pregnant scootaloo

Presenting: THE DASHIES!

The 20% cooler family!

Follow Rainbow Dash, Soarin and Scootaloo in this new part of their lives as a family!

Many years have passed since Rainbow and her friends achieved a new era of peace and friendship in Equestria. But now she must deal with the fact of forming a family of her own and Scoots must find her place in this one. What new challenges must the family of flyers face? Will Scootaloo follow Rainbow steps? or decide to create her own destiny?


Issue 1# cover!

A letter from Scootaloo

To my precious Lightning Blitz,

I suppose writing a letter now is kinda stupid.  But I wanted to do something to let you know what things were like and how they got this way.  If you’re reading this and I’m no longer around then know no matter where I am that I’m sorry.

“I’ve never truly lost anything before."  Those were some of the last words I ever heard my mother say before she died.  That she sometimes made it to second or third but never truly lost.  She lamented that she’d never see many of the milestones in my life.  That she wouldn’t be there for me when I’d need her to be.  The only thing she assured to me though was that she never stopped fighting to win.  Not once.  Then she lost the fight that mattered most right in front of me.  That’s probably where things really began for me.

I was an orphan then.  With my mother gone there wasn’t anyone left in my family that could take me in.  I was dumped onto my mother’s best friend, Sandy, who was pressured into a promise as she watched somepony dying before her.  How could she have possibly refused in a situation like that?  Sandy didn’t have children of her own.  I don’t know if she ever had any special somepony in her life.  But now she had me and I had her and we resented each other so much for it. 

I can’t call Sandy a bad pony though.  She fed me and took care of me and let me stay in her home despite never wanting me.  I was put up for adoption pretty shortly after Sandy took me in.  But no one ever really wanted me.  I’d already gained a reputation as a trouble maker.  I’d get in fights, cause messes, break things and just lash out at pretty much anything I could.  I’d blame Sandy for why I was so mad but the truth wasn’t that I hated her.  I just hated my life and Sandy was the face of it.  So she had to deal with all the disappointment.  She eventually lost her business too and after that things just went from bad to worse. 

Without a stable income Sandy had to work two jobs just to support us both.  We didn’t see each other often and when we did it was usually over something I’d done wrong.  She’d lecture me and yell at me and sometimes even beg me to behave.  I didn’t though.  I knew if I was good and kept my head down that eventually I’d just… fade away I guess.  It was better to be despised than forgotten. 

It wasn’t always bad though.  I had friends back home; Applebloom and Sweetie Belle.  We called ourselves the Cutie Mark Crusaders and went on daily adventures to try and figure out what our special talents were.  We all became friends after we realized none of us had cutie marks yet and so it was our quest to find them together.  Those were probably the happiest times I can think of.  It wasn’t about being good or bad or winning or losing.  It was all about the adventure.  Just being alive and smiling.  Some days I was even able to take that good mood home with me and tried to be nice to Sandy.  Those would be good days. 

Being a blank flank though was kind of like being a loser in of itself.  The other fillies and colts with cutie marks would tease us for not getting ours yet.  Without a mark you were a nobody.  Which now that I think about it since there wont be any crusades anymore what would my mark have even been?  All I ever did when I wasn’t in school or getting in trouble was ride my scooter.  That’s not a talent.  Not a worthwhile one anyway.  Just Scootaloo and her scooter, riding around and doing nothing for the rest of her life. 

Or that would have been the case.  You see I met a boy that changed everything.  His name was Rain Catcher; he was a sports star in school and older than me.  He told me that I was pretty and that he liked spending time with me.  There were even a few times I thought he might have been telling the truth… no that’s a lie.  It wasn’t really the truth at all.  Rain Catcher just wanted me for one thing and one thing only.  He got what he wanted too and… it was… it wasn’t special.  I’d heard before that it was supposed to be special but even this wasn’t special.  It was rough and painful and it didn’t feel right at all but I let him.  Because I needed to be loved so much by somepony, anypony.  I enjoyed what I could because he told me Rainbow Dash would have done it too.

I forgot to mention Rainbow Dash.  She’s sort of my hero.  I wanted to be just like her when I got older; she was brave and cool and strong and she’s even one of the Elements of Harmony.  They’re like really important magical people that work for the Princess.  I used to imitate everything I could to be just like her and this time it… got me into trouble.  Not that Rain Catcher was telling the truth.  She doesn’t even like colts. 

