queers & allies

One thing cishet allys usually struggle to understand is why LGBTQ+ people are so militantly protective of our ships, canon or non-canon. We’ve received almost zero representation in any forms of media until the past few recent years. Even now we struggle to find any positive representation & have to sift through a myriad of mediocre shows just to find a canon LGBTQ+ ship where the characters aren’t just blatant offensive stereotypes or aren’t tortured/killed for the straight characters storyline progression. It’s so hard to even find a good tv show with a queer relationship on it. Last year alone we lost more than 30 queer characters in mainstream television. We lost so much of the little representation we had and now we’re stuck with like 6 queer characters spread out across all of mainstream television.

Ally is not a word you can take, it is not something you stab your flag into and declare you have earned because you found it. Ally is a word given. A word that is not trustworthy if it only comes from your own mouth.

Ally is a passport; you may travel in these spaces but you must follow the law of the land. The word has no meaning if it has not been approved by the proper authorities. And the authorities are us.

We are citizens of this land and we continue to live here when you have gone home. You can read every travel guide, and know every intersection in our roads, but if you are not a citizen you are a visitor. 

Ally is not a ticket, a pass to sit down and enjoy the show. Activism is not a spectator sport, you are either playing or you are on the opposing team. If you want to enjoy the game you are going to have to shoulder some tackles for the players. Because we have bruises all over our bodies and you are wearing a suit of armor.  

Ally comes with a class. We are the teachers and you are the student. You will listen and will only participate when you are called upon. If you want to be an ally you have to first realize that your voice is not the most important one in the room. You are there to listen, and we will know if you didn’t do the reading. 

Ally is not a part of a gift bag you get for coming to the party. If you want the word you must come to the funerals as well as the parades.  

The word comes with work. It comes with struggle, inconvenience, and time. Ally is something you do. Not someone you are. It is a job, not a title. 

So thank you for your application. We will review it and get back to you in a couple of weeks. 

RePosting this as we enter Pride Month(s)

Pride is something I struggle with to some degree even having come out of the closet. There are days when it’s quite clear that unless I “present” as Trans NonBinary I will not be seen as such.

Some days nobody could stop me from “presenting,” other days it’s an honest chore, and there have been long stretches where I’m too busy disentangling myself from my own dysphoria to grasp what’s going on at all. So accept this friendly reminder:

You deserve to feel proud, year round, no matter what.

If you’re not ready to march - that’s fine.If you haven’t come out - that’s fine.If you’re too broke to go to events - that’s fine.If you’re just not feeling it - that’s fine too.

Regardless of the feelings that can complicate things, I’m happy you’re here. I take pride in simply knowing people like you. That’s enough. You’re enough! <3
DO NOT FOLLOW ME IF YOUR FEMINISM DOESN'T INCLUDE:

• Trans women
• Trans men
• Intersex people
• The LGBTQ community
• Queer people of colour
• People with disabilities
• Autistic and neurodivergent people
• Sex workers
• Immigrants
• Women of colour
• People with mental illness
• The Black Lives Matter movement
• The poor and homeless
• Male advocacy
• Sexual assault survivors (men and women)
• Muslim women (with or without the hijab)
• Jewish women
• Sikh women
• Mothers

Y'know, there’s a difference between acceptance and support.
Acceptance is taking something and saying that it’s tolerable, that you can deal with it.
Support is taking something and throwing your weight behind it. It’s saying that you will be there to embrace and encourage it.

So when it comes to lgbtq+, “I accept you” and “I support you” are two very different phrases.

I'm about to take the "Bi"out of BioWare since that's what they keep doing to their characters.

Dear straight allies: If you’re gonna support us, support all of us. Support trans girls, trans boys, non binary kids, ace and aro kids, pansexuals, bisexuals, etc. Support questioning people. Support lgbt+ people who don’t fit the stereotypes. Don’t just support us so that you can have a gay best friend or brag about your lesbian friend, and then turn around and laugh at “76 genders” memes or invalidate non LG orientations. Support us because we’re humans and we deserve human rights, too. You don’t get to pick and choose who you support.

Things not to say to your gay friends

“Ew I hate gay guys, but like lesbians aren’t gross.”

“Gays are disgusting. Oh! No, not you, you’re the exception.”

“Yeah, I support gays! I just think they shouldn’t get married.”

