puts this here why the hell not

anonymous asked:

why are u happy its cancelled? is it problematic or smt

it’s really not that hard to use google but here i guess

  • the creator of the show is ugly as hell. she’s put actors in yellowface before and blamed black americans for holding back the rights of trans people
  • the latinx storyline is revolved around a character played by a white spaniard
  • kala and wolfgang’s relationship is basically the trope of a white man sexually liberating a young repressed woc
  • the show is supposed to represent characters on a global scale and yet somehow 5/8 of the sensates are white lmao 
  • compared a white cop being called a pig to racist, sexist and transphobic slurs
  • it’s ugly
  • remus: sirius, it's valentine's day. james and peter both have dates. you've said no to all 14 girls who've asked you out so far, claiming you already had plans. but you're just sat here keeping me company in the deserted common room. why did you turn down all these girls and what the hell are your plans?
  • sirius, stretching so he can casually put his arm around remus' shoulders: take a wild guess, lupin.
Pewdiepie “Racist” rant

Alright, let’s get something straight here before we get started. I am not slandering the man, my rant is to ALL THE FREAKING IDIOTS SCREAMING HE’S A RACIST. 

In layman’s terms, I’m calling out the people calling Felix out.

Look, do ANY of you even know what racism even is? I bet you don’t. Did he actually use the slur to directly insult a person, that one person or several? Or did he say it while playing a game? 

Because if your answer is ‘while playing a game on a stream…’ then here’s my answer to you.

ITS A GAME! PEOPLE CURSE AND SLUR ALL THE TIME AT A GAME! How in blazes does that make him racist?!

Now, if he was playing a game and directly used it with ill intent toward the player(s) THEN we have a problem. But did he? No, he didn’t. So that tells me, everyone’s being butthurt over something that isn’t even a problem. Making mountains outta mole holes situation here.

And you’re making jackasses out of yourselves. -claps- Congrats, you won the ‘Fucking Idiot’ award.

The n word is just a word, and it has a very bad history. A very bad, bloody history and I understand that completely. But here’s the thing. If its an racist insult for anyone but a black person to say it, then WHY say it to themselves like its a friendly insult? Its NOT an exclusive word for one “race” to say. Its a goddamn word that no one has copyright to. 

Because if that godforsaken word is SUCH a problem then by logic… NO ONE SHOULD SAY IT. And I mean NO ONE. Like I said, its not a special word exclusive to one race. Either EVERYONE gets to say it and everyone puts on their big kid pants and grow the hell up. Or NO ONE SAYS IT and we can be done with the mess.

Its been how many centuries and everyone is STILL hung up on that word? Has harsh as it is… move the fuck on. Jesus.

Now, the reason I’m saying all this is because I personally am just sick and tired that the ‘racism’ card has been used to flag the smallest of shit just because someone got triggered. Unless its an actual fucking problem to be address, that damn card has maxed out its credits a LONG ASS time ago. And needs to fucking stop. Like really. If you pull that crap over the smallest of shit, you look like a fool and deserve a smack across the back of your head. 

Another reason I’m putting my two cents on here, is the amount of bullshit I’m seeing of how people are flipping out about Felix saying such a word and people are attacking his friends

His. Friends.

Why?

Enlighten me.

How in the HOLY HELL do his friends have ANYTHING to do with WHAT HE SAYS?!

Felix is an adult, HE takes responsibility for his actions and no one else. Why should Mark, or Jack or any other YouTuber that is friends with Felix have to take responsibility for his actions? Why?

Go on. 

Tell me why.

Because by that logic, YOU’RE responsible for all of your own friends’ actions. Your best friend in school? Let’s say they’re taking drugs and get caught. By your logic of the YouTubers having to take responsibility for Felix’s actions, you take responsibility for your friend’s choice to do drugs. Not very fair is it? Why should you, if it was your friend’s choice? Makes perfect sense by the logic you’re putting out there for YouTubers to do it.

But it doesn’t make sense does it?

Didn’t think so.

Mark, Jack… every other friend Felix has, they don’t owe you an apology for being friends with him. They can disagree with him and be a little disappointed but apologize to the public? 

Bullshit.

They don’t need to publicly call Felix out for anything for whatever the “fans” want. 

If you honestly feel that way to the YouTubers, you might as well fucking unsub. They’re not gonna cause drama for your amusement and pleasure, to watch them snipe at each other for stupid shit. You can do that on your own time with your friends. And if you do that, then it proves you’re a terrible human being.

So if you’re hoping for that shit to happen then you’re sorely mistaken and can kindly fuck off. They have better shit to occupy their time with than to deal with drama they’re not even a part of.

And with that, I’m done ranting.

Ghost Adventures Starters
  • "I hate the basement. I'm just putting that out there."
  • "I've come a long way to talk to you because I think you're a piece of crap."
  • "Is this spirit being a smartass?"
  • "You look great for being... not alive."
  • "Ghosts don't even like me."
  • "It's cold, it's dark, and it's exciting as hell!"
  • "Are you banging your head on the wall?"
  • "Something is up here, gathering all the power it can."
  • "If this is the portal of hell, why don't you come up out of that ground and get us?"
  • "Here I am in the sugar shack!"
  • "I hope you can hear me up there in the damned attic!"
  • "I can't wait to get locked in here."
  • "Dude, he's kinda creeping me out. No joke."
  • "Have you ever heard of those guys who wear jackets when it's really, really hot out?"
  • "I can't believe they left me out here, all by myself, with this music playing."
  • "Wait, am I standing on his grave?"
  • "I have respect for all spirits... except for you."
  • "I just wanna see where the massacre took place."
  • "This right here is like putting holy water on a demon."
  • "I'm just pumped! Are you guys pumped?"
  • "I smell beautiful."
  • "Do you see that? Because I can't, either."
  • "You have reached your final desination. Hell."
  • "This is tougher than it looks on tv, trust me."
  • "This is beyond dangerous. I don't recommend anybody do this."
  • "It was probably the most dangerous, craziest thing we've ever done."
  • "Hey, we're just lost. We need a place to stay."
  • "Thank you for knocking."
  • "I've got a teddy bear for you!"
  • "Were you stabbed in this room, Sir?"
The Doctors as "My Immortal" Quotes

William Hartnell: “Why did you do such a thing, you mediocre dunces?” asked Professor McGonagall"

Patrick Troughton: “Then swooped he in singing to the tune of a Gothic version of a song by 50 Cent.”

Jon Pertwee: “And den……………..I jumped secxily in front of da bullet!11”

Tom Baker: “U must go back in time and sedouce him. It is the only way.”

Peter Davison: “he put his arm around me all protective.”

Colin Baker: “I need to wear like da hotset outfit EVA.”

Sylvester McCoy: “What was DAT al about?”
“It wuz to blackmail u.” I snarked.

Paul McGann: (AN: if u don’t know who she is get da hell out of here!)

Christopher Eccelston: “You dunderheads!1111111111” screamed Dumbledore wisely"

David Tennant: “I’m good at too many things? WHY CAN’T I JUST BE NORMAL? IT’S A FUCKING CURSE!”

Matt Smith: “STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS”

Peter Capaldi: “I was even upset went to rehearsal with my Gothic metal band, Bloody Gothic Rose 666. I am the leader singer of it and I play guitar”

I’m so sorry.

Dad Pun Sentence Starters

Send one to my Muse, or alternatively send  👍and my Muse will say one to you!

“What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.”
“Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint.”
“A ham sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer. Bartender says, ‘Sorry we don’t serve food here.’”
“Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water? Because he was a little horse!”
“How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!”
“Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was a salted.”
“I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got the sack because I took a couple of days off.”
“How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.”
“Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.”
“'Wow, you’re a fart smella…I mean smart fella!”
“I had a dream that I was a muffler last night. I woke up exhausted!”
“What’s Forrest Gump’s password? 1forrest1”
“Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.”
“What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.”
“How many apples grow on a tree? All of them.”
“Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.”
“I just watched a program about beavers. It was the best dam program I’ve ever seen.”
“Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.”
“How does a penguin build it’s house? Igloos it together.”
“Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.”
“Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating? Because they have no body to go with.”
“Don’t call me later, call me Dad.”
“What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant”
“Want to hear a joke about construction? I’m still working on it.”
“What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho Cheese.”
“Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.”
“What did the grape do when he got stepped on? He let out a little wine.”
“I wouldn’t buy anything with velcro. It’s a total rip-off.”
“The shovel was a ground-breaking invention.”
“This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in there.”
“5/4 of people admit that they’re bad with fractions.”
“Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "do you know how to drive this thing?”“
"What do you call a man with a rubber toe? Roberto.”
“What do you call a fat psychic? A four-chin teller.”
“I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.”
“To the man in the wheelchair that stole my camouflage jacket… You can hide but you can’t run.”
“The rotation of earth really makes my day.”
“I thought about going on an all-almond diet. But that’s just nuts.”
“What’s brown and sticky? A stick.”
“I’ve never gone to a gun range before. I decided to give it a shot!”
“Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they’re so good at it.”
“Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s fine, he woke up.”
“A furniture store keeps calling me. All I wanted was one night stand.”
“I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.”
“Did I tell you the time I fell in love during a backflip? I was heels over head.”
“I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport. I’m just doing it for kicks.”
“People don’t like having to bend over to get their drinks. We really need to raise the bar.”

2

“These are our Ghost Adventures.”

 Overview by @markhamillz[thanks for bringing up the idea for this Ghost Adventures AU!! ;)]

Judy: Is absolutely sure of the existence of ghosts. Mostly because she can communicate with them, and feels a need to help bring them peace.
Nick: Initially only joining for the paycheck, Nick at first dismisses Judy’s claims, but then sees evidence she may be for real. Is slowly starting to be more aware of the supernatural. Also, the crush on the cute bunny helps too.
Finnick: They promised him a paycheck. He still doesn’t know why the hell he’s gotta put up with this bullshit, but the paychecks are good, so he guesses he’ll deal with this insanity.”


Imagine demon!Dean beating a guy up to death because he touched you and he got jealous.

“She’s pretty.” you said softly, trying to hold back the hint of bitterness and pain in your voice. Or jealousy for that matter. You couldn’t blame her, who knew with how many women Dean had been with ever since he became a demon.

