This is another Rise appreciation post:

Honestly, they are so amazing. Life is fucking bullshit in my head 9/10, but whenever I scroll through social media stupidly, and see a post talking about their new album or a live video with a new song, or just Tim’s speeches it gives me the strength to go on. And I am so thankful they exist. So if anyone else is in a bad head space remember you’re a part of this pack, mate. And there is something awesome to look forward to

RA Challenge P4

 ♡ #7 Something you brought because of RA?


Oooo there has been a few…. a few of my best purchases where probably my Thorin Oakenshield Pop Funko figure, which I brought from eBay, I was so lucky because I got it at such a fantastic price and now they are really hard to find, it is something that I will never sell as apart from DVDs it was my first piece of merchandise that was directly related to RA.

Secondly was my little Red Dragon cuddly toy (the one that Richard was seen with at SDCC 15) as sad as it sounds it was something I had proof that he had and I wanted it too, I spent ages looking for that exact one and when I had almost given up I found it, so again it’s something I brought becuase of RA and is special to me.

The third thing is slightly more recent, I have a chamilia bracelet (similar to Pandora) and I realised I had nothing that really represented what/who I liked, so I corrected that and found the most amazing charm that meant something to only me but also symbolises something he had done (Even though I could  not go and see it) and that was a little heart charm that had the words ‘love love love’ on the front so again something I brought because of Richard. (although i’m sure there is loads more… those are a few that have meanings to me)

4

Even though he experienced suffering that would break anyone’s spirit, he couldn’t disappear. That is why he gave birth, in order to overcome the endless suffering… to countless versions of himself. And by the time the prison itself rotted away, they began to act… To bestow countless deaths upon people.

Responses to childhood trauma.

Our therapist mentioned a while back that there are common responses to childhood trauma.  The obvious ones being fight or flight. But she said three others were freeze, submit and attach.

I don’t think I understood at the time but looking at my system now I can see examples of all of these responses in system members.

They’re pretty self explanatory I guess but I just wanted to share this for reference if anyone finds it helpful, like I have.  I think these are even more relevant in dissociative disorders such as DID because there are often conflicting feelings towards abusers - we are often attached to them despite their abuse.  For us that has been one of the most grueling things to admit.

I know freeze is very common, in later trauma/abuse as well as child abuse. It often happens when fight/flight can’t happen and is when a child will become silent and still, anything to avoid drawing the attention of their abuser. It comes with a sense of powerlessness.

If the freeze response doesn’t work, the child can “submit” by going along with whatever the abuser is doing, in the hope that if they comply it will be over quicker/they won’t be punished. This can be seen in animals - they “play dead” and hope for the attacker to leave them. Submit parts often feel a great deal of shame and take on the blame/responsibility for what has happened.

It is apparently common to have alters who represent these trauma responses within the same system. I can now see all of the responses in our system, for example, fight presents in hypervigilant alters such as protectors, flight can be seen in those alters who distance themselves from external people to avoid being hurt, freeze is obvious in very scared/traumatised/often younger alters who can be stuck in the trauma, submit parts can feel shame or appear needy, whereas attached parts have a fear of being abandoned/always try to be better.

I’m not sure if this will help anyone but it helped us to figure out why certain alters act in a particular way/believe particular things.