pseudopods

Podcast rec list

My old podcast rec/request list is still getting notes so I figured I’d make a new list with everything I’ve downloaded since then. Favourites are italicized*.

For updates, please check @insomniac-podcaster.

Audio drama (Fantasy)

  • Alba Salix, Royal Physician* - Follows trials and tribulations of Farloria’s head witch of the House of Healing, Alba Salix. It is a 6-part mini-series (+ bonuses) with no future episodes currently planned.
  • The Behemoth -  15-year-old Madyson tells the story of the Behemoth, a large, lumbering beast that has emerged from the waters off of Cape Cod. It will be a 20-part mini-series.
  • Hello From the Magic Tavern - An improv comedy podcast hosted by Arnie, a man who accidentally passed through a portal into the land of “Foon”. Every week Arnie interviews patrons of the Vermilion Minotaur tavern including monsters, wizard, and adventurers.

Audio drama (Horror)

  • Alice Isn’t Dead* - A truck driver searches across America for the wife she had long assumed was dead, encountering not-quite-human serial murderers, towns literally lost in time, and a conspiracy that goes way beyond one missing woman along the way. This podcast is produced by the same people who brought you Welcome to Night Vale.
  • Archive 81 - These are the recovered tapes of missing archivist Daniel Powell, posted by a well-meaning friend hoping to locate him.
  • Help Me - Nicole investigates the mysterious death of her friend Olivia and possible link to a dangerous entity. It is a 15-part mini-series with no future episodes currently planned.
  • Limetown* - Radio host Lia Haddock investigates the sudden disappearance of the residents of Limetown. It is a 7-part mini-series (+ bonuses) with future seasons (and possibly a TV show) in the works.
  • Return Home - Jonathan Baker returns to his home town after being contacted by a mysterious entity. Episodes are broken up into multiple parts aired every week, with breaks between episodes.

Audio drama (Pseudo-radio show)

  • The Black Tapes* - (horror) A weekly radio show hosted by Alex Reagan that investigates unsolved paranormal phenomenon documented by the Strand Institute. They also produce TANIS.
  • The Message* - (sci-fi) Nicky Tomalin documents the work of a team of cryptologists as the attempt to decipher an alien message. It is an 8-part mini-series.
  • Good Morning Zakera Ward - (sci-fi, Mass Effect) A morning radio show set in the Mass Effect universe. It is an 11-part series that appears to have ended abruptly, but is still worth a listen if you’re a fan of the games.
  • King Falls AM - (sci-fi/fantasy) A late-night talk show from quaint town of King Falls that is frequently interrupted by peculiar happenings and paranormal events.
  • TANIS - (horror) A docu-drama series hosted by Nic Silver exploring the myth and conspiracy of Tanis. They also produce The Black Tapes.
  • Welcome to Night Vale - (cosmic horror)  Community radio updates for the small desert town of Night Vale, featuring local weather, news, announcements from the Sheriff’s Secret Police, mysterious lights in the night sky, dark hooded figures with unknowable powers, and cultural events.

Audio drama (Sci-Fi)

  • ars PARADOXICA* - A journey through spacetime and the Cold War with Dr. Sally Grissom, a physicist send back in time when an experiment goes awry.
  • The Bright Sessions* - The recorded therapy sessions of Dr. Bright, who provides support for patients with unusual talents. ((It’s more of a paranormal drama that a true sci-fi)).
  • The Bunker - A breakfast radio show broadcast back in time to us from the post-apocalyptic year 2414. It’s a 12-part mini-series, and the developers are currently working on another sci-fi series that will be titled Mars Corp.
  • EOS 10* - The adventures of two maladjusted doctors, their medical team, and a hypochondriac ex-prince aboard an intergalactic travel hub.
  • Kakos Industries - Corporate announcements for Kakos Industries, a corporation dedicated to helping you ‘do evil better’.
  • Liberty - Tales from Atrius, a colony cut off from humanity and racked by civil war, and the surrounding lawless expanse known as the Fringe. It consists of multiple mini-series.
  • Sayer - Acclimate to life on Earth’s man-made second moon, Typhon, with the assistance of the self-aware AI SAYER.
  • Thrilling Adventure Hour - A podcast in the style of an old-timey radio show consisting of the regular sub-series ‘Sparks Nevada: Marshall on Mars’ and ‘Beyond Belief’ as well as other segments.
  • Wolf 359*** - Follows the crew of the U.S.S. Hephaestus Research Station as they orbit around the red dwarf Wolf 359. This is my all-time favourite series - you should be downloading it right now… unless you’ve already heard it in which case you should definitely treat yourself and listen to it again.

Informational

  • Dan Carlin’s Hardcore History - As the title implies, this is really hardcore history. Episodes are exceedingly well-researched and is surprisingly easy to listen to considering the density of the subject matter.
  • Lore - A podcast examining myths and folktales alongside the true dark stories that either inspired or arose from them. A chilling listen that also has a TV show in the works.
  • Myths and Legends - Re-tellings of both popular and obscure legends that make them very accessible to a modern audience (i.e. people like me who DON’T read Beowulf in it’s original Old English for fun in their free time).
  • Sleep With Me* - Honestly, I have no idea what this podcast is actually about because Ackerman’s ramblings are so soothing I’m usually asleep shortly after turning it on. If you have insomnia and problems falling asleep to silence (like myself), this is a must-download - it’s more engaging that rain/wave/whale noises but you don’t have to worry about missing anything.