“And probably his type. But it shouldn’t bother you now, should it chipmunk?” Crowley raised an eyebrow as the both of you didn’t take your eyes off of the demon playing darts as the blonde waitress gave him another drink with a rather flirtysmile might you say.

“Not now, not ever.” Crowley finally turned to look at you “You are not his girlfriend, (Y/n). Never been, yet you are bothered so much by this. I wonder why.”

You scoffed, turning to glare at him “As if you don’t know. Dean is probably the most oblivious man in the world but you never were Crowley. Why would you use this stupid nickname on me if you didn’t?”

“Guilty.” he flashed you a smile, downing his drink “But he’s no longer the man that you remember, love.”

“Right, so that’s why you wanted me here?” you scoffed “And don’t you dare deny it to me Crowley. You didn’t even blink in surprise when you saw me. You’re letting yourself get caught and sooner or later Sam will come walking in as well.”

“I must admit- the only thing that did surprise me was the fact that moose didn’t come in right after you.” he shrugged “But probably- it’s time to finally put him on track-” he looked at Dean “And make him realize how little he is leaving for just how much.”

“Hell? Oh wow, yes Crowley that really is everyone’s dream kingdom.”

“It is one, nonetheless.” he winked at you and before you could say a thing he had vanished right in front of your eyes. You scoffed at him but didn’t have the chance to question him when you turned your head and your eyes locked with his green ones. And just like always they made your heart skip a beat. Because maybe you were always friends but your love for him was undying.

You held your breath as he set his glass down and raised an eyebrow at you. He said nothing to the rest of them men he was playing with and casually strode towards you “(Y/n)” his voice was as rough but a lot more cold “Fancy seeing you here.” and the smirk on his face made it all worse.

“Is it?” you asked in a low voice and his smile dropped.

“What do you want here?” he asked serious.

“Oh so Crowley didn’t tell you?” you scoffed a laugh “He knew I was on your tracks with Sam, he should be here very soon. I managed to get a lead and thought if I could convince you to come back without him having to hurt himself but… I don’t think there is a point in trying.”

“I told you to stay away.” he shrugged casually, stuffing his hands in his pockets “Not my fault you don’t listen.

“You told Sam to let you go, not me. And I thought there was a chance here but- I was wrong obviously. I’m curious how you didn’t see this coming, or even more that Crowley didn’t speak to you about his plans. Whatever those may be. What happened? Don’t you guys tell everything? Oh no, don’t Dean, secrets are bad, they ruin relationships. We know it better than anyone.” you went from sarcastic to completely serious.

He scoffed, putting on a smirk on his face and rolling his eyes “Don’t care what his game is, I am not his toy. I have my own plans and I’m glad that… he made it easier for me.” he looked

“What do you mean?” you frowned when you noticed the predatory smile on his face “Made it easier by letting me find you?”

“I’ll let you know soon, now follow me and let’s out of here. You’re drawing too much fucking attention with those shorts.” he took hold of your arm, dragging you up as he glared at a few men behind you that had been sneaking looks at you.

“Like hell.” you hissed, snatching your arm from his “Why does it even matter to you? Especially now, I am nothing to you. So what if they look? I am free, Dean, hell they can even touch as much as they want to.” you said angrily.

His eyes darkened as he looked “Let’s go. Now.” he said in a low almost growl but you weren’t having any of it.

“Why?” you scoffed a laugh “So that you can kill me now? Or so that she doesn’t see us talking?” you motioned with your head to the blonde that already had her eyes on you. You tried so hard not to show how much this was hurting you.

“She has nothing to do with this. Come on.” he tugged, holding your hand again.

“Right, of course she doesn’t.” you scoffed “With how many have you been exactly all these months?”

“You’d want to know, wouldn’t you?” a satisfied smirk was on his face.

You didn’t have the chance to speak though because another voice spoke up “Is everything alright?” it was a guy you had seen checking you out ever since you came in.

“Yes, everything’s fine actually. My friend here was just leaving.” you gave Dean a look “How about you buy me a drink and we can talk?” you gave him a smile that made his grin widen.

“Yes, of course sweet cheeks.” he wrapped an arm around your waist.

“You’re gonna lose that hand buddy.” Dean growled, and you both stopped before you could leave.

“Excuse me?” he raised an eyebrow “Did you just threaten me?”

“No, I was giving you a friendly warning.” Dean shrugged with a casual smile.

“Yeah, right.” he scoffed, arm tightening on your waist just to mock the demon and for a second you got scared when Dean’s smile completely fell.

“But you obviously don’t listen very well.” he scoffed and before you could realize it he had grabbed the man by the collarof his shirt and pinned him against a pillar.

“And now- you get to see what I mean when I say that you shouldn’t have done that.” and even if you expected it you jumped when he threw a powerful punch at the man. And the another, and another and another without letting him do a single move. You were almost scared for his life when you saw the mark on Dean’s arm burn that angry red as he kept hitting the guy, blood covering his fist and groans and moans of pain filling the bar along with hushed whispers from other customers.

“Fucking asshole, think you could ever have a piece of that?” he scoffed a laugh, punching more “In your dreams!” another punch “She’s too pure and perfect for a bloody jackass like you. You would never stand a fucking chance.” he growled, punching him more.

You could barely make out any of the things he said after that as the sounds were too much to handle. People shouting, some cheering and encouraging him to keep going. And then you heard her.

“Dean, stop!” she screamed but he didn’t listen to her, as he kept punching with groans himself “Stop! You’re gonna kill him!” she screamed but it didn’t seem to have a single effect on him at the moment.

“Would serve him fucking right.” Dean growled, grabbing his bloody face and making the guy look at you “Do you see that? Do you see her?” he said through gritted teeth “She’s great isn’t she? And you’d really want a piece of her tonight but that would be it. You had some gruesome thoughts for her after that though, didn’t you?” he turned his head to look at Dean “Didn’t you?” he roared and he gave him a weak nod.

“Just like I thought.” Dean smirked “For the first, I’d really just break your hand and maybe face. But for this-” he looked at him darkly and your breath got caught in your throat. If he killed him right there in front of so many people he’d draw all the wrong attention.

“Dean!” you screamed “No, no don’t!” you exclaimed and as surprising as it was for everyone, it caught his attention and he glanced at you over your shoulder. You looked at him with wide eyes, shaking your head in fear.

“Seems like your lucky day, bastard.” he growled “You’re very damn lucky that she can have this effect on me because trust me your death… it would have not been easy. And she would never give you a single glance because you know why?” he smirked in an almost sinister way “Oh you know why.” he laughed, pushing him to the side and he fell on the floor. He looked down at him for a second, smirking before with a roll of his eyes he turned around and looked at the rest of the customers.

He didn’t say a think, he only scoffed at them and walked towards you.

“D” you found yourself whispering as you stared at him with wide eyes “You would have-”

“I should have.” he growled “Hope you fucking understand I am not playing games here, (Y/n).” he grabbed your jaw with one hand and your heart leapt to your throat when he brought his face closer to yours, your lips only an inch away. You knew what he wanted to do but he stopped himself, looking from your lips up to your eyes. He smiled slightly, running his thumb over your lower lip.

“You are mine, and I’ll make sure everybody knows it from now on.” he said in a low rough voice and you frowned. You knew in what way he meant it, you were no fool with what he had almost done but it still confused you. You were always friends and on top of that even if he didn’t care at the moment as a demon… what really held him back from forcing a kiss out of you? IT felt as if for a moment you saw your own Dean flash through his eyes.

“Only. Mine.” he said in a husky voice in your ear and you felt shivers run down your spine when his teeth grazed over it “I’ll wait in the car.” he added and let go of you, almost leaving you to try to recover from the shock.

But you only had another one coming once he’d left and the waitress spoke to you “You are (Y/n)?”

“Why-” your voice was hoarse as you looked at her “You know me?” and the look on her face only said yes, making you realize there was only person that could have spoken about you to her.

Dean. But the real question was why?

Hamilton Characters as ‘My Immortal Quotes’

Alexander: “OMG wut r u doing fuker he shooted angrily I don’t kno wut da fuk r u DOING I SHOUTED ANGRILY.”

Lafayette: “Every1 in the room stated to cry happly- I had saved them.”

Mulligan: “STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS!”

Laurens: “I wuz so turned on cuz I love sensitive bi guyz. (if ur a homophone den fuk of!)”

Burr: "If thou doth not kill him, then I shall kill him anyways!”

Eliza: “He took of my top and I took of his clothes. I even took of my bra. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.”

Angelica:  "Im good at too many things! WHY CAN’T I JUST BE NORMAL? IT’S A FUCKING CURSE!“

Madison: “”.” he said.”

Jefferson: He had a really big you-know-what but I was too mad to care.”

Washington: “You dunderheads!1111111111” screamed Dumbledore wisely as we went.”

Peggy: (AN: if u don’t know who she is gat da hell out of here!)

Phillip: “They chased me but I threw my wound at them and dey tripped over it”

Maria: “Why couldn’t Satan have made me less beautiful?” I shouted angrily.

King George lll: “I started to cry tears of blood down my pallid face.”

The Signs as Makeup 💄
  • Aries: Liquid eyeliner. Because it's fierce as hell but also makes u rage quit, both of which are common Aries pastimes
  • Taurus: nude eyeshadow. Because it seems too quiet and subtle to be beautiful but yet, here Taurus is... I mean nude eyeshadow.
  • Gemini: colorful mascara. Because why? But also, why not? Put it in your brows n push some limits, like a true Gemini.
  • Cancer: white eyeliner. A staple for when you cry but don't want people to know u just cried, much like a Cancer might do.
  • Leo: anything holographic. Because it steals the show and it shines, which Leo's r known to do.
  • Virgo: foundation. You know a good makeup look needs some. It smooths everything out, like a Virgo w bed sheets.
  • Libra: smokey eye. Classic, classy and adaptable, Libra approved.
  • Scorpio: graphic eyeliner. It's mysterious.Who has the time? Who has the patience? So many questions. It's also bold, like a Scorpio.
  • Sagittarius: "no makeup" makeup. So many steps. It's an adventure to get there. which is.... exactly where u started.... life is about the journey, the Sagittarius motto.
  • Capricorn: red lipstick. When you put that on you mean business, and that is something a Capricorn can respect.
  • Aquarius: hair glitter. Bet you didn't think of that. It's cool n unconventional, like an Aquarius.
  • Pisces: green lipstick. It's different. Almost the exact opposite color of what u expect. Pisces has thought about this. It's a statement.
Hearing The Call to Adventure when you’re over 40.

