private novel

The only thing Bloodlines disproved was the headcanon that Rey was left on Jakku after the Jedi massacre. What we do know is that Leia didn’t discuss Luke’s mysterious private life in a novel where the author was given no information that would be relevant to prove Rey’s parentage.

Private Eyes (closed)

bupagentkent //

     Oh boy, a dossier. A very thick dossier. Inside, Kent’s newest mission was detailed. He was to investigate a place called Freddy’s Family Pizzeria, apparently a spiritual successor to the older chain of Freddy Fazbear’s Pizza restaurants from years ago.

     The original chain had had a… colorful past, to put it lightly. The very first restaurant, a family-owned establishment called Fredbear’s Family Diner, saw the murder of a small number of children before being bought up by the now defunct Fazbear Entertainment. Fredbear’s was renamed, rebranded, and repackaged. 

     The very next location saw several unfortunate (and lethal) accidents within two prototype costume-animatronic hybrid characters. The spring-loaded mechanisms inside were very sensitive, and apparently even breathing on them could cause them to undo themselves. A clipping of old company policy attached to this portion of the dossier says that employees caught in this situation should ‘move to the designated safe room before bleeding out to avoid scaring the customers’. Wonderful.

     Those costumes were scrapped very quickly, apparently being sealed in the unmonitored safe room before the company moved to a new location with a very small budget, only able to refurbish four of their animatronics for the occasion. This location was open throughout the 80s and late 90s, ran on limited generator power at night, and had huge safety doors enclosing the Office area on either side. That location saw the disappearance (and likely murder) of five total children in 1983, as well as an animatronic apparently going haywire in 1987 and biting a man who later turned out to be a registered and escaped child abductor. The man reportedly survived the ordeal.

     After that, the darkness of the chain faded into obscurity as the building fell to new management and the company allocated all of their resources to the latest rebranding in a last-ditch effort to salvage the business. Not but two days after opening, the new place had to close temporarily due to technical complications with the animatronics. Interviews conducted with the manager state that the animatronics attacked each other after closing time, and it was best for them to close to maintain them and avoid any possible accidents with customers.

     During the time they were closed, the company itself fell. The new owner bought the restaurant from them at a steep discount and set about remodeling it. According to her, the design of the place they gave them to use was 'impractical at best and ridiculous at worst,’ and the place was in sore need of redesigning despite not even being a week old at the time of its closing. 

     Kent was now heading to this new place to investigate these animatronic characters and their location. It was later in the evening, and the Agent was supposed to be meeting with the manager, one Lyle Yamatsu, to get settled in. He would be spending the night shift with an employee named Michael Schmidt, as there had been a break-in the previous evening and the current night watch was sent home to rest for a few days. Reportedly, the animatronics also exhibited some level of sentience, though the singular report on that came from a questionable source.

     Pulling up to the building finally, Kent could see it was large for sure. It also appeared very new and well-maintained, not like the dingy, dirty messes that the previous locations were reported to have been. Standing outside cleaning raw egg off of the outer wall from the rambunctious neighborhood kids was a shorter man with jet-black hair. The back of his white shirt displayed the new logo of the place.

     The man looked over his shoulder as he heard Kent’s car approaching and waved in greeting, quickly finishing the cleaning work and attaching the cleaning supplies to his belt before stepping down to greet him once he exited his car.

     "Ah! Welcome to Freddy’s Family Pizzeria. Agent Mansley, I presume? I’m Lyle Yamatsu, the manager. Just cleaning up for the evening… neighborhood teenagers think it’s funny to ride by and throw eggs to see how high they have to make the short man climb to clean them.“ He sighed. Evidently, this has happened at least once before. "Don’t worry… I’m not going to ask you to shake hands since I’ve just been cleaning up that mess. Any questions you might have before we go inside?”


top: from my review in Bookforum of Tony Tulathimutte’s novel, Private Citizens (Bookforum out now, novel soon)
bottom: from this Patricia Highsmith bio I love (happy birthday, Patricia)