Viktor Nikiforov is the dork we love.

My favourite Viktor moments are when he is an adorable idiot.

I love exploring Viktor’s character because despite being the most senior character among the skaters and being seen as the one to chase and look up to, this boy truly does a lot of stupid things. To be fair, 27 is still quite young. It’s a shitty age when everyone plus their dog seems to think you know what you are doing except you. I can tell you all the weird decisions and unnecessary drama people have and get into at 27, but then this post will never end.

Now, we know about the whole banquet fiasco and the whole impulsively flying to Japan arms open, dick out thing, not to mention the whole car park “let’s shatter his heart” shenanigans, but I also have these screencaps stewing for maybe a month in my phone because I remember I was rewatching the show and these just made me go, “Oh, Viktor.”

Okay, so we know Hot Springs on Ice all started with Viktor’s idea…

…to which Yurio gamely accepts the challenge and issues his own (while Yuuri adorably panics in the background like the puppy he is)…

…which Viktor also accepts.

Look at him all excited.

Here, though, is where Viktor gets himself in trouble:

He’s been riling Yurio up the entire morning that the kid just up and threw a tantrum and demanded this prize. But then, no problem, since it’s not like Viktor had to accept or anything–

Yuuri’s face when Viktor agreed, though.

*sigh* Same, Yuuri. Same.

It seems that it’s not until later that Viktor realises the trouble he put himself in. At this point, we didn’t know yet just how invested Viktor was in Yuuri Katsuki (i.e., very invested and nursing a weird kind of crush, probably) and how important it is that he doesn’t coach just anyone, but Yuuri Katsuki only. How ever good Yuuri could potentially be, however, there was still a big chance that he could actually lose to Yurio. Yuuri sometimes choked during competition. Yurio, on the other hand, was the juniors gold medallist. There was a very real possibility that Yurio would win and Viktor to have to go back to Russia.

Having realised this, Viktor then began to sport this face:

Yeah, tell me about it.

This is Viktor during Yurio’s performance:

At this point, Viktor didn’t know yet that Yuuri had a breakthrough on his Eros performance. As far as he knew, Yurio was the one who found his Agape. While Yurio’s performance was not perfect, he was doing well enough. But Viktor does not want to go back to Russia. He wants to stay in Japan and get to know Yuuri Katsuki. He can choreograph for another skater, sure, but he does NOT want to be Yuri Plisetsky’s coach.

That, right there, is what Viktor Nikiforov looks like when he knows he is in very deep shit.

What’s interesting though is that these expressions were not really blatantly pointed out in the show. No one notices this, and Viktor just stands in his corner looking like that. With what knowledge we had at episode 3, we don’t know, maybe he just looks thoughtful because Viktor Nikiforov is just a mysterious character. Lol, but rewatching this after season 1 is over?

Yeah, Viktor. Because of you, for about an entire episode, we were in danger of never having the events that would lead to the kiss at the Cup of China, the exchange of rings in Barcelona, and the glorious masterpiece that is Yuuri’s record-breaking free skate. Viktor, Viktor, Viktor… sometimes just… *facepalm*

Thankfully, Yuuri DID find his Eros at the last minute, wins the competition, and consequently saves Viktor’s gorgeous but impulsive arse and gives us the wonderful events of season 1. Thank you, Yuuri! ♡

Lol, look at how happy and relieved this dork is:

There he is, ladies and gentlemen, our Viktor Nikiforov - king of impulsive decisions. For a long time we thought he was such a mysterious character. Now, we just… wtf, we know him better and we love him very much, but sometimes

Viktor, no. For fuck’s sake.

*sigh* Same, Yuuri. Same.

Bonus: Viktor during Yuuri’s Eros performance. He probably realised he’s safe at this point, and I bet he was enthralled again, and possibly getting turned on by Yuuri Katsuki falling in love again.

