project: unrequited love

A student asked a teacher:
“What’s the difference between I like you and I love you?

The teacher beautifully answered with:
“Well it’s like a flower. If you like a flower, you pluck it.
If you love a flower, you water it everyday and take care of it.
i tore down the walls of my heart for you because i thought you wanted to come in, but all you did was linger outside only to leave in the end.
—  and now i’m left trying to rebuild it all over again.
I want someone who, despite every push I give to that person, every wall I put outside my heart, will overcome it and still say, “You are worth it to me.”
—  Excerpt from the book I’ll never write #55
There’s this part of me that sometimes hopes and thinks, “What if he loves me? What if he really cares for me? What if he’s different?” And I think everyone of us who at some point in our life had been at the giving end of unrequited love had perhaps thought of those things.

Today, it’s as if all those what if questions were finally answered for me. And all I could ever think of was “He didn’t love me. He didn’t love me. He never did. It was all just me.”
—  cynthia go // Tuesday blues
when i look at you
it feels like coming home after a long trip
when you smile at me
it’s like seeing a strike of lightning illuminate the sky
when you hug me
it feels like everything else just fades away and there is only us

it shouldn’t be a surprise
i have seen into your soul
and your fingerprints are tattooed on my heart
it was only a matter of time
it was always going to be this way
there was no saving me
and i don’t think i want to be saved
all i want is you

i didn’t fall for you
because falling is fast and sudden
falling hurts
but this doesn’t hurt
  these feelings weren’t sudden
i think they’ve always been there
just dormant
because they feel
familiar
natural
right
i can only hope that you feel the same way

(i’m sorry if you don’t
i didn’t mean to like you more than this)
—  on falling in love with your best friend
(cc, 2017)