quest models

Tiny Tiny Cave Walthrough-- ‘How to get Ardent Blossom’

Ok guys, so obviously there are some weird spoilers ahead, so if you don’t want to read any of them, DON’T READ THIS!!

ok, so here we go.

Around 5 pm on 3/18/2015, Kotaku released this article

Basically, it details this SUPER SECRET HIDDEN CHEST that is FULL of secret rare things. All you have to do is jump on a tiny cave in the Emerald Graves.

SO, I really wanted to try this out, mainly because I had not heard anything about that weird tiny cave, and I think the Emerald Graves is my favorite map in the game (it is just so dang gorgeous), and it’s not like I had anything else better to do on a Friday night but jump on a tiny fucking cave.

The tiny cave in question:

look at that cute-ass little sign.

This sweet, weird little cave is found here in the Emerald Graves:

The key to triggering this insane quest is jumping like crazy on the tiny cave.

All hail the purple moose.

I think I jumped around 50-60 times. (Hint: I would make your party hold position right outside of the area, because I kept having Iron Bull all up in my personal space.)

After you jump around 30 times or so, you will start hearing this voice coming from the tiny cave. I was in a fit of frenzy last night, so in my haste, I did not write down what the voice said. However! after you jump on the cave some more, you will get a quest to find 10 Crystal Grace. I already had 7 in my inventory, but I found the remaining pieces in these places: Note: you can ONLY find Crystal Grace in the Hinterlands.

After gathering the Crystal Grace, I went back to the little voice in the cave, and they got REALLY EXCITED! then they started muttering something to the effect of “ Stairs, the stairs, they’ll be there, THEY’LL BE THERE”, and then, nothing.

After this, I briefly tried to think of places with stairs in the game. The first place I thought of was the Giant’s Stairs in the Western Approach. I don’t know if any of you guys have seen the weird tower there, but I thought it would be a good place to look.

After finding nothing here but booze, tiny farmers and cheese (sounds like a fucking party), i decided to consult the internet. After googleing “staircase dragon age” I came across this Reddit thread. APPARENTLY this little egg had been found a little over a month ago, so good research Kotaku, good research.

ANYWAY the best way to find this little spot is to follow this path in Emprise du Lion:

Because if you try to go to Suledin Keep first, you will not be able to get to it.

Anyway, you will have to follow that little path until you find the veil fire. The Area looks like this:

look at how Dorian models so well.

And HERE is the super secret fake snow wall.

All you really need to do is go through, best do it at a bit of a run if you’re nervous.

On the other side of this fake snow wall you will find a staircase, a super long stair case that goes on, and on,and on,and on, and ON.

Eventually, you will get to the bottom.

and you will find the SUPER SECRET CRAZY RARE CHEST! 

and THIS is what will be inside.

a little bit anti climactic, but oh —-

Holyshitwait… is this a MUTHERFUCKING FLOWER CROWN!?

yes.. yes it is.

BLESS

skingustus  asked:

Azazel and Angel are assigned dish duty, ends up with Angel chasing Azazel around the house/apartment while hitting him on the ass with the wrung up towel whip.

say what you will about angel but she is f e a r l e s s

janos and emma are just like “same shit different day tbh”

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who to fight - xmfc edition
  • <p> <b>charles:</b> he's cute and he means well but he can be kind of an asshole so I'd understand if you wanted to fight him. but you shouldn't. like, he's not a good fighter, and you'd probably get in one decent punch if you didn't think about it too hard beforehand, but he's a telepath. he'll take you out.<p/><b>erik:</b> don't fight erik. its tempting, but don't do it. even if you trap him in a room with no metal, he'll probably still find a way to kick your ass and he'll do it mercilessly. don't fight erik.<p/><b>raven:</b> yeah you probably shouldn't fight raven - unless you're really good she'll most likely beat you. and why would you want to? she's been through a lot of shit, man, leave the poor girl alone. she doesn't deserve it.<p/><b>hank:</b> don't fight hank. I mean, you'll probably beat him unless he gets in a really good kick, or he has some gadget to help him, but what has he ever done to you? don't fight hank.<p/><b>alex:</b> most people want to fight alex. you're welcome to try but his powers are pretty dangerous so you might not win. nobody would blame you for fighting alex though.<p/><b>sean:</b> don't fight sean unless you have SERIOUSLY GOOD earplugs.<p/><b>darwin:</b> don't fight darwin okay SCREW MOVIE CANON that kid can EVOLVE HIS WAY BACK FROM DEATH. if you fight darwin he will win and then probably take you aside to talk about your bad life decisions.<p/><b>shaw:</b> DO NOT FIGHT SHAW. repeat: unless you have a telepath on hand and have stolen his helmet, DO NOT FIGHT SHAW.<p/><b>emma:</b> hahaha good fuckin' LUCK<p/><b>azazel:</b> DO NOT fight azazel. he's a teleporting whirlwind of knives and pure badass. you do NOT wanna fight him.<p/><b>angel:</b> she'll kick your ass then spit acid on your face. fighting angel is a bad, bad idea.<p/><b>janos:</b> the dude can create a whole fuckin tornado with one hand. fighting janos is inadvisable 0/10 would not recommend.<p/></p>