Look I can’t promise you perfection because I’m far from it. But I can promise you that I’ll always be patient with you even on my bad days. I can promisw that I’ll love you through every bad day, every runny nose, and all the tears in the world. I can promise you that I won’t just give up on you but I will know when to walk away. I will admit when I’m wrong but not boast when I’m right. I’ll support you in whatever you want to do even if I disagree. But most importantly, I promise to stay by your side and show you everyday how beautiful you are.
—  I can promise you that

While most eagerly waiting and anticipating for Wednesday to come around, and with it the newest Yuri!!! On Ice episode (Wednesday has never been so evasive!), I’ve been reading up on all that the fandom has had to say. Most specifically about episode 3, and even more specifically, the famous hug scene before Yuuri performs. 

I completely agree with a lot of what I’ve heard, basically about Yuuri and his growth and development, the words exchanged and their meaning, symbolic or otherwise, and of course Viktor’s reaction and how seriously he took the words (not gona get into what some have negatively said about that last part- we don’t know enough about Viktor’s character yet).

But there was something that I immediately thought when I (first) watched that scene which I haven’t seen mentioned. 

Maybe I’m not 100% correct, but this is what I thought.

Though Yuuri admitted to being a nervous performer due to a lack of confidence, he never explicitly said why he wasn’t confident. In ep 1 we were led to believe that his bad performance at the Grand Prix was because he was depressed from his beloved dog dying, and the subsequent weight gain from the sudden binge eating no doubt didn’t help.

I feel like before he skated in ep 3, he was pretty confident. Heck, he all but smirked at Yuri(o) for underestimating him which means that he has some self esteem, and knows at least a little of his worth. How else would he have made it to the Grand Prix in the first place if he didn’t believe in his talent?

I think that it was only after seeing Yuri P’s performance that he lost confidence and that was because he began to compare the two. It’s already shown that when Yuuri skates alone, he’s magnificent. That’s probably less to do with a crowd of people watching and more to do with the competitors. 

So once he understood how well Yurio performed, he realised what this meant for him. If he didn’t win, he’d lose not just the competition but most importantly Viktor. I think that moment was when he truly snapped out of the almost dream-like quality Viktor’s arrival brought and realised that he was taking his idol’s presence for granted. Only when you risk losing something do you understand what it means to you. 

Hence the hug. I think Yuuri was genuinely scared that he might lose. He’s confident in his skills, but not to the point that he’d dismiss Yurio’s performance. He realised that this might very well be his only chance ever to skate for Viktor and have his undivided attention. Seriously, if Viktor left for Russia, sure Yuuri might see him in competitions if he didn’t give up and Viktor didn’t retire, but the easy intimacy Viktor has offered Yuuri during his stay so far would never come to be again. 

So I think Yuuri latched on with everything he had, in case it was his last shot. I think the hug, for all it represented in Yuuri, showcased his fear of loss more than anything. Something he’s quite familiar with from losing his other Viktor, aka Vi-chan. 


A NaLu ch 507 One-Shot/Ficlet

Summery: All Lucy wanted to do was find her partner, everything else could wait.

A/N: This probably more a ficlet than anything. I was inspired by what Lucy could have been going through, so here is my interpretation. 


Grit, dirt, and gravel crunched beneath the soles of travel worn boots as she ran towards the sound of combat. Scorched shrubbery, melted rock surfaces, and charcoal footprints indicated his path. Potent energy clung to the trees and plants, smoke clung to the air clogging her airway. Breaths escaped her lungs in quick staccatos, making up for the lack of oxygen and rapid pace. Wrath, sadness, desperation knocked on her subconscious. Natsu’s emotions had a way of permeating her mind which had been confusing at first. Lucy shrugged it off as intuition or best friend benefits, but now as tears flowed at the intensity her concentration waned. Natsu was hurting, the kind she hadn’t seen since Igneel died. Recalling the devastation of the room when she awoke, witnessing Dimaria’s crumpled form as she muttered

“Monster, that thing, a monster…” Fear tightened her diaphragm. Surely it wasn’t Natsu, her partner, her team-mate, her friend, her family, her dragon slayer. The man who had been a constant in her life since he found her in Hargeon, a runaway with nowhere to call home. A man who had a smile that lit up Magnolia, and brightened the mood of those surrounding him, who took her hand showed her the world.  Natsu had disappeared leaving after defeating Dimaria. Lucy had been unbound, blood coating her eyes. The monster could only be him.

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From Don’t Give Away the End

You were leavin me!” He raised his voice. “What would you have done with some hick from Georgia at that school anyway? Huh? It never would have worked, I did us both a favor.”
“Yeah, because you know it all, don’t you.” She raised her voice right back. “You broke my heart and you didn’t even care and now you’re getting married like it meant nothing.”
Now he knew what to do. She had just revealed to him her Achilles heel. Her weakness and he would use it to get her to leave, because that the way it had to be. He would say everything that he didn’t believe. He did care, he always did and always would. But he didn’t have a choice now.
“That’s because it didn’t mean anything.” He roared. “It was just kids’ stuff, it didn’t matter.”
The same thing he told her two years ago. She was furious, as furious as she was then. If she was a violent woman she would have smacked him.
“It meant something to me, you meant something to me.” She stepped closer, raising her voice slightly. She screwed up her courage and looked right into his eyes, as she got closer.
Then her voice was soft and she wasn’t yelling. She stared at him, he wanted to look away but he couldn’t. She was too close.
“It mattered.” She whispered.

I want the cliche kisses in photo booths. And the candid photos of me when I’m not looking. I want the week long road trips with the widows down and my feet up on the dash. I want hands clenched tight when we’re intimate. I want shared showers the morning after. I want breakfast in nothing but oversized t-shirts. I want tv show marathons with extra buttery popcorn and makeout breaks during commercials. I want “I love you"s and “you’re beautiful"s and my name blended in curse words while you moan. I want time and promise and happiness and intimacy.