sxnguinis  asked:

“Shhh, it’s alright. It’s okay.”

“Yeah, of course it is, my throat is unbelievably dry and it hurts to speak, it’s completely fine,” Lia replied with deep sarcasm as she blew her runny nose and tossed it into the bag beside the bed that was already filled with used tissues. It was rare for her to get sick, and she was lucky enough that it didn’t usually last a long time. However there were odd occasions when they did but Lia couldn’t be certain if this was one of those times. 

At least she wasn’t puking her guts out, vomiting was Lia’s least favorite kind of sickness. She could handle the rest usually with some bit of ease (by that, it meant that she did what she normally would, even if others would advise her to lie in bed). Her eyes were still adjusting to the light from the recently pulled-back curtains, filling the whole room with light. 

Was it early morning? Or mid-afternoon? She wasn’t certain, but she sat up slowly and looked back at her boyfriend, wondering if she would be able to risk getting out of bed without him trying to put her back in it.

something lowkey terrible happened again and i cant even complain about it to anyone because its pathetic and im pathetic
i shouldnt even complain to begin with but in this moment i have heavy and raw anger about everything up to and including my choice of company and the circumstances of their lives that i both eat and puke
however i know i am just especially mad about his because i am especially mad
it has been a long ass time since i was angry and it feels sickening because its a back and forth

That moment when you find something so horrific that you feel like puking yet so funny that you can’t breathe and you’re not sure whether or not you love it or hate it but you just curl up into fetal position and rock back and forth

“Moving on.”

“This will be a roughly sentimental piece so if you don’t feel like puking up your breakfast, lunch, dinner, or linner you may wish to throw this away now. Life has taken a few odd twists and turns as of late. I find my fortune waxing and waning with the coming days and it has been an odd ride. The subject of today’s letter is something that we all must face when problems become too much.

Moving on.

Moving on. The thing you tell your friends to do but can never quite do yourself. Such an easy thing to say too! “Oh, you broke up with her? Time to move on.” Because it is always so easy. I mean, the booze sometimes makes it easier doesn’t it? Boozing is a magical, headache inducing ride that takes you as far away from the problem as humanly possible without really addressing what you need to move on. I spent my afternoon boozing and golly gosh it didn’t quite do the trick.

But when I woke up from my hang over, my lover having held my head over the toilet to keep me from puking on her nice carpet (she is my rock), I find myself realizing that I’ve developed the tools I need to do this difficult thing which is to “move the fuck on.” I guess moving on requires a lot of tools.

You gotta cry. A lot. I mean it isn’t quite manly to cry I know but fuck being manly I’m upset. You got to get all that anger and sadness out of your system. In a healthy way. Boozing is not healthy I don’t care what the magic carpet told you. It requires acceptance. Acceptance is a lot like giving up which I know a lot of people absolutely hate but I like the word. It is admitting this has got to happen. And so it happens!  You’ve accepted it.

But acceptance does not mean forgetting. You shed a lot while you do this. But you keep two important things in mind when you start moving on. You carry with you those good memories of that time and you keep in mind the reason you leave. Never forget those good memories. Those are important as fuck I shit you not you hold on to those things and you squeeze until it tells you to go the fuck to bed you’re chafing. Then there is the reasons you leave. You hold onto those in a special lock and key and you look back at those when you start to think about making the same mistakes you made before.

After you’ve thrashed, flailed, filed your memories and accepted what is going on that is when you clean up those tears and you start moving forward. Because hey, that is what you do, isn’t it? You move forward. You look for the future. You look for new things to fill your life while holding on to the important things that stick with you. Family, friends who won’t turn their back on you, allies who came running when you need them, favors you need to pull from time to time, and most important of all….

…. remember to bring a towel.

To those who left and to those who stayed. To the friends I made and to the friends I lost. I love you all.

Doctor Kaisin Ozerov.”

I honestly haven’t been this sick in years. It came out of no where, too. I just woke up yesterday feeling nauseous and had full body aches, and today I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve had to run to the bathroom to puke. I don’t understand where this came from, and I really need it to go away. I even went as far as calling out for my shift tomorrow. And my coworker is picking up my boyfriend from work and taking him to the store to get me medicine 😭 thankful for helpful people in my life