There’s a seriously delightful conversation in one of the LARP fb groups about adventuring over 40. Many of us aren’t 20 anymore, and it seems silly to have our characters not be our own age (or close to it). But they’re still starting characters (as it’s a new campaign), which implies they chose this path recently.

That thread is mostly joking around, but I kind of love the idea of hearing The Call when you’re not a teenager, and starting your in-game adventuring life later as some kind of mid-life crisis, religious epiphany, empty nest reaction, etc.

Which got me to some ficlets, and here’s the result.

“Well, your mother always wanted to be an adventurer - she was a hell of an archer when we were your age - but we got pregnant, and your grandmother needed some help, so we put that life off for a while. But now that you’re off at university, it seems like a good time to pick up the bow again, and go fight evil." 

“There was just something missing, y'know? I mean, I liked being a toymaker, but one day I realized - I really wanted to put on some plate mail, and go fight demons. So here I am, livin’ the dream." 

— 

“Sometimes, relationships don’t work out. She got the business, I get to start the life of adventure I’ve always wanted. Did you know I minored in alchemy? It’s good to get back into it again.”

“Your Aunt Maribel and I had always talked about doing this, when we were girls, but it just never seemed like the right time. But now that Uncle Haro has passed…Mari just wants to get out there and do it. I can’t let her go alone, can I? Someone has to watch her flank on the line, and remind her to keep her shield up.“

"What can I say? Sometimes you fall in love with a mage. When you do, you grab your hammer and you go where he goes. Someone has to keep cute Dukes from flirting with him. Back off, gentry! He’s all mine.”

“Kevin, you’re being ridiculous. I’m not going to fall in love with some Duke.”

“Whatever. I’m not taking any chances. It took me this long to find you, and I’m not letting you go without me.”

“I’m your Dad. If you’re going to go and fight evil, I’m going with you, ‘cause I support your choices.”

“Er…Mom’s heading off to check out some evil gate she heard about. Someone needs to go with her, ok? I squired for her last time, but I just can’t right now. It’s your turn. Make sure she does her exercises, ok? Her back is going to be horrid if she doesn’t.“

"Fine. I’ll handle the evil gate with Mom. But the next time she heads into the swamps to fight some lizard thing, you’re doing it. I freaking hate swamps.”

“His husband left him for an elf. He’s got some anger issues that he’s working through, ok? Better that he work through it on some bad guys.”

“What was that?”
“Undead again.”
“Oh, for the love of..look. They’re a freaking plague, and it’s getting worse. If we don’t want to keep dealing with this, we’re just going to have to go to the source.”
“But….the carrots…!”
“Hang the damned carrots. I’ll hire that nice boy down the street to take care of our field while we’re gone. Clean yourself up and grab your holy symbol. We’re not putting up with this for one more week.”

“Well, I always wanted to see the world. I got a small inheritance recently, and thought, why the heck not? No time like the present, right?”

“If that Sorcerer thinks he can just waltz in here and take over this town, he’s got another think coming!”
“Doris, calm down. We’ll write to the King, and…”
“I WILL NOT CALM DOWN. Sally, I swear, you drive me nuts sometimes.”
“I’m just saying - there’s diplomatic solutions to this.”
“The hell with diplomatic solutions! I WILL END HIM. ”
“Fiiiiiine. Do it your way. End him with fire.”
“Thank you!” *smooches* “Love you. Back when I’m back. He has NO IDEA who is coming for him.”

“What can I say? Adventuring pays the bills. I have a family to support, and turnip farming doesn’t make money like it used to.”

“Hey Phineas - for guys’ night, I have a thought. Rather than just going down to the pub like we usually do…I found a gate. No idea where it leads. Let’s go check it out. Could be fun, right?”
“A gate?”
“Yeah!”
“This is a terrible idea. I’m in.”

“Um….well, this is awkward. You know that Goddess who spoke to me last spring?”
“Oh yeah! Your whole conversion thing. Nice to see you found faith. It’s been good for you, I think.”
“Well, she has something she wants me to take care of.”
“What, like…a message delivered or something?”
“Noooooooo?”
“Seriously? You’re a florist. What does she want you to do?”
“Well, now when I sing, things blow up. That’s good, right?”
“This can’t end well.”

“We left for THREE WEEKS, and Barbarians razed our village. I swear, do I have to do everything myself? I JUST RE-DID THE ROOF, YOU JERKS.”

“He doesn’t think our family is good enough for him? I’ll show him who is good enough for him! My little girl is going to live in a castle, even if I have to conquer it myself!”
“I’m sure he didn’t mean it that way.”
“We’ll see what he has to say when I walk into Summertide with a demon’s head on a spike! Who’s good enough now, you two-bit merchant?!?”

“Your Aunt recently found out that Throgg the Destroyer is that brat she couldn’t stand at the Academy. She’s not taking it well, so we’re going to be off on a trip for a while…”

“So….funny story. You know that favor I owe the Countess? From like 20 years ago? She finally called it in. She remembered that I’m really good with Ancient Runes, and apparently there’s something she needs checked out.”

“I thought you said this adventuring thing was just a hobby, Brianna. Something we did on the weekends.”
“Well, but…y'know…I really like it. I think I could be good at it. I’m getting better with the spear, you know?”
“I don’t even know you anymore!”
“Can’t you just be supportive?”
“Well, but where does it end? First hobgoblins, now orcs…what’s next?”
“I heard about this cursed tomb…”
“Absolutely not. I draw the line at tombs. NO TOMBS.”

“I told you not to date that vampire. Didn’t I tell you? I told you!”
“Let me live, Sergio.”
“Let me unlive, you mean.”
“Ok, that’s just rude.”

“Oh, sure - one good healing spell, and you think you can conquer the world.”
“I can! I have the knees of a teenager again!”

“Grandpa, you’re embarrassing me.”
“What, I can’t visit my grandson while he’s adventuring?”
“Well, I love having you here, and everyone knows you’re a good healer, but…”
“I’ll be fine. I like it here. I think I’ll stay.”

“C'mon, let’s do it. We’ve always wanted to.”
“But…we don’t know what we’re doing.”
“We do! We’ve each read The Book, what….15 times? I know you basically have it committed to memory.”
“I don’t think 'To Catch a Rogue Lord’ was really meant as an instruction manual.”
“C'mon…how hard can it be? You’ve seen the adventurers who come through here.”
“Excellent point. I’ll get my herbs.”

“Honey? There’s a kid at the door. He says you’re the Chosen One.”
“Arrrrgh. We talked about this! Come back later!”
“He says the stars are aligned?”
“Not doing it! Tell him to go away.”
“Oh, and the seal broke. The seal broke, Stephen. It sounds important.”
“But…”
“I’ll pack you a lunch.”

“Call Sharon. She and her stupid birthmark are coming with me.”
“I thought you said that translation of the prophecy was incorrect? Something about a miss-translation of verb.”
“…well, at least if we fail, I won’t have to listen to Karl talking at Guild Meetings about how he was right.”

anonymous asked:

What would the guys do if they hear their crush say "me? who would like someone like me?" because they can't believe anyone would like them

Aw nonnie this is a sad/cute one. I hope this is alright! 

Noctis:

 - Noctis would be able to tell you were feeling a little glum, and when you had a few precious moments alone, he’d ask you what was wrong.
- You would try and brush it off at first, it’s not like you want to burden him with something like that…
- But this would just make the prince feel a bit useless, he’d really want you to confide in him. 
- You’d take a big sigh, and finally tell him. You feel lonely. You feel like a bit of a spare part. Everyone was settling down, even Noctis had his marriage to Luna. But you were just left on your own, as always.
- “Hey, don’t be so stupid.” 
- Stupid? This would anger you, you just confided in him like he asked and he calls you stupid?
- Noct would see how irate you were getting, and instantly feel bad.
- “Wait, that’s not what I meant!” And it honestly wasn’t. When will this boy learn to deal with his feelings and say the right thing?
- “Sorry that I’m bothering you with my stupidity Noctis.”
- “Look, that isn’t what I meant by it!”
- He panics that he’s really screwed this up.
- “Sure! I’m just whittling away for nothing!”
- “Well, yeah because-”
- “I should just get used to it.”
- “What?”
- “I mean, who would ever like me?”
- “I would!”
- There would be silence as you digest what Noctis had just said. 
- “You…? But what about Luna?”
- Okay, now his heart is racing.
- “We are friends, good friends, but this arranged marriage… It isn’t for me. Look, I’ve been trying to tell you… I, well, like you.” 
- His eyes sink to the floor and he plays with his arm band nervously. Now it’s calmed down he is self-conscious and can’t believe he just blurted that out…
- You’re stunned. Noctis… liked you? 
- He finally looks at you, unnerved by your silence
- Damn, have I really over stepped the mark this time?
- “Noct… you like me?”
- You can see little splashes of red colour his cheeks as he answers.
- “Y-yeah I do… is that okay?”

 Prompto:

- Prompto would be heading towards the tent one night, after you had disappeared for a while. He was starting to get worried as to where you were!
- As he gets closer to the tent, he can hear your voice… He doesn’t want to intrude if you were on the phone. Though, it didn’t seem like you were…
- He listens for a bit. He knows he shouldn’t, but he just can’t help it. There was just something in the tone of your voice that made him stay, a little twinge of something like… sadness?
- “I’m not like Cindy, or Aranea, I’m just…not.”
- They are definitely talking to themselves. He realised.
- And then you said it. 
- “But really… me? Who could ever like someone like me?”
- It’s almost like you could hear Prompto’s heart crack.
- No. No no no no.
- He recognises the pain in your voice, he understands the self-doubt, he knows it all too well.
- Before he could stop himself or even think about what he was doing, he’d push open the tent flap and take you in his arms.
- There are tears pooling in his own eyes.
- “You should never, never have to feel that way. Not you. Not someone like you.”
- It’s hard to hear him as his voice is muffled, his face buried in your neck. His grip is tight, and he can’t even think about how forward this might be because he just has to make sure you know you’re loved.
- “I like you, I like you, I like you.” He can’t say it enough.
- His words warm your heart.
- You both sit like that for a while, just holding each other until the tears stop. 
- He pulls away, and gently whispers; “It’s you. It has been for a while now. I really like you.”
- You can hardly believe your ears. 
- Still holding you, he looks you in your eyes still wet with tears, now smiling a little sheepishly.
- “So… what do you say?”

