Warning: This story is fictional, unrealistic and contains a very graphic depiction of child birth. Also bear in mind that this is my first story, so please excuse any errors :)
Summary: A very overdue young couple has an unassisted birth with their first child and things don’t go as they planned….
“I see his head” Brian excitedly announced to his straining wife. He could have danced a jig with excitement that finally the end was finally in sight. Marlie had been labor for multiple days and pushing for 7 hours.
Him and his wife had decided on an unassisted birth early on in her pregnancy, wanting the natural experience. But with their baby boy weighing 10 pounds at their 40 week appointment and it now being 3 weeks later. They both knew this baby was massive and was proving to be very difficult.
“Pressure!!!” Marlie cried in alarm as the baby rammed against her tender skin but Brian was too in shock to answer. Between her thighs, her vulva bulged out further than Brian thought was humanly possible. He knew the baby would be big, but he never imagined it could be this big. He swallowed nervously as it continued to grow, his wife’s petite vulva forming a teardrop.
“Shit its stinging!” Marlie cried as the baby forced the teardrop wider. “His heads starting to show” Brian said trying to sound calm.
“FUCK there’s so much pressure!!” Poor Marlie cried as their son drove hard against her tender skin. The weight of the massive infant unbearable against her femininity. “He feels huge!” She cried in alarm
“You can do this!” Brian encouraged rubbing oil along her opening to hopefully help her stretch easier. The oil seemed to do the trick and on the next contraction, the puffy teardrop snapped into a circle about 1 inch in diameter. “BURNING!!” Marlie cried out her eyes wide in shocked agony
“You’re starting to stretch babe” He said trying to sound like everything was okay. He didn’t have the heart to tell her that she was going to endure much much worse by the end of the day.
Marlie desperately pushed wanting the awful pain to stop and Brian winced as his wife’s delicate skin was stretched around their sons crown. Her poor vulva was inflamed bright fiery red and her naked body trembled on their bed as she fought to birth their massive child.
He pushed her labia open further with his fingers, knowing she needed help stretching and tried to ignore his wife’s cries growing in intensity as the ring of fire grew worse.
Brian was amazed that despite her agony, she was managing to keep pushing, but he knew from the agonized grimace and cries that she was starting to lose control.
She held out for another couple of contractions before the burning got the best of her.
“BURNING BURNING BURRRNNNINGGG!!!” She howled, her body twisting on the bed. Brian grabbed her thighs and kept them open as she involuntarily tried to close them.
“I know it hurts baby. I do. But your doing so well okay” he said rubbing her trembling thigh.
“He’s too big Brian, I can’t do this!” She cried looking at her husband with tears in her eyes.
“He needs to come our babe, c'mon” he tries to coax her
“I can’t fuck I can’t I can’t ooooOOOOOOHHHHH”
She howls as her body takes over and she’s forced to push. Brian breaths a sigh of relief that she is back to pushing, but can’t help but feel horrible as she sobs in agony.
He forced her thighs back, as very slowly his son’s head emerged more and more , his wife’s tender ring mercilessly contorted and stretched around their sons massive skull. But Brian grew nervous as her red tissues started to stretch bloodless white, her poor skin now unable to stretch further.
“Too big !!!! He’s stuck!!” Marlie cried trying to push him out further but her vagina was locked tight around his crown.
“Get him outtttttt!” She cried as Brian tried to come up with a game plan. He ran his fingers along the crown of the baby, now three inches in diameter. She was drawn tight as a bowstring, but there was still so much more that she needed to stretch.
“Lay back and get some rest. Give him some time just to sit there and stretch you out” he instructed rubbing her massive belly.
“It hurts so bad! So fucking bad!’ Marlie cried pitifully. Brian reached up to rub her cheek and placed a cool cloth on her forehead whispering sweet nothings to try and calm her.
20 minutes later, her vagina was still locked tight around the baby’s head and that wasn’t showing any sign of changing. He knew pushing would be fruitless and that in a hospital she would have been given an episiotomy by this point. He racked his brain for an idea and finally decided that it was his best option.
Brian sighed, he didn’t know how to tell his wife the news. He swallowed back his fear and tried to sound calm and professional before speaking.