Oh, Viktor.

on a rainy day
  • <p> <b>john, pointing at the window:</b> fucking gay, man<p/><b>alex:</b> uhm you really shouldn't use the word gay to describe something bad - gay is not synonymous with shitty and, quite frankly, the weather can't even be gay cause it's no-<p/><b>john:</b> i was pointing at my reflection, dumbass<p/></p>
“Mad Dog and Puppy” English Translation

Here it is. I apologize for the delay, but various circumstances got in the way. Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

From Haikyuu!! Light Novel 6, Chapter “Mad Dog and Puppy” written by Kiyoko Hoshi with illustrations by Haruichi Furudate.

Introductory page 

Attached illustration on page 129:

Mad Dog and Puppy

One fine holiday in fall, there was a man standing in a convenience store nearby Aoba Jousai High School. The guy, wearing a volleyball jersey, walked out as the opening and closing door made an electronic sound. The man’s name is Kyoutani Kentarou, a second-year member in Aoba Jousai High’s volleyball club.

Kyoutani tore the wrapping of the chicken—chicken is his favorite food—that he took out of the convenience store bag before sinking his teeth into it, making an audible noise; this was how he walked toward school. The volleyball club took Mondays off. Practice starts morning today, which is a Sunday.

Kyoutani had not attended the club for quite a while since the middle of his first year due to various circumstances, though he has been recently thrown into the spotlight for coming back after being recalled by Oikawa, the team captain.

At the preliminary round of the Inter-High Miyagi Finals in June, Aoba Jousai suffered defeat at the hands of Shiratorizawa Academy, the invincible champions. It was necessary to regroup and reorganize the currently completed team in order to clear themselves of the disgrace come the next Spring High School competition, move on from second place and aim for the Nationals. What they wanted to strengthen in particular was their offense. The fighting strength that served to be the trigger of that was Kyoutani, whom Oikawa jokingly called “Mad Dog.”

Keep reading

So to retaliate against all my saltiness, my brain brought up something quite pleasant that I hadn’t noticed before.

Sexiness is practically non-existent in the Halo universe.

Like, probably the closest thing we have to sexy is Cortana, and she’s not even portrayed as sexy, she simply has the appearance of a nude, young woman. Yet her nudity is never brought up. She’s considered beautiful, not sexy. 

Halo has few female aliens (which they make up with a near-equal ratio of male/female human characters), but those few female aliens we have seen don’t even have breasts or “feminine” traits. We had a book cover featuring a female Sangheili and her chest was completely flat (which is a blessing, considering Sangheili are based off reptiles.)

Armor is completely gender neutral, and it wasn’t until the Spartan VIs that the armors appearances gained more personality. And even then….

One of these Spartans is a woman, can you guess which?

And then there’s my favorite bit: the topic of beauty. Sexiness doesn’t play a role in Halo, but beauty most certainly does. Of course, we all know Cortana’s considered beautiful, but you know who else is considered beautiful?

This is Isabel, a new character to be featured in Halo Wars 2, and this is the commentary given by Craig Drake, who painted the game’s posters:

“I’m elated to contribute my visions to the Halo Wars 2 universe. It was an honor to depict Decimus’ crushing brute power as well as Isabel’s intelligence and beauty.”

By many accounts, Isabel would probably be considered pretty, not beautiful, but Halo says otherwise. 

The majority of Halo’s women are not conventionally beautiful; they’re old, they have eye bags, unfull lips, and “too” big noses, all the traits that mainstream media teaches us are ugly. And yet not a single one of these women are deemed ugly by the narrative. They’re all unique with vibrant personalities, all beneficial to the story - their appearance does not define them and yet they are all so beautiful.

Halo has done a quite a few shitty things to their women [side-eyes Halo 3 and Halo 5], but they have such a progressive and natural way of depicting them that I don’t think I’ve seen in any other video game, and it’s why Halo will always be my favorite. 

Totally forgot about some pics I drew long ago for the fandom challenge. My memory is shorter than one of a goldfish.

”Do whatever you want”. Among my various pairings and fanons with Maul there is one including him having some kind of ust and admiration for Ahsoka. Don`t ask how, I don`t know.