Gladiolus:

- Prompto would be chatting away about Cindy, as usual, and you would roll your eyes.
- “Tch, she’s pretty lucky.” 
- Gladio would hear your mumbling, and fall behind the other three to walk with you instead. 
- “Hey, what’s that?” He’d ask, friendly as always.
- “Well, it’s lucky Cindy has someone to feel that way about her.”
- Gladio would raise his eyebrows in surprise and a little in doubt as well.
- “I’m not so sure she sees it that way.”
- “I guess, but at least she knows she’s wanted.”
- By now the other three guys are just a blip in the distance, walking back to the regalia.
- “What do you mean by that?”
- “Well, just that I’d love to be in her shoes. It’s not like anyone will ever feel that way about me.”
- Did they really just say that?
- Suddenly his strong arm juts out in front of you, preventing you from walking any further.
- You look at Gladio in shock, to see that his jaw looks clenched and he looks kind of… angry.
- “Gladio…?”
- “Is that what you truly think?”
- You nod, unable to do more and he finally looks at you.
- “Then, you don’t realise how crazy I am about you.”
- Your heart skips a beat at his words.
- “H-huh?”
- He retracts his arm now, standing up to face you.
- “Why else do you think I always let you fall asleep on me in the car? Because I love the way you feel in my arms. Or when I always ask you for help setting up camp, it’s because I really enjoy your company.”
- He would stand in front of you now, the familiar smile you know and love back.
- “Honestly, these past few weeks you’ve been driving me crazy, and then you say no one would feel like that about you?”
- He shook his head, his shaggy hair falling into his eyes.
- “Well, I’m telling you now, I do. You don’t have to like it, I’ll understand if you don’t and I’ll speak no more of it. I promise.”
- He tilts his head, fully smiling now at your astounded expression.
- “Well… are you alright with that?”

 Ignis:

- Ignis had noticed you’ve been seeming down lately, choosing to sit in the tent early or sitting in the back of the car in your own world.
- It really starts to concern him, he can’t fathom why you’re feeling this way.
- One night he brings you your food to the tent, seeing if you’re okay.
- You thank him a little despondently, so he sits down next to you and asks if you want to share what has been bothering you.
- Looking into those kind green eyes it’s hard not to start talking about what’s wrong. You knew Iggy was a great listener. 
- So you opened up a little to him.
- “I’ve been watching the others get closer to people lately, Prompto with Cindy, Noctis with Luna for example…”
- “What about it is bothering you?”
- “I don’t know. I guess it just sucks being on your own.”
- “Come now, you’ll meet someone who is just right for yourself.”
- He knows it’s true, even if it’s not with him. Though that thought hurts him more than he’d care to admit.
- You throw Iggy an incredulous look.
- “What? It’s true. You’ll find someone you really like.”
- Oh if only he knew.
- “That’s not the problem. The problem is them liking me. I mean, who the hell would fall for someone like me?”
- Suddenly Iggy’s eyes tighten, and he re-adjusts his glasses.
- He seems… annoyed?
- “Please, do not put yourself down like that. You’re a wonderful person.”
- Huuuuge eyeroll from you.
- “Uh huh, sure.”
- Here comes the generic ‘you’ll get there eventually’ chat.
- “I mean it.”
- “Really?”
- He’s persistent.
- “Yes, you’re funny, gorgeous, intelligent… anyone would be lucky to call you their partner.”
- Well… that you weren’t expecting.
- The fidgeting with his glasses is progressively getting worse, which is unlike Iggy.
- “Why are you saying all of this…?”
- “Because I…” He has to take a deep breath here!
- “I see you that way. And would definitely feel lucky to call you mine.”
- Your heart stops, you can’t believe what you just heard. And he’s looking up at you through those lovely long lashes, and you know he’s being serious.
- Oh my.
- “Iggy…?”
- “I’m sorry if this seems sudden, but please… I have to know how you feel about me.” His green eyes are gazing at yours.
- Oh my.

a short description of every single song in the Lightning Thief Musical
  • Prologue/The Day I Got Expelled: what the fuck is this shit i didn't want any of this help me
  • Strong: your dad isn't a screw up and neither are you
  • The Minotaur/The Weirdest Dream: bye mom lmao/ who the hell is this beautiful chick comin towards me
  • Another Terrible Day: i hate my job and my life
  • Their Sign: i have a lot of questions to ask the gods, and one is "what the hell?"
  • Put You in Your Place: Fuck You: the Musical Edition
  • Campfire Song: the gods are assholes and here's why
  • The Oracle: Moving The Plot Ahead: the Musical
  • Good Kid: i'm tryin my best and everything in my life has gone to shit help me
  • Killer Quest!: we're goin on an adventure to save the world woohoo
  • Lost!: who the fuck thought it was a good idea to put the fate of the world in the hands of two twelve year olds and a goat man? also where are we
  • My Grand Plan: i have a plan and all of yall bitches underestimating me is getting in my way
  • Drive: make it to la or else everything explodes oh look we're almost there
  • The Weirdest Dream (Reprise): howdy hey Grandpa Kronos is back
  • The Tree on the Hill: my friend is dead and it's my fault
  • D.O.A.: Y'all are Trapped: Featuring Dead Musicians
  • Son of Poseidon: i didn't ask for this but i'm still gonna whoop your ass
  • The Last Day of Summer: End of Summer Crisis: Featuring Betrayal
  • Bring on the Monsters: is this over? no? oh well, bring it on bitches

popular text posts + ask memes

❛ i don’t know what i’m doing with my life, but i know i’m doing it wrong ❜
❛ i am so cute and bitter ❜
❛ my life is one part ‘wait’ and another part ‘what’ ❜
❛ my #1 talent is saying stupid things to people and immediately regretting it ❜
❛ i love sleeping to avoid problems ❜
❛ i hate myself a lot but i get offended when other people do ❜
❛ i’m hungrier than the neopet i neglected for nine years ❜
❛ hit me up if you wanna date a piece of shit ❜
❛ we need some new and more powerful swears ❜
❛ i get progressively uglier throughout the day ❜
❛ i’m so miserable, but i laugh at everything ❜
❛ i need something that is more than coffee, but less than cocaine ❜
❛ just because you’re trash doesn’t mean you can’t do great things. it’s called garbage can, not garbage cannot. ❜
❛ 90 out of 10 people agree that math is fucking lame ❜
❛ if you think i’m ugly now, you should have seen me in 2009 ❜
❛ 2010 me would literally be terrified of 2016 me and i love it ❜
❛ i have a rare skin condition called close the fucking blinds ❜
❛ hey babe, i made you this mixtape for valentines day. i don’t know many love songs, so it’s just uptown funk 18 times in a row. ❜
❛ there are people who know me in real life who think i’m straight and that’s really funny to me ❜
❛ i was cursed with expensive taste and a low budget ❜
❛ yo dude i trusted you wtf the fuck? what the fuck?? what the fuck what the ❜
❛ open flannel shirts and lingerie are the hottest thing and nobody can convince me otherwise ❜
❛ i’m the weird dad, wine mom, vodka aunt, and gay emo cousin all in one person ❜
❛ that awful moment when you wake up ❜
❛ damn haha i’m going to have to deal with that sooner or later ❜
❛ are we gonna fucking hold hands tonight or what bitch ❜
❛ people our age have children what the hell i am a children ❜
❛ i don’t like your clothes. take them off. ❜
❛ why am i only motivated to sort my life out at 4 am? ❜
❛ after i die, i’ll probably still complain ❜
❛ people are so petty and then here i am, me, an angel ❜
❛ if i don’t insult you daily, it means i don’t like you ❜
❛ do something with your life that would make a 1950s straight white man angry ❜
❛ i need to get laid… to rest. put me in a coffin. let my soul ascend. ❜
❛ i’m trying to be a better person, but some people are testing me ❜
❛ i’m overstressed and underfucked ❜
❛ i can’t wait to be a piece of shit with a bachelors degree ❜
❛ my emo phase never went away, it just aged like fine wine ❜
❛ my whole life consists of wondering whether or not to make the bitchy comment ❜
❛ i don’t have time for people who don’t believe in aliens ❜
❛ the lack of cuddling i am experiencing right now is upsetting ❜
❛ why do good concert tickets happen to bad people ❜
❛ i can’t play hard to get i’m already hard to want ❜
❛ i’m still pissed off about growing up ❜
❛ if you listen carefully, you can hear me whisper ‘shut the fuck up’ at least once every five minutes ❜
❛ when i die i want my heart donated to NASA so they can finally see what a black hole looks like up close ❜

❛ single and ready to take a 20 hour nap ❜
❛ write ‘nothing is set in stone’ on my grave as both a witty joke and a subtle warning that i will be back ❜
❛ how do people even put up with me like i can’t even put up with me ❜
❛ the opening riff to mr. brightside could literally raise me from the dead ❜
❛ stale cinnamon roll, been in this world too long, too cynical  ❜
❛ sorry, i’m poor. i can’t afford to pay attention ❜
❛ aziz ansari’s voice in the back of my head faintly telling me to treat myself is going to be my downfall ❜
❛ is it too late to wrap myself up like a baby and drop myself off on a billionaire’s doorstep? ❜
❛ my neutral expression makes me look like i’m always in a bad mood which is convenient because it’s usually true ❜
❛ i never run voluntarily so if you ever see me running you should start running too because something is coming ❜

A Beautiful Lie

Originally posted by hothothotgg

2,500 Followers Drabble 

Prompt: “Why does everyone think we’re dating?!“

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Requested by: @bringmesomepie56


“Hey Grandma!” Jensen lays his gorgeous, green eyes on his favorite person in the whole world (other than you) at a family get together. He makes a beeline towards her with his best friend close behind.

