publishing this because the whole world needs to know how messed up this fandom is

The new Shizaya Author's Generation

The New Shizaya Authors’ Generation

Good Day to Everybody who is reading this.

You are on 2014-2015 searching for enjoyable Shizaya stories?

But we aren’t speaking about the good old masterpieces like:
Catnip, Dying Message and Filled to the Brim by RukawaGF, Beautiful Mess and all the wrong reasons by Mistresskiko, Chronic and Love blind eyes by thirteen-forty-two. And you aren’t even asking for the almost clandestine old serious material like Corpse Road by Soul Under, Gospel of Deception by thereisafire, Broken by leviathanofthesky, Under the surface by caelice and even the good fluff and angsty Frigility by Twilight Zephyr.

Sure and nobody can’t speak the contrary, the already listed fanfictions were incredible, each held a different and unique kind of magic, and I know there are more like Xaleria07’s work “A little thing called Love”, let’s name DRRRLover1224’s work who brought us a lot of laughs and coos for her work “Hush little bartender”, but then I won’t be able to finish today, these ones were the most popular and personally most enjoyed. The old material is seriously good.

Stories like Catnip by RukawaGF aren’t even finished but sure are unique pieces of art we can’t ignore. I’m not saying the “old” material is boring more less a negative aspect, out of the contrary my fellows, out of the contrary… But this list is also to show the world the newest authors that I’m sure have a massive potential to reach the review’s first pages.

We are aware the Shizaya fandom is getting AGAIN popular, why? Because the second season… rather; the whole three mini seasons were already sketched for 2015, and the people’s attention is already picked by it, we are all happy about Durarara!! X2. The fandom is getting here and there, the fan art is increasing, we are getting excited, the blogs don’t stop talking about it and as always the Fan Fiction media is overflowing.

There are a lot of people who never left the fandom and kept on waiting for the authors in fan fiction to update, the good stories hadn’t stop since then but the reason you are here is because you are interested in knowing the new fruits of fan fiction to the world.

I am going to list at least 5 new fan fictions that I consider them good and interesting. Though some are relatively new, I will warn and list them anyways, some fanfictions I am surprised they lack of reviews even if the flow and the writing style is just amazing and outstanding.

With this I also ask you to review these authors, their stories are simply exhilarating, don’t just go and use the filters for the most reviewed, I’m sure the first ones are good stories but give this authors and their stories a try, I’m sure you will love their ideas:

-IIIII-

I start here and I am really shocked this story doesn’t have the reviews it deserves, this is the oldest of the list and I think one of the best angsty fanfic in the fandom, considering the dark atmosphere and the hazy hope you slowly build within every word you read, the story is simply amazing and I will list it over here since it is not even good reviewed, it was published in 2011.

“Without” by Nocturnalux: Izaya commits suicide by jumping off a skyscraper in front of Shizuo. Shizuo is unable to cope with it and sets out to discover the reasons that led Izaya to it. Very dark fic

LINK: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6960466/1/Without

-IIII-

So this the listing starts, be aware I will randomly order it, not from good to least good, no nothing, I’m just ordering without specific reason for the order.

  1. 1.       Breaking Point – Abreaction – Mend by Novoux.

No guys this name is not that long; actually is a trilogy of One-Shots, which means there are three chapters in total a very short fic but believe me when I say it worth every single review it could get, unfortunately the author don’t get them, why guys are you so lazy? This author’s style is simply beautiful. Here the links and the summaries.

  • Breaking Point: A careful relationship painfully awkward in its first stages becoming more of a dragging routine the further apart they were. L-word turning back to angry hatred that stirred up more fights in the past month they’ve ever had in a month before they were together. Shizaya.

LINK: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10674001/1/Breaking-Point

  • Abreaction: He couldn’t forget. This had all been planned out so carefully, his plan to erase his memories to the point where they’d be smudges on paper and not jabbing him every minute of the hour. Izaya wasn’t sure how long he can pretend it doesn’t hurt when Shizuo’s already given in. It shouldn’t be this way and this relationship wasn’t meant to exist. Sequel to Breaking Point. Shizaya.

LINK: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10695059/1/Abreaction

  • Mend: “You don’t have to give up. Trust me, is all I’m asking. I’m not making you something you’re not.” They both needed this more than they cared to admit. Final to Mend series, sequel to Abreaction. Shizaya.