I got myself pregnant, but you know that part already right?  Sandy was so furious with me when she found out.  I didn’t really understand what was going to happen so she took me to a doctor and had him explain everything.  It was pretty… disappointing I guess.  Not that I didn’t want a baby.  But I knew then that my life wasn’t ever going to be anything even close to what I hoped.  I wouldn’t be able to do all the things I wanted anymore, I couldn’t participate in all the activities with my friends.  I couldn’t even get around without someone making sure I was okay all the time.  I was an even bigger problem than I was before.  But you never were.

My little Lightning Blitz.  I need you to know that you’re the only good thing in my life.  I need you to remember that, remember me.  If nothing else never ever forget that your mommy loves you.  Even if your daddy never cared about me or my friends don’t need me or if Sandy is better off without us around just know I love you!  I’ll always love you because you’re my little foal no matter who says their your mother. 

Also know I’m sorry for whatever happens to us.  I thought that Sandy… I thought she cared a little bit at least.  But she tried to get rid of you as soon as she could and I couldn’t take it anymore.  I knew then that I wasn’t ever going to win.  I’m not like my mother because I’ve never truly won at anything before.  My whole life has been a joke.  My parents left me, my friends abandoned me, Sandy doesn’t care about me, Rainbow Dash doesn’t need me.  I can’t even fly with these useless wings of mine and I don’t think I’ll ever get my cutie mark now.  Nothing matters anymore except you Lightning Blitz. 

I wont be able to run forever.  I stole you so that we could see each other, so I could talk to you.  You probably can’t understand me; you’re just a foal.  But I hope you’ll remember your mommy and know that even if she never won anything in her life that she never stopped fighting.  She never stopped fighting for you.  I’ll make sure I do that much for your grandma. 

If we say good bye now I think it’ll be forever.  But I’ll keep fighting to keep that day as far away as I can.  Your mother loves you Lightning Blitz.  Remember that and remember this; don’t be like me.  I only hope this letter finds its way to you. With Love,

Your mother Scootaloo

Took me over three months to finally get around to finishing this request from Deviantart, which is pretty inexcusable. It’s particularly embarrassing considering Scoots has already had the baby in the pregnant-scootaloo storyline.

I will definitely not be taking another request unless it’s a simple 30-minute-challenge style kinda request or something I know I can get done in an hour or so. I put myself under way too much stress for no good reason at all, and making someone wait that long for something I said I’d do is a pretty douchebag thing to do.

Mod: I should be working on an update. I have Wordpad open right in front of me. Do I do work? Nope. Well, while I wait for my brain to actually kick into gear, I thought I’d post this up. No real surprises either. 

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http://ask-mini-pinkie.tumblr.com/

http://pregnantscootaloo.tumblr.com/

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http://asksweetjasmine.tumblr.com/

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My problems with the story, if you want someone to 'argue' with.

I can understand your frustration regarding some of the complaints towards your story. Unfortunately there are always ponies who will be particularly rude to you about these things. There always will be, no matter what you do. But don’t let those idiots blind you to true criticism, and do not mistake negativity for assholery. (That’s a word, right?)

The reason that some ponies, myself included, are unsettled by the climax to your story is because we became emotionally invested in the tale you were weaving. If you’ll allow me to hopefully civilly explain my issues with it, hopefully I can clearly communicate why others might be frustrated with it. In other words, allow me to be the one you want to argue with.

Here is my issues:

Poor Grasp on Adoption:

Essentially, your version of Equestria apparently has some incredibly terrible rules on adoption. In pretty much all developed countries on our world, adoption is heavily slanted towards the birth mother, particularly independent adoptions. For the adopted parents, it’s a weeks long process, full of lawyers, inspections from independent auditors, and paperwork. And even after all that, most places, even after they’ve taken the child from the birth mother, the birth mother (or her guardian) can have anywhere between a couple of days, to a month or two. The fact that those two came in at almost literally the last minute, and acted how they did, and it was suggested that they might in fact get Blitz felt…forced, and unrealistic.

Deprotagonization of Scootaloo:

This is what ponies really mean when they say “Discorded Hooves took over the blog.” To try and explain my point, I’m going use an example.