Ohhh my gOD the tag is empty, I’m just gonna start yelling random ass headcanons into the void, feel free to add your own.

- Jack has all the hudsons bay Winter Olympics team Canada mittens
- Once Ransom, Holster, and Bitty are gone, Nursey and Chowder team up to make the kegster playlists
- Parse has all the choreography to toxic from the just dance video game memorized
- Jack and Ransom both really like the Arrogant worms and will occasionally loudly yell the cow song (maybe the war of 1812, I haven’t quite decided)
- Shitty will belt “the good ol hockey game” by stompin tom at weird times. Once he did it when he and lardo were making out and she didn’t talk to him for the rest of the day.
- Jack is like Carey Price in that he’s probably unironically worn a cowboy hat
- Chowder really likes Neapolitan ice cream
- Snowy is allergic to cats
- Ford doesn’t have her drivers license, mostly because she’s never needed it but also because she doesn’t want to get a car and deal with even more car brand name jokes
- Jack is a big fan of adidas slides
- Bitty’s favourite ages to work with at summer camp are 6 and 7 year olds or 14+ year old teenagers

“Rum & Coconuts” - h.s. Part 1

Lemme just write this real quick lololololololol



Harry was listening to Savie only around 50% as he sat in the booth overlooking the busy London traffic as the rain fell rather heavily outside. Under normal circumstances, Harry would have been an ideal listener to his and your mutual friend, but as she continued to talk on, Harry slowly started to zone her out.

But it was for good reason as he waited once your dark blue car pulled up across the street, parallel parking before he watched as you struggled with your umbrella inside the car before opening your door and letting it out. You clutched your jacket around yourself as you looked both ways before crossing the street and then jogged over to the cafe where Harry and his friends were sitting.

He got up from the booth, mid-sentence from Savie, and opened the door for you as you bustled in. You’d come straight from work, just as Savie had, but you definitely looked more stressed than she did.

“Hey,” Harry chcukled, taking your monstrosity of an umbrella from your hands as you attempted to fix your hair and get it out of your face.

You stopped for a moment, looking up at and smiling through your windblown mess of a mop of hair as you couldn’t hold back the smile. Harry’s eyes crinkled in happy acknowledgement as he leaned down and pressed his lips to yours briefly.

“Hi,” you greeted back, biting your lip as you admired his adoring face.

“Ugh,” Savie groaned, breaking whatever cute moment you and Harry had planned to let linger. You poked your head from around Harry’s broad body and waved to Savie.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

you should honestly try harder with your english it's quite shitty

Honestly english is my third language, I also draw, sing, am an actor, I’ve also won a free college cause Im so damn smart that I didnt need to pay for it, I am also VERY successful in every fucking thing I do. 

 So I need to ask for you, AMAZING PERSON THAT CAN WRITE ON ENGLISH RIGHT to fuck yourself :D Come here and talk to me in my three languages and I may take you seriously.

 I SHIT to english. It is not the most amazing-perfect-beautiful language in the world. Is not my obligation to know it perfectly. I DONT CARE :D I only speak english here cause most of the guys here speak english cause it is MORE EASY (you can read my language is harder for you to learn).

 You ppl are really arrogant, u really think non natives should not just speak your language but also do it perfectly. Guess what, GO YOU AND LEARN SOME LANGUAGES LAZY ARROGANT ASS :D

 You should honestly try harder with yourself, you are not half of me, its quite shitty. 

anonymous asked:

Electricity is out! Mc with the RFA members when suddenly lights out for a quite long time.. at their s/o house? (what will happen in there is up to u to decide, even nsfw totally fine lolol)

(some of these are very lightly NSFWish, others aren’t- it’s signalled next to the character name!)