LINK: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10739171/1/Mend

This fanfictions are by Novoux and this Author has other good works, delicate pieces of work, with nice descriptions and beautiful atmosphere such as “Touch” but this one is Lemon/smut, so I warn you guys, I’ll post the link For touch:

Touch by Novoux: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10788353/1/Touch

And to be honest I could list her all fics but I find these listed ones very beautiful, so let’s move to the second!

  1. 2.       I want to stay with you, forever. By Shorihime’s – Shizaya stories : That- had been a gunshot. Time seemed to freeze as three simple thoughts slowly formed in Shizuo’s mind. -Someone died in that alley. -Izaya was in that alley. -Izaya fought with knives. “No way…”, he mumbled. “…they couldn't…” “…they-” Without a second thought he dashed off. -Don’t you dare die on me… Izaya! (Chap. 3) Shizaya, fluffy, angst & later lemons.

Basically the story is a whole fucked up mystery, which is fantastic, though things are very clear, the tension from the start is really amazing, I can’t spoil you much because I want you to click the link and pay this author a visit, You want action and romance? Then check this out because “BOOM” will blow your nerves! We hope the author clear us some mysteries soon right? I’m just enjoying this story so much I hope she knew how much this affects me ;)

LINK: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10356578/1/I-want-to-stay-with-you-forever

  1. 3.       Freudian Slip by S.Miyuki: A slip of tongue wasn’t a big deal. Normally. But when you were Heiwajima Shizuo and you happened to yell it to Orihara Izaya in front of half Ikebukuro… well it was a completely different matter. Shizaya.

HAHAHAH Guys, this is one of the best Shizaya stories I have ever read, Oh lord! PLEASE do yourself a favor and check this out, you want to laugh and feel butterflies all over your belly then give this pretty work a try! It’s one of the best One-Shots ever written <3 This was funny, cute and very VERY inside character!

Oh guys <3 it has a sequel

Sequel: The Suspension Bridge Effect: Trolling the whole town into believing that you were in a relationship with your archenemy wasn’t really a big deal. Normally. But when you were Orihara Izaya and your archenemy just happened to be Heiwajima Shizuo… Well it was a completely different matter… especially since said archenemy was making a point of crossing all reasonable boundaries. Shizaya, Freudian Slip’s Sequel!

LINK: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10679386/1/Freudian-Slip

  1. 4.       Rabbit Hole by VenemousSyring: They are all sick of Izaya; they made a little secret group with Shizuo to try to break the informant and after concluding that no physical harm will bring Izaya down, they all turn to count on Shizuo to make Izaya fall for him. They will record every move and breath; every secret and every vulnerable fiber of the informant in order to expose Izaya on the screens of Japan. SHIZAYA

No words to describe the heart smash when you read this story, the concepts and the chapters are so well written it makes your skin crawl, apart from judging a fic for grammar, this FF uses so many descriptions and spirit swells, it makes you think it is perfectly written, with every single chapter your fortitude breaks even more. I’m impressed by the psychological character’s analysis and In-Character even if the protagonists are stuck in such a peculiar situation. You want the hate; love, hope and anger collide within your heart? Let’s pray for hope guys! GIVE this amazing story a chance!!! Totally romance Shizaya.

LINK: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10770833/1/Rabbit-Hole

  1. 5.       Icebreaker by Infinite Vertigo: When Izaya checks himself into the mental hospital, Shizuo finds himself unable to not visit-not because he cared, of course, but because he was curious-bringing with him taunts, annoyance, and a bag of ice. Shizaya

LINK: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8504541/1/Icebreaker

  1. 6.       Chancing on Apathy by Infinite Vertigo: And for Heiwajima Shizuo, graduating high school has come down to two things: fail his senior year or kiss Orihara Izaya. The choice may just kill him. Shizaya

LINK: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9262265/1/Chancing-on-Apathy

Okay guys! You noticed I listed TWO fics from this author but is that BOTH are so beautiful and hey, I selected this two not because it was of the same author but because they are so beautiful I just couldn’t just ignore the urges to post them both.

One is totally angst, it’s number 5 and it is really amazing, it makes you feel so sorry and it’s very IN-CHARACTER, the second one is a totally different atmosphere, it is mostly sweet and fluffy and very good written.