"Babe, your still stretched tight around his head and we need to get him out. I can’t cut you and you can push him out, so we’re going to need to do something else and you’re not going to like it” he said unable to meet her frightened gaze. “We’re going to try walking and see if gravity can help you” he explained trying to keep her nervous voice even
“What?!! Brian I can’t move! Oh please Brian!” She begged but he knew that their baby needed to come out and knew this was necessary. He tugged her petite naked body off the bed, ignoring her pleas and protest. She fought to sit down and get back to the bed but realized her husband wasn’t going to budge. Her vagina looked and felt like it was going to burst , poor Marlie sobbing at the unbearable pressure and pain as their overdue child was held inside her by only her tender opening. They walked slowly down the hall , Brian’s worry growing as her vulva still refused to budge.
For Marlie, each step was more painful than the last and she couldn’t help but sob and beg her husband to let her stop. Finally Brian gave in and resided to let her squat down and tried to pry her open with his fingers as she pushed, but after 10 minutes and minimal, if any progress, he knew it was time to start walking again.
He stood up and instantly Marlie looked pleadingly at her husband , but he once again hoisted her up. But this time when she screamed it was because her vagina tore. Brian looked at the blood trickling on the floor and sat her back down to investigate.
“OH MY CLIT!!! It hurts OH god it hurrrttttsssss!!” Marlie cried, her vagina burning and throbbing in agony. Brian could see where the break in her perineum had happened but what was more alarming was the head looked to be coming posterior. He knew with the head facing upwards, the baby was shoving agasint her clitoris. He could see the little nub turn blood red under the strain and when he rubbed it, it was hot to the touch. “He’s posterior babe, thats why your clit hurts” he explained
“Can this get any worse” Marlie whimpered but unfortunately it could, they just didn’t know it yet.
For the next hour, they tried every position in the book and did numerous laps around the hallway, but their son wasn’t any closer to being born despite their efforts.
He searched his brain for a solution and finally came up with one. He knew Marlie wouldn’t like it, but looking at the state she was in, he knew his son needed to be born. He continued to drag her down the hallway but instead of stopping at the stairs, he began pulling her down them.
“ Brian, Brian No No No oh pleeassseee NO!” She begged as she was forced to walk down the stairs. The last thing she wanted was more even more pressure against her opening. But what she didn’t know, was that the hardest part, was going up.
They reached the bottom and Brian checked to see if the head had moved and could feel some tension in her skin loosening. “I think it’s working” he said hopeful. Marlie nodded, wanting the agony to end more than anything in the world.
As they took the first step up however, she couldn’t but let out a scream as the baby drove hard against her tortured opening and tore her a little further. She reached down with both hands to stop the baby from coming out, but Brian grabbed them and kept her walking “Come on, I know it hurts, but he’s gotta come out babe” he said as she sobbed.
Each push the baby drove upwards against her clit and tore her open a little further. They reached the top of the stairs and Mandy dropped onto all fours, Brian getting behind her and rubbing her back. “IT HURTS!!!” his wife screamed as the ring of fire grew unbearably worse. “I know, keep pushing baby!” He encouraged seeing more and more of his sons massive head.
“I’m tearing apart!!” She cried as she felt her vagina splitting open in multiple places. Brian gulped and did not know how to help.
“Your doing so good” he encouraged.
He knew that the head wasn’t coming out if she didn’t tear, but seeing his wife’s tender flesh tear open, was making his stomach turn.
“OHH MY CLIT!!” She howled as the baby continued to shove against it and stretch it further. Brian reached up and put his hand over top of it rubbing it slightly to see if it helped her but it didn’t, but kept his hand there not wanting her to tear upwards.
“Keep pushing ” he instructed watching and hoping his head would just come out already. Her ran his free hand around her vagina and an felt an alarming amount still inside her.
“BURNNNINGGGG!!” His wife shrieked as more of their sons head forcefully emerged. “Good girl, he’s coming out” Bria said excited to finally see an end in sight.
“Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!” Marlie howled unable to keep the screams of agony at bay as the baby reached full crown. “Make it stop! Make it stoopppppp! MAKE IT STOP!!” She screamed unable to keep from convulsing as the baby reached full crown.