“But you’re so pretty……………… For a lesbian:)”

“Oh yeah you’re a lesbian. But like, wouldn’t you hook up with this guy??? He’s so hot am I right?!”

“I’m sure it’s just a phase. I remember when you used to have a crush on this boy [blank] years ago.”

“You’re totally my best gay friend. But like not my best best friend. Get it? Out of all the gays you’re my fav.”

“If I were a lesbian I would toooootally do you.”

“Yeah being gay is totally okay as long as you don’t rub it in our faces.”

“You’re a feminist, of course you’re gay!”

“I don’t feel comfortable with you discussing anything that is related to the lgbt community.”

“But you can’t be Christian now.”

“Wait! You don’t happen to have a crush on me right?”

“Since you came out you’ve been acting more… gay.”

Feel free to add

Gender Fluid Problems

·Sexuality is complicated and confusing and sometimes you never fully grasp that certain identity

·Clothes are either not enough, too much, I don’t know what to wear, I do know what to wear but I don’t own it, constantly carrying a backpack with extra clothes incase you need to gender switch

·Feeling androgynous, but not being able to look or act the part because of the way you’re dressed, features, hair, voice

·Someone misgendering you, making you uneasy, but not wanting to correct them every single time you feel the need to

·Love Life is NOT easy when it comes to introducing/explaining yourself as their significant other

·Dysphoria especially when you hate your physical appearance for not matching with the gender you want to be right that second, but knowing you won’t actually make any physical changes due to liking the way you look in another moment

·Often has a change of names and can’t really settle on just one

·Not 100% knowing where you fit in with the community

·Feeling upset when your masculinity, feminity and androgynous or agender qualities/aspects/characteristics are all imbalanced where one outweighs more than the other two

·You can’t relate to specific stereotypes or jokes within certain communities anymore

·Sometimes the people who are closest to you are too cautious where they don’t know how to interact with you anymore

·Periods (in general) during a more masculine or gender neutral day

·Shopping is always difficult because gender roles are still an issue and some people give you wary/judgemental looks if you so much as bend one

·Being described as tomboy, butch, or on rare occasions a girly girl, etc. is irritating to deal with because sometimes you do feel as if a label fits or you’ll just have the urge to (do) deny it which makes the other parts of you feel a tad guilty.

·Introducing yourself at work or formal outings

·Miss, M'aam, Mister, Sir

Girls/Girls/Boys (Girlfriend Version/Cover)
Ally Hills
Girls/Girls/Boys (Girlfriend Version/Cover)

I don’t wanna hear you’ve got a boyfriend
Sometimes you’re better of alone
But if you change your mind,
you know where I am
Yeah, if you change your mind,
you know where to find me
But I don’t ever wanna meet your boyfriend

And never did I think that I
Would be caught in the way you got me
Push another guy aside and just give in

Girls love girls and boys
(sophisticated, manipulated)
Girls love girls and boys
(sophisticated, manipulated)
Never did I think that I
Would be caught in the way you got me
Girls love girls and boys
And love is not a choice

Pose, you gotta save your reputation
They’re close to finding out
that I’m your girlfriend
But if you change your mind,
you know where I am
Yeah, if you change your mind,
you know where to find me
But I don’t wanna save your reputation

And never did I think that I
Would be caught in the way you got me
Push another guy aside and just give in

Girls love girls and boys
(sophisticated, manipulated)
Girls love girls and boys
Never did I think that I
Would be caught in the way you got me
Girls love girls and boys
And love is not a choice

I am just a villain
vying for attention from a girl
A girl who can’t decide
and here’s the reason why

Girls love girls and boys
Girls love girls and boys
(sophisticated, manipulated)
Girls love girls and boys
(sophisticated, manipulated)
Girls love girls and boys

And never did I think that I
Would be caught in the way you got me
Girls love girls and boys
And love is not a choice

friendly reminder that shipping isn’t activism or being an ally!!!! not shipping a ship because they’re lgbt means you’re homophobic, shipping lgbt couples is just shipping. it’s not an extraordinary act of support or acceptance, especially when the shipping becomes fetishization. if you ‘love gay people’ please help us by speaking out against homophobia and transphobia instead of staying silent. being an ally is an action, not a label

6

Happy Pride Month! June is coming to a close, but let’s show our Pride for who we are always, every year, every month, every day!
Thank you so much for making this a memorable month, really, it was crazy! Thank you! 

Sorry that I wasn’t able to do all of them, really sorry!