Remember Raiders of the Lost Ark, the scene where the Nazis have the Ark of the Covenant and are getting away in the convoy, and Indiana Jones uses his wits, cunning, and fists to completely dismantle the convoy pretty much all by himself? Wouldn’t that scene be better if he, Marion, and Sallah were suddenly transported onto the Starship Enterprise, who proceed to use their phasers to completely decimate the Nazi convoy? And Captain Kirk and crew proceeded to take over the rest of the film?

No, of course it wouldn’t. That’s what happened here. The main conflict of Pregnant Scootaloo always was how Scootaloo is going to deal with the child when it comes, the prospect of losing him, and her feeling powerless in her own life, because of what has happened in the past. So, when it comes time to face the climax…she’s nowhere to be found. She doesn’t get to make sure Lightning Blitz gets a new life. Her actions are proven to be, yes, futile and she is powerless. Then she just essentially disappears from the story as the climax enters it’s highest point. Instead, a magic man that had no foreshadowing (or very little), suddenly waltzes in and solves the main conflict in the story. The story is no longer about her, it’s about Discorded Whooves. He’s the protagonist now, and that rankles. Especially if you’re like me, and I had no idea who he was when he suddenly popped up.

Wait…this is supposed to be a better home?:

So, basically, Lightning Blitz’s new mother is a Twilight who has attempted suicide twice, once recently, and has shown no signs of emotional recovery from them. She does not have any support, save for Discorded Whooves, who is unreliable at best. She is incredibly emotional fragile, and breaks down when any sort of emotional stress is put upon her. This is because she lives in a world where Cupcakes happened but worse-both Rainbow Dash AND Fluttershy got killed and eaten by Pinkie, and Pinkie was executed by Celestia through decapitation. Rarity of that world is a version of ‘Little Miss Rarity’. AJ has become an alcoholic depressive. Ponyville has a crime rate so high that a special taskforce (lead by that version of the Warden) has been sent to stymie it. This has not stopped a serial killer from murdering five unicorns, including Vinyl and Lyra. Twilight sent Spike away to Canterlot to keep him safe. Oh, and apparently Discord has escaped again. And with half the elements of harmony dead. And this is supposed to be better for him? We’re supposed to take the word of somepony who literally Sandy just met a few hours ago and has no reason to trust with the child?

Those are the main issues I have with the story. Though I have a couple of issues I’d like to bring up: There are plenty of single parents on our world who have to work 40+ hours and yet take good care of their children. Hell, most parents in general now both have to work full time, and yet manage to take care of their kids. There are teenage parents who manage to take care of their children, and indeed manage to learn and grow out of being impulsive and irresponsible because of it.

Finally, something being 'free’ does not mean one cannot critique it, or find fault with it. After all, most television is 'free’, especially if you aren’t watching the commercials. If you take a book out of the library, it’s 'free’. Plus, there’s more things people pay when becoming involved with a story than just money. There’s time, and emotional investment.

Well, that’s my piece on the matter. I want to say, though, that the reason why I was disappointed is because I cared about the story, and that, at least, should look good on you. Don’t let the jerks get you down, but don’t let them blind you. Learn and grow.

-EsperDerek

No no, I don’t mean to sound like I don’t understand legitimate criticisms when I see them, cause I do. It’s just if you can’t present it in a way that sounds demeening then I can’t take it all that seriously, especially if all your 'points’ don’t make sense to me. That’s now what happened with your post though, everything was clear and concise and wasn’t brimming with negativity, but respect for the original material and the plot-points you disliked about the story. 

I think you misunderstand the idea of an 'argument’ as well. An argument usually involves that negativity in which two sides have a different point of view and will use negativity to try and force their opinion on the other and neither side usually concedes. Here you’ve plainly laid out your points calmly and clearly and with respect. This won’t be an argument, this’ll be a debate if anything.

With that said I’ve read everything you’ve had issues with and I’ll give you what was going through my head at the time, and why I at least thought it was a good idea.

Poor Grasp on Adoption

This one… I’ll give you. You’re completely right in the idea that I don’t really have a good grasp on adoption. Honestly I was playing this part of the storyline up for the theatrics. I have some really good storylines planned that involve the fact Jet Set and Upper Crust are still fighting to keep the baby and I needed them to have some legal grounds to be able to. 

