quotes by george carlin

A person of good intelligence and sensitivity cannot exist in this society very long without having some anger about the inequality - and it’s not just a bleeding-heart, knee-jerk, liberal kind of a thing - it is just a normal human reaction to a nonsensical set of values where we have cinnamon flavored dental floss and there are people sleeping in the street.
Boy, these conservatives are really something, aren’t they? They’re all in favor of the unborn. They will do anything for the unborn. But once you’re born, you’re on your own. Pro-Life conservatives are obsessed with the fetus from conception to nine months. After that, they don’t want to know about you. They don’t want to hear from you. No nothing. No neonatal care, no day care, no head start. No school lunch, no food stamps, no welfare, no nothing. If you’re preborn, you’re fine. If you’re preschool, you’re fucked!
—  George Carlin, Back In Town (1996)
Religion has actually convinced people…that there’s an invisible man, living in the sky, who watches everything you do, every minute of every day.  And the invisibly man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things he has a special place full of fire, and smoke and burning and torture, and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and scream and cry forever and ever, til the end of time. But he loves you.
—  George Carlin