The Time I Pushed a Jerkface off a 35ft Cliff(With Good Reason)
Before we start off let me be clear. I did not murder a man by randomly shoving him off a cliff. Technically, I actually had permission, but still not murder. Chill.
Here we go.
So this is back in Mexico, at the same park as the Sting Ray Incident, just an hour later. Id already recovered from my near death experience and moved on from my friend nearly drowning me. I faced it, i survived, im good and not concerned.
One of the many attractions at this park was the Cliff of Courage. It’s a 35ft cliff that plunges into the water. Now, by my standards, 35ft is low for a cliff jump. Ive done way higher (adrenaline junkie) but obviously i was gonna jump just to say that I did. My parents, grandparents, and Jamie didnt want to jump. No surprise, so they went ahead to meet me on the other side of the river.
So sixteen year old me wanders over and there’s this big group of burly looking men.
They’re all standing at the edge jostling each other around. And just by looking at them you can see they’re american. I dont even need to hear their texan accents to know.
So they’re pulling the whole macho act of “you jump i jump” “ohhh but then you wont jump” bs and just generally being chickens and not willing to show it.
And because of this they wont let anyone else jump. Like ten people came and left because these jerks wouldnt let anyone else go.
Eventually i get annoyed and snap “either jump or get out of my way!”
And the dude who is obviously the leader just turns and grins at me.
He assumed what i call the “douchebag alpha male pose” hands on hips, crotch foreward, you know the one, and you know the body language that goes with it.
He thinks he’s superior. Now this guy is the biggest of them all.
Massive biceps, raging six pack, the works. The Hulk would probaby do a double take at this dudes size.
And little me is not intimidated in the least.
I learned to fight at a very young age, especially men larger than me. I know if things turns south i can take him no problem. A few hits here and there and he’s out for the count.
He starts walking towards me, and i step forward too. He may be alpha male, but he just crossed an Alpha Female who doesnt back down from a challenge.
He looks over at his pals and says,
“Ohhhh, the little lady’s going to jump, is she?” And he just sneers down at me, all arrogance and misplaced confidence.
“Tell you what, sweetheart.” Ohhh he did not just say that. “You jump, we’ll let you push us.”
Three strikes he’s out he just made the biggest mistake of his life.
I just grin and go “ok” and turn and immediately dive over the edge. Im soaring through the air, enjoying the fall. I turn just in time to see his face go from 😏 to 😧
I smack down into the water grinning. Originally the plan was the swim across the river and meet up with my family, but i am cashing in this bet. Except there’s only one way to get back up to that cliff from here
I scale the side of the cliff with the rope and I can hear them chatting nervously up top
I pop up over the edge and prop myself up on the ledge with the sweetest, most steel-lined smile I can manage and say, “who’s next?”
So Alpha laughs and stands at the edge as I haul myself up. He’s laughing and assuring his buddies he’ll be back in a second cause I wont really do it and–
I straight arm him and he goes flying
He flails and plunges over the edge, shrieking in the most high pitched, terrified shriek Ive ever heard a dude bro make. He sputters to the surface and gapes up at me as I grin like a hellion down at him. I turn to the rest of his jerk buddies and smile.
how is maggie sawyer such a good human being??? i mean 1.‘i didnt want to scare you’ - the fact that she never, not once, said anything about her experience because there’s nothing good about it, just pain, and that’s the last thing she wants alex to feel so she hid how she really was outed so alex won’t be afraid to come out and think this is not okay
2.‘this is the biggest thing that’s ever happened to you, and you shouldn’t have to do it alone’ - THIS. NOW READ THIS KNOWING MAGGIE’S ACTUAL EXPERIENCE 3.‘you did? how did she take it?’ - she was just so happy about alex coming out to her mom & being accepted for who she was, even if it reminded her that this is the kind of love and support she never had 4.‘its not for me to say’ - with jonnsaying those words, maggie’s horrible memories of how she never got the chance to come out by herself probably resurfaced 5. maggie sawyer is so tough, protective and caring, but there are wounds that cleary didn’t heal and probaby never will (which is normal when youre kicked out of your own house at 14) but she faced them and despite all the shit she’s been through she’s finally happy with the woman she loves and this is the biggest revenge on life she could’ve asked for
Okay so ya know how the only person Keith will listen to is Lance? Like Lance being Keith’s impulse control? Well Keith’s element is fire right? And Lance’s is water, and water is the only thing that can put out a fire. For example Pidge is the forest, fire can burn down a forest. Shiro is sky/air and fire feeds on oxygen. Hunk is land/earth, fire spreads on land. But Lance is water, which can put out a fire.
A/N: That photo of Shawn waiting in the check out line inspired this. Late night grocery store shopping + running into each other.
Wow, I’m on a roll with fluff. Let’s see how long I keep this up.
Feedback appreciated. Enjoy.
You don’t know what possessed your roommate to drag you out of the comfort of your warm bed to go grocery shopping, yet there you are. The bright neon sign glares at you as you park and you can’t help but turn your head to do the same.
“Sonya, tell me again why we’re here at…11 o’clock at night?” You pull your phone out to check the time. Whatever she needed could wait until the morning.
“We literally have nothing for breakfast,” Sonya retorts. “We’re also out of toilet paper,” she confesses. You groan in annoyance, letting your head fall back onto the headrest.
“Alright, alright. I guess that couldn’t wait.” You can’t say you’re surprised, though. Both of you have been busy with school and work, so it’s simple to overlook necessities like food and toilet paper.
Sonya hustles towards the carts to wrangle one. You can barely keep your eyes open until you step into the store and the the harsh florescent lights invade your vision.
ive seen stuff about actors being booed at curtain calls (especially the deh understudies) and i just wanna say that it is never okay to boo actors during their bows! more often than not, they have tried unbelievably hard during their performances and the last thing they want is to be jeered at for doing what the audience thinks was a sub-par job! even if you didn’t particularly like their character, or their acting, or their voice, still be respectful. you do not have to cheer and scream and jump for joy when they come bow, but please, just have some basic decency.
(the only exclusion to this rule is for the villians of the story: booing is sometimes common there just as a general condemning of their character’s moral behavior, but still, please be respectful of the actors that have worked hard to put on a show for you)