Literature

  • Escape Pod - Every episode consists of a sci-fi short story from a variety of sub-genres, and they are generally 30-60 minutes in length. If you enjoy Escape Pod, also check out their fantasy (PodCastle) and horror (PseudoPod) podcasts.
  • The NoSleep Podcast - Narrations of short horror stories posted to the NoSleep reddit board. It’s featured horror stories for every squick and trigger imaginable so be careful with this one if you aren’t into hardcore horror, and definitely heed the warnings at the beginnings of episodes.

True Crime

  • Serial - I don’t think it’s possible to be a podcast fan and not have (at the very least) heard about Serial. If you haven’t listened to it yet, definitely give it a go - there’s a reason it was at the top of the (Canadian) iTunes store for close to a year. It’s produced by ‘This American Life’, which is another professionally-produced podcast worthy of downloading.
  • Someone Knows Something - A series produced by CBC that examines unsolved cases of missing or murdered individuals.
  • Thin Air Podcast - Two English majors investigate cold cases by examining evidence and interviewing people involved with the original investigation.

Pending - I either haven’t started these or haven’t listened to enough to categorize them, but most have been rec’d by multiple sources so check them out!

  • A New Winter - A first-hand account of the unsolved murders and disappearances of 25 people in a small UK village.
  • The Cleansed: A Post-Apocalyptic Saga - (audio drama - sci-fi) An epic post-apocalyptic saga set in a world ravaged by fossil fuel scarcity.
  • Greater Boston - An audio drama set in Boston that blends the real and the unreal, the historical and the fantastical.
  • Hadron Gospel Hour - (audio drama - sci-fi)A sci-fi comedy/adventure following a duo of scientists stranded ouside of spacetime in the Hadron Bunker.
  • Jim Robbie and the Wanderers - (audio drama - sci-fi) Follows two female musicians travelling surreal America with their robot companion, Jim Robbie.
  • Monster Talk - (informational) Examines the science behind cryptozoological and legendary monsters. 
  • The Night Blogger - (audio drama - paranormal) It appears to follow blogger Brian Foster’s encounters with the paranormal.
  • Our Fair City - (audio drama - sci-fi) A campy (their words), post-apocalyptic audio drama.
  • Pete’s Paranormal Chronicles -  (audio drama) In 1996, Pete Schwartz began work on a documentary series called Pete’s Paranormal Chronicles, but his sanity began to unravel during the production of the program and he became completely immersed in a nationwide conspiracy.
  • The Twilight World of Ultimate Smoothness - A podcast chronicling the decline and fall of radio veteran Greg Willis. It is a 6-part mini-series.
  • Ruby: The Adventures of a Galactic Gumshoe -  (audio drama) Ruby is a hip, tough-talking detective hired to track down the malefactors who are manipulating the media on the planet Summa Nulla (the “high point of nothing”).
  • Unexplained - (informational) A podcast about strange and mysterious real-life events that continue to evade explanation.

As always, if there’s a podcast you like that’s missing from this list, please drop me a line (message, ask, fan mail, raven, etc. etc.) and I’ll check it out! I’ll also be adding a podcast link to my blog featuring this list with updates. Enjoy~

Monsters of Innistrad in D&D: Hanweir, the Writhing Township

After the popularity of the Gitrog post, I decided to make another one of my favourite creatures, also a horror of Innistrad. Of all the effects of Emrakul’s presence on Innistrad, Hanweir was my favourite. It was just so genuinely unnerving reading the Hanweir chronicle as the town’s community became more and more insular until it became one gigantic walking horror.

A Wandering Town. The coming of Emrakul has left Innistrad crawling with hundreds of mutated horrors, but none that match the size and terror of the town of Hanweir. Once a well-known township, Hanweir fell to gross mutation, becoming something so aberrant that many of those who see it fall to madness.

Born of Paranoia. Prior to the arrival of Emrakul, as the angels of Innistrad turned on the humans, the town of Hanweir concluded that they could protect themselves through isolation from the outside threats. The town became increasingly insular and distrusting of any outsiders, the paranoia of the townsfolk culminating in the building of a gateless wall, in the belief that the town and its people would be ready for any threat that could approach. Hanweir was never attacked. Instead, the warping presence of Emrakul fused the maddened townsfolk with the brickwork of their town, and the very wall built to defend it.

We are Emrakul. The town of Hanweir engulfs those unfortunate enough to fall in its path. As they become fused to the town, and a part of Hanweir, those who fall prey to the town lose all free will, acting little more than another limb for the writhing horror.

Warped Townsfolk

My main points of reference were the Hanweir chronicle articles, and the card itself. To simulate the size of the walking town, I based the stats, particularly health-wise, on the largest creatures in D&D, namely the Tarrasque. To make the size count in-game, the Massive Pseudopod attacks send out shockwaves on impact, which also served nicely to mirror the card’s trample mechanic, dealing damage to creatures other than the initial target. 

I also took inspiration from the different types of Oozes, since Hanweir is the same creature type. As such, the “We Are Emrakul” ability is heavily based on the engulf ability of other oozes such as the gelatinous cube.

The basis for the Warped Townsfolk/Eldrazi Horrors falling from the town was adapted from the limb-dropping Strahd Zombies, the Townsfolk themselves being an amalgamation combined from the stats of a Commoner and Giant Octopus.