“Your at full crown babe! He’s almost out!” He exclaimed trying to be heard over his wife’s cries of agony. But just when he thought the head would pop out, it stayed put. Marlie pushed and pushed trying to dislodge the massive skull torturing her vagina, but it was no use. The baby was stuck once again.
Suddenly Marlie turned and laid on her back, yanking her legs as far as they could go. Her whole body trembled with her efforts and Brian rubbed her thighs and kissed her belly to provide some comfort and support. Now that she was on her back and spread eagle, Brian was able to see just how horrific the scene between her thighs was. Her poor vulva was torn in several places and was stretched to a horrific 6 inch width. It looked like an adult head between her thighs and their sons brow had his wife’s clitoris drove upward so far, he could barely recognize what it was.
Another hour went by with the baby still stuck at the brow and Brian finally gave in, grabbing the phone and calling for an ambulance. He waited to be connected but instead got an automated voice message saying that all ambulances are on standby due to massive amounts of snow.
He looked out their window cursing as he saw the amount of snow. But as he heard his wife cry out, he knew it didn’t matter how bad the roads were, she needed to get to the hospital.
He ran upstairs and sat down wiping her sweaty hair from her forehead before telling her the news. “The roads are really bad outside so the ambulances are on standby , but with our truck we should be fine to get to the hospital” he explained leaving out the part , that it would take hours to reach the hospital with the road conditions. He put her in one of his t shirts and wrapped her in a blanket , knowing that clothes weren’t much of an option in her state. Dragging her down the stairs once more and out into their truck and they finally were on their way. Marlie braced her feet on the dashboard , spreading her legs wide open and resorted to trying to blow and meditate the away the pain, but gave up as it proved useless
Time dragged on as they slowly made their way to the hospital, his wife’s poor vagina starting to bruise from the hours of strain. Brian tried rubbing her leg and holding her hand but in the end the only thing his wife wanted was to get their son out and that wasn’t something that was possible. She was no longer screaming, instead she was just sobbing and occasionally would give a frustrated cry after she pushed to no avail.
It took 5 hours till they finally saw the lights to the hospital and both couldn’t help but shed a tear on relief. The pulled up and were met by 2 nurses who instantly blanked at the sight of his wife. “She has been stuck like that for hours, please help us” Brian explained pleadingly.
“Please” Marlie peeped, her tear stained face breaking Brian’s heart. The nurses nodded but told them that they couldn’t get a stretcher out to the parking lot because of the snow. Marlie groaned as she realized that she must walk once more. The blood had left her vagina during the last hour of their drive making her semi numb but as soon as gravity hit, all the blood came back and so did the ring of fire with a vengeance. The nurses and Brian winced as she screamed and cried as she was dragged into the hospital. The reception room gasped as Marlie walked in not knowing what was causing her agony. But when the nurse removed the snow covered blanket and helped her onto a stretcher , everyone was horrified to see the massive baby between her legs and the damage that been done to her vagina.
They wheeled her across the hospital , causing stares and gasps from everyone who saw them. Finally the reached their room and Marlie was placed into stirrups. Brian rubbed her shoulder and tried to keep her calm as they waited for a doctor.
Another hour tricked by and there was still no sign of a doctor. Brian buzzed for a nurse repeatedly and finally got their attention. “We’ve been waiting for a doctor for an hour now, what the hell is taking so long?!?” He growled.
“Most of the doctors couldn’t make it in today due to the storm and since you wife isn’t progressing , it might be a while before he shows up” the nurse said before hurrying off.
His wife started dry sobbing, officially out of tears from the hours of crying as she heard the news and Brian would be lying if he said he wasn’t on the verge of crying either.
Another two hours went by, officially making Marlie stuck crowning for ten hours. At this point she had given up and resolved that their son was never coming out. It felt as though she had been stuck crowning for an entire lifetime and she couldn’t remember what it was like to not be in excruciating pain.
Finally the door of their room opened and the doctor arrived. Brian didn’t know if he wanted hug or kill him but either way help was finally here. Several nurses also piled into the room. Each one went wide eyed and shocked at the sight in front of them. The doctor instantly rushed over and slapped on a pair of fresh gloves, before sitting down between Marlies spread legs.
