puns-that-kill

I just had a job interview and the guy was looking over my resume and he was like “oh sign language?” and I was like “yeah my dad’s side of the family is deaf so I grew up with it” and he said “oh cool my son is hard of hearing so we are learning sign language” and I was like “yeP ITS PRETTY HANDY” AND I DIDN’T REALIZE THE DAMAGE I HAD DONE UNTIL IT WAS ALREADY TOO LATE NOW I’LL NEVER HAVE A JOB

the signs as dad jokes

aries: i’ll call you later. > don’t call me later, call me dad!

taurus: “did you hear about the kidnapping at school?? it’s okay, he woke up.”

gemini: what time is it? > “time for you to get a watch.”

cancer: dad, i’m cold. > “go stand in the corner, it’s 90 degrees.”

leo: “i stayed up all night wondering why the sun went down, then it dawned on me.”

virgo: “what do you call jay-z when he’s sleeping? jay-zzzzzzz.”

libra: “wouldn’t you say that whiteboards are quite… remarkable??”

scorpio: “why doesn’t dracula have any friends? because he’s a pain in the neck.”

sagittarius: tell me a dad joke > “you.”

capricorn: ”what do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsssssh.”

aquarius: dad, i’m hungry. > “hi hungry, i’m dad.”

pisces: “singing in the shower is fun until you get shampoo in your mouth – then it’s a soap opera.”

7

Broken

Cause brothers are like bisycles…? 

I always imagined those treats as big and wide, and you can just snap them into two portions and then put them together again ( I dunno how, magic, but that would be so much fun to play with!)

Yes i know they look like nice cream, shut up they’re not ok

And lazy analogy is lazy

I’ll take this opportunity and announce a bit of a break - I have things I need to do and i won’t be able to post anything till Monday, or Tuesday :(

6

Where in Dipper realizes that going dark-side isn’t exactly what he’d thought it’d be like.