psychologized

Good Habits to Develop

1. Set yourself some daily goals. Keep them realistic and achievable. That will give direction – so you don’t fritter your time.

2. Read inspirational books and blogs; hang around people who are positive.

3. Stay in touch with what’s happening in the world. We’re not just islands – we are part of one another.

4. Make the effort to stay in touch. Just a “like” on facebook, or a brief text message, conveys to that person that they matter to you.

5. Invest some time in your appearance and health. We’re more confident when we look and feel our best.

6. Pay attention to your priorities. Do what’s most important, and not most urgent, first. (Note: If you never learn to prioritise then everything seems urgent – and that’s what runs your life!)

7. Smile. It makes people feel more positive towards you – and it tends to lift our mood, and enhance our feelings, too.

8. Tidy as you go. It’s easier to work, and you’ll feel a lot less stressed, if you’re working somewhere that’s devoid of clutter. Also, if you tidy as you go then it feels less overwhelming.

9. Include some margin in your life so you don’t feel so stressed, as unexpected things always eat away our time. Expect that to happen – and leave some extra time.

10. Take time for yourself as you need to relax, unwind, recover, and recharge your batteries.

There will be no one like us when we are gone, but then there is no one like anyone else, ever. When people die, they cannot be replaced. They leave holes that cannot be filled, for it is the fate - the genetic and neural fate - of every human being to be a unique individual, to find his own path, to live his own life, to die his own death.
—  Oliver Sacks

“Psychology has falsified love as surrender and altruism, while it is an appropriation or a bestowal following from a super-abundance of personality. Only the most complete persons can love. The depersonalized and objective are the worst lovers. This also applies to love of God or the fatherland. One must be rooted in oneself.”

—F. Nietzsche, The Will to Power, §296 (edited excerpt).

Healthy Self-Esteem v Low Self-Esteem

The following are indicators of healthy self-esteem:

- Being quietly confident in yourself, and your skills and abilities

- Being comfortable with a range of emotions

- Being able to regulate strong emotions

- Being self-directed; taking the initiative with others and with projects

- Having an awareness of, and a respect for, your personal limitations

- Being willing to accept the limitations and mistakes of others

- Accepting that growth and progress take time (and being patient with process of learning and changing)

- Knowing your strengths and abilities; taking pride in your work and achievements

- Being optimistic having a positive outlook on life

- Having the ability to work on, and solve, problems

- Being independent and responsible

- Being able to co-operate and work well with others

- Having the ability to say “no”

The following are indicators of low self-esteem:

- Having a negative and pessimistic outlook on life

- Thinking that you are inferior to others

- Feeling inadequate; believing that your “don’t have what it takes” to succeed or excel in life

- Being a perfectionist; being harsh, critical and unfairly demanding of yourself

- Being mistrustful of others – including those who show kindness, warmth and affection

- Blaming (yourself and others); being defensive

- Having a dislike of competition; being afraid of taking risks

- Feeling unloved and unlovable

- Expecting to be mistreated, abandoned and rejected

- Letting other people always make the decisions; being afraid to speak up and share your point of view

- Being afraid of being mocked or ridiculed

- Having a deep sense of shame, and a fear of being humiliated.

Wisdom is the instantaneous recognition that a crisis is a blessing, and even greater wisdom recognizes that blessings can also trigger a crisis. When we truly understand that, we’re less likely to be upset about difficulties or elated about opportunities; we remain centered no matter what happens around us. That is one of the secrets of self-mastery.
—  John Demartini, The Breakthrough Experience (pg 12)
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19/02/2017

Did a nice bit of studying today! I’m writing notes from my Personality and Individual Differences textbook before the semester starts, because I want to get ahead while I can.

Thought I’d add in some photos that show my love for coffee, too. My beloved Nespresso machine is always there for me!

The fruit salad matched my colouring scheme for this unit PERFECTLY and it made me so happy!!!

Day 21

I used to think I couldn’t be the way that I am, because I am able to accept responsibility for my actions. But then I started to think about it, and realised that I don’t. Not really.

I will apologise when I can see that my actions have caused harm, if it suits me to say sorry. Sometimes I may be bored of a fight I caused, so I’ll apologise. This doesn’t mean I accept responsibility. I still believe the other person is in the wrong, truly, but I’m able to say sorry.

I do this subconsciously and have managed to trick myself into believing I’m a better person than I am because I adapt to other people and situations without really thinking about it anymore.