You want to love him in a way in a way that didn’t hurt & now you know that isn’t love at all. sometimes, you still want it. Meanwhile, all the blue in the world is burning, even if you won’t look at it.
— Yves Olade, from “Something I’d Lie About,“ published in Kingdoms in the Wild
Lie was a really hard song to write. I was in the studio with Lido and we were working on that song. We were at Capitol Records sitting at this grand piano in this big room and it was really silent. We had just started hanging out again after going through the breakup and [we were] trying to make music together again. It was really, really hard to be in that room and to hear it echo and to say ‘If you don’t love me no more, then lie.’
Halsey on why Lie was the song that hurt the most to write
Try everything that seems interesting to you. Don’t worry too much, and when you do worry, at least make it fun while you do it. Surround yourself with as much love as you can, and try to put some good into the world while you’re here because life is short.
“This sounds really dumb,” she said with a sudden violence. “Really, really dumb! But it’s––” she groped, helpless, then sprang to her feet, unable to stay still.
“It’s like––there are all these things I don’t even know!” she said, pacing with quick angry steps. “Do you think I remember what I looked like, learning to walk, or what the first word I said was? No, but Mama does! And that’s so stupid, because what difference does it make, it doesn’t make any difference at all, but it’s important, it matters because she thought it was, and… oh, Roger, if she’s gone, there won’t be a soul left in the world who cares what I’m like, or thinks I’m special not because of anything, but just because I’m me! She’s the only person in the world who really, really cares I was born, and if she’s gone…” She stood still on the hearthrug, hands clenched at her sides, and mouth twisted with the effort to control herself, tears wet on her cheeks. Then her shoulders slumped and the tension went out of her tall figure. […]
“You’re wrong, you know,” he said softly, and held out his hand to her. “It isn’t only your mother who cares.”
Voyager Chapter 22 All Hallows’ Eve
“Don’t you see, Mama? He has to know––has to know he did it, he did what he meant for us.” Her lips quivered, and she pressed them together for a minute.
“We owe it to him, Mama,” she said softly. “Somebody has to find him, and tell him.” Her hand touched my face, briefly. “Tell him I was born.”
Voyager Chapter 23 Craigh Na Dun
“It’s verra fine to see ye, Claire,” he said softly. “I thought I never… well.” He shrugged slightly, as though to ease the tightness of the linen shirt across his shoulders. He swallowed, then met my eyes directly.
“The child?” he said. Everything he felt was evident on his face; urgent hope, desperate fear, and the struggle to contain both.
I smiled at him, and put out my hand. “Come here.” […]
“My… she…” His voice was hoarse with shock. “Daughter. My daughter. She… knows?”
“She does. Look at the rest.” I slid the first picture from his grasp, revealing the snapshot of Brianna, uproariously festooned with the icing of her first birthday cake, a four-toothed smile of fiendish triumph on her face as she waved a new plush rabbit overhead.
Jamie made a small inarticulate sound, and his fingers loosened. I took the small stack of photographs from him and gave them back, one at a time.
Brianna at two, stubby in her snowsuit, cheeks round and flushed as apples, feathery hair wisping from under her hood.
Bree at four, hair a smooth bell-shaped gleam as she sat, one ankle propped on the opposite knee as she smiled for the photographer, proper and poised in a white pinafore.
At five, in proud possession of her first lunchbox, waiting to board the school bus to kindergarten. […]
“Tell me about her.” One forefinger traced the pudgy features of the baby in the snowsuit. “What was she like as a wee lassie? What did she first say, when she learned to speak?”
Baby girl he’s going to break you, ‘going to play with your heart and tell you things you wanna hear. he’ll text you late at night and when you ask what he wants he’ll say “cant I just want to talk to you?” and you’ll feel happy and blush and say of course. he’ll d things to you in public maybe kiss you or hug you or lightly sit on you to show everyone else that your his. he’ll call you at the most random times asking to hang out because he wants to see you. he’ll hug you nice and tight and tell you that your his only girl but little do you that as he says that he’s looking at the girl walking right behind you. darling your not special to him, your only going to be a knotch on his belt, a trophy to look back on so he can laugh and everyone he played. your not special but god damn your beautiful and that’s why your his target. you have something he can brag about. for you its your looks, for her it was her popularity, the one before that her smile with me it was the way I was naïve and ate up his words as he fed them to me. I bet you he hugs he whenever he sees you? he does doesn’t he? I bet he even texted you and asked if you wanted to hang out during lunch or maybe he asked if you wanted to hang out at the park after school. he did didn’t he? I wish I would’ve listened to them when they said he was gonna hurt me. so don’t even let it cross your mind the thought of “changing him” or maybe thinking “your different” who knows maybe you are maybe h genuinely likes you. I don’t know, but I will say this. be careful. because that boy is only going to break your pretty little heart in two…
Finally finished reading Rogue One: Catalyst by James Luceno, or as it’s also known by:
Lyra Erso: Badass;
Lyra Erso: They Could Have Easily Created Parallels Between You and Chirrut+Baze in the Film Instead of Ignoring Your Existence;
Lyra/Galen OTP Fever: How to Write a Strong, Balanced Couple While Still Giving Them Relationship Hurdles;
“I’m Thirsty for You and Your D, Galen,” Screams Krennic Into the Rain
with foreword by Galen Erso, “Who Is This? And What Does He Mean By My D?”
and annotated by Lyra Erso, *The dickbag is talking about the Death Star, honey.
Tarkin/Krennic: Hux/Kylo Ren Got Nothing On This Hate Couple
and finally: Jyn Erso Is A Normal Human Child: how this makes her future character arc 1000x more painful
NB: Have only seen the RO film and have now read this book. This is going to be long and about 90% quotes related to characterization.
Writing was okay. Not great, but not bad. (This is especially apparent since I’ve just started reading the RO novelization, and the difference in quality is pretty startling.) Nice quick read.
Lyra is fantastic.
Galen is pretty interesting.
Jyn is adorable and normal, and it breaks my heart.
Krennic is… wow, I just want to laugh because he’s so absurd but also a Terrible Human Being.
Tarkin is fascinating (see waaaay below for details).
No one holds this bitch down.
“She had no recourse. She wasn’t built to hold things in; to be complacent or compliant.”
“Some of Orson’s remarks had made her wonder whether she and Galen were under surveillance, or even whether her personal comlink might be bugged. But she didn’t care either way. Orson may have drawn the line in the sand, but she would be the one to step over it.”