“Help me!!! Please help me!!” Marlie begged as the doctor ran his fingers along her vagina.
“Sheesh that is one big baby” one of the nurses exclaimed unable to believe that a vagina could stretch that much and that a baby could be that big.
The doctor sighed. The baby was posterior so doing an episiotomy wasn’t going to help much. He laid eyes on the instrument table and finally got a solution
“Marlie, normally I would do an episiotomy but since the baby is posterior, we are going to use a vacuum suction instead.” He explained as the nurse passed him the instrument.
“ JUST GET IT OUT!” She shouted, at the end of rope. “We will” the doctor promised attaching the largest cup he had on hand to the baby’s large head. He began pulling and Brian winced as fresh blood trickled down onto the bed sheet. He rubbed his wife’s shoulder as she shrieked and dry sobbed. Slowly he saw their son’s head get forced out and he looked away as he saw the damage being inflicted. Two of the nurses huddled in the corner of the room, horrified by the scene.
“His head is almost out” Brian exclaimed , but his wife’s was too lost in her agony to her him. The baby remained stuck at the chin for a couple of moments before the head finally emerged. “Oh god oh god oh god” Marlie gasped incoherently. “His heads out” the doctor announced. “Almost done babe” he whispered kissing her forehead.
He watched the doctor wipe the blood off his son’s head and watched the baby’s head turn to face her left thigh. Brian honestly didn’t think his wife had the energy to push his shoulders out, but suddenly she grabbed her knees and bore down harder than he had ever seen her do. He helped push her legs back further and shouted encouragements as their sons wide shoulders tormented her poor vagina even more. Both shoulders strained against her battered opening before they both suddenly erupted out of her and were quickly followed by the rest of the body, the 14 pound baby boy finally born at last.
I have to hand it to Holland. She is so strong. I mean, the fact that she can withstand 6 years of filming 95 percent of her scenes with Dylan without leaving the studio emotionally wrecked is a major accomplishment to me. That’s 6 years of Dylan staring into her soul with nothing but love and affection on his face. 6 years of having Dylan come to her character’s rescue. They’ve kissed- more than once. He’s said he loves her in the most achingly beautiful way. Even their hugs radiate intimate affection. I can’t even handle Dylan and his acting from my TV screen in my room thousands of miles away from anything even remotely Dylan O'brien or Teen Wolf related. Holland is my queen.
- “I’ll see you in a bit. I just got out of practice, gonna head home and shower first. Unless you prefer my au naturale scent.”
- “Gross, can you please shower… I shared a tent with you at camp. I wanted to die.”
Being Bobby’s best friend pretty much mean your apartment is his. Whether it be getting away from the boys, wanting to sleep alone, quiet space for working, or just chilling. Having him over so often wasn’t anything strange anymore. After more than once finding him sitting outside your doors waiting for you to get home from work, you just gave him a key.
- “If you fucking bring girls here, i will end you. Just remember, I know all your dirty secrets.”
- “You act like i’m a diary or something. Do I look like that kind of person to you? smh…”
- “Hey i see you be flirting with girls. desperate time calls for desperate measure. Hanbin would probably kill you if you bang some random girl in your dorm.”
- “Yes, mom. I won’t bring girls over.”
You didn’t start out having a crush on him, not even remote interest. However, as he spend more and more time with you, something changed. His action slowly becoming more sweet and meaningful. Whether it’s just him reminding you to eat, or giving you his jacket during cold days. Slowly his care tug at your heartstring and crushing turn into love. You’ve managed to hidden it well thus far. The frustrating part is you don’t even know if you’re special or this is how he’s usually is with girls. Other than the boys, he never brings you around any of his other friends. He does talks about girls but you never had the pleasure of meeting any of them. There were times where he brought you to parties but he stay by your side the whole time. Being possessive or protective is just something in his nature. He doesn’t let you out of his sight for one second, no guys can come within arm length of you. At this point however, you’d rather not risk a great friendship. Usually you’d come home and find him already lounging around your house. Today was one of those rare day you’re actually home before he comes over. You had some time to spare so you cooked up a meal knowing he’d be starving after practice.
