puppy swarm

imagine burr coming home one day to a full litter of puppies. The squad was fostering a pregnant dog, but after the pups were a few weeks old it was clear their house was too cluttered and impossible to puppy-proof. 

They all expect to have to grovel for this one, having asked for forgiveness rather than permission, and knowing how clean and tidy Burr likes things. When Burr gets home, he walks straight to his living room, knowing his company from the vehicles in the driveway. He’s not expecting the swarm of puppies immediately jumping at his knees and tugging at the hem of his pants. 

Burr does not react right away, his expression carefully neutral. The room is silent. Lafayette tries to escape out the back, but Laurens blocks the way- they’re all part of this. Alex is staring at Burr with challenge in his eyes, but biting his cheeks for once to avoid speaking first. Hercules looks unruffled, but there is a telling sheen of sweat on his brows. 

The moment freezes, and the air feels as heavy as ice. The puppies are the opposite of silent, high pitched yelping and barking. No one pays them attention, as if hearing television static.

Then Burr sits down, gracefully, slowly, like it is the most natural thing to do in that moment. His knees unbent, legs splaying comfortably out. The puppies take immediate, enthusiastic advantage. 

“I can die happy, now”, Burr breaks the silence with a solemn and almost dreamy voice. He spreads his arms out and gently scoops three puppies at once. They oblige easily, tumbling over his chest and licking every bit of face they can reach. Slowly, Burr lays himself down completely, and all of the dogs are suddenly on his face, his chest, his legs. 

“This is the best thing that has ever happened to me,” Burr says with the conviction of a man who has thought long and hard, and considered every possible answer. He closes his eyes, content. The others consider that they never had asked if Burr was a dog person

Okay, random scenario bc it’s late

•Shura is still a “student” to keep and eye on Rin
•sees Mephisto in dog form wandering (going to check in on Amaimon probably) and calls out smth along the lines of “Look! It’s the school mascot!” or “Hey!! A cute puppy!”
•Swarm of students wanting to see the normally elusive canine
•a semi dirty glare is sent her way
•anyhow they’re all petting him and whatnot when Shura asks what the “mutt’s” name is
•since they can’t find a name tag and no clear one has ever been given to the mascot they decide to give it one
•"wait is it a boy or girl?“
–>"it has a pink handkerchief, wouldn’t that make it a girl?”
–>“well you know how /weird/ the headmaster is, it might be a boy. you should check~”
•the dog is too horrified to react after hearing the sentence before one of the students looks
–> “ah you were right! it is a boy”
•Now they’re tossing names around
•Shura makes eye contact with Mephisto before saying, with some authority to make sure it sticks, “let’s call him /Sammy/”
–> a chorus of agreements
•if glares could set things on fire
•some of the cram school students are watching the kerfuffle in morbid horror
•Izumo in particular is trying to hold in a laughing fit
–>Paku wasn’t at the cram school long enough to see/figure out who the white terrier was
–>Paku: “are you alright? what’s so funny about the dog?”
•Izumo just slowly turns and says “That dog is Sir Pheles”. A pause.
•Paku is a surprisingly loud laugher

THINGS THE SIGNS ARE PROBABLY DOING (GIF VERSION

Aries: Doing the nasty-nasty stuff.

Taurus: Getting high off weed to the point of insanity.

Gemini: Posing as another identity.

Cancer: Crying over some dumb shit.

Leo: Being glamorous AF.

Virgo: Hibernating.

Libra: Finding out that half of the letters in the word ‘mirror’ are R’s.

Scorpio: Being a heartbreaker.

Sagittarius: Clubbing all night.

Capricorn: Not taking their meds and doing whatever tf they want.

Aquarius:  Checking themselves out.

Pisces: Going to the pet store to be swarmed by puppies.

Imagine your icon taking you to a ‘no stress’ room, and you know nothing about it as you walk in. Then, they open a gate and puppies flood out, swarming you.

youtube

puppy swarm

Not everyone loves them.

Someone needs to invent a way we can program our dreams. I don’t want to have to do anything complicated, I just want to select from a drop down menu and have to decide between “laying down and being swarmed by puppies” and “getting to bath a sloth”.