“There’s my handsome grandson!” Grandma Betty greets with a big hug and kiss on the cheek.

“How’s my adopted grandson?” Betty boasts hugging Jared as best as she can, considering he’s a giant.

“I’m doing awesome! It’s good to see everyone.” Jared answers cheerfully plopping down on a chair at the kitchen table.

Jensen is extremely relieved to be home in Austin, sure he loves his career but the constant travel takes a toll after a while. His mind, body and soul can only take so much wear and tear.

Keep reading

Unpredictable

Requested: Nope

So the reasoning behind this imagine is because I sinned really bad and read this incredible imagine, which you can go read here and it got me in the feels. sO basically it made me want to write an imagine like that just without all of the sinning ofc. But if you do go and read that imagine, good luck, I’ll see you on the other side.

Also please give me feedback! It’s really appreciated! Plus let me know if you’d like a part two, I’m willing to write one for this imagine.

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Description: Your brother is Harrison Osterfield, and your his younger sister (by like a few months, which he always teases you about which results in you both arguing), Tom is Harrison’s best friend, you’ve known him forever, but recently you started to feel different around him, making you rethink everything and worry about what Harrison would do if he found out the truth.

Warnings: Swearing, mentions of drinking

Word Count: 2,992

A/N: So it’s almost 4am, and I’m in the feels, and Tom just posted that picture of them in the hot tub. You’ve been warned.

Originally posted by tomholland-trash

“Hey Y/N, Tom is at the door can you go and open it?” Harrison shouted down the hallway, making you let out a loud groan of annoyance.

“He’s your best friend, why can’t you let him in the god damn door.” You yelled back, refusing to get off the couch as Tom patiently waited outside.

He could hear you both yelling back and forth, the usual banter between the two of you.

Harrison stormed down the stairs, sending you a glare, which you gladly gave a condescending smile back at him.

“Hey man! Sorry about that, Y/N wouldn’t get off her lazy ass and open the door for you.” Harrison spoke the last sentence louder than needed, making you roll your eyes.

You stood up, walking towards the two by the door, a fake smile plastered on your face.

“And I’m sorry my dumbass of a brother couldn’t walk down a few stairs to open the door for his best friend.” You patted Harrison hard on the back, making him glare at you once again.

Tom just stood there, watching you both argue back and forth, eventually you two would stop, but it usually took a few minutes.

“Don’t you have something better to do rather than annoy me and Tom?” Harrison let out a dramatic sigh, raising his eyebrows at you.

You let out a fake laugh, patting him on the shoulder.

“Oh brother, you don’t want to know what I’m doing later.” You winked, making Harrison’s eyes widen, along with Tom’s, as you gave a small wave to the both of them, before heading up stairs to your room.

“-Wait! What does that mean? Y/N!” Harrison called after you, but he only heard you laughing in response.

“That girl, I swear to god.” Harrison muttered, rolling his eyes as he walked into the kitchen, Tom following after him.

“What’s with her lately anyways? She doesn’t normally act like this, at least not that I remembered.” Tom questioned, opening a beer and taking a sip of it.

Harrison shrugged his shoulders, taking a sip of his beer also.

“I don’t know man, but I’m tired of it, I’m constantly having to look after her and make sure she doesn’t do some stupid shit.” He groaned, making Tom laugh slightly.

“I know she probably doesn’t say it much to you, but I think she’s really glad to have a brother like you.” Tom smiled, giving Harrison a thumbs up.

“Thanks man, it’s hard sometimes, she’s my sister, and I love her to death, I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to her, even worse if someone dated her, lord.” Harrison muttered, taking another swig of his beer, before wandering outside to the pool, Tom alongside him.

You however, were texting your friends, they were planning on having a pool party later, which you were eager to go to.

The only problem was Harrison wouldn’t let you, especially with the swim suits you’ve been wearing lately.

You liked your body, you weren’t afraid to show it off either, but that’s exactly what made Harrison frustrated with you.

You packed your bag, stuffing in a swim suit, before heading down the stairs, your plan was to tell Harrison you were going out with your friends and that was it.

You wandered into the kitchen, looking for the two, before hearing music being played from outback.

You walked outside, seeing both Tom and Harrison in the pool, drinking their beers.

“Haz!” You shouted, but he didn’t hear you, making you roll your eyes in annoyance.

You walked over to the music, shutting it off, immediately catching their attention.

“What the hell Y/N.” Harrison shouted, making you smile innocently.

“I came out here to tell you I’m going out with some friends, I probably won’t be home until late.” You ran your fingers through your hair slightly, making Harrison look at you skeptically.

“Why so late?” He pressed, making you avoid eye contact for a split second, looking at Tom, who was also curious to hear your explanation.

“We, uh, are, um…” You trailed off, trying to make up some lame excuse, but Harrison was able to put it together before you could even manage to think of anything.

“Y/N, what’s in the bag?” Harrison questioned, getting out of the pool, motioning towards the bag you were trying to hide.

“Just stuff.” You shrugged, trying to play it off, but Harrison was too good at knowing your lies, and games.

“You aren’t leaving till I see what’s in that bag.” Harrison demanded, making you roll your eyes.

“It’s nothing! God! Why can’t I ever do something I want without you hassling me!” You shouted, shoving past him, making his jaw clench with frustration.

“Y/N, I swear to god if you leave this house..” He looked at Tom who was watching you cautiously, waiting to see what you would do next.

“What Harrison? What will you do?” You fired back, making both their mouths drop open, and you couldn’t help but feel a tiny bit of satisfaction.

“See you later boys.” You winked, before disappearing into the house and off to your friends pool party.

“I can’t believe she just did that, she’s so dead when she gets home.” Harrison ran his hands over his face frustrated.

“She’ll be okay Haz, she is your sister after all.” Tom made a point, making Harrison relax a tiny bit, just a tiny bit.

“Yes, I know she is, but that is also what worries me, she’s unpredictable.” Harrison looked at Tom, who nodded in response, that she was.

Hours passed and you were having the time of your life, the pool party was epic, everyone was doing whatever they wanted, drinking, dancing, swimming, anything you could think of.

You were drinking, a red solo cup in your hand, as you were dancing with your friends.

“Guys! We need to get a group picture!” Your one friend shouted, making you all squeal in response.

They gave a random guy their phone, “Okay ready? one, two, three, say partaaayyy!” The guy laughed as you all cheered after him, the flash going off, you all quickly rushed to see the outcome of the photo and it was perfect.

You all were laughing, your red cups in all of your hands, you all were just having fun, something you truly needed.

You all posted it on your social media, being a bit buzzed you didn’t really care at the time.

You then continued to party on, drinking and having the time of your life.

“Oh for fucks sake, what in the hell is this.” Harrison groaned out, seeing your newly posted picture on Instagram.

“Damn, where is she?” Tom questioned, looking at Harrison who was beyond pissed.

“Well, she’s supposed to be hanging with her friends, which in a way she is, but obviously she’s at a friends party, in a very revealing swim suit and clearly very drunk.” Harrison muttered, placing his hand over his mouth.

“I should have checked her bag, I mean look at that, who knows what guys are there.” Harrison set his phone down, going to grab another beer from the fridge.

Tom took this as his opportunity to actually see the situation, and sure enough there you were, red solo cup in your hand, laughing at something someone said, your bikini extremely revealing.

Tom blinked a few times, unable to believe you would actually do something like this, but at the same time he always knew you had a dark side, and he wasn’t going to lie, he liked it a tiny bit, just a tiny bit.

He sat there a few moments, trying to get those thoughts out of his head, why was he thinking like that? You were Harrison’s sister, and he was Harrison’s best friend, there was no way he could get involved with you.

Hours passed and you finally arrived home, drunk off your ass, you were giggling at literally anything.

“Where have you been Y/N? Shit you’re so trashed right now.” Harrison sighed, seeing your overly happy expression on your face.

“Hazzyyy!!” You squealed, making Harrison sigh once again and pick you up, there was no way you could make it up the stairs.

“That shit wasss crazzzyyy.” You giggled, as Harrison set you down on your bed, you immediately fell back staring at the ceiling.

“Y/N, what were you thinking? Someone could have taken advantage of you!” Harrison shouted, making you wave your hands.

“I never get to have fun, and it was time I did!” You protested, sitting up a bit too quickly as Harrison had to steady you.

“Tom can you grab Y/N a cup of water please?” Harrison yelled down the hallway, hearing Tom yell back in response and soon appear with a glass of water.

“Here Y/N, drink this.” Tom handed you the glass, you watched him walk over to you, your mind shutting off for a brief moment.

“Thanks.” You replied quietly, a small smirk on your face as you took the glass from Tom’s hands, purposely brushing your fingers against his.

You could see his breath hitch slightly, making you grin with satisfaction.

You glanced over at Harrison, then back at Tom who was doing his best to keep his thoughts out of his head.

“Hazzyy, can you get me some Advil?” You gave a small smile, seeing Harrison sigh in response.

“Watch her please?” Harrison looked at Tom who nodded slightly, before looking back at you.

You watched until Harrison slipped around the corner, making you smirk at Tom, who was doing his best to avoid your gaze.

“Something tells meeee that you’re hiding something Hollandddd.” You raised an eyebrow, standing up the best you could.

“Y/N, you’re drunk, you don’t know what you’re talking about.” Tom let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in.

“Someone that doesn’t know what they’re talking about sure does make someone nervous.” You fired back, making him lock eyes with you.

It was that split second you felt something you hadn’t ever felt before, there was a spark, and you were sure as hell Tom felt it too.

You saw his eyes widen slightly, he wanted to look away, but he couldn’t, something happened, and it wasn’t good, he knew he was in trouble.

You soon remembered you were still in your swim suit, a grin spreading across your face.

“Tom, since Harrison isn’t back yet.. can you grab my clothes for me to change into?” You sat down on your bed, you were still buzzed, there was no doubt about that, but at this point you just wanted to mess with him.

“Uhm, sure..” He stuttered, rushing over to find you something to wear, which was extremely needed at this moment.

He quickly pulled a random outfit together, handing you the clothing, before turning around.