The whole situation was originally baseless, until I met a friend who told me they basically went through something similar. That they were put up for adoption and someone had already accepted the offer to adopt the baby, but when their birth mother held them, the mother refused to give up her baby. So the adoptors had to fight in court for 2 months before the birth mother won custody of her baby. Once I heard that I felt a little more confident in my story.

But that doesn’t excuse the poor lack of knowledge on the whole thing, and for that I apologize.

Deprotagonization of Scootaloo

This one I do understand, but I feel a slight point was missed. While yes, the story focused on Scootaloo, at the time of the birthing the story switched less from her but to Sandy. For most of the Birthing, Scootaloo was incapacitated. Either recovering in the hospital or running away hurt in the forest or just unconscious as she recovered from her wounds. And even if she had come to, there was only so much she could have done to help Lightning Blitz get a new home, that decisions ultimately rested upon Sandy’s shoulders.

Sandy is an important character to Pregnant Scootaloo, I’d dare say if there was a 'second main character’ it would be Sandy. So the story shifted to Sandy’s plight of ensuring Lightning Blitz was safe and protected, ensuring that Lightning went to a safe home, ensuring Sandy’s characterization went through the final push into where it went that it did.

The storyline focused on Sandy and Lightning Blitz and temporarily made them the protagonists, because the entire time they were the protagonists Scootaloo was out of commission, a body laying somewhere.

The main character didn’t become the Doctor, at most he had two updates that focused on ONLY him doing something. If you re-read them, you’ll see that either Sandy was the primary focus of the update or it was Lightning Blitz. And in the end, a crossover is supposed to have something important happen for both of the blogs without really needing to read the other for it.

Perhaps I did poorly foreshadow his arrival, and for that I do apologize. I could have brought his arrival in better, and is something I plan to fix in future updates of the story. I do learn from the things people say are flawed in my storytelling and this is one of the things I’ll do my best to fix later.

Wait…this is supposed to be a better home?

To be fair, we have to look at this from the character’s point of view, namely from Sandy’s. Sandy was taken to the home of a Twilight Sparkle, a well known and renowned member of the community who has saved the world with her friend numerous times (especially since this takes place a few years after canon). Scootaloo idolizes Rainbow Dash, a close friend of Twilight and someone Sandy would trust to watch over Scootaloo, so the same would be said of Twilight. The Doctor wasn’t the one who said he was adopting the child, it was Twilight who is. Sandy would trust Twilight to take good care of the baby.

On top of that, the only thing she knows about the world is that there are murders happening. She doesn’t know that Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie are dead (and I would like to correct one small thing here, Fluttershy hung herself in the Everfree Forest, she wasn’t eaten by Pinkie. But so much happens there I can understand how you missed that heh), or that Applejack is a drunk, or that Discord is apparently free again. All she knows is that there are muders going on.

So Murders are going on and Twilight is worried about them, but the man who has a time machine, saved Scootaloo’s life, promsied Lightning Blitz a good home, and seems passionate about protecting the person he loves the most and the baby, promised he would move the entire planet just to protect them, seems to me like plenty of reason to give the guy at least a little trust. He ALSO gave Sandy a way to visit Twilight and Lightning Blitz anytime that she wants. She has free access to visit the home as often as she wants to see how Lightning Blitz and Twilight are doing, sometimes to the point of being unexpected. If she sees something she doesn’t agree with, she’s going to get Lightning Blitz back, come hell or high water.

Also, it’s likely that Spike will be coming back from Canterlot now that Twilight can feel assured that he’ll be protected from the murderer (as well as other reasons I can’t divulge at the moment due to spoilers in Discord Whooves). This certainly doesn’t seem to stop the other problems from going on, but I can assure that something is being doing to stop Discord from wreaking havoc on the world (Namely that something being The Master), and though the Elements of Harmony have broken down, primarily Ponyville and Equestria have someone looking after its well being (namely Minuette, who is also a timelord). So yeah… Twilight’s Ponyville is pretty protected, and there’s a very good reason why the murderer is going after Unicorns and hasn’t just outright been stopped yet (Also spoilers I can’t divulge).

