Caring for your ENFP
Ask lots of questions.
Because of the auxiliary Introverted Feeling function, ENFPs often have a difficult time expressing deeper emotions. Many times this is due to not wanting to burden others with their problems or feeling as though they should be able to work through things themselves. This tends to create great internal conflict between the need to communicate (in order to process) and the need to guard (in order to avoid conflict.)
ENFPs use their dominant function, Extraverted Intuition to brainstorm and process information, because of this, they often use speaking aloud as a way to formulate new ideas about what they are dealing with. This is a coping mechanism that helps to work through anxiety, worry, doubt and insecurity.
If you have an ENFP in your life that seems withdrawn, sullen or struggling to get something off their chest a great way to help them “deal” is to ask probing questions.
Create time and space to listen to your ENFP, asking questions to help them get to the bottom of the situation, and remember that body language is just as important an indicator of engagement as verbal language. Your ENFP will not open up to you if they feel the conversation is not welcome.
These are deep personal feelings we are talking about here… not the fucking weather.
Unexpressed emotions lead to unresolved emotions (fears, doubts, worries, insecurities, etc…) which can lead to long-term inability to communicate, resentment, and a host of other toxic elements within their personal relationships.
It is important to remember that ENFPs want, more than anything, for our fears to be dispelled and our anxieties to be proven wrong, so we are ALWAYS open to new ways of looking at a situation. Often, ENFPs with a well-developed tertiary Extraverted Thinking function can work through tough issues rather quickly with the help of an interested friend.
If you find yourself at a loss with your ENFP, if they seem as though they are all over the place and you can’t seem to figure our what the fuck their problem is… it’s because you haven’t asked.