So that’s it for now guys, I hope you liked this fanfictions and get fun by reading this new authors!

Loves-

Havoc’sMaster

let the only sound be the overflow (NightAngel Mermaid !AU)

Length: 1/? (1,052 words)

Summary: In 1906, Warren Worthington lll is desperate to got out from underneath his father and his business, and aspires to become a marine biologist with enough published works to keep him  rich and far away from his Father. Whilst on an observance trip near a river in Southwest Germany, he’s confronted with his answer (and his possible downfall) in the form of a fish-boy that calls itself Kurt. 

 Warren becomes a mess. 

Rating: T (for future chapters)

Notes: Alright! My first series in this fandom, i’m sorry it took me so long. But I’ve been wanting to do this for a minute - I’ve never done Mermaid AU before so please bear with me. Also, this is an epistolary, meaning it’s written like a series of letters and diary entires from Warren. Just a warning this is only the first one, please acknowledge it’s pure exposition!

 (p.s. for the next week or so I’ll be going on hiatus, but requests are forever open and i’ll try to fill them once its over))


Keep reading

Thoughts on Fandom Shake-up, Thank You Rob & Kristen

This was my very first post since I dipped my little toe into the world of social media (twitter, tumblr and Instagram) exactly a month ago. “Why is Rob doing it?” I just edited and reworded some parts and reblogged this since I find that it is still very important to get the message across and address the infighting, hatred and constant bickering in this crazy fandom of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart. I once tweeted that haters and trolls do not need to bring us down, we can self-destruct fine by ourselves. I want to start with me, being respectful and apologetic to these two people who are central to this mess and confusion, who owe us nothing and did nothing to us other than giving us inspiration, hope, happiness and love through their works and lives.

Why did Rob embark on this obviously made up showmance for the world to see? Well, I think to throw the fandom into a frenzy of conflicting and mixed information. Each pocket and segment of this fandom is given something. To the robssessed, they can continue to fuel their fantasy and objectify Rob as a sex object, not to mention a ‘serve her right’ to the Kristen who supposedly cheated on their precious Rob. To the Krisbians, it is good riddance to Rob for hoarding their Queen and continues their illusion that one day Kristen will ‘come-out’ for them.

The hardest hit is the Robsten (a big portion of those we are all).Yes, theirs is an epic romance on-screen and off. They have already given us their chemistry documented in films and carried on with a 5-movies saga bringing in billions to Summit and the industry. Has ANY couple in Hollywood ever done that? All this comes with a big price, and the two people who are paying for these most are Kristen and Robert (and not to mention their circle of friends and relatives). The loss of privacy is a very high price to pay, not to mention freedom of movement, God forbid that happens to their child too. That will be the most hounded child ever (outside Prince George). I would not want that for any child to be under that microscope. We already know how their parents’ are hounded and hunted.

Stephenie Meyer once said ‘Oh it is so not my business’, when asked about Rob and Kristen at the height on 2012 scandal. And she also mentioned some time later she almost felt sorry for doing this to them. Yes, the creator of the Twilight saga is almost apologetic for bringing the massive successes to her stars. These are people who know first-hand or have observed how suffocating the lives of Kristen and Robert are, and not to mention the threats and danger too. Indeed, the robsten fandom is so fascinated and inspired by their love story, till this day it is still bringing in huge money. The twilight fanfic empire gave birth to best-selling books in history (FSOG) and the most anticipated movie. I am sure many writers, publishers, movie makers are all jumping on this cash wagon BUT on a positive note many new talented writers and movie makers are going to be discovered along the way.

Rob wants no part of it. And he is also not scorning his twilight past. He is an actor by profession. It is thanks to having the stars aligned right that he landed the part of Edward and fell in love with Kristen. But that is the end of their story for our entertainment people. He has shown us he fought for his relationship (during the Rupertgate scandal) but he will not want to be pinned to their forever happy ever image like Edward and Bella for our benefits and enjoyment. A relationship and not to mention a marriage is between two people. Besides the two people no one else knows what is going on between the two unless you live them or you are their diaries.