For one of my image fills: 

Dialgoue taken directly from Captain America, Vol 4, #27


It was easy to just accept it as a tactical plan when Tony made it sound so simple: “I’m going to shut down my main and auxillary power, then set of an electromagnetic pulse from another battery pack. That ought to do the trick.” Until he added, “But it means shutting down my heart.”

Steve’s first response was the hell you are! But the hundreds of biting, flying, puppy-sized robotic insects swarming all over them weren’t going to go down just because they asked nicely. “Tony, are you sure?” Steve asked, because he wasn’t sure. He used the gap to try for another plan – any other plan – but he was coming up empty.

“I’m not suicidal!” Tony snapped, already opening a panel on his arm and pushing buttons, and Steve would really prefer it if he would stop pushing buttons. “I need you to count ten once they drop, then you need to press hard on my suit’s heart chakra until you hear a loud click – or me scream. Got it?”

Steve tore one of the clinging bugs away from his thigh, opening a rip in the suit and a gash in his leg. “I hear you,” he answered, because there was nothing else to say. They couldn’t let this get any further out of hand than it already had.

Tony stopped fighting. “Don’t screw up!” he said, but his voice was soft and a little ragged under the screech of the giant bugbots. “On my mark.”

Later, Steve would have to explain to Tony that when he was doing something “on my mark,” it meant actually indicating mark at some point. Iron Man fell with a heavy crash. Steve knew it was coming, but he still spun automatically at the sound. Bugs were swarming him, and another wave was coming right for Steve. He moved back to stand over his fallen comrade and counted nervously in his head – how long? Would Tony even be able to activate the EMP if his heart had stopped? He sliced the shield through the air to make room for himself and turned. The bugs were still up, but Steve wasn’t going to let Tony die while he waited for an EMP that wasn’t going to come.

The shockwave knocked him off his feet. All around them, bugbots dropped out of the sky in twenty-pound rain drops. Steve curled under his shield to ride out the tide, counting slowly – one-one thousand, two-one thousand, three one-thousand…-

He fought his way out from under the pile of unmoving robots at six one-thousand and spun in horror. The area was covered in bugs, and he couldn’t see Tony anywhere. He tried to reconstruct how far he’d fallen, but he was turned around and not sure if Tony was behind him or in front of him.

Nine one-thousand…

Where?!

Ten one-thousand.

A flash of red caught his attention and he dove into a pile of the bugs for Iron Man’s hand. Tony was limp as Steve yanked him out of the pile with one great heave and dropped him on his back. He fell to his knees over Tony’s hips, curled his right hand over his left and shoved on the circle in Iron Man’s chest that should have been glowing but wasn’t.

Four pulses.

Five.

Six.

Seven. He got to his feet so he had more leverage, applying his body weight to the reactor.

“Come on, damnitall, Tony!” Eight.

Nine.

“Don’t do this to me!” Ten.

He would have preferred ‘a loud click,’ but under the circumstances, he would take Tony screaming. The arc reactor powered up under his hands, light exploding out from between his fingers and nearly leaving him blind. He dropped unsteadily to his knees, his stomach twisting and tugging, but the reactor was glowing, and he could just barely hear Tony making tiny gasping noises inside the suit. Steve wanted to rip his faceplate off to see for himself that Tony was still breathing, but he contented himself with resting a hand on Iron Man’s knee and waiting for Tony to sit up.

“Ow,” Tony said eloquently as he struggled upright a few long minutes later. “We get them all?”

Steve meant to say, Yes, you brave, idiot. And: you almost got me, too. Stop stopping your heart, please. Instead, he held out a hand and said, “I just hope nobody on the perimeter has a pacemaker.” He meant for it to be a joke, but it felt hollow.

Tony took his hand, but his voice was bitter and sharp as he responded, “It was a low-yield pulse. I’m always mindful of my liability, Steve.”

Steve’s tongue felt like it was wrapped in cotton and his jaw had been wired shut. He couldn’t respond, didn’t know how to reassure Tony that Steve knew that – knew he was careful and always aware of the impact he had on others, and Steve admired him more than he knew for it. He’d never thought of himself as a coward, but there was a lot he found himself unable to say to Tony Stark.