pulling his favourite face

anonymous asked:

hello i just wanted to yell abt this to someone but i feel jake's ig mostly has pics with amy in it. like it's not a conscious thing ?? but one day he's looking through it and he's like omg this is p much all amy with a bunch of !!!!!!!!! dork as captions il

hi!! Come and yell to me whenever I love this!! ️<3 I got so carried away w this and was making notes about it on my phone for ages

SO: okay yes ABSOLUTELY this is the truth and even if he knows he’s doing it he 100% tries to be slick about it/act like it’s nothing at first??? I’m gonna throw in some headcanons that nobody asked for to explain myself bc I’m sad and love this idea so much:

  • Jake’s had an Instagram account since 2011, largely because Gina forced him to open one and be her first follower (which obvs turned out to b the first of thousands)
  • 95% of his posts, to start, are just him doing Stupid-Fun-Jake-Shit! e.g. Splash Mountain / meeting Regis Philbin / eating a mountain of sausages w his dad / him and the squad in a booth at Shaw’s, pulling faces
  • Amy obviously begins appearing on his account LONG BEFORE they actually begin a romantic relationship; and it’s all teasing/mocking e.g.        - A picture of their two desks with the caption “guess who’s the most fun?”  
    - A picture of Amy working hard at her desk, fixated on her computer- looking completely beautiful, though that’s NOT why he took it, duh- with Gina in the background pulling a face at her                                                 - His crowning glory, and favourite Instagram post of all time, AKA the final post of their non-romantic relationship, taken only a couple of weeks before they kiss for the first time; a dim picture he took of Amy giggling like a lunatic in the passenger seat of his car on a stakeout, her face scrunched up as she clings onto her stomach with laughter. He posts it without a caption, unable to justify it- until Charles makes a comment at work about how “the best things in life need no explanation” and he promptly updates the caption to something under the lines of “memorialise this evidence of Santiago finding me funny" 

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straywolfie  asked:

My phone doesn't have emojis but could you please do a Klance "finding the other wearing their clothes" one please?

mmm yes. I will grant you this.

Lance stumbles to his tent with weary legs and aching joints. He’s looking forward to curling up in his sleeping bag and passing out after his day of intense training. I had been Coran’s ridiculous idea to do an “old fashioned paladin training camp” on a favourite planet of his, complete with hiking, climbing, campfires and frigid nights. Lance watches his warm breath billow in front of his face and his cold fingers tremble as he reaches for the zipper on his tent. With a sigh, he stumbles inside.

He stops in his tracks to prevent himself from collapsing on top of the other boy that sits in his tent. Keith guiltily looks up. His arms are wrapped around his narrow waist, his flushed cheeks are pressed against a grey hood, and Lance’s unmistakable green jacket is tightly wrapped around his frame. 

“Um…” Lance looks at him curiously.

“I’m sorry!” Keith implores. “I was just…”

“It’s ok.” lance chuckles and sits next to his friend. “Are you cold?”

Keith pouts and nods. 

“I grew up in the desert. I don’t really have any good cold weather jackets.”

“Ah, so your red jacket is a fashion statement then.” Lance rolls his eyes. Keith elbows him in the side. 

“It’s fine for desert nights, or cold space hangars…. but out here…” He exhales. “I was really struggling.”

Lance hums. He turns to run his hands under the collar of his favourite jacket, pulling it closer to Keith’s face to keep in more heat.

“Is my jacket warmer?” He smiles.

“Uh…” Keith’s eyes nervously flit to the side. “Yeah… it’s really nice.”

Damn. Damn that was cute. 

You can keep it!” Lance blurts out. Keith looks startled. “I mean… as long as we’re on this cold planet, you can use it.” Lang shoots him a finger gun. 

“Can’t have our star pilot dying of hypothermia.”

Keith beams. He pushes his hands out of the too long sleeves and lowers his hood. 


“Yeah…” Lance smirks.

“But this is your favourite.”

“I’ll get it back from you eventually.” Lance shrugs. “And in the meantime I can use this sweater.” Lance pulls at the blue knit he currently wears. “It keeps me warm enough”. 

Lance’s long fingers move to Keith’s sleeves. He gently begins to roll them up so the cuffs sit comfortably at Keith’s wrists, instead of comically hanging over. 

“There we go. I don’t want you dragging my sleeves through your food or anything.”

“Thanks.” Keith laughs. His eyes look up to meet Lance’s, before quickly looking back down at their intertwined hands. Lance coughs. 

