ptsdean

anonymous asked:

do you know any good fics in which dean has to go through a LOT of emotional pain

bro okay so like….this is 90% of what I read ngl, so here’s a short list of stuff off the top of my head that I’ve either read A Lot or bookmarked recently

like moses and batman and james dean is the story of dean having intimacy issues in his later life because he prostituted himself when he was younger

homeward bound is one of my fave WIPs right now. it’s a HS au with an angsty twist I won’t give away, but it is currently working through dean’s mindset in the wake of his whole world falling apart so so brilliantly. And it’s updated regularly! As a matter of fact, go read everything by Englandwouldfall. Lots of gr8 dean angst and very skilled character writing, and i’m constantly lamenting that their stuff isn’t anywhere near appreciated enough.

living in agony is one of my all-time faves and HOOO boy it deals with dean working through being a poor closeted lil bab so so so so well. Let’s just say Living in Agony is a very apt title and unf that’s some Grade A angst.

kingdom come is another of my all-time faves, though it has been removed by the author, so this is a link to the epub on my google drive. it’s the story of PTSDean who’s pretty much lost everything trying to find his footing in the world again and it’s SO harsh and SO GOOD.

breath of all things is a no-brainer, in case you haven’t hit that one yet. AU in which dean is paralyzed in an accident that killed his father and experiences GREAT MENTAL TORMENT tryin to climb his way back outta that pit. so gooooood.

the whole violator/revelation series is pretty loaded with omega!dean abandonment issues, and it’s a jolly good time, like a great deal of moosefeels’ stuff is

i looooove the supernatural edification of dean winchester, it’s such an amazing concept with a cool execution, but fair warning, it’s pretty much abandoned. it’s an au wherein dean is a spiritual medium kind of ala the sixth sense, and it leaves him super isolated and Tortured and Suffering.

and just because this is an LJ-era fic and I never see it recced anywhere but I think of it often, here’s a fuckin ff.net link to one of my fave pre-cas (HET!!!) series the drive!verse, available there in several stories, starting with drive all night. it’s basically early series dean coping with abandonment, chronic pain, and a permanent injury. spoilers: he doesn’t do it well. bonus caretaker!sam angst. 

space-jaam  asked:

after u receive this, u must share 5 random facts about urself (but only if u want to) and then copy and send to some of ur followers, or u can just post it either way is fine friend (・ω・) <33

oh man, five random facts? well, okay!

1. i tend to get lost a lot, especially while driving. if it’s out of my bubble of local area knowledge, one should just assume i got lost and am trying to get google maps to work while simultaneously telling myself “it’s around here somewhere; if i’m stubborn enough i’ll find it!”

2. i have yet to break a bone! all thanks to drinking milk constantly as a kid, i suppose.

3. i’m double-jointed in all of my fingers.

4. i have a small scar on the palm of my right hand from the time i broke a test tube in 11th grade chemistry.

5. in first and second grade i was a bonafide gang leader. my gang was smaller than our rival gang, but our territory included the swings and the play structure and all the space up to the tether ball. we also had informants from time to time. it was all very legit.

thanks for asking, friend!