean whacked him on the arm, his last resort in getting his friend’s attention.

“Yeah, yeah,” he said with feigned annoyance, “What’s up, Ambrose?”

Dean’s gaze travelled to where Roman had been looking and he chuckled. “Way outta your league, man,” he laughed as he looked towards Seth and winked. “And way outta your pay scale.”

Seth grinned, “Dean’s right, man.” He looked towards where the two women were deep in conversation towards the top of the ramp. “You might be pretty to look at but there ain’t no way she’s ever gonna look your way.”

Roman grunted in frustration. “Fuck off, both of you,” he snapped, clearly irritated.

“Just statin’ facts, man,” Dean patted him on the shoulder as he walked back towards where Seth was standing. “C’mon, let’s practice this new move.”

Roman glanced over at her one last time before joining the other two. There was no doubt that Alexis Buchanon was way out of his league but he didn’t need two of his closest friends reminding him of that. He knew they were only looking out for him but it still sucked. He had been hooked from the day he saw her at headquarters a few months ago and he hadn’t been able to get her out of his head since.

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Originally posted by narryintheam

Niall Horan One Shot - The Secret

Niall watched her from where he was standing onstage, admiring the way her pants and top hugged her curves. His eyes traveled unabashedly over her body as she faced away from him, talking to Stephanie.

“Mate, you with us?” Louis whacked him on the arm, his last resort in getting his friend’s attention.

“Yeah, yeah,” he said with feigned annoyance, “What’s up, Tommo?”

Louis’ gaze traveled to where Niall had been looking and he chuckled. “Way outta your league, man,” he laughed as he looked towards Liam and winked. “And way outta your pay scale.”

Liam grinned, “Louis’ right, man.” He looked towards where the two women were deep in conversation towards the back of the floor seats. “You might be pretty to look at but there ain’t no way she’s ever gonna look your way.”

Niall grunted in frustration. “Fuck off, both of ya,” he snapped, clearly irritated.

“Just statin’ facts, man,” Liam patted him on the shoulder as he walked back towards where Louis was standing. “C’mon, let’s practice this new song.”

Niall glanced over at her one last time before joining the other two. There was no doubt that Alexis Buchanon was way out of his league but he didn’t need two of his closest friends reminding him of that. He knew they were only looking out for him but it still sucked. He had been hooked from the day he saw her at Capitol Records headquarters a few months ago and he hadn’t been able to get her out of his head since.

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The Bucket List

Pairing: Steve x Reader 

Warnings: none? 

Prompt: you talk in your sleep

word count: 3390

A/N: this strayed so far from the prompt but I liked it too much to stop writing it. Hopefully you guys enjoy it. It could be really shit!!!! I wrote it running on four hours of sleep, so please don’t judge me if it’s bad, I just wanted to write something nice for you guys. 

“You talk in your sleep—“ Steve spoke as he entered the kitchen, pulling the bag of oatmeal from the top shelf.

I looked up from my bowl, a small stream of almond milk dribbled down the side of my mouth. “Huh?” I questioned as I wiped it away with my sleeve.

He narrowed his eyes and stared at me in confusion and a little bit of disgust, “uh—“ he shook his head, “you talk in your sleep. I heard you last night.”

I furrowed my brow as I shovelled down another mouthful of cereal. “What was I saying?” It interested me to know what I spoke about in my slumber. My college roommate had always told me that I did it, but my punishment for chatting away to myself was never knowing what I’d said—she was tough on me.

“You were talking about a handsome man in blue, I can only assume that was about me.” A small smirk played on his lips as he placed his bowl in the microwave.

“Okay Rogers,” I warned, “don’t reach. Now what was I really saying?” I asked again—a slight blush creeping onto my cheeks. The truth was I had the biggest crush on my training partner. It was just like high school, when you’d get a crush on one of the senior boys. Steve was the senior boy everyone had a crush on and I was lucky enough to train with him. It pleased me to walk into the gym every day and watch as he went one on one with the punching bag—his training shirts were always tight, accentuating his ungodly muscles and he was always so damn nice—but what I liked most was that he never played down my ability to fight. He fought me like he would fight any enemy and that in itself was the most attractive thing about him.

“Are you blushing (Y/N)?” He continued to smirk at me, knowing he was getting a reaction.

“Oh jog on.” I waved him away, “I see you shirtless every day, pretty sure if I wanted to—okay you know what nevermind, I can’t talk about you like that.” I began to toy with my cereal instead of eating it.

“Jog on—“ he repeated me, “is that a British thing?”

I rolled my eyes and poked him in the chest, “tell me what I was saying.”

“Fine, fine!” he put his hands up in defeat. “You were talking about the ocean—saying you were scared of it. You said something about a giant squid taking you away and pecking you with its beak.”

“Mmmmm,” I leaned back in my chair, “now that sounds more like me.” I really did have an irrational fear of giant squid.