- “Honey, I’m homeeee!!!”
- “STFU will you. How many time did i tell you to stop calling me honey.” you call out from the bedroom.
- “Fine! Did you cook babe? it smells so good.” he walks in the bedroom and jump on your bed.
- “Bobbyyyy NO. stop giving me pet names. if you want your dinner to be safe, stop this instance.”
He has a really bad habit of calling you names that make you dream he was serious about you. He chases you into the kitchen to try and save his meal. You just laugh and follow the crazy boy. After eating pretty much 85% of all the food and chatting your ears off, he slumps onto the couch to watch TV. He insisted on helping you clean up but seeing how tired he was, you shooed him off.
- “I have that new movie you wanted to watch. Are you planning on staying over?”
- “OMG YESH. You’re the best. If you don’t mind, can I? I just spent 18 hours with Hanbin. constant yelling for 18 hours. 18!!! if i see him for another minute i’ll have nightmare.”
- “Haha, you know he means well. Couch or bed?”
Of course he’d choose the bed. He’s a little too comfortable in your home that it seems like it’s really his apartment and you’re the guest. At first he’d offer to sleep on the couch or the floor. Following one particularly hard day at practice, he hurt his back and was dying in pain. You felt so bad and told him to come sleep on the bed. He refused at first but eventually gave in. Ever since then, he doesn’t even ask to share the bed anymore. Even with the close proximity, nothing ever happen except for innocent sleep. There was an actual barrier make out of pillows and blanket between the two of you, always. After putting in the movie, he situates himself flat on his belly, head sideway facing toward the TV.
- “Massage pleaseeeee.” he whines loudly.
- “Are you serious? you take over my apartment, then i have to cook for you, and then clean up. Now you want massage. WTF?”
- “Pretty please, my whole back ache. I told you, i’ve been practicing for like 3 days straight. Please.”
- “Ugh, fine”
Hopping onto his back, legs straddling his sides, you begin to work your magic on him. His broad shoulders relax as his whole body melts onto the bed. Hands running over his smooth skin, fingers grace over the dimples on his shoulders’ muscles, a bit of sadness comes over you. You realize some day this would end time come when either one of you get a love interest. It’s all fun and game to you two but outsider might not fondly share the same view. This day might actually come sooner than you’d wanted. You had decided to give up on loving Bobby.
- “Omg, you should do this professionally. You’re so good babe.”
- “What did i tell you about calling me that?”
You dig your elbow onto his back causing him to yelp out a loud apology.
- “Jeez, you’re so mean. I’m just playing.”
He lays back down and resumes his focus on the movie. You hesitantly speak up.
- “Can I tell you something?”
- “I actually agree to go grab a drink with Jason tonight…”
Still focusing on the movie, it almost feels like he’s ignoring. All of the sudden, he pushes your legs and gesture for you to get off. Thinking he’s mad, you scoot away to give him some room. Before you got too far away though, his arm wraps around your waist and pull you to lay down with him. Relaxing yourself into being his little spoon, you shed a tear knowing this feeling will cease to exist soon. Just like that most of the movie passed with him holding you tight. When there was 30 minutes left to the movie and the clock ticks 9:30, you whisper to him.
- “Hey, I have to get ready to go meet Jason…” you words cut off by a loud sigh.
- “Do you have to leave so soon?” His arms still tight around you.
- “What’s wrong? you’re never this clingy. Did something happen between you and the boys? or at home? Is your family okay?”
- “It’s nothing… i don’t know.”
You get a bad vibe from his behaviors and keep pressing for answer. Could he have heard a gossip about your potential new boyfriend? You did meet the guy through him.
- “No, Jason is a good guy. He’s actually would be a good fit for you…There’s nothing wrong with him.”
- “Then how come i’m getting the feeling that you don’t want me to go. If you don’t want me to go, i won’t go. It’s just a date, i’m not marrying the guy.”
- “Go, have fun on your date. I’ll probably head back to the dorm later…”
You’re now super uneasy at his words and action. He’s telling you to leave but his body is telling you to stay. You pull out of his arm and sit up to look at him.
