Cas waits patiently beside the Impala, his hands buried in the pockets of his coat. Dean looks at him with a smile and scrubs a hand over his face. He clears his throat, hanging back at the Impala’s passenger headlight. “Sammy.” He nods, gesturing for Sam to approach.
Licking his lips, he glances at Cas and shifts his weight, holding the keys out to Sam, who, of course, looks at him like he’s lost his mind. “Dean, what…” He looks at Cas, and back to Dean, and Dean recognizes the look of realization as it washes over Sam. “Okay.”
Dean nods, and with his hand settled gently on Cas’s back, he opens the back door to him, sliding in after. As the Impala roars to life, he slides his hand across the seat and covers Cas’s. His throat constricts as Cas turns his hand over, and their fingers lace together. Fuck.
He drops Cas’s hand, who seems startled for a moment before Dean wraps an arm around him and pulls him in. Cas’s rigid demeanor melts away, and his arms slip around Dean’s waist, his head pressed to Dean’s chest. Dean thinks he hears Cas mutter something about a heartbeat. Dean knows his shirt is wet with Cas’s tears.
His fingers bury in Cas’s hair, and he holds him tight against his chest. His own tears spill over, splashing into the angel’s mess of raven locks – like rain drops into a dark, vast ocean.
Dropping his head, he presses a kiss to the crown of Cas’s head, and breathes in deep. Cas smells good. Earthy. Just like he always does. It makes Dean draw a ragged breath. “You’re home,” Dean whispers into his hair, nearly inaudible. It’s only for Cas; only for them. “You’re safe.”
Dean asked for a win, and he can’t imagine a bigger one than this. Than Cas. His Cas, finally safe, finally in his arms.
Sam doesn’t say a word the whole way home. He lets them have their time together. Occasionally, he glances in the mirror and smiles, and looks away when Dean kisses Cas, letting them have their private moments. Dean’s grateful for that, and he’s not sure he’ll ever really be able to thank his brother. For his support, for his grace, for his love even when Dean felt he was unlovable.
For the moment, all is right in Dean Winchester’s world. He has his brother. He has his Cas. He’s alive, and wants to stay that way.
It never ceases to amaze me how Dean thinks he’s Trash King form Garbagetown but he won the heart of a celestial creature who was never supposed to be swayed by feelings
Cas genuinely admires him and cares for his wellbeing and thinks it blatant that Dean deserves nice things and can’t help making him his priority because he loves him so much and he is so. fucking. whipped
And Dean did this to him by doing nothing except being /Dean/ and he’s so, so wrong about being crap
at the very least I think we deserve mary trying to casually ask what the “deal” between dean and cas is and cas, without missing a beat, explains “we have a profound bond” and before dean can spew his gay panic all over the place cas continues “but he doesn’t like for me to mention it” and mary nods with understanding as dean face palms himself and somewhere in the distance you can hear sam cackling
“Do you ever not watch me sleep?” Dean’s voice is sleep-rough and quiet, though barely piercing the dark solitude of his bedroom. He doesn’t even have to open his eyes to feel Cas lying beside him, gaze fixed on Dean’s face.
“No,” Cas whispers, and Dean inhales when he feels fingers trailing his jaw.
“We’ve talked about this.”
“I know. But yet you seem to enjoy it.”
Dean shifts to make himself more comfortable, rolling to face Cas. He finally opens his eyes, letting them adjust to the darkness. When Cas’s face comes into focus, he smiles – sleepy and sated. A smile reserved only for Cas in these quiet moments, away from the chaos of their lives. “I like knowing you’re here with me. Safe. That’s my favorite thing.”
Dean’s hand closes around Cas’s jaw as he shifts forward to press their foreheads together. He breathes in and lets his lips brush Cas’s before he speaks. “You being safe. I can’t think of anything better than that.”
“Dean…. Dean.” A gentle voice pierces the dream-scape, pulling Dean back to consciousness. There’s a hand on his back, guiding him, pulling him in. There’s a body pressed along his side. It’s warm and comforting, and despite being pulled from his precious sleep, he smiles.
“I don’t wanna be awake,” he murmurs, and there’s lips against his shoulder. “I don’t wanna move.”
“Things to do, people to save.” Cas’s voice is quiet and low. There’s a smile in his voice, though Dean can’t see him. Dean pulls Cas’s arm around him and tugs him closer, chest flush against back.
“Not now. Not yet.”
“Dean,” Cas says, a kiss pressed to Dean’s hair.
“It’s not time to go yet, Cas. I can’t. You’re here. I’m not ready.”