“Uh… you know though…” There’s a slight tremble in his voice. He pulls his hands away and runs them through his short hair. 

“I…It is really cold here… and if you were worried about maybe getting cold at night…” He fumbles and stammers over almost every word. “These tents would keep in… like if there were more people in here…!”

“Lance…” Keith gently places his hand over Lance’s. His shaking stops. As does his breathing. 

“Could I sleep in here with you?” Keith takes the first step. He can tell what Lance is dancing around, what Lance has been dancing around for months now. Keith had been patiently waiting for a knock at his door at night… a quiet conversation on the star gazing deck… or maybe even being hastily pulled into a broom closet… but none of these have happened. Keith decides he is tired of waiting.

“W…Well yeah! of course! I… I mean if you think that would help?!” Lance blushes up to his ears. Keith chuckles in the back of his throat. He stands and makes his way to the tent’s entrance. 

“I’ll go get my sleeping bag” He turns to undo the zipper. Fingers grab at his other hand. 

“W…wait…” Lance stops him. He looks over his shoulder to see the usually cocky and over confident boy cautiously moving towards him. Lance grabs the lapels of his jacket and straightens them. 

“This uh… this really suits you. You look good.” He smiles. Keith melts and pulls Lance’s jacket tighter around him. He buries his nose in the collar. It smells like sea salt and jasmine. 

“Careful, I just might steal it.”

“I might let you.”

Gatito: Chapter 5

Having a cat-human hybrid for a partner was never going to be dull, or easy, even without Omnics and Overwatch getting in the way. A collection on one-shots featuring Kitty!Jack and R76.

Inspired by @infinite-atmosphere and @noodl

Disclaimer: As always Overwatch and its amazing characters don’t belong to me, I’m just borrowing them.

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Daddy Issues 5 (S.W)









Sammy went back to LA before the date of my next appointment, he has events he has to attend and concerts and performances lined up. He seemed rather upset that he couldn’t make it, especially since I was going to find out the gender, but I didn’t know whether he was being serious or not. He was never a good actor.

He came with me to announce the news to my parents.

They were not happy, not one bit. Both of them blew up on me, and him, and then they got into their own argument about how they failed parenting all three of their kids and used me, my brother and my sister as examples of kids that no parent would want.

Just like I assumed, they kicked me straight out and gave me an hour to pack my things. Amy rushed over with her mom and so did Emily and Annie, Sam’s sisters, to make sure I get everything. My parents threatened to sell everything I left behind.

So, I’m now living with Amy and her mom in their spare room, which we converted into half bedroom, half nursery. And today, they’re both coming with me to find out whether my baby is a boy or a girl.

Oh, Lori, Sam’s mom, is coming with us, too.

“I hope it’s a girl.” Amy says as she settles herself into the chair next to my bed.

“I want a boy.” I say, pulling my shirt over my stomach and revealing my huge bump. “All the girls I know are bitchy and my daughter would probably catch onto their behaviour.”

“Boys argue more than girls, you know.” Lori comments with a smile. “Annie and Em barely ever fought when they were younger, I was constantly pulling Sam and Ben away from each other’s throats.”

Sam and Ben are still like that sometimes. They like to piss each other off from time to time to see how far they can push each other. It’s a pretty stupid game, someone always ends up with cuts and a black eye.

“Yeah, but I’d rather have a boy so I don’t have to deal with periods and bitchy mood swings.”

I feel sorry for everyone I grew up with during my first year of puberty, I was an angry beast. I physically attacked my brother and sister and Amy, and I broke a few doors in my house. I would kill my daughter if she grew up to be like me.

“That’s true, you were an aggressive ass 12 year old, Y/N, you attacked me once.” Amy shrieks, quietly to be respectful, but with wide eyes and a crazy tone.

“Exactly! I’d rather not go through the torture my parents went through with me.”

I’m pretty sure Amy still has a scar on her arm from that day.

“What if it is a girl?” Lori asks.

I shrug and look over at all of the different equipment on the tray next to me. “I’ll be happy either way, I’ll just have to send her to Military school if she’s a little brat.”

“Sam would spoil her rotten.” Amy’s mom comments with a laugh, which Lori agrees with.

“If you have a boy, he’ll force him to play at least one sport, you know that, right?” I nod enthusiastically and rest my hands on my bump.

“Oh, I know that, I’ll be doing the exact same thing! I wanna be a sports mom.”

“You’d be the mom that attacks the other moms for badmouthing your kid.” Amy comments with a sly laugh.