“You’re really scared of the ocean?” He raised an eyebrow.

“Yep,” I got up from my seat and meandered to the sink.

Steve turned to face me, “but you can control it?”

I scoffed at his comment—I always seemed to get the same reaction when I told people. “Just because you can control something, doesn’t mean you can’t be afraid of it.”

“Wow,” he nodded his head in agreement. “That’s so deep.” He took a sip of his orange juice just as I went to lightly slap him on the head. The juice went sputtering out of his mouth and I let out a loud gasp.

“Oh wow—“ I couldn’t help but laugh, “I’m so sorry.” I grabbed some paper towel from beside the sink. “Oh my gosh.” I dabbed at his mouth before I could wipe the table. “You should’ve seen your face.” He rolled his eyes and grabbed the paper towel from me.

“Very funny.” He sighed as I sat back down—still chuckling at the mess I’d caused.

“Hey,” I tilted my head, sending him a tight-lipped smile “you shouldn’t make fun of my quotes.”

He shook his head, in disbelief “I never disagreed with you, but whatever you’re right.”

“I know I am Rogers, when am I not right?”

“When you’re left.” He looked up at me, the biggest smile plastered on his stupid face.

“Ohhhhh my god.” I didn’t want to laugh—I really didn’t. In fact I was certain that I was laughing at him and not with him. “You—no” I slapped my hands over my mouth in shock. He’d just told what was possibly one of—if not the worst joke of all time. “You really need to never tell that joke again, please I beg you.”

“Oh,” he frowned, “I got it from Scott—I thought he was the funny guy.”

“Scott is the funny guy, let it stay that way.” I leaned over the dining table to pat him on the shoulder.

“I’m scared of the ocean too by the way.” He quickly changed the subject—I slumped back into my chair when I noticed the blue of his eyes deepen.

“Well that’s because—well, yes—well, okay, yep.” I awkwardly got up from my seat. I hated that sometimes I was so calm and collected around him and then two seconds later I was the definition of ‘awkward mess’. “You know what, I’ll just see you at training.”

“Uh—okay,” I could tell he was confused by my suddenly erratic behaviour, but he went with it nevertheless. “I’ll see you then.”

I awkwardly waved before scrambling out of the kitchen.

“He said he was afraid of the ocean too and I freaked out, cause you know he’s been through so much with the damn sea—“

Wanda couldn’t wait for me to finish my sentence—she instantly burst out laughing. “Wow,” she calmed herself down. “I can always count on you to make my bad days better.”

“Don’t laugh at me,” I whined, “this is really bad.” I knew I couldn’t blame her for laughing because I really was a joke.

“Okay no, no” she stopped herself from laughing again. “I’m telling you now,” she placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. “If there’s anyone he likes in this whole facility it’s you!” I didn’t know where she’d pulled the idea from, but I liked it. “You haven’t embarrassed yourself—I can bet that he’s forgotten about it already.”

“Yes, but I keep making myself look stupid—eventually he’ll remember.” It was only a matter of time before Steve realised; I wasn’t funny, I was just a mess.

“You’re his training partner, he knows how fierce you are! So for you to be awkward outside of that dojo means nothing! He’s seen you in your rawest form, he knows the real you.”

“It’s just the fact that I try my best to flirt or create some banter and then I ruin it.” I shoved my head into her pillow and let out a loud groan.

“You really don’t see how great you are. All those awkward encounters? They add to your character and show that you feel something.”

“Jeeze,” I whistled under my breath as I lifted my head. “You really know how to be the supportive friend.”

“I know,” she smiled sincerely. “I didn’t have anyone when I thought I was making stupid mistakes, so the least I can do is be a good friend now that I have one.”

“Wow—“ I placed a hand over my heart, “I’m pretty sure that’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

“Stop it,” she laughed, “I’ve been nice before.”

“Hmmm,” I pretended to think about it. “I guess you have.”

“Hey—“ Steve said as he waltzed into the gym “what are you doing in here before me?” He knew the drill, he’d box and I’d walk in and pretend to be unfazed by his perfect form.

“Well,” I struggled to speak as I did my push ups, “I don’t like to admire hot and sweaty Captain America every day.”

“I always knew you were admiring me,” he dropped his bag and then lowered himself onto the mat next to me. “You having a bit of trouble there?”

My arms felt like jelly and there was sweat dripping from every crevice, I was on my 65th push up and I only needed one more to beat my personal best. I managed to squeeze in another three before collapsing into a heap. “I never have trouble.” I joked as I struggled for breath.

Steve chuckled as he got back up. He walked over to my gym bag and foraged for my water bottle. “Here,” he said placing it down next to me.

“Thank you,” I breathed—sitting up, before I gulped down almost the entire contents.

“So you never denied that you were admiring me.” The stupid smirk that I was far too accustomed to graced his face.

“Shut up,” I mustered enough strength to elbow him in the ribs.