This is my first new post after reaching 1000 followers, which has come as a total shock to me, and I’m so pleased to see that so many people are engaging with my homebrew designs. I will be making another post this weekend about reaching this milestone, and what is happening as a result, so stay tuned!

spinelessspider  asked:

Do you still write? I've just read up to chapter 5 of tsg, which is brilliant and I don't know if you've abandoned it or smthing because it's incomplete which i mean is fine. But I do want to know if you write still because your work is brilliant and it just makes me FEEL things and also your blog seems to be kinda inactive so maybe you'll never see these, but it's worth a shot.

Thank you so much for your Extremely Nice Words, which mean a great deal to me – making people feel things with a capital FEE is honestly the best thing I can ever hope to achieve. I figured your message was an extremely good jumping-off-point to note:

1. I’m so grateful for everyone who reads my writing and gets something out of it, even if that writing is the Animorphs parody I wrote when I was eleven years old that solely makes fun of the X-Files movie, a cultural touchstone that has not aged well;

2. I haven’t abandoned my fannish writing, and though TSG may not appear in the same format as before (I’m so happy fandom lately has taken to posting “What Would’ve Happened” outlines) it ain’t dead;

3. There are links in my ABOUT page to all my current work, though I gotta update it with a couple of reprints coming out that are nice and accessible. I am partcularly fond of the Pseudopod podcast done of a horror short story I did a few years back, “The Magician’s Apprentice”, read by the absolutely incredible Louise Ratcliffe;

4. Lastly, the reason why I have been inactive is because I have spent every spare moment of my last year that I could finishing up an extremely large project. I can only reassure you that this has been the inactive silence before a garbage storm of such huge and rubbishy proportions that it will make people reverent. I have been creating a huge trash receptacle, packed full of refuse. If you have ever enjoyed my bin leavings before, I can only assure you that this debris tub* is FOR YOU.



* I wrote a novel.

Requested Anonymously

Trubbish is one of those pokémon that people love to hate. It is, after all, literally garbage. All ominous messages about the importance of environmental preservation aside, Trubbish is a trash bag that gained consciousness one day and turned into a pokémon. So…how did that happen?

Well, garbage is already “alive” in a way. Garbage, especially organic waste such as food, attracts all sorts of microbes and bacteria. Garbage is their food: These microbes rot meat, liquefy vegetables, and break down proteins into smaller components, producing nitrogen and sulfur along the way. That’s how garbage gets its nasty smell, as we talked about in Garbodor’s entry about the poisonous gases this evolution line generates. 

Okay, but Trubbish isn’t a microbe. It’s nearly 2 feet tall, has eyes and a mouth, little pseudopod arms that it uses to beg for more trash. Well, I would like to introduce to you one of my favorite animal families of all time, the Pyrosomes:

Pyrosomes, individually, are tiny. Less than a few millimeters big, floating in the ocean helplessly. Their trick to survival is that they form colonies, teaming up with hundreds of thousands of their friends and families to form, huge, fully functional weird sea tubes capable of eating, swimming, moving, and more as if they were one organism. Pyrosome colonies have been known to grow over 60 meters long.

It’s sort of the equivalent of several children teaming up, standing on each other’s shoulders and wearing a long coat to pretend to be an adult. That’s what pyrosomes are. 

Pyrosomes weave themselves together like a basket, using a “gelatinous tunic” to glue themselves together. This jelly-like substance holds them all in place, and from there they accomplish tasks by coordinating their cilia, little arm-like hair structures they can use to move. These hundreds of thousands of pyrosomes, all glued together, essentially do “the wave” common in sports arenas. By doing this, the pyrosomes push water through the colony and into the interior of the tube. Since pyrosomes are filter feeders, the more water that is pumped through, the more they get to eat. More than that, the water that is now on the interior forms a current, creating a jet-propulsion stream that is pushed out and allows the colony to swim around as one. Feeding and movement, all in one.

You can probably see where I’m heading with Trubbish. Trubbish, before it was a sentient trash bag species, was just a pile of trash. A stinky, rotting pile of microorganisms and bacteria just living life by breaking down proteins and producing nitrogen. But what if some of those organisms evolved to take a few pages out of the Pyrosome book? What if these organisms teamed up, joined together and formed a colony. You can imagine they would look something like Trubbish. A blob of trash moving around together, constantly looking for more garbage to keep the colony fed, expelling toxic gas and waste as byproducts.

Trubbish is actually a colony of microorganisms, like pyrosomes, that have teamed up to act like one creature. It eats garbage to break down proteins, expelling poisonous gases as waste.

Ten Altairian Music Hall hits

1. Let us recreate for you the experience of being at a six-egg hive initiation, by singing about one while you sit and crack your foreknees in appreciation (a raucous knees-up).
2. Although you would expect from my age, gender and birthing rank that I am a competant leader, I am completely inept, and I will sing about this to you at great speed (a hilarious interlude).
3. Let us fertilise eggs together, without ever saying that that is what we are doing other than by euphemism and inflection (a jolly romp).
4. There is true glory in having your thorax vaporised by the massed laser ranks of Rigellian quinqueremes which we in our simple hives cannot truly comprehend (a stirring aria).
5. You might think that I am a particular gender and birthing rank, but actually I am a completely different one (a titillating burlesque).
6. At the age of 200, my coupling tentacle has lost elasticity and I am no longer attractive to my eligible hive-mates (a lament).
7. At the age of 200, my coupling tentacle has lost elasticity and I am no longer attractive to my eligible hive-mates, but nevertheless I have fallen in love with one of them (a comic ode).
8. Here is a hilarious small mammal which appears to behave like an apex species (a marvellous entertainment).
9. Would you like to see a little bit of pseudopod (a saucy waltz).
10. My hive is the best hive and the things we have stolen from other hives are all the best things (a pompous finale).

