ok so i am neither bi nor monogamous but like…yall bi folks in exclusive het relationships. whats up. why is ur “identity” such a big deal. isnt all that’s saying like…”whenever i leave my partner now, i might not be having sex w ppl of their gender!” isnt that kind of…rude to ur monogamous partner. “just letting you know that in case i break up with you or cheat on you, my options are more open!”
like why is this nebulous idea of u having an Immutable Innate Sexual Identity more important than the things you’re actually doing?? like i understand why a liberal would think that but like….one of the basic tenants of radicalism imo is that Things are more important than Ideas and Actions are more important than Intentions. that’s how privilege and oppression work…
FACT: PANSEXUALS are 30x more likely to CHEAT! have you ever played monopoly with a PANSEXUAL? they’re THIEVING FUCKING BASTARDS! that’s right, PANSEXUALS! i saw YOU take that 500 out of the BANK! DICK!
allow yourself the same affordances u would give a cis person, okay?
does a cis boy wearing eyeliner make him less of a boy? no. and it does not make you any less of your gender to do so.
does a cis girl playing rugby make her any less of a girl? no. and it does not make you any less of your gender to do so.
does anything a cis boy does make him less of a boy? no.
does anything a cis girl does make her less of a girl? no.
AND NOTHING YOU DO MAKES YOU ANY LESS YOUR GENDER EITHER.
i feel like we get told way too much that once we transition/come out, we need to fit into the gender stereotypes of what we identify as. blue for transboys, pink for transgirls, grey and ‘androgynous’ colours (honestly cis ppl are wild) for nb people.
your choices of clothing, makeup, hobbies and literally anything doesnt make you less who you are.
[Image Description: Image is of a light-skinned person from behind who is flicking off the camera. They are seated in a lawn chair at night and they wear a denim vest which reads Queers 4 Satan. Underneath that saying is a pink baphomet. Their hair is about to the length of the nape of their neck and it is mint green, blue and blonde. They also have a braided grey and black rat tail hanging down their shoulder. End image description.]
this was taken by my lovely friend Sarah at her house when she had a party. because sometimes i go to those.
“I lived in the bay for four years and felt all fucked up pretty much the whole time. I was like, I keep going to these house shows and performance nights and readings and there keep being trans people talking about being trans, people keep trying to be nice to me but I keep feeling all alienated and invisible, what is going on? Every collective house in the east bay had at least one trans guy and no trans women. It wasn’t until I moved away and started to parse out the way that, like, everything about being trans that I was seeing was about how masculinity is cool, and talking about how packing a cock in your UnderArmour boxer briefs was like brave and empowering. Or endless performances by cis femmes who viewed femme as a kind of trans identity, who wanted to talk about how hot they were for masculinity in their partners. This wasn’t being cool about trans stuff, this was being cool about trans stuff in female-assigned trans people, and then assuming that that coolness was relevant to male-assigned trans people too. If you do the math thing where there’s a four on each side of the equals sign so you can erase both of them, then look: this is expecting patriarchy to affect men in the same way that it affects women.”