Whatever it is, stop trying to figure it out now. Let it remain unresolved a little while. Stop trying to fast-forward to the ‘answer’ scene in the movie of your life; trust the present scene of ‘no answer yet’. Allow the question itself space to breathe and be fertilized. Relax into the mysterious ground of Now.
You are now at a crossroads. This is your opportunity to make the most important decision you will ever make. Forget your past. Who are you now? Who have you decided you really are now? Don’t think about who you have been. Who are you now? Who have you decided to become? Make this decision consciously. Make it carefully. Make it powerfully.
This is a very important practice. Live your daily life in a way that you never lose yourself. When you are carried away with your worries, fears, cravings, anger, and desire, you run away from yourself and you lose yourself. The practice is always to go back to oneself.
There is a fine balance between honouring the past and losing yourself in it. For example, you can acknowledge and learn from mistakes you made, and then move on and refocus on the now. It is called forgiving yourself.
The past has no power over us. It doesn’t matter how long we have had a negative pattern. The point of power is in the present moment. What a wonderful thing to realize! We can begin to be free in this moment!
Mindfulness is the aware, balanced acceptance of the present experience. It isn’t more complicated than that. It is opening to or the present moment, pleasant or unpleasant, just as it is, without either clinging to it or rejecting it.