I nod in agreement and point at her, “And you’d be the aunt that would pull me off and then continue attacking them for me.” We make a great tag team.

It goes silent between us for a few moments and I can’t help but wonder where the damn technician is, it’s been more than 10 minutes now.

“There are cuter clothes for girls, you know.” Amy just won’t give up. “Boys clothes aren’t very cute.”

“You know that having a baby isn’t like Mario Kart, right? I can’t just pick Peach or Mario because I like one better.”

Wow, that sounded a lot better in my head.

Amy stares over at me with a dead face and shakes her head. “That was the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard you say.”

“I thought it was relatable.”

“Oh, it kind of was, but you’re a freak.” I playfully roll my eyes and wait for the technician to come back.

Lori looks between the two of us with an amused smirk and leans back against her chair. “What would you name the baby if it is a boy, Y/N?”

“I don’t know, actually.” I haven’t thought about it at all, I’ve had other things, like my living situation, to sort out. “I kind of like Axel.”

Amy’s eyebrows raise, “From The Middle?”

“You know it.” I nod. The Middle is my guilty pleasure. I’ve watched every episode and I absolutely love it.

“And if it’s a girl?” Amy’s mom, Jodi, asks.

“Marnie, definitely.”

I love the name Marnie, it’s such a pretty name and I’ve never met anyone with the same name. Ever since I watched Halloweentown, it’s been my first choice for my first daughter.

“That’s a really pretty name.” Jodi compliments. “I don’t know anyone named Marnie.”

“So, my grandchild is going to be Axel or Marnie?” Lori grins. I nod my head and tap my fingers on my stomach.

And finally, the technician walks in with an apologetic smile for taking so long.


“Y/N! Babe! How are you?!” My old friend Nate Maloley yells through FaceTime as he picks up Sammy’s call. “I haven’t seen you in forever!”

“Jesus, Nate, how pissed are you right now?”

“Very.” He laughs and pulls Sam’s phone closer to his face. “How is my favourite gal?”

“She’s good, pregnant, but good, how’s my favourite boy?”

“Ohhhh, Sam’s gunna be pissed when he finds that out!” I raise my eyebrow and Nate just laughs even more. “He’ll be pissed that he isn’t your favourite boy.”

“He got me pregnant so clearly, he isn’t worthy of being my favourite.”

“Well, I’m fucking honoured.”

“Where is Sam? I have news but I guess you guys are busy.”

“I uh, I don’t actually know, probably drinking in the kitchen or some shit.”

“It’s like 7pm there.”

Skate just shrugs and smiles. “It’s never too early to turn up baby!” I hear a chorus of hollers and whoops in the background and soon, Swift is shoving his face into the camera.

“Aye! It’s Y/N!” He shouts wildly. “You look gorgeous, as always.”

“Don’t let Sam hear you say that.” Nate warns, which I hope is a joke.

“Whatever,” John shrugs. “How are you, beautiful?”

“I’m good, how are you?”

“I’m absolutely pissing drunk, and it is fucking fantastic.” He grins and adjusts his snapback so it’s not completely covering his eyes. “Too bad you can’t get drunk with us anymore.”

“Y/N, you are a wiiiiild,” Nate drags, “Wild drunk. You were so much fun.”

“Are you saying I’m not fun now?”

“Honestly, you probably aren’t because you’re pregnant and you can’t do shit without worrying about the baby.”

“We could always have some other kind of fun?” Swazz winks and causes Nate to scoff and push his face away from the phone. “I’m kidding! I wouldn’t do that to ol’ Sammy boy!”

Guy code.

I laugh shortly and lean back on the couch. “I’ll let you guys get back to having fun, tell Sam I called, yeah?”

Nate shakes his head and the phone is backing away from his face. “No need, he’s here-”

The blonde haired Samuel pops up on the screen with a huge smile on his face. “Hey, Y/N, wassup?”

“Are you busy?”

“Kinda, but I can talk. I’ll just go upstairs.”

“Are you sure? I don’t wanna intrude.” AKA, I don’t want to be that bitch of an ex who gets in the way of his new, single sex life.

“I always have time to talk to you, Y/N.” He smiles a cheesy smile at me and pulls his phone close to his face. “So, what’s up? What happened at the appointment today?”

“Everything’s fine, he’s healthy and he’s a big baby.”

His eyebrows raise in surprise. “He?”

“It’s a boy.”

His eyes light up in seconds and the smile on his face grows and stretches as far as he can possibly make it.