  • He was at MC’s place, playing LOLOL in his laptop while MC browsed their phone next to him
  • his laptop was quite shitty. the battery was probably dead, and it only worked while charging
  • which means that when the power generator went boom and the house went dark, so did his laptop
  • screams
  • it got so dark so quick that he and MC almost fell off the couch
  • he’s super pissed because all the progress he made is now lost
  • but MC distracts him from that and starts looking for candles
  • he chooses his favourite scented candles that he and MC find in a cabinet and uses those to light up the living room
  • he’s a bit anxious about the whole thing, but being with MC like this is… nice
  • the room smells nice and everything is candlelit, and he and MC are cuddling on the couch
  • it’s super relaxing?? he usually dislikes it when power goes out but this is way more enjoyable
  • they fall asleep like that, all cuddled up on the couch
  • (psa: don’t fall asleep with lit candles children that’s a fire hazard don’t be like yoosung and MC)
  • When they wake up, the power is back on
  • and also it’s super late. way too late
  • Yoosung has to rush back home- he has school tomorrow ffs it’s 2 am why did this happen
  • still, he can’t concentrate later, not due to the sleep, but because he keeps wanting to go back and cuddle MC like that instead of sitting in class

Jaehee (NSFWish)

  • sometimes, when jaehee drops by MC’s place, it’s to catch up with stuff
  • talk a bit, cuddle in the couch, have coffee or tea, stuff along those lines
  • it’s usually at night; she’s pretty busy during the day, plus she can drop by on her way home
  • sitting on the table, she’s eating some cookies while chatting with MC
  • and suddenly she can’t see?
  • everything is dark
  • she drops her cookie and calls out for MC
    • “MC? Are you ok?”
  • MC replies, completely unharmed
  • oh the lights went out
  • using their phones’ flashlights, they walk around the house
  • the tv won’t turn on
  • nor any light
  • phones won’t charge
  • no internet
  • pretty much no electricity it seems
  • MC tells Jaehee she can go home- after all, she’s probably going to get bored sitting in their dark house for more time
  • Jaehee refuses and says they’ll keep MC company until the lights come back
  • sitting in the bed with legs crossed, waiting, is pretty boring though
  • one thing leads to another, and suddenly, there they are; laying in bed, tangled in each other, kissing heavily
  • it’d have gone on for longer since Jaehee can get affectionate when alone
  • but the lights come back and snap MC and Jaehee to their senses
  • blushing, MC bids Jaehee goodbye and wishes her a good day at work tomorrow

Zen (NSFWish)

  • visiting MC is his duty as their boyfriend
  • he feels guilty he hardly gets to see MC sometimes, and always tries to make it up by buying MC a little gift or treat when he drops by
  • today is no difference
  • he brings a rose to MC, and greets them with a smooch
  • he knows it’s quite late and apologices (he’s a gentleman!), and tells MC that he won’t overstay his welcome
  • zen you could never overstay plz
  • the intimacy starts even before the lights go out
  • it’s night and the beast is released, what could one expect?
  • on the couch, limbs tangled together and lips leaving small hickeys where they land
  • groans and moans echoing through the house
  • they don’t even notice the lights go out
  • they’re way too busy
  • busy going at it
  • after they’re done, MC notices something
    • “Zen, isn’t it super dark, or…?”
  • they realise the lights went out but they didn’t realize bc they were fucking
  • it’s half amazing, half embarrassing, and entirely comedic to Zen


  • visiting MC isn’t that usual
  • mainly because it’s mostly MC who comes to his place, not the other way around
  • still, he really likes MC’s place
  • it feels homey
  • somehow more than his penthouse
  • it’s hard to fit time to go there in his schedule, which does means most visits are around nighttime, but it doesn’t really matter
  • MC likes to sit down and watch “commoner TV programs” with him, and he finds himself enjoying that time too
  • except when the TV goes black mid-episode
  • the lights go out too
  • Jumin knows what happened, but he’d never really been in a blackout for long. he had emergency generators in C&R and his house- but MC doesn’t seem to
  • he’s a bit interested in what to do as MC gets some candles and battery flashlights
  • he does tell MC to sit down because he worries walking around in the dark like that could make them trip or something
  • it ends up being a long chat with Jumin
  • for some reason, being in the dark with some candles seemed to get him in the mood for talking
  • he tells some childhood stories, and tells stories about V as a child- which are rare
  • finally, when the lights come on, he tells MC that next time he’ll bring some wine in case this happens again
  • also, he does say that if it does happen again… maybe he’ll decide to do more than chat