Mimic Race

submitted by fantrorillaz

(Sort of a halfway joke race I intend to actually be balanced. The main trait im worried about being overpowered is the consuming grapple.)

Mimics are born and live in dungeons and various other places for many years, it would be no surprise that after witnessing the heroics and boons of passing adventurers that a handful might want to participate themselves, forming their pseudopods to function as arms and legs when necessary.

Ability Score Increase. Your Constitution increases by 1, your Wisdom increases by 2

Age. Mimics reach maturity after just a year and can live to be up to 200 years though most are able to seclude themselves into a dormant state where they age much slower.

Alignment. Mimics feed off of passing adventurers and treasure making them not much for civilized rules. Most mimics are neutral or evilly aligned and are rarely lawful if at all.

Size. A mimic is about the size of a standard chest and can sprout spindly arms and legs that cause it to stand about as tall as a dwarf. Your size is medium.

Speed. You have a base walking speed of 30 feet

Chest Form. As an action you can shape change to look like a common chest, in order for a creature to discern whether this form is an illusion or not they must make a Perception check equal to 8+ your Stealth skill. If you are wearing armor that gives you disadvantage on stealth checks, the creature gains an advantage on their perception check. You immediately shed this form upon a successful perception check, making a movement action or being subjected to spells and spell like effects similar to find traps or locate creature.

Consuming Grapple. If you are in a situation where a creature would normally provoke an attack of opportunity while you are in chest form, you can instead grapple the creature, the creature has a disadvantage on escaping the initial grapple. While you are grappling a creature you may make an attempt to swallow it whole if it is your size or smaller. The creature must succeed a Dexterity save equal to 8 +your Proficiency bonus+ your Strength modifier, on a failed save the creature takes 1d8 piercing damage and takes half as much on a successful save. On a failed save the creature is considered grappled and must make an athletics or acrobatics check equal to the initial saving throw DC or take 1d4 acid damage, the creature repeats this save at the beginning of each of its turns, upon succeeding this save they emerge and appear 10ft away from your current location. If a creature falls to 0 hit points while inside you, you regain hit points equal to half the acid damage the creature took

Darkvision. Your senses are naturally adapted to the dim atmosphere of a dungeon. For up to 60 feet you see dim light as bright light and darkness as dim light. While in darkness or dim light you cannot discern color, only seeing shades of grey.

Unsuspecting. You are proficient in the Stealth skill

Languages. You can read and understand common, undercommon and terran but you can only speak terran


//This race is hilarious. I would probably change Consuming Grapple to just be akin to a real mimic’s ability, where if you hit, the creature becomes restrained. You will gain advantage assuming you attack the targeted creature “from hiding.“ You should probably make it a static escape DC to represent how sticky you are (a set value), maybe something in the range of 14. Not overpowered, but weaker creatures will have problems with it. You could then make a melee attack against a creature you are restraining to swallow it, then deal 1d6 acid damage each round it is restrained (up from 1d4). Only restrain/swallow one creature at a time, yadda yadda, other rules minutia about attack-grapples and swallowing whole.

//Otherwise I think the class is fairly average. I mean, there’s a doppelganger/changeling race already, I think, so this is just another form of it that’s even more restricted to only being a chest and being unable to speak to the party!

Kinktober Day 3: Tentacles

Overwatch, r76, magic AU.

I missed Kinktober Day 2, bah, and also failed to get to the actual kink for this one.  Also bah.  For @petitecreme, who gave me a bunch of Halloweeny prompts!

***

Jack has waited for a year.  A year since Gabriel died.  Only no, he hadn’t really died, had he?  They’d been fighting that warlock coven in Helsinki, and Jack had fucked up.  He’d let himself be lured out of position, trying to duel the coven master, and his mistake let them open the gate for their hellmonster before anyone could stop them.

And it was Gabriel, always the hero, who shoved Jack to the side when the beast’s great glowing maw had lunged for him.  Gabriel, who’d screamed like a man whose soul was being ripped from his body as it chewed on him.

They’d driven it back, but nothing Jack could do had stopped it from taking Gabriel with it.

His soul has spent a year in its furnace of a belly by now, the energies of his spirit and all the others it’s eaten endlessly chewed and shredded to stoke its power.  But Jack knows how to get him back.

It’s Samhain again, a year and a day after Gabriel was torn out of this dimension.  The walls between worlds are thinner now than at any other time of the year, and Jack stands in the center of a summoning circle drawn with his own blood.  It’s Gabriel’s blood too, through the power of their bonds and sworn oaths, and with those ties Jack can reach further and more powerfully than he should be able to and call the shade of his lover back from his imprisonment.

He hated every moment he had to wait.  He wanted to rip a hole between worlds and march straight into that hell dimension to drag Gabriel back.  He would’ve done it on the spot, if he’d had any chance of surviving there long enough to get to Gabriel and tear him out of that thing.

But waiting is over. He pours his own magic into the funnel of the sigils, fuels it with his own love and pain, and the lines of the circle light up around him.

He sinks down through the walls of the world and feels them part for him.  Stretches to his utmost for the sense of Gabriel he can feel.  Sinks his fingers into it, and pulls.

The inner edges of the circle split and black pours out, flooding into the circle around Jack’s feet like rising waters.  Jack watches it, brow furrowed.  “Oh, Gabriel…”

He has no body left.  He died that day Jack watched him fall through the hole to the hell dimension.  This is the pure fluid substance of his soul–poisoned with the corruption of his suffering.