He grabbed my elbow and pulled me closer. “That’s still not denying it.” It was the first time he’d ever been so cheeky around me and I had to say; I loved every single moment of it.

“You know what.” I wriggled myself free from his grip and grabbed my water bottle—without warning I squirted it in his face. “Is that enough denying for you captain?” I raised an eyebrow.

“Shit—“ he lifted his shirt to wipe his face and the bottom of his torso peaked out from underneath. I had to stop myself; I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if he caught me. “I’ll get you back for that (Y/N)” he warned.

“I’m sure you will,” I said casually—as if my heart wasn’t about to explode.

“Enough of that. Down to the serious stuff.” He wriggled himself around so that he was sitting in front of me.

“What,” I fake gasped. “You mean we weren’t being serious just then?”

He laughed lightly before shaking his head. “I was thinking that we could find the spare pair of gloves in the storage room and spar today.”

My arms felt like they were going to snap off, but I couldn’t resist sparring with Steve. He was just so precise and agile—all his movements were so natural, yet so unpredictable. “Sounds good to me.” I huffed before gulping down the last bit of my water.

“Great!” he sprung up, “I’ll go find the gloves.”

“Wait!” I shot up as well, “I’ll help you look.”

The two of us stood at the door of the storage closet, not sure where to look first.

“Christ, this is a tiny room.” I coughed as dust particles bombarded my throat.

“You’re not wrong.” Steve agreed as he crouched down.

“I regret not bringing my gloves today.” I said as I mirrored his actions, our shoulders pressing against each other as we both rummaged through random crates.

“Well—“ whatever he was about to say was cut off by the sound of a siren blaring.

“Shit!” we both stood up at the same time. The door to the storage room slammed shut within seconds, ultimately sealing us inside. The shock of it all caused me to stumble back into his arms.

He caught me gently, as if I were as light as a feather. “I forgot there was a lockdown drill today,” he let me go and I awkwardly shook myself upright.

“Well that’s just dandy isn’t it?” I flopped down onto one of the crates. Hiding my face so he wouldn’t see the blush that had crept onto my cheeks.

“Sorry,” He sighed as he pulled up a crate next to me.

I took a second to calm myself before looking at him, “it’s not your fault.”

We both sat in silence—instructions blared from the speaker in the dojo, but they were muffled by the titanium door that had sealed us in. I fumbled with my fingers for a while, before turning to look at Steve.

“What?” I questioned—my voice catching in my throat when I realised he’d been staring at me.

“Your eyes—“ he gulped, “they changed colour.”

“Oh yeah,” I averted my gaze to the floor—I was embarrassed by the whole situation.

He placed his knuckle under my chin and gently turned my head, so that I was looking at him again. “They’re—“ he hesitated for a second, “they’re beautiful.”

His comment struck me—I honestly felt like my heart was going to exit my body through my throat.

He didn’t move his knuckle from under my chin; instead he moved his face closer to mine. In fact, he was so close that I could smell his aftershave, which by that point should have faded—so close that I could feel the heat radiating off his skin.

“This is a really small room.” I repeated, as a lump began to rise in my throat. Was he going to kiss me? Or was he just moving irrationally close to me for no reason? I had no idea.

He smiled, “you say the dar—“ the clanking of the titanium door struggling to opening broke us apart. I’d never moved faster in my life—I felt like Pietro as I stumbled to my feet at the speed of light.

“Um, you know what? I’m not feeling so great. I think I’m gonna cut this short, if you need me I’ll be in my room.” I didn’t wait for a response—I rushed out of the dojo and toward my room, leaving him as confused as ever.

I was half way through a pint of ice cream before there was a knock at my front door. “Bloody hell,” I muttered under my breath as I set down the dessert and slinked towards the door.

“Hi—“ Steve said as I flung the door open. “Can I—uh—I just came to check if you were okay.” He ran his hand through his hair nervously.

“Uh hi.” I narrowed my eyes— still not quite sure why he was standing there, considering I was perfectly fine. “I’m okay, is there a reason I wouldn’t be?” I moved aside and gestured for him to come in.

“It’s just that you left in such a hurry before—“ He held on to the back of his neck as he spoke, “I thought maybe I did something wrong.”

“Oh—“ I bit my lip, remembering just how close we’d gotten in that moment. “No, you—you were fine.” I resumed my seat on the couch. He stood beside the armrest, awkwardly staring down at the TV.

“You can sit down you know.” I chuckled as I patted the spot next to me.

“You know I—nevermind.” He sat down without any complaints to which I replied with a smile.

“Your hair is still wet,” I reached out to feel it. When I realised how weird I was being I pulled away, but was caught off guard when he entwined his hand with mine.

“I uh—“ he quickly shook his hand away and the two of us averted our eyes to the TV—unsure about what had just happened. “What are you watching?” he croaked.

“American Gangster—hey do you still have that list of movies you need to watch? Surely this is on there?” I distinctly remembered him telling me about his lists and how he’d aimed to finish everything on them.