- “Jiwon… you know i can tell if you’re lying right? what’s wrong?”
- “Nothing… just go”
Did you hear it wrong? Was the TV too loud? His words sounded like they were resisting on coming out of his throat as he chokes them up.
- “Jiwon… come on. Tell me.” You try your best to meet his gaze but he just shift it else where. “Fine, if you won’t say it to my face then just whisper it in my ear.”
You get back into being his tiny spoon and force him to wrap his arms around you once more.
- “I… I just really don’t want you to go…”
- “I can’t do this… uh, shit… I, never mind.”
- “You know what? I can’t do this either… I’m leaving. Stay or go, whatever is fine with me.”
You were wiggling out of his hold when he grabs onto you super tight. One arm wraps around your chest, hand holding your shoulder. The other one snakes around your stomach. He presses his body as close to you as humanly possible and snuggle his face into your hair.
- “I don’t want this to end, us to end.”
- “And what is this exactly? What is ‘us’?”
He practically struck you in the gut by saying that. For months now, for you it wasn’t as simple as best friends hanging out. You guys were practically in a relationship with none of the romance or obligation. You had a crush on Bobby, sure but it wasn’t anything serious. Lately, it’s getting harder for you to differentiate love from friendship.
- “…” Silence fell out of his mouth.
- “You don’t even know what this is, do you?” You were gradually getting frustrated. “Sometimes I wonder why you spend so much time here. You’re not a lonely guy. There’re tons of girls, and guys, that would kill to spend time with you but here you are. Day in, day out, wasting your time in this small average apartment with a completely average girl.”
- “IDK, you’re my best friend outside of the industry. I just want to spend time with you…What’s wrong with that? And you’re not average, stop thinking about yourself like that. Even if you were, what’s wrong with being average. I like you the way you are.”
- “Yes, i know we’re close but you literally spend all your free time here. Your phone blows up every time I see you. Sometimes I just sit and watch you make up bullshit excuses not to hang out with your other friends. I mean you literally was just sitting on my couch, not doing shit. So i really don’t know what this ‘us’ is that you’re referring to. What am I to you? a sister? substitute mom? shelter? What, Bobby.”
- “I.. I don’t know…” he stammers.
That only increases your frustration. All this confusion has to stop. When you’re with him, he has never made a move. The moment you want to see someone else he throws you in for a loop and got jealous? This is too much for your heart to handle so you decided to take your chance. What’s the worse that can happen? If things go south, at least you’ll have peace and can finally move on.
“To me, you’re the greatest person in this world. I had a strings of bad relationships, both romantic and platonic. I was betrayed, cheated on, stabbed in the back. For the longest i thought i was treated badly because i deserve it or that was the best i was gonna get. But you, you changed everything. You showed me how a proper relationship should be and made me better. You’re literally the ultimate best friend. You showed me kindness. You picked me up when i was left wounded by my ex.You showed me a way out. That’s why I will walk through hell for you if you need me to. That’s why i’m your best friend. But fuck, lately it’s been so compilcated. You’re TOO kind to me that it make me soo confuse. You’d draw me into this whirlwind fantasy of thinking i might have a chance with you. You don’t even know how many time I got soo close to confessing to you but then… Then just when I was about to, you gushed hours on end about some girl that wouldn’t give you the time of day, WHILE laying in bed with me. I know these sleepover are purely because you need time away from your hectic life… But shit, it’s so vexing because right after you say craps like “don’t ever date or get marry because i need you”, you go and say friendzone shit to me. I can’t get mad Bobby… I can’t even get jealous when girls that are 10x prettier and more successful than me flirt with you. What right do i have to do that? I’m nothing when it comes to Bobby’s realm of love. That’s why i have to do this, i have to go on this date. I have to end this crazy confusing relationship of ‘us’… whatever ‘us’ is. I can’t keep getting string along like some doll. I don’t want to feel like some left over when you finally move on. I know it’s not your fault, it’s mine for falling for you. But i have to make things clear once and for all. Either you hold up your end of the friendzone bargain or just don’t see me anymore. At the end of the day, I’m nothing more than a comfort net for you and it breaks my heart. So, for the sake of my sanity and my heart… From this day on, i will stop loving you, Kim Jiwon.”