Kristen once said that the pursuit of information of their private lives will never cease, and she will not give you anything. She has given us her best performance in her movies, that is all we are entitled. We should be thankful for their those wonderful memories and beautiful moments they have shared (on screen or at work), we have crossed the line when we invaded their homes, reposted paparazzi pictures, harassed their families and friends’ online and stalked every outlet of media for their private information (including house address, where they eat/shop/hangout). We are the ones (the whole fandom of Robert and Kristen admirers) who brought on the demand for gossip material, thus the higher price of their photos to the paparazzi. Some gifs made by fans I saw earlier showed that Rob laughingly commented that there is no difference between paparazzi and stalking fans. This is exactly what it is.

Rob is trying to break the Edward mould that we all wanted him to be. He is fiercely protective of his family. If holding hands with a female artiste who needs publicity, who so happen to be a friend to his small circle of brotherhood/friends, I could see so many wins for Robert by his action.

He could break the robsten dream for good that they are not Edward and Bella, his private life is not for sale, and he could regain his dignity from all the names people call him for standing by Kristen during Rupertgate (I once saw a poll about how ridiculous men think of Robert by ‘taking back’ Kristen ) . By selling a PR story about an uprising artiste by using your name and diverting the media focus, he could finally remove the cheater stigma on Kristen and let people focus on her work and not her past, i.e he has supposedly ‘moved on’. Hey one big plus he could finally walk down the streets freely as Robert Pattinson, the ACTOR (not the vampire actor, not Edward Cullen). What is not to like when this brings in financial benefits and recognition to the so-called artiste too?…. We tend to overlook the point he made once in a recent interview that he was trailed by paps for 9 hours in a car, and he also said they needed police help to get out of a karaoke bar in no-where America once, just because a tweet came out indicating his location. So this is a win on all sides; diverting the heat and threats from his family, showcasing someone and walk, shop and eat like a normal person down the street.

Google on Robert Pattinson today, you get nothing but news of this showmance. Then do another search on Kristen Stewart, you get only work related reviews, movie reviews, critiques and feedbacks. Of course Rob’s name is still tied to Kristen in the tabloids when they have to play the ex-gf card and how scandalous the romance was….. but we are forgetting that the Rupertgate is NO LONGER mentioned! At least not as often as the last two year, on every single news piece, feature print articles which Kristen has done since BD2. Thank God for that! Every article gossip or not (in print and online) loves to cut and paste or add a blurb on that past, and then suddenly we can finally focus on her work, her acting and what she cares for. She is riding the wave of her career now and nothing can stop that wave. She is garnering honest opinions, critiques and adoration for her work. Not for her relationship with her previous co-star or director.

Robert once admitted in a morning show during BD2 promotion that Kristen and he agree on what to say/how to appear to public. When they tested the water with the media after coming back from filming in Australia, we have a robsten windfall of pictures, sightings and outings with friends and as a couple. The robsten aspect of the fandom rejoiced, the rest of the world who didn’t care about twilight or Robert or Kristen just shrugged it off like another couple in show business. But somewhere for the need for more proof, more gushing feel good moments to confirm how epic the romance these two have, we have all crossed the line many times.

Rob also said that no one but Kristen understands the world he is living in. They are just normal people who work hard, fight for what they love and protect what they love most, no one should find fault in that. As we bicker on with controversies, conspiracy theories etc the mainstream media is just treating this like any news day in show business. Someone is having a new gf, someone is selling a new album, someone is promoting a new movie. It is just hand holding, with the paparazzi and fans as audience with the most reaction. He has done a lot more in movies. Whatever the audience may be, he is after all just ACTING.

I am thankful for Kristen and Robert for inspiring so many people with their beautiful love story. They are continuing their lives as we all should, do something creative, make someone happy, be kind to another, help someone if you can, enjoy music and movies, and do no harm to anyone. Their romance, their marriage is only for them to tell if they ever want to share. Our concerns and hurts are so remote from their real lives’ problems. We are only fans, we are only entitled to see a tiny aspect of their lives, but a whole lot of their professional lives, for that I am thankful.

katharinespants  asked:

what kind of thing does the 1d fandom do? haha I had no idea!

oh my god, you’ll regret getting me started but here’s a short list:

  • racism: they say they “love their boys” or w/e but constantly shit on zayn (the only non-white member), making fun of his race, religion, etc. it got to a point a few months ago where he had to delete his twitter because his mom and girlfriend were so upset by the insults they were seeing.
  • misogyny: they insulted/bullied liam’s girlfriend to the point where they broke up, and do the same to louis’ girlfriend (which is probably why he barely ever discusses her in public). they also slut-shamed the shit out of caroline flack (i think that’s her name) when she dated harry.
  • homophobia/fetishism: they’ve deluded themselves into thinking that harry/louis are in love with each other even though louis called it bullshit. they then took their craziness to the next level by asking louis to sign a balloon (wtf why a balloon?) that said “i ship bullshit” even though they know he hates it. louis and harry are straight, but even if they weren’t, their obnoxious fans are trying to FORCE them to come out of the closet which is not okay at all.

and then they make stupid au memes like this:

anonymous asked:

Okay, so I promise I searched your blog before asking this. I had heard about jj calling the mind reading part of the interrogation with rey "vicious mind rape." So I looked up the source and turned out to be a second hand source --the wife of the guy who was gifted a viewing of TFA because he was dying of cancer. Apparently the man kept zoning out and falling asleep b/c of medicine and he perceived the interrogation as a rape scene. His wife did not agree and apologized (bc the drugs) 1/2

So my answer to you is going to be kind of short. Really terse, and kind of angry. And I’m not angry at you (so don’t misunderstand this), but at the situation on this site at large. I have very little patience for people shoving this sort of thing in my face, time and time again - especially when I’ve already addressed the subject in varying ways (yes, I have). I have even less patience for people trying to poison fandom with their toxicity (when they are utterly meaningless to the fandom at large). I have ZERO patience for people who haven’t suffered from abuse telling abuse survivors what they can and cannot like. When you combine all these factors together, it’s a dangerous brew. It’s dangerous because I fought too hard and too long to have my own voice heard, and I will viciously defend that voice to the death.

And normally I ignore them, these antis (as you call them). Normally I let these people scream at the stars that they’re important, because everyone needs a dream to believe in, and wow. Wow, how empty your lives must be, that you have nothing better to do with your time then hate on a fictional ship that literally no one else cares about. Ohtze don’t play with that. I go after bigger prey; bigger fish in the ocean, who are infinitely more dangerous than you. But if you needle me enough, I will eventually bite back. And you don’t want me biting back, because when you finally, finally get my attention fixated on you, it is a horrible place to be in. I tend to go nuclear.

I’m not going to address the abuse angle too much, except to say that women usually know what rape is more then men. I’m sorry, but that’s the cold, harsh truth of it. And if a woman (see: the wife) says something’s not rape, but you still believe a dying man and another man who has a ton of power (see: JJ) over HER - then wow. WOW. Once again, people are believing a man over a woman when she tries to speak the truth about rape, whether its towards herself or another woman. Congratulations, antis: you just recreated the absolutely traumatic, real-life power imbalance that women go through when they’ve been sexually assaulted and they try to report it. The absolutely enraging, mind-wrecking dynamic where everyone believes anything else other than you. When they believe a DYING man over you. Congratulations: you have just become as problematic as the rape apologists that you rail against. You hypocrites. Take your savior complex elsewhere.

I’m not going to go into my own personal experiences with violence, because I shouldn’t have to drag my own trauma out into the open to justify a ship. That’s the exact opposite of what you want to do with survivors of any sort, and once again, the hypocrisy in this stance – that you must bare your wounds to the world in order to make it okay for you to make up your OWN mind on what YOU like – is revolting. Because isn’t tumblr supposed to be about protecting survivors? Aren’t they supposed to be a haven for the oppressed, the traumatized, the marginalized? A “safe space” for people to recover in? Or is only the oppressed, the traumatized, and the marginalized that YOU approve of? The ones that further your own personal savior narrative? But here: a refresher for people on abuse (and my personal experience with violence). Here: an explanation on the in-canon context of how Kylo treats Rey, and why its not abuse. Here: Death and the Maiden, AGAIN, explaining all of this in DETAIL. And you people that are lurking my blog waiting for me to mess up should read the whole thing: you should read the END, where I say that the the subtext between Kylo and Rey is very, very important. That they actually shouldn’t be together, because if they do - if Rey loses her agency, and the subtext isn’t addressed - then it becomes abusive. You should do your homework, because I have no tolerance for this. And I know you’re lurking. I see you. Ohtze sees everything.