  • he’s the type who would say he’d drop by MC’s place whenever but. he’d actually always ask first
  • also, MC offers him dinner
  • he can’t turn down food he needs real food as much as he denies it
  • the moment he knows the night will be great is when the lights go out
  • MC is apologising and looking for flashlights
  • ?? mc please you didn’t choose to have the electricity go out chill??
  • in order to pass the time without electronics, Seven knows there is only one way
  • Only One
  • MC is very suspicious when he asks them to bring out all their blankets
  • and when they do, Seven clumsily starts making a fort in the darkness of the living room 
  • suspicions: confirmed
  • … not like MC can complain because they join in on making the blanket fort pretty quickly
  • it’s a bit off for a fort, but hey, it was made in total darkness so it’s ok right
  • nothing beats the feeling of proud wave of emotions when both MC and Seven crawl into the fort and cuddle there
  • also, with the battery he has left on his phone, Seven makes everyone in the RFA freak out when he sends a cryptic message that gives everyone the wrong impression
    • “Hey guys I’m at MC’s place… the lights went out… we’re having fun in the blankets ;)”
  • Zen is screaming but he would never guess MC and Seven are being dorks in a blanket fort
“Worries” Part 2

Word Count: 1,116

Daryl Dixon x Reader

This is part two of “Worries”, which you can read HERE

Summary: When Negan takes Daryl in as prisoner, he has more than a few words about Daryl’s relationship with you.

Warnings: A lot of Swearing (lol Negan is in this what do you expect)

Thanks for requesting a second part, anon! :)

We’re on easy street, and it feels so sweet…”

That song, playing on repeat, was driving Daryl insane. The only thing he could think about was getting out of that cell, escaping, and seeing you again. But of course, that seemed impossible since he was locked away, being forced to listen to the same song over and over again, eating dog food sandwiches.

“Get up.” Dwight opened the door, sunlight streaming into the once pitch dark cell. Daryl winced his eyes at the sudden change of light, but didn’t move to get up.

“I said get the fuck up, now. Negan wants to see you.” Dwight says again, and when Daryl doesn’t move, he grabs Daryl by the arm and forces him to walk down the hallway.

“Aha, exactly who I wanted to see.” Negan turned around from speaking to one of his many wives. Daryl grunts in response, and Dwight lets go of his arm.

“We gotta have a little chat.” Negan sets his drink down. “It’s about your precious little whore, Y/N.”

Daryl’s attention is fully on Negan once he mentions your name, even if it’s in a bad way. He hadn’t heard anything about you since the night of the lineup. He didn’t even know if you were alive, or if you were okay. All he could seem to do (besides plan escaping) was worry about you.

“Dwight, ladies, you mind giving us a little goddamn privacy? Fuck, I don’t get any respect around here.” Negan sighs, setting Lucille down on the table. They all hurry to leave the room, making Negan smirk in response. He loves being listened to, being in control.

“So, Daryl.”

“What?” Daryl manages to make out, his voice a little dry from not doing anything but crying and yelling for the past few days.

“Every time I am in Alexandria, all I get is dirty looks from that girl of yours. Let me tell you- that is not fucking cool, but damn is she a babe!” Negan laughs. Daryl gives him a dirty look, not liking that Negan was blatantly hitting on you. He’s very protective of you, and he hates when anyone even looks at you in a way that’s not friendly. But he knows better than to say anything to Negan.

“That ass, mhm, that’s a sight to see. I bet that pussy is great, too.” Negan taunts Daryl, and seeing by the look on his face, its working.