He let out a small laugh, “you still remember that?”

My mouth formed an ‘O’, “I am shocked that you have such little belief in me and my listening capabilities.”

He laughed louder this time,“you’ll be happy to know that it is on my list and that I have in fact seen it.”

“I’m so proud,” I beamed as I clapped my hands together. “Look at you, de-fossilizing yourself one step at a time.”

His face fell in an instant, and I felt like I’d been stabbed. I’d upset him and I hadn’t meant to. “Look I better go.” He got up from his seat, “I’m glad you’re okay.”

“Hey wait!” I grabbed his hand and pulled him back down. “I didn’t mean it like that.” I hadn’t meant for my comment to hurt him, but I realised that it’d been a dumb move on my part. “I’m proud of you, you’re not a fossil and even if you were, you’d be my favourite.” A cheesy grin spread across my face as a small smile fleeted on his.

“Favourite fossil huh?” he raised an eyebrow in question.

“Favourite.” I leaned forward and in the spur of the moment I kissed his cheek.

We were both taken back for a second—each of us knowing it was out of character for me.

“(Y/N)” Steve said quietly, “there’s something on my list that I need your help to finish.”

“You need my help?” I wasn’t quite sure what he would need me for. There was nothing I could do that the others couldn’t—apart from controlling the sea, that there was exclusive.

He nodded, his eyes turning the dark shade of blue that I’d only seen once before.

“You’re not going to kiss me are you?” I snorted, trying to play it off as if it weren’t a legitimate question.

“Uh—dammit.” He slapped his hands against his knees and got up. “I’m such an idiot.”

“No, nO, nOo, NO!” I scrambled to my knees and waved my hands in the air like a mad woman.“I mean, no don’t go anywhere not no don’t kiss me.” My voice was frantic.

He sat back down, his head in his hands as he let out a frustrated groan. “So you want me to kiss you?” Now it was his turn to be confused.

“Yes!” I almost shouted, “I would like nothing—“

He didn’t wait for me to finish, before I knew it our lips were pressed against each other. His hand roamed to the small of my back, pulling me closer so that I was able to straddle him as our lips moved in sync. I couldn’t believe what was happening—after all those days of admiring him, Steve Rogers was kissing me and he wasn’t holding back either.

I found myself lost for breath as he deepened the kiss. His hands balled into fists as he grabbed ahold of my t-shirt—he was trying to pull me closer, but I was already as close to him as I could be with my clothes on.

“Fuck,” he moaned as I fumbled to pull his black v-neck off.

“Wait,” I breathed as I pulled away.

“What?” He asked, staring at me cautiously.

“That was the first time I’ve ever heard you swear.”

“Dear God,” he said as his lips caught mine once more. “You are really something else.”

I pulled away again and surveyed his face, “like a good something else or?”

He laughed out loud and I couldn’t help but laugh either, he was just so infectious. “Good I promise.”

“Okay cool” I grinned before wrapping my hands around his neck. “Cause I’ve had a crush on you for a while now.” I whispered my confession against the skin just below his ear. A massive smile spread across my face when I heard him mutter something inaudible under his breath.

“Oh really?” He smirked, as one of his hands slinked under my T-shirt so that he could trace shapes against my skin.

I frowned as I led my index finger around the outline of his abdominal muscles. “I hope you’re not laughing at me internally.”

He leaned forward and placed a small kiss to the corner of my mouth. “I swear I’m not. I think you’re the funniest woman alive and honestly I want to spend all of my time with you.”

“Is that why you set up so many training sessions Rogers?” I tapped my finger against his nose and he kissed my chin.

“Maybe,” he grinned as he gently pulled me back down. “Is that why you attended all of them (Y/N)?”

“Mhm,” I sucked in my bottom lip as I stared down at the man in front of me. “That’s not even a question.” I answered—our foreheads pressed together.

“Then let’s not waste time dwelling on it.”

“Hey Rogers?”

“Mmmm?” He mumbled in response.


“Why am I the only one with a shirt on?”

Unexpected Babysitter

A/N: THIS WAS ORIGINALLY A PART OF THE DRABBLE GAME BUT IT IS WAYYYY TOO LONG TO BE A DRABBLE SO HERE’S A FIC! (drabble game is still going,,, i just got carried away)

Warnings: like one or two cuss words, fluff, mention of naked babies and netflix

Request:  Can you do a Philip Ham x reader where phil is babysitting his siblings and calls his hest friend (reader) to come help him becauwe she’s real good with children. She comes and is really good at everything and the kids love her. So then one of the kids sets em up and they kiss and fluff.

Pairing: Philip Hamilton X Reader

Word Count: 2,012 (when i said i got carried away, i meant it. This is my longest fic jesus)

AU: Modern


You began to make tea for yourself, breathing in the scent of the amazing warm liquid. Walking to the sofa, you began to set up Netflix on the TV. Seconds before you pressed play on your favorite TV show, your best friend Philip Hamilton began calling you.