Jack.  Jack can feel the word vibrate in him on a level apart from speech.  It rings with rage and betrayal.  For the first time, Jack flinches back from the blackness reaching for him.

But it’s all around him, and Gabriel won’t brook his retreat from the consequences of his own actions.  A pseudopod stretches out to grab him.  It lashes up around his legs and hips, yanks him down to his knees.

Don’t you dare.  You owe me this.

25 Synonyms for “Deceptive” and “Fake" By Mark Nichol

Assumed: pretended, as in “an assumed name,” referring to a pseudonym used to conceal one’s identity (and, as a verb, to pretend); also, several unrelated meanings Beguiling: deceptive, duplicitous, or diverting Bogus: not genuine Contrived: false or unnatural Counterfeit: imitation or insincere Delusory: deceptive Dummy: imitation (and, as a noun, a mockup); also, several unrelated meanings Ersatz: imitation or substitute (and generally inferior to the real thing) Factitious: artificial or false Fallacious: deceptive Faux: imitation (usually in the sense of a design element or fashion item that deliberately mimics a more expensive material or fabric such as marble or fur) Feigned: fictitious, or not genuine or real  Forged: imitation with intent to deceive; also, an unrelated meaning of being created by pressure and perhaps heat Fraudulent: deceitful Jive: deceitful (said of talk); also, superficial or foolish, or other unrelated meanings Misleading: deceitful Mock: imitation, in the senses of not being genuine or real Phony: counterfeit, false, or fictitious; also, hypocritical Pseudo: false (also a prefix in hyphenated and closed compounds such as pseudo-event and pseudopod) Put-on: pretended  Sham: false, not genuine Simulated: fake but intended or made to look genuine Specious: deceptively attractive, or appearing genuine or truthful  Spurious: deceitful or imitation Synthetic: not genuine; also, several unrelated meanings

Hello, one and all! I’ve recently been trying to find some creepy podcasts to listen to and figured I might as well make a big ol’ list of them for other interested parties! These range from stories of real encounters, fictional/horror stories, discussions and news about the paranormal, and probably even some other stuff! Some of them don’t seem to be updating these days, but you can still enjoy the past episodes they have to offer. Perhaps sixpenceee might like this? *crosses fingers* Anyway, I hope you like the list I put together. Feel free to add your favorites or even your own, if you have a podcast!

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Ten warnings from the future

1. We have identified that you are susceptible to acting as a conduit for intellectual viruses.
2. Do not go down to Alientown after dark, in the rain; and certainly do not see the things that there are to see there, or smell that other world and its great seas; and thus this wanderlust will pass, will pass, will pass.
3. Do not. This exoskeleton is for use as a disability aid only. Do not. It is licensed for such tasks as climbing the stairs, unscrewing jars, transporting heavy items in non-dangerous ways etc.; its use in robbery, vigilanteeism and/or the overthrow of the state is prohibited and may result in criminal charges.
4. Do not shake the pseudopod. If your guest has signalled that a human greeting is appropriate, shake the left mandible or (preferably) bow. If you do shake the pseudopod, apologise immediately and remove any spores before they fruit.
5. Temperatures exceeding unaltered human tolerance are expected between 1pm and 4pm on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. Homeless persons are recommended to report to their nearest deep shelter for work duty.
6. Caution: this is a vintage car. Sleeping at the wheel may lead to death or serious injury.
7. So it says: ‘this baguette contains nanoviruses known to the Republic of California to cause chimeric rejuvenation’. And I thought great, I hate having one old leg and one young one, maybe it’ll even out the situation’. But yeah. Don’t do that. Contaminated bread doesn’t work. In the end you always have to pay the gene scalpers.
8. There are tunnels in the desert. They are the lower half of a city severed at the old waterline, and there are many more of them than you might expect, and we will bear no responsibility for the loss of those people who wished only to see around the next corner, and the next, and the next of their sinister glory.
9. Skin thieves operate in this area. Access with unaugmented biometrics is disadvised.
10. Warning: there are those living here, in the future, who persist in the ridiculous idea that they are living in the present day; even surrounded as they are by the most baroque technological phantasies, the clones, the robots, the politics of space. And some too who think they are living in the past.

Cellules du système immunologique : cellules qui combattent les maladies dans le corps ou pathogènes.

  • n°1 : Phagocyte en phase d’endocytose du pathogène. La cellule peut capter les virus ou les bactéries, les enveloppe avec deux bras - les pseudopodes - pour l’inclure en son sein : c’est l’endocytose. L’intrus est ensuite digéré par les sucs contenus dans des petites vésicules.
  • n°3 : Lymphocytes T cytotoxiques. Ils sont spécifiques, c’est à dire que chaque type de lymphocyte ne peut tuer qu’un type de pathogène. Les cytotoxiques éliminent les cellules infectées qui circulent dans le sang en les faisant exploser de l’intérieur avec des enzymes : c’est la cytolyse.
  • n°5 : Rien à voir avec l’immunologie, les hématies ou globules rouges circulent dans le sang et transportent l’oxygène nécessaire au fonctionnement des organes.
  • n°7 : Monocytes : voyagent dans le sang. Si le corps détecte une infection, les monocytes sortent des vaisseaux et se transforment en macrophages, des cellules capables de phagocyter les agents infectieux (voir n°1).
  • n°9 : Granulocytes : cellules capables de phagocytose aussi. Contient des granules digestives. A la particularité d’avoir un noyau en plusieurs lobes, donc aussi appelé polynucléaire - à tort.
  • n°11 : Lymphocyte B. Cellule spécifique qui peut se transformer si besoin en “usine” à anticorps.