“Hope you don’t mind, I’m just going to change here.” You spoke barely above a whisper, making Tom shut his eyes tightly.

Don’t picture you, don’t picture you, don’t picture you, Tom thought to himself, praying Harrison would return as quick as possible.

You put the clothes on, just in time for Harrison to return, seeing Tom’s flustered expression.

“Everything alright in here?” Harrison questioned, looking between you and Tom.

“Everything is great.” You smirked, taking the Advil Harrison brought you, before crawling into bed.

Tom had quickly rushed off, needing to get out of there as soon as possible.

What was happening to him? Or the better question was, what was happening to you?

Tom knew you had been acting a bit strange the past few months towards him, but he never thought anything of it until tonight.

That was one of the hardest nights for Tom to sleep, the constant questions flowing through his head, as Harrison was fast asleep.

The night went by quick, and you were the first to wake up, your head throbbing even with the Advil.

You wandered down the stairs, popping two more into your mouth, washing it down with water when footsteps were appearing in the kitchen.

“Well what do we have here?” Harrison raised an eyebrow at you, making you sigh and rub your forehead.

“I know I know, I lied.” You muttered, making Harrison nod in agreement.

“I know, Y/N, you’re so lucky mom and dad aren’t home this weekend.” Harrison scolded, making you groan.

“What even happened last night? I don’t remember much.” You admitted, looking between Harrison and Tom.

“Not much, you were just your annoying self times ten.” Harrison teased, making you joke laugh with him.

You looked at Tom who you could tell was deep in thought, peaking your interest as Harrison was cooking breakfast.

“You alright Holland?” You questioned, propping your chin on the palms of your hands as you glanced over at him.

“Y-Yeah uh, just thinking. Um, so you don’t remember.. anything from last night?” He questioned, making you do your best to remember, and then it hit you.

Your eyes widened slightly, signaling that Tom knew you remembered, both of your cheeks flushed red.

“I’m gathering you remember a bit..” Tom whispered, making you nod your head slowly, your eyes never leaving the counter.

Tom was focused on Harrison making pancakes, then took a side glance at you.

“We need to talk about it.” Tom whispered, sending chills down your spine, which didn’t go unnoticed to Tom.

He bit his lip slightly, making you cover your mouth, what was going on? Why did Tom have this much control over you suddenly? What did you tell him last night? Your mind was wandering everywhere to try and put bits and pieces together.

You remembered the spark you felt with Tom, but that was it, and you couldn’t understand why it was happening.

“Last I checked, I was unpredictable, I’ll choose when we’ll talk.” You whispered back, smirking slightly seeing Tom’s surprised expression.

“Alright guys! Who would like one of Harrison’s famous delicious pancakes?” He grinned, turning around with his chefs hat on, a plate of pancakes in his hand.

You took a small glance at Tom, seeing him take one at you, before you both gave a nod and smiled at Harrison.

“Eat up! There’s more where that came from.” He chirped, before continuing to cook the rest of the breakfast.

You sat there, taking a bite of your pancake, as Tom was sipping his coffee.

You glanced over at him, taking another bite of your pancake, giving him a look, causing Tom to choke on his coffee slightly, while giving you a glare in the process.

Harrison had no idea how right he was.

2

What the hell are you doing here? The whole city is looking for you. The Prince wants you put to death. He might force me to marry your Uncle. Hush! Just listen. I’m leaving Verona. We both know I’ll get no justice here. Where are you going? The Friar knows who’s behind all this. He’s left the city, I’m sure to the Abbey a day’s ride from here. I plan to follow him, but what I want - what I want is for you to come with me. Tonight. Now. Come with you? Now? Why on Earth… Because I need you, Capulet. I need you to come with me. I need you to do this. Please. Benvolio… You’re all I have. You know the truth, and you’re all I have. I know you don’t like me. And I know I haven’t done much to change that… besides saving your life and trying to get you out of marrying me. But one thing I’ve learned being stuck with you - what I’ve learned from spending time with you… is that you’re a good person. A good and decent and honest person, which in this city is a rare thing indeed. You say you want to end this war. Then let us end it… not with some fake marriage between Montague and Capulet, not with some lie… but with the truth.

Writing is Hard, Part 4: Dry Humping

Summary: Dean doesn’t understand the allure of dry humping.

Read Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Warning: Smut

Word Count: 3000ish

A/N: This is all written with love for fan fic. I’m teasing, not putting it down in any way. Hope you enjoy! XOXO


“Where does Sam think you are right now?”

Dean shrugs at you, hair dripping from the light rain that’s falling. “Can I come in?”

You head back for your chair, next to the table that holds your pizza, and leave the door open behind you. Dean follows, shrugging out of his jacket and shaking his head like a dog, though his hair is too short for it to do much good. “I told Sam I was coming to your room,” he says, a forced casual tone to his voice as he drops that bomb.

Keep reading

Animal - Jack Maynard Smut

Summary: “So grab me by the neck and don’t you ever let go, mess me up so good until I’m begging for more”

Word Count: 5317

Warnings: Sex, Oral Sex, Dirty Talk, Swearing

Requested: Yes!

Author’s note: This is the first time I’ve ever written smut, besides that tiny thing in the Conor imagine I posted last night, so please please please let me know how you like it. Also this is the longest imagine I’ve ever posted whoops.

Originally posted by mrs-jack-maynard

 

“You’re going to shatter that fucking thing if you’re not careful.”

You whipped your head around at the sound of your best friend’s voice, having not even realised that your grip on your glass had become worryingly tight. You gave him a sheepish smile as you looked up at Conor’s face, so different to that of his brother’s, and yet with the same piercing eyes that seemed to draw you in every god damn time. “Dunno what you’re on about,” you mumbled as you turned back to where you had been looking before, unsurprised at the lack of change in the scene in front of you.

“Just go and bloody talk to him,” Conor groaned as he wrapped his arm around your shoulders comfortingly. He had watched you and his little brother dance around your feelings for each other for the better part of two years now and he was getting right sick of it. All those secret glances when you thought nobody was looking and avoiding each other when the other had someone of the opposite sex around, it was beyond ridiculous. He had thought that after you and Jack had kissed at the Christmas party last month, that things would finally improve but they hadn’t, your relationship had merely shifted from ‘just friends’ to ‘just friends with benefits’ and as much as he was thankful that you were finally getting laid and working out some of that aggression, he could see how much it was hurting you, and he wasn’t okay with that.

“And cock block the master? I don’t think so,” you scoffed bitterly, your fingers tightening around the base of your glass again. You knew that the situation you had going at the moment wasn’t ideal, but it was Jack.  You had waited so long for him to see you as more than his brother’s best mate and now he did but it was non-exclusive. You knew that you should respect yourself enough to get out but you couldn’t, if this was all that you could have with him, then that was what you would have. It hurt though, being with him between the sheets and then seeing him with pretty girls in the streets.

“Alright that’s enough!” Conor’s voice almost shocked you into dropping your glass, you looked up at him with wide eyes as he pried the glass out from between your fingertips and placed in on the table behind you before offering you his hand. “Come on,” he urges you, wriggling his own fingers teasingly, “You and I are gonna go get a drink, and then we’re gonna go and dance, and you’re gonna forget all about my little brother and his tiny dick,” he smirked at you, making you laugh slightly before placing your hand in his and letting him tug you back towards the bar.

Truthfully, you had often wondered whether you were chasing the wrong Maynard. Conor had been your best friend for the better part of the past three years and you spent a lot of time together. He was handsome and charming and hilarious and sweet when he wanted to be, and you had drunkenly hooked up before so you knew he was a good kisser. Somehow though, you knew it just would be right. Because every single time the thought crossed your mind, you thought of Jack and you just couldn’t fathom being with anyone else.

Conor led you to the opposite side of the bar, far away from where Jack was currently chatting up some pretty blonde with double d’s who would plaster the news of their hook up across twitter/Instagram/snapchat/etc tomorrow. You could never take your eyes off of him, and especially not when he looked as unfairly gorgeous as he did tonight. It wasn’t until his eyes flickered to yours and that signature smirk spread across his face that you looked away, refocusing on your best friend and the alcohol in front of him.

You let out a loud groan when you noticed that Conor had ordered a round of tequila shots each for the both of you. Tequila had always been the one alcohol that would send you under the table, having been your university room mates poison of choice; any other alcohol and you could generally hold your own but Tequila was the one which would have you yelling drunkenly at Jack within the hour. “Conor, really?” you whined at your best friend, “You know Tequila is my weakness, I’ll be all over you in an hour,” you joked, having already accepted your fate as you picked up the shot.

Conor shrugged, “If that’s what happens, then it happens, no regrets,” he winked at you before picking up his own shot, the both of you throwing the shots back before slamming the glasses down on the bar. You grinned at him as you noticed his face twisting into a grimace at the taste of the tequila, knowing full well that he had only chosen the liquor in order to get you drunk. You could already feel yourself lightening up at the alcohol pumping through your veins. “Feel better now?” he asked you as he chugged back the vodka and soda in his hand, obviously keen to rid his mouth of the foul taste.

You let out a small giggle as  you nodded, wrapping your arms around his neck and leaning up to kiss his cheek lightly, “Thank you,” you whispered to him, before holding out your hands, “Come on then!” you said loudly, “Thought you promised me a dance, Maynard?” you grinned at him, your smile growing as he slipped his hands into yours, tugging you into him for a tight hug before pulling you in the direction of the dance floor.

You refused to look behind you to where you could feel Jack’s eyes burning into your backside; if he wanted to use you and then throw you away then fine, he wasn’t the only one who could draw attention on the dance floor, and you were going to make sure of it, besides, was it just you, or was Conor looking particularly good tonight?

-

Across the bar, Jack could barely believe his eyes. You never drank tequila when you went out, you always skipped out on it when the boys organised shots, so why on earth would you down four shots with Conor? And why the hell were you letting him drag you onto the dance floor right now? The only person who you ever dance with when you went out was him, he was the only one who you let put their hands on you.