You felt butterlies in the depth of your stomach at his contact on your phone. His contact picture was of you and him at Disneyland, side by side. That was the day you realized that you loved your best friend, Philip. Although, he would never reciprocate. Or so you thought.

You shook your thoughts away and answered the phone, bringing it up to your ear. The first thing you heard were little kids, Philip’s siblings, yelling incoherently. You heard small feet on the other line hitting the floor as they ran. You heard Philip yell, “William, put your pants back on!” You chuckled into the phone as Philip continued to yell at his youngest brother, William.

When Philip finally realized that you had answered he tried to act cool. “Oh. Hey Y/N.” He said calmly before huffing at soemthing the children did.

“What the hell is going on?” You giggled as Philip groaned.

“My parents are on a date. And they left me with the kids. It’s a horror show to say the least.” He rambled quickly. You sighed and walked into the kitchen, placing your tea in the sink.

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anonymous asked:

Does Gil have any flags in his room. Like the Prussian flag or something to show off

Gil: I actually have a relatively small room. One side is a huge window, another side is where my door is, with a bunch of posters and a lamp. I have a big sliding closet to the left,  and the other side is covered in posters and my art and there’s several shelves near my bed with a bunch of trophies and awards and random shit I find at conventions. And prints. Aaaaand figurines. There’s a big flag under the shelves. 

//mun took the time to design a room for a fictional character shut up// 

  • Azriel: Elain do you have pot in this house? Cassian told me you bought pot do you really-
  • Elain: Yes
  • Azriel: I- why do you have pot
  • Elain: Azriel, I told you I wanted to start a small business.
  • Azriel: this has got to be some joke I don't believe- *walks into living room to find Elain holding a flower pot*
  • Azriel: oh thank the cauldron I thought you were doing drugs
  • Elain: *flips pot over and little pots rolls out*
  • Azriel:
  • Azriel: oh okay then-
  • Elain: I got a lot of pot *dumps blunts out of the little pots*
  • Azriel:
  • Elain:
  • Azriel:
  • Elain:
  • Azriel:
  • Elain: there's no fucking punch line Az I'm selling marijuana
Buzz 3 (a Kyungsoo series)

MATURE CONTENT 18+ ONLY

Genre: angst/smut/fluff

Characters: Kyungsoo + OC

Description: OMG you guys, shit gets angsty, but don’t worry, it’s still smutty. :) here’s part 3 of the buzz series. Eeeeeeeek! Edited to add fluff, cause I reread it and felt all fluffy, so yeah, fluff too 😜

Buzz [M]: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, part 9, part 10 coming soon.

“What the hell do you mean Baekhyun found out!? How did he find out?!” JiAn angrily whispered into her cellphone from her hotel room.

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A Christmas Miracle part two

A little festive fun with Negan

Negan x wife number 6 (reader - Y/N)

4100 words

Warnings - Negan language, smutty goodness, sexy aesthetic NSFW

Catch up with the first part A Christmas Miracle part one

tagging my lovlies

@mypapawinchester @kijilinn @mamapeterson @flames-bring-a-ton-of-ash @negandarylsatisfaction @rapsity @strangersangel9 @wickednerdery @ladylorelitany @angelak72081 @scarygoodfanfics @superpinkkcat @gageef @ericas-negan77 @miss-nori85 @ali-pennell @smuttwd @purplejellybean

If you want on or off the taglist, please let me know!

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Proposal- James Madison X Reader

Request: *RUNS* James Madison wanting to propose to his gf and not knowing how to do so so he asks Jefferson and (begrudgingly) the Hamilsquad? They plan something elaborate and hijinks ensue?? from @sweaterkitty-fluff
A/N: there is some swearing in this one and implied female reader

I opened the door, excited to see my boyfriend after a long day of work and when I did, my jaw dropped and I closed my eyes and opened them back up, trying to make sure what I was seeing wasn’t a dream.

It wasn’t.

There were turtles scattered across the entire room and half of the floor was covered in a giant puddle. There was uncooked noodles scattered across the living room and kitchen. There was several articles of clothing randomly discarded and random strands of fabric lying in the puddle. The whole apartment smelled like burnt macaroni and upon closer inspection, a whole baking pan full of mac and cheese was in the puddle as well.

“James?” I yelled out, trying to find out where my boyfriend was.

“Oh shit.” I heard someone say and Alexander Hamilton popped his head out of the bathroom.

“Is there any reason why you are in my apartment? And why my apartment looks like a war zone?” I asked him, hands on my hips. He sighed.

“C'mon John.” He said and he dragged out John Laurens.

“Jefferson! Madison! She’s home and we come in peace.” John yelled and from our bedroom appeared James, Thomas, Lafayette and Hercules.

“James? What happened?” I asked him. He sighed and rubbed his temples.