As someone who’s got some skeletons in their closet - and as a woman - the interrogation scene did not translate to rape to me. If it had, I would have ended up leaving the theater/puking my guts out. The interrogation scene did not translate into rape for a lot of people. And if JJ says in an interview (retroactively, might I add), that this was rape? How like a MAN it is, to say you can’t be a woman AND a hero if you haven’t been raped. How misogynistic and cliché it is, to say that a woman MUST be violated in order for you to empathize with her; that she had to be raped in order to further a MAN’s narrative (see: Kylo’s). You hear that antis? I’m calling you out on your hypocritical, problematic behavior again.

As I said in Death and the Maiden, there’s intent (what you plan to put into your work) and there’s the reception to that intent – what people glean from it. You have no control over the latter. None. Once you put something out there, once its published, and a huge swath of the viewing audience takes something one way (see: not rape), you can’t retroactively go back and say “no, I meant THIS.” That’s not how the consumption of media WORKS. So if JJ intended otherwise, then it’s his fault. His failing as a director and a screenwriter. But it’s out of his hands now, so this is a moot point.

Congratulations. You have officially gotten me agitated. I am now going back to blogging about dinosaurs and pictures of BB-8, because Ohtze’s blog should be a happy place full of sunshine and rainbows and gifs of Adam Driver. I refuse to let bottom feeders infest my fandom.

A New Comers Guide to Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers, and Tony Stark.

I got really tired and really offended in one fell swoop and POOF a post.

Guys! It doesn’t matter to me one iota whether or not an Avengers fan has read all the comics, a single comic, or whether or not they need explaining what a comic is. A fan is a fan is a fan, and if it’s the movies that won you then I say welcome! Welcome to the strange beautiful world that is Marvel and I hope you enjoy.

I’m really not writing this to downplay anybody’s ship or promote mine. I know what I ship but Steve and Bucky’s bond in the movie is real.  It’s there and I don’t get down on people for shipping, so ship on I say. But… it’s frankly rude as fuck to walk into a fandom that has been active for half a century and start throwing your weight because you think how they looked at each other in three seconds of film negates everything the comics built before. Just on principle you know, on a fan to fan, good way to avoid unnecessary wank level. Am I  right? Okay lets do this.

It’s a respect thing. Respect for the very characters whose screen adaptations caught you by the heart strings. Respect for the decades upon decades of work that has gone into these characters, their personalities and possibilities long before either you I or these movies were even a thought. Comic book canon is a thing. THE THING that made it all possible. Before there was film there were Marvel fans with thoughts feelings and meta about these comic characters- and you don’t have to be part of that to qualify as a fan, but you at least have to know a thing or two about it to qualify having an opinion about their supposed destinies worth reading. So this is a post about catching up.

Keep reading

Sasuke arrived 15 minutes late to battlefield with Starbucks

In which Sasuke has a tumblr account.

Sasuke was annoyed. Not that such thing isn’t common, but he really was. Completely and utterly annoyed. He let a heavy sigh escape his lips while he tried to calm himself down. Then, he proceeded to scroll down the page to keep reading the content that had just infuriated him minutes ago.

He was reading the fandom’s opinion of chapter 627, the latest manga chapter of Naruto, in which he, as awesome a he was, had just left the role of antagonist to become the new potential hero of the story.

Hn, in your face, dobe.

Of course he was doing that because of boredom, not that the opinion of a bunch of crazy fangirls and fanboys mattered to him. His decisions were no one’s business. The only reason why Sasuke was checking his tumblr account - which no one on Earth knew about, and if someone knew, he would personally make sure to get rid of such menace - was because while the now revived Hokages were doing some show-off on the top of their respective statues, he had nothing better to do for the moment while waiting for them to go to kick Madara’s ass.

That had been the exact same reason why he actually created his account a few years ago, during his training with Orochimaru. He needed something better to do after his training rather than hanging around with the sannin and Kabuto, which had pretty weird habits that Sasuke didn’t want to adopt. And that is how his tumblr account was born. However, he barely used it. He was way too cool for that. Too cool to publish hatred and revenge quotes on his blog. And definitely too cool to publish random philosophical thoughts about the meaning of life, shinobi and tomatoes, especially these last months.

(And yes, all that “too cool” excuse was rubbish and Sasuke knew it, because his tumblr was the most emotional blog ever owned by a shinobi in the whole world, and he actually did publish all that stuff, but he would always deny it because that was the only way to preserve his dignity).

However, back to the point.

Sasuke was ANNOYED.