“No fucking way! Y/N! This is incredible! I’m gunna be a dad to a little boy!”

I can’t help but be a little bit giddy about how well he’s taking this news, he’s definitely brightened up about the whole idea of being a parent so young. He’s so happy about having a little boy, he’s going to be a carbon copy of his daddy, I can feel it.

“I’m gunna be soccer mom AF.” I grin excitedly.

Sam puffs out happily, running a hand through his messy, floppy hair. “What are we naming him? I need to tell everyone. Holy fuck, I’m so excited!”

“We aren’t telling your fans yet, Sam, no way in hell.” I am not ready for that drama. “And his name is probably going to be Axel.”

“Axel?” Sam scoffs. “I am not naming my son Axel.”

“What the hell is wrong with Axel?!”

He shakes his head and looks at me with a scowl. “I’m not naming my son Axel, Y/N, end of.”

I just shrug. “Okay, then his name will be Harrison.” Sam just stares at me, kind of in disgust, and rolls his eyes.

“Harrison Wilkinson?”

“Who said it’s going to be Wilkinson?” I ask with a straight face.

The child usually has the mothers surname if the mother is not married or involved with the father. Yes, Nate is involved with the baby now, but what happens if he stays for a few months and then doesn’t bother to see him regularly? What if he only comes around when he feels like it?

He raises his eyebrows, “Why wouldn’t it be Wilkinson?”

“Maybe I want it to be Y/L/N-Wilkinson, or just Y/L/N.” I really don’t want to make that mistake, especially because me and Sam aren’t together.

“Are you being serious?” He asks, a look of disappointment wifting into his eyes. “You won’t give him my last name? I’m his father, we both know that, I get just as many rights over his name as you do.”

“It depends on how I feel when he’s officially named, Sam, let’s just leave that alone for now.”

“Okay, fine.” He sighs lightly and looks at me through the camera. “I’m coming back when you’re in the last month so I’m definitely there when, he, comes.”

I raise my eyebrows in a midst of shock. “You don’t have to be here for the whole last month, Sam.” He doesn’t even have to be here at all, he has commitments out in LA and I don’t want to be the reason he’s not there.

“I want to be! I want to be there for my son and for you!” He insists loudly, raising his voice to a firm shout. “I want to be able to help you do everything before he’s here, and I’m going to stay in Omaha after he’s born for as long as I possibly can.”

“So, you want to help my emotional, stressed out, hungry, swollen self for a month?” Sam nods and smiles. “And then you want to drive over everyday and help with your child who’ll do nothing but cry, eat, sleep and poop all day for weeks?” I ask, slightly amused.

I mean, I guess he would help out a lot, especially when the baby’s sleeping and I need to sleep and shower. Plus, Sam should be bonding as much as he can with his son if he’s barely going to be in Omaha. It’s not like he can move back here, and I can’t move out to California.


If that’s what he wants, I’m not going to stand in his way. “Okay then, it’s completely your decision, I don’t mind what you do as long as you don’t piss me off.” I warn.

He pushes a smile and digs his fingers into his hair again. “I’ll try my hardest not to, I promise.”

“You’ve made that promise many, many times before yet you still managed to always piss me off.”

“I’ve changed since then!” He laughs a little bit, but his smile drops and a serious look takes over his face. “I’m gunna be a dad, Y/N, I have to grow up a little and be responsible and make decisions that aren’t just going to effect me.”

I didn’t know how much he had actually thought about it. He’s getting really serious about stepping up to the role of being a father and personally, I think it’ll be really good for him. Yes, it’s going to effect his entire life and his career, but it’s going to help him get more serious

“Your whole life is going to change.”

“I know, I’m ready for it.”

“Are you sure?”

“One hundred percent.”

I can’t help but smile. “That’s really great Sam, I’m proud of you.”

“Thank you, babe.” Babe? Really? “Maybe you should start calling me daddy, Y/N, so when the baby’s here, he knows what to call me.”

I can’t help but burst into a fit of over dramatic laughs, with a couple of little snorts, at this suggestion. He cannot be serious!

“I am not calling you daddy, Sam!” I laugh with a shake of my head.

“I’ll call you mommy!” He laughs wildly, throwing his head back and snorting a little. “C'mon, ma! It’ll be really kinky.” He winks at me and bites down on his lip.

I take that all back, he’s still the same old, immature Samuel that I dated back in the day, making everything anyone says sound sexual. It was too good to be true.