“That's… a long story.” He sighed. Thomas cleared his throat and moved towards me a bit.

“James asked me for help on… something important. And so I was excited, right? I told him this great plan.”

“It was an awful plan!” Alex argued and Thomas glared at him.

“Okay like your plan that involved water ballons was any better!” Thomas yelled and Alex started defending his point.

“It was! Your macaroni is awful anyway, anything is better than that!”

“Flooding their apartment is better than my macaroni? I don’t think so you-”

“Both of you please calm down and tell me the story.” I said and they both stopped but continued glaring at each other.

“Anyway. After Madison called Jefferson, he also formed a group chat with me, Laf, John and Herc. He asked for our help with the plan as well and we agreed although it was obvious he wouldn’t have texted us if it wasn’t important. We came and John and I thought that turtles would be the way to go but y'know, turtles need water so I got the idea we could also incorporate water balloons somehow.” Alex explained.

“Jefferson got the smart idea that it would be great if we started a water balloon fight and so I had to retaliate. I made the pond so the turtles could get water and so they could gather enough strength to attack Jefferson.” John told me, glaring at Thomas as well.

“While they were doing this, me and Hercules though it was a stupid idea. So I started making spaghetti while they were fighting and Alex knocked the pot of pasta off the stove with a water balloon. So I had to retaliate.” Lafayette explained and looked at Hercules.

“While they were fighting I was trying- key word here is trying- to make a dress. I was almost finished with it when Laurens had to come in and take the dress saying that we had to clean up the water.”

“That explains the mess but… what was the plan?”

“Nothing, it’s stupid.” James said quickly and I frowned.

“Madison have you ever considered this was a part of the plan?” Thomas smirked slightly and James looked at him, frowning.

“The real dress is in the bedroom. Try it on.” Hercules smiled and he grabbed my hand. I looked at them all and I followed Hercules. On the bed was a gray dress, the color of James’s favorite suit.

“What is this for?” I asked him and he smiled.

“Lafayette and Thomas are treating you guys to dinner. James wanted to have it in your apartment so we needed to ruin it to convince you guys to go out.”

“You guys are scary when you team up.” I noted and he laughed.

“I’ll leave you to try the dress on.” He smiled and left. I tried it on and was surprised when it fit perfectly. It was a simple dress but I loved it and I knew James would as well. I walked out of our bedroom and I watched James’s face light up.

“You have a reservation in thirty minutes, we better leave now.” Thomas reminded us and James grabbed my hand.

“Let’s go.” He smiled and we did. When we got to the place, they took us up to the rooftop and poured us champagne.

“What was the plan, James?” I asked him quietly and he looked at me, his eyes shining.

“You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen in my life. And I love you so much. And I don’t know what I would do without you and I want you to be with me forever.” He smiled and he got out of his chair and kneeled down on one knee. “I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Y/N, will you marry me?” I felt tears come to my eyes and I nodded my head.

“Yes.”

The Party

Pairing: Lafayette x reader

Words: 560

Warnings: Mild swearing

Prompts: “Did I just say that out loud?”

A/N: I have a lot of time to write tomorrow so feel free to send in a bunch of requests today or tomorrow so I can get them done before the week starts. (Also sorry for how shit the title is)

You waited anxiously, watching the door for your friend Peggy Schuyler to burst through it with everything for the party tonight. You didn’t want to go, but she said Lafayette would be there and that managed to convince you. Stupid. You cursed yourself, thinking of how you’d have to go through another night of watching girls throw themselves on him.

“I’m here, now let’s go! C’mon!” You snapped out of your thoughts as Peggy grabbed you by the wrist, dragging you into the bedroom.

You stumbled out of the room, finding your way to a mirror. “Oh my god.” You whispered. “And I thought you were just putting random shit on my face and hoping for the best!” You laughed, turning to your friend. She smiled, and grabbed her bag.

“Now we just have to go to the party and look hot.” She took your arm and brought you out to her car, bringing you to her sister’s party.

“Why does Eliza have so many parties anyways?” You wondered as the car parked in front of the Schuyler’s home.

“I don’t know. Probably because she likes hanging out with all her friends in one place?” She opened the door, and you immediately spotted Alex, John, Hercules, and Lafayette.

Damn. Lafayette looks hot. You thought, before Peggy burst out in laughter. “W-What?” You stuttered, blushing.

“I mean I knew you had a crush on him but I didn’t know you’d go around calling Lafayette hot!” She laughed as your blush deepened.

“D-Did I just say that out loud” Peggy nodded, finally able to stop laughing at your embarrassment.

“Oh my god, go talk to him.” She forced, pushing you towards your small group of friends, looking up to give you a strange look.

“Hey… You ok?” John questioned as you nervously walked up to them.

“Um, yeah. I’m fine. I’m totally… Fine.” You breathe.

“No you’re not, you’re blushing like hell and you’ve never dressed like that to a party.” Alex indicated your outfit, which was admittedly not what you normally wore.