Mitose : processus de duplication de la cellule en conservant le patrimoine génétique intacte de la cellule mère.

  • n°2 : cellule normale, avec membrane, noyau et cytoplasme. La base!
  • n°6 : Interphase. Phase ou la cellule grossie avant de se séparer en deux, et ses chromosomes se multiplient par deux.
  • n°4 : Prophase. Les parois du noyau éclate, et les chromosomes deviennent visibles au microscope.
  • n°10 : Métaphase : Les chromosomes se placent en centre de la cellule.
  • n°8 : Anaphase : Ils migrent ensuite aux pôles de la cellule de façon symétrique : on retrouve les mêmes chromosomes de part et d’autres de la cellule.
  • n°12 : Télophase : La cellule se sépare en deux et l’enveloppe du noyau se reforme sur les deux ensembles de chromosomes pour avoir deux cellules identiques.

J’adooore la biologie!

Second Earth Bestiary

Some more notes, to set down some concepts and work things out.

A note on Undead: Undead have their origins in the body, memories and emotion, or raw animating spirit of living creatures including mortal humans. However, they should generally not be considered the same person, or even a whole person. Per broadly held consensus in the field of necromancy, most undead lack at least one of the vital components of the soul (ib, ren, sheut, ka, ba), with many being a body animated by a new spiritual force, or a single soul component given some discernible form. Although human undead are the most recognizable, nearly any kind of animal can exist as nearly any kind of undead.