He frowned at the screen of his smartphone while he continued checking the “naruto 627” tag. Sure, the Naruto fandom had practically exploded with the last news. Sasuke knew he was one of the favorite characters there - he was freaking Sasuke Uchiha - but he couldn’t deny some of the fans’ reactions were quite disturbing…

At the beginning, he had read the typical fangirl rant about how awesome and cool and AMAZING he was, because he was the ONE AND ONLY SASUKE-KUN and all that stuff. He had sighed deeply, while trying to accept the fact that he would never get rid of his fangirls. However, as he continued to scroll down, the comments became more and more offensive.

“OMG! My precious baby Sasuke-kun has finally seen the light!”

“Our little Sasuke is growing up, I feel like a proud parent!”

“Sasuke was lost in the road of life, lol”

“Took you long enough, Sasuke!”

“Sasuke finally came to his senses!”

“I’ve waited five fucking years for this, Sasuke. FIVE FUCKING YEARS!”

“It’s about time, you irrational prick”

“You little shit, I don’t trust you a bit”

He glared at the screen. Hadn’t he finally decided to do what ALL these people wanted him to do from the first time? To go fight with the Shinobi Alliance? If they really wanted him to return, then they should wait whatever it takes him to do so.

‘Hn’ he grunted. Haters gonna hate.

He continued looking at the comments, only to find one that caught his particular attention.

“If you apologized to Karin, you BETTER apologize to everyone else, especially Naruto and Sakura and all the Leaf’s shinobi!”

Sasuke stared icily at the screen. He already knew what he had to do after returning to the village. He didn’t need anyone to remind him of that. Apologizing meant that he recognized his mistakes, and how he screwed up everything in the past.

It had been easy to apologize to Karin. Sasuke admitted that, the moment when he had stabbed her, he hadn’t been in the best mental conditions. He had never expected her to react in such a masochist way by confirming her adoration for him, though. However, when he had screwed up things with his ex- teammates, he had done so fully aware of his actions. He didn’t have any excuse, and apologizing would be something hard to do, but necessary.

Still, arriving to the battlefield with a legendary sannin, a team of strong experimental shinobi and four resurrected legends of the shinobi world would probably be enough for an apology, right?

He kept scrolling down, with his guilt feelings now dissipated, when he found a comment that made him cringe.

“THE PRESENT MINATO IS GONNA GIVE NARUTO IS SASUKE WRAPPED WITH A BOW!”

What. The. Hell.

Now Sasuke didn’t have any idea of what these guys were talking about. Why on Earth the Fourth Hokage would give a present to Naruto? And why would that present would be specifically him… wrapped with a BOW?

These brats didn’t know what respect was. They were messing with an Uchiha. And no one could mess with an Uchiha.

But apparently, they could. And in the most sassy ways.

Sasuke almost choked with saliva after seeing the next posts on the page. He had came across some very… graphical images of him, engaging in physical contact activities with his teammates, and also with Karin. The images were accompanied by some “Sasusaku”, “Sasukarin” and even some “Sasunaru” theories about the development of the series. Sasuke was smart enough to deduce what those terms meant. He just stared at the screen with a tic on his eye.

Sick people.

He couldn’t believe they actually were so obsessed with his private life. Especially his romantic life. Not even HE was so interested in it. He grunted, completely annoyed. His romantic life was his business. He knew he had to make some improvements in it, but that could wait after the war. He wouldn’t be able to revive his clan if Madara managed to activate the Infinite Tsukuyomi, after all. But there was no way in hell he was letting that crazy Madara do that.

Over my dead body, he swore.

Finally, the last post he read was one that made him raise an elegant eyebrow while reading it.

“Sasuke arriving 15 minutes late to battlefield with Starbucks”

He snorted slightly, amused. That was just ridiculous. Completely absurd. How could they even imagine the possibility of him, arriving to the battlefield with Starbucks? That just didn’t fit with the Uchiha profile…

Sasuke then took the last sip of his Starbucks Cappuccino - with no sugar - before logging out from tumblr, while he went to call the others to head to the battlefield.

…he would obviously finish his coffee before arriving.

I wrote this like a year ago inspired by the manga chapter, but after seeing idrawduckies’s edit, I just couldn’t help posting it.

I MEAN

This is just GOLD

(My fic is also posted in FF!)