“Who are you trying to impress?” Hercules continued, as Lafayette stood up to leave. Shit.

“Laf, no, wait!” You stopped him, and felt your group’s eyes on the two of you as they equally dawned in realization. You even heard John mutter a small “Oh shit.”

“What?” He nearly growled, and you could tell something was bothering him. A lot.

“I- um, well you see… What Hercules said… I-”

“She’s in love with you, dammit!” Peggy cut you off, screaming from across the room. All eyes were on you.

“You love me?” Lafayette asked quietly. You nodded as your face heated up. You two were standing extremely close. “Well, that’s good.” He smirked.

“What do you-” You were cut off by his lips on yours. You didn’t waste a second before melting into it.

After you both pulled away due to lack of air, Lafayette whispered. “I love you too.”

Maybe you should go to more of Eliza’s parties.

Joker/Harley Nonsense

[Just random fluffy nonsense/cheesy scenarios/Headcanons that are totally not serious but I have been picturing the SS versions of them doing in my head]

1. Headcanon: It has become well known that Harley is extraordinary at baking but she can’t cook. There have been casualties. 
“I made lasagna guys! Eat up!” 
Frost couldn’t say anything while Harley was still in the room, so all he could do was watch knowing that he would have to potentially find two more guys to replace Dakota and Gunner.
2. The Joker and Harley totally steal each others shit (but technically most things are fair game). 
“Harleyyyyyyyyyy!” Mister J’s growl came from his wardrobe and I paused in the application of my lipstick.
“Yes, puddin’?”
He came out of his wardrobe looking irritated. “Have you touched my gold rolex watches?” 
I casually turned my body a little bit so he couldn’t see how pretty they looked as cuffs on my upper arm. 
“No,” I did notice something else though. 
“Is that… is that my Ruby dream on your lips?” I asked.
He scoffed, “It’s red.” 
Walking over to him I gave him a kiss. “It looks better on you anyway.” 
“You did take them you little-”
“They look better on me!” I danced away from him before he could grab me. 
3. Harley has a big appetite that Mister J finds amusing, impressive, and disgusting.
4. Harley is a cuddler, Mister J is not. When Harley cuddles Mister J he is like a cat, a hissing, growling little cat. 
5. Harley keeps trying to find something to bake that Mister J really likes. When she does he never admits to liking it, but he will shoot anyone who tries to have any.
6. Harley wears a pink fluffy rabbit onesie around the house. 
7. Harley bedazzles Mister J’s things in a way that he is cool with.
8. Harley bought Mister J’s purple cane.
9. Sometimes they do the odd domestic thing that makes Mister J irritated but he also doesn’t mind it. 
Sticking my earring in I walked into the bedroom where Mister J was getting ready for the club tonight. Walking over to him, I put a hand on his shoulder so he turned.
“What?” He growled. 
Silently I undid a few buttons of his dress shirt, fixing his chain so the latch wasn’t hanging down. 
“Get off,” he grumbled. 
Smirking I placed a kiss on his cheek, wiping the lipstick I left behind with my thumb. On my way out I stole one of his jackets, hearing him sigh audibly. 
10. Mister J is the one who tattooed Rotten on Harley’s face and you cannot tell me otherwise.
11. Harley keeps bringing home kittens and Mister J keeps getting Frost to take them back. 
12. Mister J has a ten second limit (sometimes shorter), a person can look at Harley for usually ten seconds and if they exceed that they dead.
13. Mister J has a daddy/sir kink
14. Mister J is also big on the BDSM, he digs handcuffs. He is almost always the dominant one but he is always pleasantly surprised and intrigued when Harley tries to get the upper hand.

Random Mchanzo AU

Ok, this one has some background to it. Basically, just a werewolf AU. But, with Hanzo’s “Okami” or “Lone Wolf” skin.

Somethings before I start.

- Hanzo (with either skin you prefer) is a werewolf Hunter

-Mccree is the werewolf and he transforms every night, though he’s only hostile on Full moons.

-they’re both still in Overwatch just with these two things added on.

 So like, Hanzo joins Overwatch and everyone’s used to Mcwolf by now, so they forget it. Then, One night Mcree Playfully pounces on Tracer or something and Hanzo freaks out like “OMG WHAT IS THAT I THINK MY WEREWOLF SENSES ARE TINGLING” Then he shoots Mccree in the leg with his bow and makes him pass out. He’s then told that he was just playing and that that was Mccree not some random wolf, and he goes into full depression mode. Mccree the next day is still hurt and Hanzo is in his room, feeling terrible for shooting him. Mccree finds this out and goes into his room to make him feel better and then they smooch and get better cause I’m a sucker for happy endings.



CAN SOMEONE PLEASE DRAW THIS HOLY SHIT

More modern day AU Jojo shit to get off my chest.

