I’ve never seen the maturation of a woman as a negative thing,“ she answers with a tight smile when asked about aging in Hollywood. "I’ve never seen a woman stepping into her more powerful self as a negative.” She leans forward in her chair and chooses her next words pointedly. “But this conversation perpetuates the problem. Why are we talking about how women look? Why do we value beauty over contribution? We don’t seem to value beauty over contribution for men. It’s simply not a conversation.
For women, there are undoubtedly great difficulties in the path, but so much the more to overcome. First, no woman should say, ‘I am but a woman!’ But a woman! What more can you ask to be. Born a woman, born with the average brain of humanity, born with more than the average heart, if you are mortal what higher destiny could you have? No matter where you are nor what you are, you are a power. Your influence is incalculable.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
Sure, I’m sad, but I’m not looking to soothe that sadness by replacing it with a new relationship. Women are allowed to be sad, and they’re allowed to be single, and they don’t need to hear that one day a man is going to make it all go away by telling her she is good enough again. She’s good enough as she is.
Charlotte Green, Stop Telling Me I’ll Fall In Love Again
To me, feminism is about believing in the power of a woman as much as you believe in the power of anyone else, and believing in our strengths and the things we can do, and knowing we’re just as powerful, competent and strong as anybody else. Sometimes, people misconstrue it as anti-something, or making it exclude some things or kind of reverse it on women going against each other, but that’s not what this is about; it’s about our equality, it’s about knowing our value.
I cannot hide my anger to spare your guilt, nor hurt feelings, nor answering anger; for to do so insults and trivializes all our efforts. Guilt is not a response to anger; it is a response to one’s own actions or lack of action.
Audre Lorde, from “The Uses Of Anger: Women Responding to Racism”