  • Angel: Servitors of deities, angels are not strictly speaking their own entities, but may be approached in such terms for the purposes of magic invoking or evoking them. Goetists most often work with angels, and goetic angelology informs much of the terminology around them in the west. Many “angels” are less overtly an entity separate from the deity in question, and may instead be identified as avatars, emanations, or shells, among other terms. Such categorization is a subject of intense controversy in magical academia.
  • Barrow-Wight: Closely akin to mummies, barrow-wights are distinguished mainly having their physical remains bound to mounds of earth, being capable of manifesting either as incorporeal entities, or by manipulating the soil and stone around them to reach out. Small barrow-wights suitable as familiars may be something as simple as a dead bug or rodent buried in a pot of soil, and it is not unusual for necromancers utilizing them to decorate their pots and soil.
  • Bog Mummy: Sometimes identified in literature under the outdated term bogmen, bog mummies are creatures of fresh water and vegetation, created in marshes that have the appropriate mix of conditions to preserve remains. As the actual natural process of mummification takes a very long time, it is preferable for the creation of animate bog mummies to utilize rituals incorporating the sacrifice of bog butter and sphagnum.
  • Demon: A broad term for spiritual entities not otherwise easily categorized, ranging from the sinister devils and shedim to which this term is often assumed to solely refer, to beneficial penates. Terms like vettar or kami are preferred by some writers.
  • Draugr: Undead of the ocean, draugar often blur the lines between numerous creatures. Though the simplest often merely appear as bloated corpses, many exhibit strange alterations, including bearing crustacean limbs, piscine or cetacean tails, tentacles, and even tusks or wounds that open to reveal shark jaws.
  • Fairy: Extradimensional spiritual entities with radically different mindsets, fairies will at times align with mortal thinking, only to abruptly take offense at something well-intended or mundane. Though many have outwardly humanoid appearances, these are coincidental and are often revealed to be situational: a common type of fairy appears to be a winged humanoid of variable size. However, the “wings” (whatever their number) are actually the eyes of the entity, with the humanoid form being merely an extension comparable to the mouthparts of an arachnid or the trunk of an elephant, the whole entity usually existing outside ordinary reality.
  • Gargoyle: A variety of grotesque especially aligned with magic of weather and rain, they are able to create a torrent of water powerful enough to injure, or even cut metal and stone in some extreme cases.
  • Ghoul: Where vampires hunger for heat, ghouls hunger period. Necromancers have discovered that they are actually astonishingly easy to manipulate even when not bound, as the appetite that animates them caves easily to fatty food and sweets. While feral ghouls may attack and attempt to consume the living (as well as human corpses), this does not appear to be their preference and only occurs in extremes. Ghouls do not digest the food they consume, and often regurgitate it later on, having exhausted it of the lingering energies they crave—this has the somewhat ironic side effect of acting as a preservative. It has become the standard of necromancers from Underton to endow their ghouls with redundant organs in order to contain greater stores of food in case of lean times, with some even acting as animate larders with magically chilled guts that may be used to transport food for the living as well.
  • Globster: Less solid than draugar, globsters are gelatinous oceanic undead ranging from watery slime to thick rubber in consistency. Most have some distant resemblance to the mortal creature from which they are derived, albeit much more rounded or puddle-like. Globsters are often favored for their resistance to damage, though many fare poorly at fine manipulation (with the exceptions of those made from the remains of cephalopods or certain crustaceans, which are able to extend finer pseudopods).
  • Golem: Creations of theurges and other magic users in the Jewish traditions, golems are a range of beings animated from lifeless material but having the outward appearance of unique living beings so long as their magic remains active. A rare few are capable of speech, but most are mute. Though clay is the most common material of choice due to its ease of manipulation and correspondences with creation and life, other substances are used from time to time, including timber or metal.
  • Grim: A kind of undead popular in the local work of town wizards and cunning women in Christian communities, grims are semicorporeal beings animated from remains buried on church grounds, and serve as guardians against criminals and malicious entities. Some few necromancers use grims as familiars, binding them instead to small devotional objects like a portable altar. They are most frequently made from the remains of very loyal pets, especially dogs. Scholarship is presently divided on the relationship between grims and inugami.
  • Grotesque: Sculptures of an absurd or ugly nature intended for apotropaic purposes, grotesques are often animated by theurges to act as familiars. They are most popular among Christian (especially Catholic) spellcasters, but have seen use elsewhere, including among Druids. Those that are gifted with sentience show a profound sense of communal loyalty.
  • Jinni: Entities mostly seen aligned with Muslim spellcasters, Jinn are widely considered either a type of angel or demon (or whatever term of preference an individual scholar prefers), but dispute this categorization themselves and identify simply as another class of living beings like humans. They are known to be devout regardless of their personal faith, and those that enter into contract with humans often insist upon stipulations for personal prayer time.
  • Leatherjack: Undead created entirely from tanned hide or furs, leatherjacks are notable in that they especially cannot be animated from animals that were slaughtered—unlike many undead where this simply carries a greater risk, even when the necromancer was not responsible for the death, leatherjacks simply will not animate unless they are made from a creature that died a natural or accidental death. Leatherjacks are often created in a manner that pays tribute somehow to the dead animal, and tend to be especially artistic—necromancers using them as familiars often wear their leatherjacks on their person in the form of articles of clothing or costume. Makadebijiw, the Southeast Witch, is recognizable for having an entire suit of armor as her leatherjack.
  • Motley: Beings sewn together from numerous corpses, motleys are controversial in their identification as undead, for the only aspect of the soul they seem to lack is a unique ren, with many seeming to develop the remaining aspects somehow. Indeed, no one name seems to stick. They are uniquely sentient among the creations of necromancers, and like penanggalans and mummies, often qualify to practice magic on their own.
  • Mummy: Having both ren, ib, and ba, true mummies are potent undead that are difficult and expensive to create. Those made from humanoid remains often enjoy special legal protections.
  • Penanggalan: a kind of undead retaining both the ka and ba, penanggalans are near enough to mortals that many act independently. In the past (and in some backwards countries) they were regarded as a dangerous parasite, but it has since been discerned—in fact, by penanggalan researchers—that their cravings for blood may easily be substituted with any hot beverage. In necromantic literature, “penanggalan" is broadly applied and includes some entities known by other names, such as boo hags and manananggals; the general indicator seems to be the capacity to separate parts of the body in order to utilize abilities of flight and other supernatural powers.
  • Phantom: Undead only composed of ba, phantoms have intense personalities that often seem to be exaggerated from life. An animal that was loyal in life will become steadfast and unfailing as a phantom, a bellicose person will be a terrifying spirit of battle. Because of this, many necromancers bind several weak phantoms at once, switching between them as needed for different purposes.
  • Scarecrow: Unlike other undead, scarecrows (and related creations like such as poppets) are not animated through creation, bestowal, or evocation of aspects of the soul, but through the manipulation of hamingja, the power of luck and shapeshifting. They rely on the ritual assembly of numerous objects that carry the good intent and positive energies of others, freely given (ideally as gifts, rather than being requested), but are glossed as undead because such a potent use of hamingja on an inanimate object creates something very closely akin to an aspect of the soul. Scarecrows and poppets are very adept at changing their forms, even appearing as living beings.
  • Shade: An undead formed solely through sheut, the soul component identified with the literal and metaphorical shadow. Many actually do have something of a material form, being composed of a very thin layer of congealed smoke, or cinders. However, others do not, the sheut being ritually compelled to take on a semicorporeal form.
  • Skeleton: Animated from little more than bones—sometimes held together with cord, wire, or even a very thin layer of preserved skin, sometimes not—skeletons are at once an imposing and yet simple form of undead, favored by no-nonsense types as well as those with a flair for the drama and art of death.
  • Tin Soldier: Easily produced in large numbers, tin soldiers often pad the armies and mercenary companies of nations that do not have large numbers of spellcasters able to create more enduring constructs. Although they are not as sturdy as even an untrained conscript, they can march or patrol tirelessly, and are at least capable of wielding a gun, though anything with a decent range will damage a tin soldier through its mere recoil.
  • Vampire: Where penanggalans have both ka and ba, vampires have ka and ren, and while capable of sustained interactions, they fail some tests of sentience and consciousness, and are apparently only able to simulate or accidentally imitate self-awareness, rather than truly possessing it. Like penanggalans, it has been determined that they can be sustained through substances other than blood, but even human vampires of significant experience lack the capacity to function as independent individuals. These notions have lately become controversial, and there is a body both within academia and in society at large that is advocating for recognition of the personhood of vampires.
  • Wisp: Undead of plasma and electricity, wisps range from lumnous balls of gas, to cold flames, and even bounding arcs of lightning. Few are very large, usually being contained to a smaller form that can briefly grow to great size, and so they are considered to be especially well-suited to being familiars. Bound wisps almost universally animate some sort of medium, with carved gourds and tubers being popular choices; a rare few necromancers with exceptional self-control bind their wisps to their bodies, but this is widely outlawed without special documentation attesting to the qualifications of the necromancer.
  • Zombie: The simplest corporeal undead, zombies are bodies animated under the control of a necromancer. It is common for them to be missing even large sections of their bodies, but the animating magic preserves them from rot, and renders their bodies similar in temperature and texture to the living, rather than being cold and clammy as one might expect, even where they are missing the necessary organs.