>Dio one time being sick in the morning, and Vanilla panics and googles ‘morning sickness’ and pregnancy comes up and all can be heared from Vanilla’s room is inhuman screeching. Vanilla later confronts Dio on the matter and inatantly gets a punch to the face for being so fucking stupid.
>Terrence buying Minecraft and Dio playing only to find Jotaro also playing on the same server as him. Grief wars ensue.
>Jotaro and his crew getting Snapchat and and Snapchatting eachother when they’re staying in hotels like ’*takes a pic of their room* this is what my room looks like’ ’*takes a pic of the trash bin* hey look I found Dio’
>Dio’s Vines becoming viral and Jotaro trying to figure out how Vine works. Kakyoin somehows understands random shit so helps Jotaron out and they mostly vine shit on their travels like 'HEY DIO ON OUR WAY TO KICK YOUR ASS! *all the guys shouting 'YOOOOOO!’*’
>Instead of shouting or ringing a bell, Dio using Twitter to message his servents to get him stuff. They all have really dumb user names like Vanilla is ’@coolerthanice’ Dio’s is ’@bloodsuckingbastard’ and Terrence’s is ’@thatsabaseball’.
>More Twitter shit, Jotaro and gang also have Twitters with stupid usernames like Jotaro’s is the more obvious ’@yareyaredaze’ buy Kakyoin’s is ’@manilovecherries’, Abdul’s is ’@toohotforyou’, Jean’s is ’@theshiniestchariot’ and Joseph’s is ’@grandpajostar’

My mother took advantage of being in an area that had cell service to call and implore me to find her an earlier flight off the island knowing full well it took hours to get her current flight out. I shit you not that she said “I’ll go to Canada if I have to.” But I was super lucky and booked her a flight to Chicago, a room at the airport hotel, and then of course it was easy to get her a flight back home from there. So my mom is coming back home a week early and we’re all very much relieved, especially her.

macerelle  asked:

Bellarke and 'being camera shy plus some unexpected hand holding' Thanks so much this + happy holidays!

The first time Bellamy Blake meets Clarke Griffin, he’s eleven and she’s seven and absolutely terrified of the mall Santa.

Bellamy’s been kind of worrying about the Santa thing, if he’s honest. O wanted to come to the mall to inform Santa he didn’t get her what she wanted last year, and tell him to do a better job this year. Which is not going to work, because their family doesn’t have any more money this year than last year. As a kid, Bellamy sort of got that Santa was never going to get him a pony, but Octavia thinks she deserves one, and if she doesn’t get one, she’s going to be an asshole in the coming year.

So, yeah. He’s possibly looking for some kind of distraction when he spots the girl alone in line, looking like she’s about to cry or bolt, he can’t decide which.

“Stay here, okay?” he tells Octavia, and goes over to the girl. “You okay?” he asks.

She startles, and then glares with fierce blue eyes. “I’m fine.”

“Yeah? So, you want to get your picture taken?”

“No,” she says, too quickly. “It’s weird. If I’m not supposed to talk to strangers, why would I sit in one’s lap and get my picture taken?”

“It’s not a stranger,” he says, trying not to smile. “It’s Santa.”

“Santa’s not real. Mom just wants the picture for her Christmas cards.”

“Where is your mom?”

“At work. My nanny’s supposed to be watching me, but her boyfriend works at the coffee shop so she said I could wait by myself.”

“Huh. Well, I’m here with my sister. You want to wait with us instead?”

“I don’t know you either,” she says.

“I’m Bellamy. My sister’s Octavia. She wants to tell Santa he’s a sham, so you guys should get along.”

“She thinks he’s real?”

“Honestly, I’m not sure. I think maybe she just wants to yell at someone.”

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anonymous asked:

bruh that post about anakin getting high off the force is so wicked thing lmao imagine like they fuck off to an ancient jedi temple or something and kenobi is trying to explain some shit and anakin is just. So high (kenobi finds him sitting in a room alone floating like 100 random artifacts around and he's just like 'anakin....... wtf') kenobi would think it's cute af tho lbr - cat anon

!!!! anon listen listen i am literally dying of that post and i want to write something based off of it so much because the whole premise is So Incredibly Relevant To My Interests i might combust

and kenobi would be fascinated by all that, oh my god. of course he’d think it’s cute (because of course) but then he’d want to understand why anakin’s reacting like that, how the whole thing works, he’d probably be affected by it somehow as well because of their bond, oh mannn i’m gonna fukcign

BOY WITH HORMONE [Kim TAEHYUNG x READER] Pt. 27

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 5.5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 8.5 | 9 | 10 | 10.5 | 11 | 12|13|13.5|14| 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28

Genre: angst/fluff

Length: :D

Summary: You and taehyung are childhood friends, but things happened to Taehyung and changed him. You get to be his classmate in High School, but he end up embarrassing you in front of the class, and this end up you being bullied. HS ended and now you’re in college. Will you finally be free from the bullies?

Warning: Swearing

Part 27/?

Gif credits

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