When I first moved to NYC my first job was waiting tables in Times Square. It was terrible. I had been a waiter for years. Sometimes a person will stiff you. But here, you would get stiffed many times a shift.
One day I had a table of two. They were the absolute worst. They sent every soda, drink, french fry, you name it back to the bar/kitchen. They would yell for me while I was clearly talking to other tables. After about 90 minutes of being the worst and spending about 65 bucks, they didnt tip me anything. They also left a huge mess on the table and a giant puddle of sprite and mango margarita on the ground. So as i’m on my hands and knees cleaning up, wonderig how much more of this shittiness I could take (i walked out about three weeks later) I noticed the girlfriend left her really nice scarf on the chair. The rags i needed to clean up the sprite/ margarita were about 4 feet away from me, and her scarf was within arms reach. So i used her scarf to dry up all the sticky puddle she had left behind.
She came back about five minutes later, she asked if she left anything. So naturally i pretended to be dumb and eventually remembered “oh is this your scarf. oh, i found it……in that puddle under your table. have a nice day” and then I handed her this dirty, sopping wet scarf and continued on with my life.