“She’s real lonely without you there. I offered to make her one of my wives, keep her company all day, fuck her brains out. She rejected that offer real fucking quick, seems she’s still hung up in you. Won’t be for too long. Not with all of those strong, younger men out there.”

Daryl wants to pick up Lucille from the couch and bash in Negan’s head like he did to Glenn and Abraham, but he somehow manages to keep his cool.

Despite all of the times that you have tried to reassure him that he didn’t need to be insecure about the age difference, he couldn’t help but let it get to him sometimes. Between everyone at the camp bothering him about it and his own worries that you would lose interest in him, he was very insecure about the situation. Typically you were the only person that could reassure him that everything was going to be ok and calm him down, but you weren’t here this time.

“She wouldn’t.” Is all he says.

“You sure about that, buddy? You’re an old ass man. She’s a hot ass fucking babe, ten out of ten. She’s going to leave you sooner or better.”

“She won’t.” Daryl grits through his teeth.

“Oh, I’m sorry, did I offend you?” Negan puts his hand over his heart. “I did, didn’t I?”


“I could see why you’d be bothered by it, shit, I don’t blame ‘ya. She’s way out of your league. Surprised she’s not with that little serial killer- he’s only a few years younger than her, isn’t he? Or even with Rick. At least he’s got something going for him, being the, quite frankly shitty, leader of you guys.”

“Shut up.”

“Nuh-uh,” Negan shakes his finger. “You don’t get to tell me to shut up, or I will toss you right back into that fucking cage you just came from.”

Daryl sits there, unsure why Negan even called him out there. If it was just to taunt and tease him about you, than he would rather go back into the cell.

“Why am I out here?”

“I got bored. Decided to take the shit out of ‘ya in a different way than torture. I gotta say, this is way more fucking entertaining.” Negan laughs. “I’m just busting your balls, you can relax. I think its damn cool you can score someone like that. Even in the apocalypse. Shit, I’d even go as far as sayin’ I’m proud of ‘ya. She seems to really like you, for what reason I have no goddamn idea, but she does.”

“Please let me see her, I need ‘ta see her.” Daryl begged.

“You know I can’t do that.”

“Ya took Carl here, showed him around. Bring Y/N here.”

“Beggin’ me isn’t gonna do shit.” Negan shook his head. “Dwight!” He yelled, and the man came inside the room.

“Yes, sir?”

“Take him back. Done with him. He’s too goddamn sensitive.”

“No, no, no please, let me see her.” Daryl was about ready to explode, between the anger built up from this conversation with Negan, to that stupid song playing over and over again, to being stuck in isolation.

“Too bad so sad.” Negan waved them off, and gestured for his wives to come back into the room.

“Let’s go.” Dwight forced him back into the cell, pushing him to the ground.

“I want to see Y/N.” Daryl says before the door is closed shut again.

“Sorry, old man.”

The door shuts again, leaving Daryl alone again. His mind is still reeling from the conversation with Negan, making him more upset by the minute. The only thing that calms him down is remembering your voice telling him that you love him, and your beautiful face. You’re the only thing that gets him through the day and that gives him the strength to keep on.

We’re on easy street, and it feels so sweet…”

i can’t hold my liquor like how i hold these memories, one drink is good enough for me. i can’t smoke like how you can, one blunt gets me high for a week, i really don’t need for you to rub it in, i enjoy feeling numb every now and then. you wanna know what i can do more than you? take painkillers like they’re skittles, it’s sweet to feel nothing. does it numb the pain or numb the memories? i forget. drugs on the dinner plate, i eat more to forget. it’s no way to live, but it’s the only way that i’ve been living. i promised that i’d quit, i’m really shitty with promises forgive me for that too. i see the stars tonight, they’re pretty. yeah, i’m kinda fucked up, but at least im responsive. some day, i won’t answer back, some day i won’t need drugs to thin away the feelings. some day someone will remember me as the sky turns pale, someone will write about me some day and it’s going to be kinda sad, but isn’t that life? if we were happy all of the time, how will we ever know true happiness? if you’ve never been exposed to the truth, how will you ever know you’re being lied to? i’ve got so much on my mind and i just want to get away from here. some days i can feel the end creeping up on the calendar, some days– i can breathe it in like an old cigarette and it’s a reminder that this is nothing, i’ll get over this too. some day. i’ll be over you. but not today. i’ll numb today.