Had you looked that good when they had gotten there? Had that dress always hugged your frame that fantastically? He gulped down the remainder of his joke and tried focusing on the girl in front of him, she had caught his eye when he’d come up here before, with her large chest and long curvy legs, but the longer he looked at her, the more he noticed the flaws in her appearance. Her eyes were dull and surrounded by too much eyeliner, they didn’t sparkle like yours did, he couldn’t see the emotions flash through them like he did in yours when you would lay in bed with him and tell him stories about from before you’d met him and the boys. Her lips were flat and looked sticky with lip gloss, they weren’t plump and red like yours always seemed to be, even more so after he had been kissing you.

He tried to pay attention to her, tried to focus on the way her lips moved, tried to imagine the way they would wrap around his cock like yours had this morning when he’d had you in the shower, but he merely cringed at the thought of her touching him like that. His eyes flitted over to where he could see you and Conor on the dance floor and his eyes nearly bugged out of his head, rage pumping through his blood stream and making him nearly blind with unadulterated fury.

You had your back to Conor’s chest as you guys danced to the overly loud EDM song which was pumping out of the speakers, your head was thrown back against his shoulder as you giggled at something that he was saying into your ear. Jack had no clue what his brother was saying, but he was pretty sure that whatever it was, wasn’t innocent. He clenched his fists together at his side as he watched Conor’s hands slide down to your hips, knowing god damn well that you didn’t wear proper underwear under that particular dress because of visible panty lines.

He snapped when he saw Conor’s head drop down and press to the crook of your neck, right where Jack knew that special spot was, the one that would drive you absolutely wild when Jack latched onto it. He was ditching the girl and surging across the bar towards the dance floor before he could second guess himself; all he knew was that he needed to get between the two of you before you ended up in Conor’s bed by the end of the night, because you were his.

It was a reasonably small and cosy club that the gang had found themselves in tonight, as opposed to some of the bigger ones that they frequented, so it didn’t take long until Jack was in front of you, and wanting to knock that dumb smirk right off of his older brothers face. You didn’t notice that Jack was there until he was right in front of your face, but as soon as he was, you barely registered that Conor was even there. A smile lit up your entire face that had Jack’s stomach doing backflips, you were so happy all of the time, how on earth could he even consider someone else?

“Jack!” You squealed as you wrapped your arms around his neck tightly, having to stand on your tip toes to wrap them around him properly. You could feel the warmth of him seeping in through your clothes as you buried your face into his neck like you always did. “Conor was just telling me the funniest story!” you giggled as you pulled back, whipping your head around to confirm the story, only to find that Conor was nowhere to be seen, “Hey where’d he go?” you pouted as you turned back to face Jack, only to find he had a peculiar look in his eye that you couldn’t quite decifer.

You also realised for the first time how close you were to him, “What happened to that girl?” You asked him curiously as he pulled you into his body, his arms wrapped tightly around your lower waist, “Looked like you two were really hitting it off,” you commented as your arms wrapped around his neck loosely, one hand tangling in his blonde strands as the other lingered around the hem of his shirt, the very shirt you had torn off of him this time last week.

Jack chuckled slightly as he bent his head down to be closer to you, “Why? Is someone jealous?” he asked, his mouth hot against your ear as his warm breath washed over your neck, making you subconsciously press yourself closer to him. You bit back a moan as he tugged on your ear lobe with his teeth gently before pressing a kiss to the spot behind your ear. He pulled back to gauge your reaction and wasn’t surprised when he noticed you rolling your eyes, despite the deep and dark blush on your face.

He brushed his lips against your jaw bone softly, barely even a whisper of a kiss against your skin, “You know you’re the only girl for me,” he murmured against your skin, dragging his mouth across your jaw and down your neck slowly, occasionally using his teeth to nip at the spots he knew were sure to set you off. He smirked against your skin when he felt your breath hitch, latching his mouth onto the special spot and giving in a particularly hard suck.

You chuckled breathlessly, using the hand that was in his hair to pull him away from you, “Last time I checked, this,” you gestured between the two of you, “was non-exclusive, that’s what you wanted, right?” you asked innocently. You were riling him up and you knew it, for some reason, he was being all weird and possessive and you were gonna revel in it for as long as you possibly could. You let out a squeak when he used his arms around your waist to haul you into him, your hips pressed together tightly as he growled into your ear.

“Don’t pretend that this is just sex, you know it and I know it, so don’t give me that shit,” he hissed against you before sinking his teeth into that special spot and making you throw your head back, your nails digging into the exposed skin of his shoulder as you pressed the whole length of your body against him, feeling his hardness press into your stomach firmly as he rutted against you.

Letting out a frustrated huff, you used your hands to tug his head up harshly, both of you breathing heavily as you looked at each other, his cheeks already red with the arousal that was pressed against your stomach, as well as the dampness that you could feel pooling in between your legs. “So are you just gonna talk shit or are you gonna actually do something about it?” you challenged him with a raised eyebrow. You knew exactly how to bait him, the same way he knew how to drive you insane.

He let out a low growl as he yanked you into him, his hands caged around your face as he kissed you harshly. You moaned into his mouth softly as you gripped his shirt in your hands, nipping at his bottom lip playfully as he kissed you with a bruising intensity. You let out a soft gasp as one of his hands slid from the back of your neck, down to your ass, squeezing you roughly. You felt him smirk against your mouth as your mouth fell open slightly, slipping his tongue in between your lips and deepening the kiss.

There was no denying it, the boy knew how to use his mouth, he was a phenomenal kisser, and was even better at using his mouth on other areas of your body. Right now you weren’t concerned about his mouth though, you were more interested with the rather hard appendage that he was currently grinding into your hip. The boy was hung as hell, and there was no getting around it. Memories of this morning came flashing through you like a flood, the memory of waking up with his head between your thighs making you whimper into his mouth, that boy knew all of you secret spots and was not shy about any of it.

Smirking, he pulled back from you, biting his lip at the sight of you looking up at him with pupils blown wide and lips swollen and bright red, the memory of you looking up at him from between his legs this morning making him swallow back a groan. He pressed his mouth against your ear again, “C’mon, let me take you home, you know I’ll make it worth your while,” he groaned into your ear, sending a sharp surge of pleasure shooting down your spine. Pulling back to see your reaction, he let out a relieved breath of hot air as you nodded quickly, his hand latching onto yours and tugging you behind him as you both made your way out of the sweltering hot club.

The tight grip that he had on your hand did not escape your notice as he pulled you out of the club and into a cab outside, letting out a deep breath as he slumped against the seat on one side. “What in the hell has gotten into you?” you demanded, crossing your arms over your chest as you turned your body to look at him, furrowing your eyebrows together tightly as you moved your eyes over his physique. You didn’t want to stay on one part too long, otherwise you’d become distracted by the different parts of his body that reminded you how beautiful he was.

You let out a squeak as he wrapped hand around your waist, hauling you over to his side of the cab abruptly and burying his face in the crook of your neck, “Didn’t like it,” he mumbled into your neck, humming contently as your hand reached up to run through his hair softly, your nails scratching against his scalp softly as he nuzzles his nose against the juncture of your neck and shoulder. “Didn’t like seeing Conor with his hands all over you,” he mumbled again, lifting his head up to look into your eyes that were wide in shock as you listened to him intently, your heart bashing against his chest. “You’re mine,” he whispered, his mouth pressing against your jaw again as you nodded blindly.

“Yours,” you mumbled hoarsely as his mouth moved down your neck again.

 

→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→

 

 

You didn’t remember how you made it from the cab to Jack’s apartment, partly because it happened so fast that you could barely blink, and partly because you had spent most of it with your mouth glued to Jack’s neck. As soon as you crossed the threshold into the apartment, both of your clothes were flying off, leaving a trail behind you both of your heels, Jack’s shirt and belt, with his shoes ending up somewhere near the kitchen. Before you knew it, you were flat on your back on Jack’s extremely plush bed, with Jack kneeling at the bottom of the bed and smirking at you.

Rolling your eyes, you propped yourself up on your elbows on the bed, balancing your weight on them as you cocked your head to the side slightly, “I’m not gonna magically transform into a perfect ten, y’know,” you chuckled softly, “This is as good as it’s gonna get, Maynard” you smirked. He simply shook his head at you before pushing your legs apart, your tight dress moving up and over your hips as he settled his body between your thighs, much like he had this morning.

He kissed a line across the top of your panties as his hands hooked behind your knees and dragged them over his shoulders, opening you up to him. You collapsed onto your back as he placed open mouthed kisses to you through the thin lace of your panties, your hands weaved into his hair as his mouth continued on it’s way down, placing kisses down your upper thighs before switching sides and kissing up the other thigh, just avoiding the place where you needed him the most.

Using his teeth, he dragged down your panties slowly, his nose brushing against you softly and causing you to let out the most pornographic sound you had ever heard in your life. He smirked up at you from between your thighs, discarding your panties behind him as he spread his hands out over your hips, holding you open to him as he physically licked his lips, oh this boy was going to be the absolute death of you.

Starting at your knee, he began placing feather light kisses to your inner thigh, slowly making his way up to the apex of your thighs where you laid bare and ready for him. “Such a good girl for me,” he murmured against your skin, “Always so ready for me,” he mumbled as he dug his fingertips into your hips, hard enough so that you were sure that you’d have matching bruises in the morning.

“Jaaaaack,” you whined, bucking your hips up in an attempt to create some friction, “Hurry U-ohhh,” a moan ripped out of your mouth as he suddenly licked a strip from top to bottom, the tip of his tongue flicking against your clit as he slid one finger inside of you.

You felt the pleasure began to build as he latched his mouth onto your bundle of nerves, sucking and flicking his tongue against your clit as he set a steady rhythm of pumping his finger in and out of you.

You slapped a hand over your mouth as you moaned even louder, your nails digging into his scalp and causing him the hum against you, the vibrations going through you like shock waves. You whined and bucked your hips against his face, desperate to go over that edge, causing him to wrap his arm around your waist to hold you in place as he added another finger into the mix.

Curving his fingers up to brush against that specific spot inside of you, you tugged on his hair harshly, making his smirk against you as he picked up the pace, pumping his fingers into you faster and making sure to press firmly against that spot every single time.

