q: not feeling well

Update: Sick…

We are all sick, and to be honest the flu sucks, and I have to go close tonight! :’( Good thing Gwen switched shifts with me, or I would of had to open instead. I got sick first and then got sick last so I can take the shifts she can’t make.

I had an interview for Assistant Inventory Operations manager. Basically doing what I was doing for far less money than I should.

And Gwen applied for the lead budtender possition, since it opened up this last week. And I am fairly sure she is going to get it.

Stella is doing very well!! They took out one pin and reset the brace so she is good and healing.

The bus conversion is on pause till we do a massive trash run. We haven’t found a legal dump site that is affordable. So we may have to pay for a junk yard visit which is expensive.

And the next step is solar panels. The first set up will give us 2000 WaH and my goal is 6000 Wash for the finished project. But it is $1300 for the 2000 WaH system. It will allow us to use an electric heater, run a mini fridge, a drill and some minor appliances. With our paychecks we should be able to cover most of the system I just am worried about having to set up a support system for the solar panels. Some just use adhesive.

So that is how everything has been going! Thank you all so much for your support! If you want to continue in helping us convert our bus into our home, our PayPal is littletransgirl18@gmail.com With best, healthy wishes, Ember, Kimmy, and Gwen Stella, and Nova @emberbrekker @spideygirl @gwennspacey

i am going to lose my shxt.

thursday and friday my stomach wasn’t bad, but my throat is so sore, swallowing is super painful. the doctors office doesn’t open until 8:30, so i have to wait two hours to see if i can hopefully go in today. i don’t have a fever, but i looked in my throat as best i could and it’s really red and puffy & my glands are so tender/swollen, they hurt. i barely slept because of it. i was really hoping i was going to magically feel better this morning but nope. i am not supposed to take anything because if the gastritis so i am kind of panicking. i have been trying to be positive but frankly i am in a terrible mood because i am sick all the effing time anymore. people are frustrated that i’m not well and i feel terrible about that too. we are supposed to celebrate my sister’s birthday this afternoon and our little pseudo nephew’s this evening and i’m not sure i can do it.

like, what the hell am i doing wrong that this keeps happening?

what the actual fxck? 😣😔😭

sorry for ranting and being cranky. frustration is pretty much at a high i just had to at least get it out.

TMI ALERT. Woke up at 3am to the worst diarrhea. Sometimes you eat crap and your body just flat out rejects it. That’s what I get for eating a mountain of ravioli and Alfredo sauce last night.

Usually I take my dog on a morning walk at 5:45, as you can see I’m an hour off. I should have been getting ready to leave right about now.

Contemplating taking a half day today from work in the morning just in case my bubble guts come back.

I just want to say I’m sorry if your requests are taking so long.
I don’t even have a lot - But I’m really not feeling good these days.

Like absolutely not.

I keep having mood swings that are starting to make me angry, I could just wake up as the happiest person of thid world and second after just curl myself up and cry for no reason. This makes me so mad, I don’t understand what’s hapenning.

I don’t remember when it started.
I just remember feeling like complete garbade for a whole week when my mouse Lapis died.
My roomates are both gone, I have no decent internet connexion, I’m constantly feeling like I’m gonna cry.

And now my Rat Steven is not feeling well and I fucking have no idea of what’s happening with him. Like, he eats and drinks like normal but he’s slow and can’t walk properly and I don’t know why. He’s litteraly the same but…weak ? It’s so scary. I guess only the vet will know.

I litteraly have nothing to feel better so I keep staying on my couch wondering wtf is hapenning. There’s no one, I don’t know whay to do.

You’ll probably get some drawings today. I guess ?

Thor 3 thoughts...

I honestly feel like I’m drowning and I’m terrified. The movie franchise I’m most obsessed with and always think about when I’m sad, depressed, happy, nervous, etc. And have been attatched to for the past 4 years Is being torn apart in front of me and there’s nothing I can do but to sit back and watch Marvel destroy it.

I don’t mind the Hulk/Banner being in the movie. In fact it’ll be kind of fun if it was a cameo/a couple quick scenes. It’s the fact that he’ll be the second main character that’s slowly sucking my soul out. Really? The hulk? You forgot about all the under developed characters in the Thor franchise and you decided to go with the Hulk, who as far as I’m concerned, has NOTHING to do with the Ragnarök storyline and is only probably gonna be in the movie for comedic purposes… Oh yeah, because “Ragnarök” (NORSE APOCALYPSE) will be the funniest Marvel movie yet! Wooo!

You could’ve picked Loki to be the second main character because maybe, you know, I don’t know, he’s been Thor’s main antagonist and pivotal character to the franchise and to Marvel itself since Thor 1. And because fans have clearly showed you how much he’s loved and wanted. And also because there are so many unanswered questions and deep complex things that we need to delve into more to make the chemistry between Thor and Loki (which many would say is the best Marvel chemistry between 2 characters) even more richer and beautiful.

You could’ve also picked Sif. Everyone can see that she was horribly underused in Thor 1 and 2 and if written better, can have a big impact on Thor and what happens in the story. She’s a badass and has as much potential to be a second main character as anyone else. (She’d also definitely be a way better love interest for Thor than Jane was!)

You could’ve also chosen any of the Warrior’s 3. Hell, you could’ve even picked Vision since he’s been proven trustworthy, can lift the hammer (therefore help Thor during battle), and can also fly. Also, imagine how much depth he would bring to the Thor franchise if he used that smart little brain of his to understand Thor and Loki’s convoluted relationship and try to mend it back together and finally bring unity between them through his logical persuasion and pacifism.

You could’ve made Odin the second main character next to Thor. Imagine how fascinating and intriguing it’d be to have Thor and Odin work together versus Loki and Hela working together and they all face off in an epic climatic ending yet Loki (being a confused antihero and all) decides last minute to join Thor and Odin side by side which could eventually (possibly?) bring the family all back together in a deep wrapped up trilogy that when watching after Thor 1 and 2 can really see how everything tied together beautifully.

But NOOO… let’s ignore all these great potentials and pick the one that would suck out time from the other characters’ developments IN THEIR OWN MOVIE to only give comedic elements and “more smashing” as we’ve seen in Avengers 1 and 2. -_-

This is why I’m drowning.