I swear man, I only listened to that mp3 like once. Now I can’t shake it. It’s like the hook of a top40 song…just stuck in my head all the time.

I followed the instructions though, so before I listened to the file I went and had a really good workout at the gym. I was lifting heavy…I mean it’s nothin compared to what I lift now, but I had serious spaghetti arms after that session.

The file didn’t really sound like…like anything. There were some beats and I thought I herd a little mumbling in the noise but I couldn’t really hear nothin

The next morning I woke up. Damn I was sore. My shoulders could really feel my time in the gym.

“Nobody lifts so hard that they’re sore all the time, unless your a Real Jock”. I hear it in my head, just like you’re standing here talking to me. Or was it just me talking to myself?

But I kept hereing that voice is my head. Whenever I’d move a muscle that I’d pushed hard on, I heard it. “Only Real Jocks lift that hard” or “You’re only sore cause your a Real Jock.”

Eventually I started echoing it in my head…then I started thinking it myself, and that voice was just ecoing what I already knew. By the end of the day…i dunno. I just accepted it. I was sore cuz I’m a real jock.

The first thing I thought when I stretched out in bed the next morning was “Your sore cuz you’re a Real Jock.”. It felt good to know that. Comforting, you know?

Then when I was in the shower, I moved my hand down to my dick. But the voice in my head said “Real Jocks don’t have to jerk it”. I’m a Real Jock so I just kept scrubbing down and got out a the shower without my normal morning cum.

I moved around my apartment getting ready. I was still achy all over. My brain kept echoing at me. Real Jock. I’m a Real Jock.

When it told me that Real Jock’s take a gym bag to the office…I didn’t even ask why. Its what Real Jocks do.

And cuz I know that Real Jocks take a gym bag…shit I must be an even realer one cuz I had a gym bag. And my muscles ached.

I took a long lunch and hit the gym, cuz real Jocks lift when the gyms not busy with casuals.

And I made sure to eat, cuz Real Jocks need fuel for their body.

Fresh new soreness was showing up on my hard worked muscles. Only a Real Jock gets sore from lifting that hard…

That night I stopped by the mall. Real Jocks want to show off their body…so I bought a bunch of tighter jeans and muscle fit t-s and tanks. And I picked up some new undies to, cuz Real Jocks only wear bright colored underwear.

After getting another 1500 calories in, I pretty much collapsed in front of the TV. A basketball game was on, and I watched it cuz I’m a Real Jock, and Real Jocks all watch sports.

And then at nine I went to bed. It’s like the first time in years I went to bed b4 midnight. A Real Jock needs his sleep.

The next day I loaded up my gym bag and went over lunch again. I pushed major weight…a Real Jock needs to push as hard as he can. U don’t push hard, you don’t get sore, and only a Real Jock pushes so hard he gets sore.

The days kinda bleed together now. I quit my shitty job - eventually they got sick of me taking long lunches. Now I’m the afternoon bartender at this ritzy hotel…I don’t gotta come in until one so theres lots of time to lift in the morning.

Shit…you just slid a room key across the bar. I knew u wanted my ass. Everyone does. And a Real Jock doesn’t need to jerk it, he gets fucked as often as he can. I’m off shift in twenty minutes…I can’t stay long tho, I gotta run home an sleep after. A Real Jock needs his sleep.

I doubt we’ll see eachother again after you dump your load in me. Unless…

How long r u in town for. I need a lifting partner, and u were just telling me you worked out earlier today.

Once I’m stripped down to just my brite orange briefs…I’ll ask…

Do u wanna be a Real Jock?


Hey…I wanna put on some music before u fuck me.