Finally, you could feel the coil of pleasure in your stomach begin to tighten almost painfully, your thighs shaking around his head as you threw your head back, “Oh oh my god, Jack! I-I’m g-gonna, oh! I’m almost there!” You moaned out loudly, trying to buck your hips up. Jack curved his fingers again, focusing on just rubbing against that spot until you were coming like a tidal wave. Your back arched up off of the bed as you fell apart beneath him, riding out the last waves of your orgasm until you were shaking, pushing him back as you tried to catch your breath.

Once you managed to regain your breath, you pushed yourself up again, intent on returning the favour, only to find Jack having already discarded his tight jeans and crawling up towards you. You never got used to seeing him like this, he was big but not too big and perfectly thick, in other words, the boy was hung as hell and you drooled slightly every time you saw him naked.

He crawled up over you, pushing your dress up your body and peeling it over your head as he went, his mouth pressing a line of hot, open mouthed kisses as he went. You didn’t object when he pulled your dress over your head, nor when he unclasped your lace bra and latched his mouth onto your nipple, dragging his teeth over it gently as his hand tended to the other one.

Your hand reached down between you, wrapping around his girth and beginning to pump him up and down. Jack let out a grunt as he grabbed onto your wrist burying his face in your neck as he pulled you off of him; that was different, Jack never said no to a hand job or blowjob. He chuckled against your skin as he brought your hand up beside your head, lacing it with one of his as he brought his head up to look at you. “I’m not gonna last if you put your hands on me,” he chuckled softly, brushing his nose against yours with unfamiliar gentleness as he leaned down to kiss you, dragging the tip of his cock up to rub against your clit, and sending a jolt of pleasure through you.

Biting your lip, you lifted one of your legs to wrap around his hips, you pulled him forward until he was right against you. Smirking, he wrapped his hand around your thigh, hooking the other one around his hips as he entered you in one smooth thrust. Throwing your head back at the feeling of him fully inside of you, you let out a loud moan, arching your back and wriggling your hips in a silent plea for him to move. He seemed to catch on as he braced his hands next to your head in a push up position as he set a quick rhythm straight up.

You dug your nails into his back as you arched into him, dragging them down his taut skin as he attached his mouth to your sweet spot, working on leaving a sizable mark on your neck as he hiked your leg up even higher on his waist, scraping his teeth against your neck as he gave a particularly hard thrust, his fingers digging into your thigh harshly.

“Ugh you’re so fucking tight,” Jack groaned into your ear, his breath hot against your neck as he snapped his hips against you even harder than he had been before. He let out a strangled grunt when you tightened around him, your walls squeezing him tightly as he picked up the pace, his hand wriggling between you two as his thumb pressed against your clit again.

You let out a high pitched moan as he slammed into you, knowing from the way he was quivering inside you, that he was nearing the peak. “Come on, baby, I’m almost there, go over the edge with me,” he grunted in your ear, the wet sound of skin slapping together filling the room, both of you covered in a thin layer of sweat as you bit your lip.

Using a brief lapse in his attention, you flipped him onto his back, arching your spine as the new angle allowed him to slip in just that little bit deeper, pressing harder onto that specific spot inside of you. Bracing yourself with your hands on his chest, you began bouncing up and down, moaning at the new feelings surging through you.

You moved faster, feeling the ball of fire in your stomach coil up even tighter as you picked up the pace, all you needed was that little push, and you’d go off of the edge with him. You let out a loud high pitched scream as his thumb pressed against your clit for the third time, white spots exploding behind your eyes as your second orgasm of the night hit you like a freight train. It wasn’t long until Jack was following after you, his hips snapping like pistons into your own until he was letting out a guttural grunt and holding your hips to his as he exploded inside of you.

You collapsed forward onto his chest, covered in sweat and coated in the combined juices of you two as he slowly slipped out of you, softening against your thigh as he wrapped his arms around your tired and clammy body. You rested your face in the crook of his neck, breathing in and out softly as you attempting to recollect yourself. You traced patterns onto his chest with the tip of your nail as you felt his chest still heaving up and down underneath your hand.

You had heard once that, if you have absolutely mind blowing sex (like you’d had just then) then the best thing for you to do, was not talk to the guy afterwards, so as to let him get his bearings back. With that in mind, you crawled out of his arms and made your way into the bathroom to clean up.

As you looked at yourself in the mirror, your mind went back to earlier tonight, had he been jealous of you and Conor? If so, why? It had been his idea to keep the arrangement as no strings attached, friends with benefits only. Why was he suddenly being so boyfriend?

That thought remained on your mind as you tugged his thrasher shirt over your head, your favourite of all his shirts, and padded back into his room, expecting to see him zonked out on the bed. You were not expecting to see a fully coherent Jack Maynard sitting up in bed and twirling your panties around in his hands.

Blushing, you hurried over and pulled them out of his grasp, pulling them back up your legs quickly before taking a seat next to him on the bed. He smiled at you dopily, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear gently, “You look beautiful in my shirts,” he mumbled softly, his smile widening when you blushed deeply but leaned into his hand nonetheless.

Biting your lip, you looked up at him again, “Why didn’t you take that girl home with you tonight?” you blurted out before you could stop yourself, your curiosity getting the better of you.

“Why does it matter, Y/N?” he asked as he looking down at his lap, remembering when you had been on it fifteen minutes ago. He hadn’t expected you to ask him that, not after you guys had just had the best sex you’d ever had before.

“Because you were totally into her, and then you ditched just to make sure I wasn’t going to hook up with Conor!” You exclaimed, throwing your hands in the air in exasperation. Jack was a master at avoiding direct questions and had been for as long as you’d known him, it was one of the things that made him so alluring to girls your age.

“Because he’s my brother!” He fired back, his expression twisting into a scowl at your persistence, “You have a club full of guys to choose from and you pick my brother?!” he sneered, crossing his arms across his chest in a huff.

“All I would have done is kiss him, and that shouldn’t even matter to you! You’re the one who chose this arrangement, not me!” you screeched, running a hand through your hair in agitation, “So tell me why you went home with me and not her? Because I’m easy? Because you don’t have to worry about me being a pain the next morning?” you badgered him, knowing that you were getting too worked up but being too far gone to stop it. Your words were spewing out of your mouth at an alarming rate and you couldn’t stop them.

“She wasn’t you, okay?!”

To say you were shocked at his words would have been a vast understatement.

 

He took a deep breath before looking at you again, “She wasn’t you, and the more I looked at her, I compared her to you and realised that I was being a fucking twat to you,” he sighed, running a hand through his blonde hair and making you bite your lip as his biceps tensed slightly. “You deserve the world, Y/N, you deserve a guy like Conor or Oli who can give it to you,” he muttered, avoiding your glance.

You let out a small laugh, unable to believe what was happening, Jack actually wanted you for more than sex.

After unsuccessfully trying to capture his gaze, you crawled into his lap, sitting back on his thighs as you hooked your hands around his jaw, dragging his head up to look at you and almost melting at the vulnerable look in his eyes. “Jack,” you said softly, your thumb rubbing against his jawbone gently, “You’re the only one I’ve ever wanted, I wouldn’t have agreed to any of this if it were any different,” you giggled. “So if you want to be with me, then I’m right here, but if you don’t, then I’m probably just gonna keep wanting you,” You told him in a soft voice, sure that your own vulnerability was shining through at that moment.

He let out a soft laugh before yanking you forwards and wrapping his arms around you tightly, “How could anyone possibly not want to be with you?” he grinned as he pressed kisses all over your face. You giggled loudly as he rolled you onto your side, tucking the blanket around you as he pressed a small kiss to your forehead.

You couldn’t help the smile that spread over your face at the action, so this is what it felt like when the person you wanted, wanted you back.

anonymous asked:

I still can't believe that happened....

Honestly, I really meant it when I said this:

I have no idea what in the shitting hell is going on. 

ESPECIALLY yesterday. WHY did all these professionals ascending onto Louis’ property look like a play put on by aliens about how to Human™? 

Like, “Here I am, I’m the doctor man! With my doctor tool!” 

“I am in my lawyer suit with my lawyer papers because I’m a very important lawyering man.”

“I"m the coffee man doing my coffee job, standing out of the way, for that pap on the lawn!”

“I’M THE MOTHERFUCKIN DOGGG TELLIN Y'ALL TO GET YA NASTY ASSES AWAY FROM MY BOIIIIII”

I don’t really have any answers except that all of this is

It is so over the top and extra…I just really don’t even know what to say. It is a fact that the paparazzi are called for 90% of the shots you will ever see. The airport pap was called, presumably I feel, to capture them in their Tweedle Dumb and Dumber jumpsuits, which is fine because it’s clear that they are both under some sort of arrangement with Vetements. The return of what’s her face isn’t that surprising given that she was pictured with Gigi for official Tommy Hilfiger promo months ago and Zayn and Louis are still both, as far as I know, under Syco, so it would make sense that they roped their beards in together, and that they would use them for mutual promotion with TH. Maximum exposure required Zayn and Louis’ participation clearly. Louis recently followed Tommy Hilfiger on Twitter so it’s just like breadcrumb trail of stuntness that is right in front of everyone.  

There is so much overwhelming evidence to support that this was all planned. I don’t know about the hoodrats jumping them at LAX being real or fake, but I imagine that the “scuffle with the paps” was intentional, thus giving way to Dan fuckin W’s article about Louis’ mental stability and then the comment from the Desperado of Calabasas about him “not being himself”…this seems like a terribly drawn out and horrible season finale that everyone’s just tuning into out of fuckin obligation to the years they’ve invested in the show. 

It’s just…sad. It’s really sad for people who have bothered to look beyond the headlines, which are fabricated by yellow journalists and shitty PR people to build a narrative that is not true, and who know that this is the last thing that someone like Louis Tomlinson deserves. He deserves exactly none of this shit.

Not to continuously bring it up, and I wish I didn’t have to, but what I wrote about this subject over a year ago now is more relevant than ever. And that’s extremely depressing. If you haven’t read these, then hopefully you will and they can shed some insight into what I believe is actually happening behind the scenes. 

Is Louis Tomlinson A Victim of A Character Assassination Campaign?

Why Is It So Hard For People To Believe That Louis Tomlinson Has Actually Had A Baby?

Is Louis Tomlinson’s Bizarre Behaviour Actually Just Him Mocking Simon Cowell?