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Bless my heart, a network tv show discusses female sexual pleasure
So, we get to the episode where they use the Bechdel test line. I seriously LOLed at this part because it was so ludicrous. At least they are acknowledging the ridiculousness of pandering to only male fantasy on TV and pointing fingers at it — and using it as a dream and not an actual event is definite kudos. And YES Julia, I saw you go for the spectacular boobs.
The more the series goes on the less it is like the books, but again I think that’s okay because of what they are doing to further the storylines. We have queer characters, we have mental illness, alcohol and drug addiction, etc. AND NOW WE HAVE A DISCUSSION ABOUT FEMALE SEXUAL PLEASURE. Bless my exploding heart, a network television show just openly talked about women getting off.
On top of that, the subject came about really honestly. It is brought up — guy thinks everything is a-OK — girl says actually not really — feelings are hurt, discussions are had, and abracadabra, orgasms all around. Alice was shy about admitting it at first, but who wouldn’t be growing up in that maze of horrors she did…and when she admits yes, sometimes it is hard for her to orgasm and she doesn’t know how to ask for what she wants, all women everywhere watching this show probably cheered. In a world where women are expected (and shown to) orgasm in 2 seconds flat from a bit of gymnastic thrusting, it’s hard to say that you need more assistance in the bedroom department. In the end, she literally grabs Quentin’s hand and pulls it down to where she wants. This is huge. Now, in my opinion, Quentin doesn’t really become a feminist until book three. I’m liking the more evolved attitude on the show thus far. I don’t know how the show runners are going to fit this new attitude into the ending storyline but whatever. When said he was a feminist in the dream sequence I about died. A STRAIGHT WHITE MAN ADMITTING HE IS A FEMINIST ON TV? I mean I know it was his dream and he was watching two hot girls macking but still.
Quentin also handled the whole sex thing better than expected, and very realistically. Imagine what you would do if you are told you’re not doing “it” correctly, your feelings would be understandably hurt. He assumes wrongly he is being a good lover, either because he lacks attention or because Alice is faking, but after a bit of childish storming off he comes back and admits his douchebaggery and insecurity. This is incredible! — Especially for men to watch. It’s not only damaging for women to see on TV that they don’t need foreplay, it’s damaging for men to see that they don’t need to do it, or pay attention — or even that they are perfect lovers right off the bat. No one is. It was also awesome that he admitted he wanted direction from Alice. When she asked if he expected sex to be perfect every time and he said no, that he wanted her to tell him when he was doing something incorrectly, that he wanted her to speak up about what she wanted, it floored me. TV usually shows men just taking pleasure, but he genuinely wants to give Alice pleasure and be a good lover to her. He swallows his wounded pride and accepts her directions, listens to what SHE wants, does those things, and guess what — it works. Communication about sex is so rare in media, it’s even more rare when it involves women speaking up about what they want. I’m so glad they had two characters actually communicate with each other on this subject and do so successfully, with a woman asking for and receiving pleasure, and a man checking his ego at the door and wanting to give it.
Side notes. My baby Elliot is a broken teddy bear who needs a hug. I was genuinely upset that Margot was not there for the speech he gave. He understandably recoils when Margot-Bot kisses him, he’s so not in that place, and he’s not into her. Not sure how he feels now that he knows it wasn’t the real Margot. Yet, he closes right back up and doesn’t tell her what happens. His body language is so heartbreaking, he curled into himself so tight when real Margot sat down, it looked painful. I honestly like Margot (Janet?) and Elliot needs a friend. Hey show people, can the Queliot friendship start now,? You’re way past the deadline on that one. Remember who practically saves Elliot from cirrhosis? It’s Quentin.