Cas’s face is buried against Dean’s neck, and Dean breaths in deep. “I’m always here with you, Dean. Even when you can’t see me. I’m here…”
“Come back to me.” Dean’s words echo in the empty room as he opens his eyes. The warmth he felt from Cas is gone, replaced by cold pillows and a mess of sheets. But no Cas. Never Cas. The air is musty and heavy with the scent of bacon. Sam’s trying to lure him from his room, as he does often these days.
He sits up, grudgingly, and scrubs a hand through his hair. He steels himself for the day ahead – another day without Cas. Another day of going through the motions. Pressing his fingers to his lips, he leans back and presses those fingers to the folded trench coat beneath his pillow. “I mean it, Cas,” he murmurs. “Come back to me.”
As has every day since, he allows himself a moment before he’s up and off, the patented Dean Winchester mask firmly in place. Later tonight, he’ll down a bottle of whiskey, hold the trench coat against his chest and cry himself to sleep. But for now, today, he’s Dean Winchester, the legendary hunter. He pushes forward, like Cas would want. He tries to be the man Cas always believed him to be. A good, heroic, strong man. If nothing else, he can be that for Cas. If nothing else, he can do what it takes to earn the love Cas so willingly gave him.
You don’t have to ship Destiel, but you do have to admit, Dean and Cas’ relationship… it’s different.
The writers, the producers, the directors… they all had a part of this. They easily could have portrayed Dean and Cas’ relationship differently than what they have. They easily could have had Cas have the same exact relationship with Sam as he does with Dean. But he doesn’t. Dean and Cas share a more profound bond. Enough so that an angel, fresh to human emotions and concepts, was able to grasp the fact that his relationship with the older Winchester was different than his relationship with the younger one. It’s always Dean seen alone with Cas. Think about the times you’ve seen the two alone versus the times you’ve seen Cas alone with Sam. And the people working on the show chose to do this. Dean and Cas are the ones they focus on, and they’ve focused on it time and time again. They share their doubts and fears and failures and hopes. They had Cas always come back to DEAN, and vice versa. Dean was the one that argued with Sam and Bobby when they thought Cas was working with Crowley. Dean was the one that fought tooth and nail defending Cas, because there’s no way he could ever believe that Cas could betray him. Dean is the one that held on to Cas’ trench coat after he died, just hoping, praying that his angel would come back to him. Dean spent a year in Purgatory searching for Cas, when he easily could have left with Benny, only to find that the reason Cas fled was to protect HIM. Dean was the one that admitted that the WInchesters needed Cas, only to then emphasize that he specifically needed Cas. Cas was able to break through mind control for DEAN. Even though he had practiced killing duplicates of Dean a million times over, when it came down to the real Dean, he couldn’t do it. Cas chose Dean over an entire army. Cas chose Dean over heaven. Cas chose Dean over everything else, so often that he was even called out for it. Cas admitted that he loved all of the Winchesters, but whose facial expression did the camera focus on? Dean’s. Just like when Cas came back in 13x05, it’s DEAN’S reaction the camera focuses on the moment they make eye contact.
Things are just DIFFERENT between Dean and Cas, even Sam knows it. Sam asks DEAN what they’re going to do with Cas’ body, because he feels like he doesn’t have a say so. He knows that his brother’s relationship with Cas is completely different that his. Sam, without a doubt, loves Cas too, but he knew it was different. It’s the reason why Cas always comes when Dean calls. It’s the reason why Cas threw away everything for the older brother. It’s the reason that Dean throws up Cas whenever Sam can’t focus on losing anyone but their mom. It’s the reason why Dean can’t give Jack a chance.
So if Sam Winchester, the person that knows Dean better than anyone, sees that there’s something DIFFERENT between his brother and Cas, why wouldn’t we?
Spn writers: Okay, I think we made clear that Dean hit rock bottom, right guys? So now, Sam and Dean are in the Impala. Both of them are visible.
Spn writers: Then Cas calls Dean. What a coincidence he calls Dean. Could have been Sam as well.
Spn writers: He could use his catch phrase. Hello Dean. That could work pretty well.
Spn writers: Do you think we have to actually say it?
Spn writers: Nah, they’ll know… But don’t forget the close up on Dean’s face!
Spn writers: Good, Sam and Dean are driving to get Cas. Who is still right beside the phone cell. Weird. As if he had nothing better to do than get back to Dean. Oh and Sam of course! Sam is very important in that reunion which is why we are pointing that out constantly.
Spn writers: When they see each other, we don’t want them to act on in right away. We could let them stare at each other. Don’t think we have done that before.
Spn writers: And some close ups again. Maybe one of Dean, one of Cas, one of Dean, one of Cas, one of Dean, …
Spn writers: Aaaannd The End. Great work guys!
Someone from a dark corner: But what about Sam? Wasn’t he right beside Dean?
Spn writers: …
Spn writers: …
Spn writers: Well, I think Sam importance is already obvious. Besides, Dean and Cas do share a more profound bond.