Types of Pathogenic Microorganisms


The average human body contains about 10 trillion cells. Imagine how much that is! If our population was 1400 times greater in the entire world, then we still would not be more than the number of cells in the entire body. Amazing isn’t it? 

But what if I tell you the gut alone, contains 100 trillion microorganisms living within it this very minute? And hence the picture above, our world is really a microorganism’s world, we are simply the ones large enough to be seen. 

And thus we see the importance of microbiology, how exactly are these microorganisms affecting our lives? 

Most of these microorganisms are actually beneficial to our body, for example, by aiding in the process of digestion, however, there are microorganisms that are damaging to their host, either by the production of toxic products, or direct infection, and these microorganisms are termed pathogenic. 

To have an idea of this, let us talk about the types of microorganisms, and the pathogenic ones in each type, that is, the one that can give us a disease. 

Microbes that Cause Diseases

Microbes that cause diseases can be divided into 5 groups of organisms:

  1. Bacteria
  2. Fungi
  3. Protozoa
  4. Helminths and Rotifiers
  5. Viruses

There is also a recently discovered type of microbe that can cause a disease, known as a prion. 

Of these microbes, we can classify them in several different ways. 

Classification of Microbes:

Firstly, it is important to consider the status of prions and viruses. Technically, these “microbes” are not living. Prions are simply misfolded proteins, and viruses are only “alive” when they infect an organism. Thus, both prions and viruses have their own classifications. 

As for the other organisms, we can classify them in several ways:

  • Eukaryote vs Prokaryote
    • In this classification scheme, all bacteria are prokaryotes, and fungi, protozoa, helminths and rotifers are eukaryotes. 
      • The prokaryotes are further subdivided into eubacteria and archaebacteria. Eubacteria are the medically important bacteria, while archaebacteria are a group of evolutionarily distinct bacteria. 

Differences between Eukaryotes and Prokaryotes:

  • General Size
    • Eukaryotes are much larger than Prokaryotes, being about 10-100mm in diameter. 
    • Prokaryotes are much smaller, being about only 0.2-2mm in diameter. 
  • Nucleus vs Nucleoid: 
    • Eukaryotic cells contain a true nucleus, with multiple chromosomes, linear DNA, and a nuclear membrane, using mitotic apparatus to ensure chromosomes are equally distributed to the daughter cells. 
    • Prokaryotic cells contain a nucleoid, which is an area of loosely organized, circular supercondensed DNA, lacking nuclear membrane and mitotic apparatus.

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triforce-kun  asked:

I've been craving some good creepypasta lately, and I was wondering if you had any particularly good ones to recommend? I liked the Goat Man story a lot and thought maybe you knew of more like it :]

Hm, Goat man really is one of my favourites, I have a hard time picking out others to stand with it that everyone else hasn’t already heard of.

Some of my favourites that everyone has probably heard of already;

Generally I’m not a fan of the sort of “legacy characters” people try to create, like Slenderman, Jeff the Killer, Smiledog, etc, but I do have a soft spot for some of those kinda long-running overworked story ideas;

  • The Rake (when he’s being written competently, kind of a Mothman appeal)
  • BEN Drowned (so many people have put their hands on this one there’s a lot quality flux, but the original nugget of the idea was good and the person who made it put a lot of effort into making supporting game capture files and stuff)
  • NES Godzilla is basically a novel but it’s pretty well structured (can’t attest to the end, I’ve been listening to it as Mr. Creepypasta narrates it on his channel and he hasn’t gotten to the last chapter yet)

Some lesser known ones that I hadn’t heard of until I started binging youtube Creepypasta;

  • Showers Part 1, 2, and 3 - Pretty good at building atmosphere, the first part is my favourite, where they’re listening to the teacher’s story but I like how it has a lot to do with kind of how folktales evolve as people skew events and pass them on.
  • No End House - It’s kinda corny and predictable, but I dunno what to say? I enjoyed it. I stayed late at work to finish listening to it even though I ran out of work to do, it’s just, I dunno… engaging? Despite having a lot of gore-for-the-sake-of-describing-gore, overall thumbs up. I guess I’d say I appreciate it’s creativity.
  • Cervine Birth - This one probably merits some trigger warnings for pregnancy and animal abuse, it’s a really weird, unsettling short one
  • Faulty Wiring - It’s not especially unsettling, it just preys on some very specific phobias of home invasion I’ve got so your mileage may vary.
  • Gristers Part 1,2 - Solid little short story, I could see it in a published horror anthology or something. More like a thriller story than something meant to make you feel unsettled.
  • Midnight Train 1,2 - Also more like a short story than a “creepypasta” per say, but entertaining
  • The Strangest Security Tape I’ve Ever Seen - Another well written, not terribly scary one

Annnnd, on the subject of legacy spooky internet stories I always feel like everyone has already seen this but then I remember it was online before some people active on the internet these days were even born, before “creepypasta” was a thing;

  • Ted The Caver - you absolutely have to read it on the original site, the crappy Angelfire layout and slow burn to the conflict is the whole charm of it. This is like the Blair Witch of the internet, when it first went up no one had seen anything like it and there were all sorts of people insisting it was a true story, it was great.

Bonus, a couple Pseudopods I like;

Might edit this as I think of more things to add

The 10 Least Scary SCP Entries

Happy April Fool’s Day! I’m sorry I haven’t updated my Top 100 list in forever, I’ve had tons of real life shit to do lately, and haven’t had any time for new material. But, in celebration of April Fool’s Day, we’re gonna turn expectations on their heads and talk about the happiest, funniest, and most charming non-joke SCP’s on the site!

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