As for the whole 'It’s for free’ argument, again that wasn’t directed at people like you who have legitimate criticisms about my storyline. I fully accept these and I DO learn these. My brain has already starting thinking up how to tell better stories for the future of the blog instead of the same kind of lacking storylines that the Birthing came up with. It was directed at the people who were being pricks about how I did it, whose criticisms felt unwarranted and like they just wanted to personally attack me for my storyline instead of enjoying it.

I’m sorry I disappointed you in the end, I am. I know I could’ve told the story at least a little better, but in some aspects I did rush, in others I didn’t. I just told the best storyline I could at the time while having everything I wanted in it. I got you invested in the first place after all, perhaps I can get you invested again with what I have planned.

Thank you for being a fan and thank you for caring about my storyline. That on it’s own means more than I could really say. I hope I can present better stories for the future ^_^

My thoughts on the most recent developments in Pregnant Scootaloo.

I found the update where Scootaloo gives birth to be very underwhelming. Why? I think that you could have and should have shown more, and I’m not talking about Lightning Blitz coming out of Scootaloo’s vagina. You could’ve had a scene where Sandy, Jet Set, and Upper Crust ran into Scootaloo’s room to find that her water had broken; you could’ve shown everyone frantically rushing to the hospital; and you could’ve shown all of Scootaloo’s friends in the waiting room; I also think that Scootaloo should’ve had the baby naturally, and that the delivery should’ve lasted longer. Scootaloo could’ve even almost died. Now why is all this important to me? Well, think of it this way: everything in the blog including the blog itself has been leading up to this since Pregnant Scootaloo’s conception. It’s literally the only reason for the story’s existence, and it came out of nowhere and it was over with just as quickly. Where was the drama? Where was the suspense? Now maybe you felt that such drama would have added nothing to the drama between or within the characters or advanced the overall plot and was therefore pointless. Maybe you felt that multiple updates devoted solely to Scootaloo being in labor would be boring and unnecessary. Or maybe you didn’t have a reason. I would counter that stretching this out would’ve made it a fun ride for the audience. You could have really sucked us into this emotionally and had us on the edge of our seats. If there was ever a time when you should have milked Pregnant Scootaloo, this was it. When I saw Scootaloo’s baby for the first time, I barely felt anything at all because you just breezed through the entire thing. This event deserved more than to be condensed and abridged into 1 update that didn’t show much or last long, and frankly, I don’t think that Scootaloo suffered enough. Drawing out her labor and having Scootaloo be in more agony would’ve made it so much more rewarding when both she and I finally got to see Lightning Blitz for the first time.


I would also like to take this time to complain about Dr. Whooves’ role in the story. Now unlike some people, I never felt that the doctor’s appearance “came out of nowhere” or “was too convenient”. You’ve shown on more than one occasion that the Pregnant Scootaloo universe is canon to the Discorded Whooves universe, so even though it surprised me, it felt plausible. My problem is with what Dr. Whoove’s did after saving Scootaloo and Lightning Blitz. He shows up out of nowhere and just happens to know the perfect foster home to take in Lightning Blitz so that he doesn’t get adopted by Jet Set and Upper Crust. Now this too is plausible, but it’s also way too convenient; he is literally just giving Sandy the answer to her problem and it requires absolutely no work on Sandy’s part. Having a character just show up an give the main character the answer to their dilemma is the worst kind of resolution. Also, I can handle Dr. Whooves being in the right place at the right time to find Scootaloo and Lightning Blitz, but having Dr. Whooves be in the right place at the right time to find Scootaloo and Lightning Blitz and also have the ideal foster home is too much. It’s too many happy coincidences too close together, and as if that weren’t bad enough, they’re both because of the same person. Is what I thought until a day ago. I see now that it isn’t going to be that simple. It seems like maybe they’re going to have to actually work to put Lightning Blitz into a new home, just as Sandy had to actually work to get that job with fewer hours and double the pay. Miss Twilight Sparkle might not even work out, which would bring them back to square one. I’ve been holding out hope that you had something else planned, that it couldn’t be that easy, that you were a better writer than that, and it looks like you aren’t going to disappoint me.


PS - Did anyone else think that Scootaloo was actually going to die in those woods and her corpse would have a cutie mark on it?