queer love action

anonymous asked:

Hey Emy, I don't think this is a popular opinion but I sometimes wish that Brian never said "I love you" to Justin because he has always shown his love through actions, which counts more than words. Maybe it could be their own unique way of saying "fuck you" to conventionality, and of celebrating their love for one another? That being said, I still love that scene and the proposal even though I wish they took a different direction with the execution of the final season.

I get it, I do. I think one of the things that makes the Brian/Justin relationship so special is we could feel how much they loved each other, even without saying them saying the words, which isn’t the case for a lot of fictional relationships. Their love for each other shown through in every look, touch, and action, and that’s something really special to get to witness.

But I still think it was important for Brian to say those words, for a couple of reasons. First of all, because it was important to Justin to hear them, which is entirely valid. But also because it’s really about more than just the words themselves. Everybody knows Brian loves Justin, including Justin. Everybody sees it. But so long as Brian doesn’t say the words, he has an escape. If something should happen – if Justin leaves, or if Brian fucks everything up, or their relationship somehow implodes and leads to the type of pain he always said love induces – he can continue to hide behind the “I never loved him” facade. He can pretend Justin never meant anything to him, that he’s entirely unaffected by their relationship, that he’s still the same man he always was. 

But by explicitly telling Justin he loves him, Brian is taking a huge step in his emotional growth. All his fears he’s had about love, all his anxieties about relationships… they don’t matter anymore. Neither does his need to always be the one in control nor his desire to smother any sign of weakness or vulnerability. Brian is completely, utterly, irrevocably in love with Justin, and he’s not allowing fear to force him to keep that emotion hidden any longer.

That’s why I personally think it’s super important Brian ultimately said the words. Not because romantic couples need to say “I love you,” because as we’ve already established, everybody and their mother (literally) knows Brian loves Justin more than anything. But because it showed that the last of Brian’s walls that prevented him from fully opening up to another person. Brian’s entire journey in QAF was about getting to this point, where he can truly drop the Brian Kinney Persona and just be Brian, a man with a huge heart who learns to trust people in ways he never has before and be emotionally vulnerable with them and not care about the consequences. 

I do totally get what you’re saying, even though I respectfully disagree. However, I have no doubt that even though the words have now been exchanged, Brian and Justin will continue showing each other just how very much they love each other every single day for the rest of their lives. <33