“I’m already having one kid with you, I’m definitely not having a second!”

“Maybe we can just have the sex then?” Sam wiggles his eyebrows and winks at me a second time, but I just shake my head.

I put on my best bitch stare, and shoot him down - just like the old times. “Samuel, we are never having sex together again - ever.”


He places a hand over his heart, “Baby, don’t hurt me like that.”

This conversation has gone so many different ways already and it’s only been going on for 7 minutes.

“What’s with all the pet names tonight?”

A pink blush creeps onto his cheeks and he looks down, away from his phone, as he speaks. “I wanna make you feel special, because you’re special to me in so many ways and you always loved it when I called you babe, or baby, so I thought I’d bring it back.”

If it was anyone else, I would be okay with it, but it’s Sam… I just, I can’t be dealing with this all over again, especially when I’m pregnant with his kid. “We’re not together though, you can’t call me those names anymore.”

“I’ll call you whatever I want to call you, Y/N, because in my head, you will always be mine.” He says quietly but just loud enough for me to hear him.

I don’t know if the alcohol or weed, or both, have just started to take effect on him or if he’s being soberly serious about this. Why would he put himself through that?

“Sam, no-”

“Yes, Y/N!” He argues and snaps his head back up. “In my phone, your name is still ‘My Y/N’ with all of those emoji hearts you put in!” That was before we were even dating…

He really didn’t change my contact? I changed his the second after we broke up. I guess girls have different ways of coping with a break up. Even though it’s usually the guys who move on straight after the break up…

I shake my head, he cannot be doing this. “Stop, Sam, seriously, I’m done with this conversation.” I hover my finger over the end button.

“I’m sorry,” Sam frowns. “I’ll let you go and sleep or whatever, I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

“Be safe.” I comment before I hang up.

“You too, keep my boy good.”

Headcanons - Bedtime

Roy never gets ready for bed at the same time as Riza; he prefers to watch her routine. She brushes her teeth, then pulls back her hair to wash her face. That’s his favourite part, especially if she turns to say something to him when she’s got foamy cleanser all over her cheeks and nose and forehead. It’s cute and hilarious at the same time.

anonymous asked:

Luke 30! pretty please:)

(“It’s not what it looks like…”)

“Babe?” Luke’s voice echoed through the house, the familiar sound of his coverse trudging up the stairs making your heart race in your throat, pounding in your ears in anxiety at the though of him walking in and catching you both.

“Babe, you home?” He was edging closer to the bedroom, the volume of his call increasing with the thumping rhythm of your heart. He was absolutely going to kill you. He was probably going to yell, he might even cry – and that you couldn’t bare to see. Shoving all evidence under the bed, you smoothed out the blue flannel of Luke’s you had on and held a finger to your lips, indicating your hiding guest remain silent.

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He is...

(Bucky-centric but) Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

Summary: He’s a liar, is what he is. 
Words: 2,192
Warnings: language (what’s new lmao)
Notes: i wrote a paragraph in school and then this ended up being the full product 😯

Originally posted by ebonyfangirl

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namjoone  asked:

I'm just like so emotionally distraught. Please give me cute adorable dennor headcanons to cheer me up. Just a couple. I really need it right now.


Norway is a blusher. Despite his coolly apathetic facade, he is often betrayed by his face flushing embarrassingly red. Denmark likes to come up behind him, wrapping his arms around his waist and whispering sweet nothings into his ear, smiling into Norway’s hair as his face heats up, and he relaxes against Denmark with red cheeks and a racing pulse.


Denmark suffers from vivid night-terrors, usually of the other nordics leaving him, saying they hate him. He wakes in the middle of the night up crying quietly and trembling, and Norway, innately sensing there’s something wrong, will wake up with him. He’ll switch on the bedside lamp and gather Denmark into his arms, letting him bury his face in his stomach. 

Norway will pull out Denmark’s favourite Hans Christian Andersen fairytales and start reading them out, pulling funny voices and everything. He props the book open with one hand, while the other strokes Denmark’s forehead, combing back soft locks of blonde hair and resting his knuckles against the other’s hot cheek.


Denmark will occasionally go on baking sprees, and Norway will return home to the kitchen trashed, flour everywhere, and Denmark smiling in frilly oven mittens and a ‘kiss the cook’ apron. Norway will try to scold him at first, but it almost always culminates in them tossing handfuls of flour at each-other and falling to the ground in a heap of giggles and tickles and giddy kisses, wrapped up in each-other and smiling like children.