After a few minutes of quietness, you were sure it was done between you and him. His hold still tight, you couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable but there was no way of getting out. Just then, he starts to speak.
- “Please don’t do that… I don’t want you to see him or anyone else. I want you to myself, no other guys in this world can have you. You’re mine and i want to have the right to be selfish when it come to you. You’re wrong. You’re my everything and i prayed so hard that you’d look at me the same way. I can’t stand when you hang out with other guys, guys that would do anything to have you.Guys that can spend everyday with you instead of once in awhile because of some crazy schedule. I can’t help it but stand on the sideline and watch because you seemed so happy. I know I can’t give you all my time so I’d have to let someone else do that. I can’t even tell you how much i love you because i’m scare of losing you altogether. These past couple of months, i’ve been so happy that even the boys noticed. They kept asking me if i have a girlfriend and i love that you’re my secret. I wasn’t trying to string you along, i’m so sorry it came off that way. I was scare if you reject me, i’ll never be able to be in your life like this anymore. You always chase my loneliness away with your laughter and your warmth. One smile and i lose all my strength. I spent nights just watching you sleep, wishing you’d turn around and crawl into my arms. Now and then, I let my heart pretends like you’re my girlfriend… it hurt because you’re mine, but you’re not exclusively mine. I fear the day when you meet someone else and i’d have to let you go. Whenever I’m going to you and someone ask, I want so bad to tell them i’m going home to my girl. I wish i have the courage to tell you that sooner but it’s all too late now… You’re my perfect girl and i lost you because i waited too long.”
At his sweet, shy words, you roll back to face him. He has a painful expression on his face with a few tears stuck in his long eyelashes. Wiping the tears off him, you smile satisfyingly.
- “I won’t go if you tell me not to… I only want to date so I can forget about you. I’ve been hiding my feeling for so long that I thought the only way to escape them was to let you go. I guess we both just fear rejection.”
- “I don’t want you to go. I want you to stay home with me. If only I was more of a man and just come out with my feeling. I guess i’m not that good at hiding it… I’m really sorry for hurting you. It’s just you didn’t even show the slightest sign that you see me as more so I was scared” Hand move to stroke your cheeks softly.
- “It’s okay. You’re my man. Everything is just the way it should now… I love you, baby.” you reluctantly whisper, shy still from his confession.
- “I love you more.” he moves closer and places a kiss on your forehead, hands cupping your face. “As your boyfriend, i forbid you to go on this nonsensical date. You are to stay home and let me hug you. Also, i thought you were allergic to pet name. what happened? ”
You laugh at his sudden boyfriend mode. You always knew he has a cute side but he rarely shows it. All this is so refreshing.
- “You’re an idiot. I didn’t say i don’t like it, I just wanted you to stop calling me by those names. When you call me those things i wish i was more and it hurt that i couldn’t be. So i just yell at you when you do”
- “You are more, sooo much more. Well you’re gonna have to let me call you by whatever name I want now. Although, I think I like being call ‘baby’ more than ‘idiot’.”
- “Baby” you coo at him, cutting off his laugh.
- “I want to kiss you.”
He flashes the biggest smile you’ve ever seen before pulling your chin up and let his lips meet yours. You pull away and smile back at him. His long index reaches over and brushes a few hair strand away from your face.
- “What do you say you call Jason to cancel and we go out to celebrate?”
- “Can we just stay in? I don’t wanna leave your arm.” you whine and he place a haste kiss on your nose.
- “Okay. We’ll stay in for as long as you want if you promise to get rid of the sleep barrier. i don’t need to be cock block from my own girlfriend by a bunch of pillows. I mean, seriously. I couldn’t even “accidentally” cuddle you. I’d know, i tried, it doesn’t work. I hate those pillows so much. You always hug them too, i don’t like that either.”
- “Yes and yes. You’re so cute. I promise i will hug you more than the pillow.”
You giggle at his silliness before digging your face into his chest and letting yourself fall into his scent. He closes his eyes and let the feeling of you against him sinks in. Maybe it isn’t so bad to face your fear once in awhile.