preferably when i come hide out at your place this summer

tips for new uni / college students

i’m just finishing up my first year this summer and i know lots of people are graduating and going into post secondary this semester, so here are my tips on your first year! (im in canada but these should probably be relevant for other countries? i think!) feel free to add your own! (spaces are for accessibility – sorry for the long ass post) 

  • you don’t need to ask to go to the bathroom, or to leave at all. if you’re anxious, or if you need a coffee, just quietly leave without disturbing the other students and come back when you’re ready. try not to leave in an important part of the lecture—you should preferably be doing everything you need to before/after class to avoid leaving and missing information, but this isn’t high school anymore and you can come and go as you wish. (note: if youre working in a lab make sure you follow your prof’s safety procedures around leaving to avoid bringing contaminants out of the lab with you, and do NOT leave in the middle of a test unless given explicit permission by the prof.)
  • i bought a binder for my first year and never used it. i took all my notes in a coil notebook, which is easier to keep track of, and put all handouts in the inside pocket/in a folder which was more than sufficient, since at my school most of the handouts are online anyways. if you’re more comfortable using a binder, definitely use one, but you’re probably better off using a notebook. 
  • you can bring your laptop/tablet to class to write your notes in 99% of classes. if you find typing easier than writing on paper with pen/pencil, then bring it with you - just make sure you have your charger/your laptop is charged, especially if it’s a long class. but try not to get distracted — you’re probably better off sticking to a notebook if you know you’re going to open facebook/tumblr instead of actually taking notes.
  • most professors i’ve taken still don’t appreciate texting in class. some of them don’t care, some will call you out on it. they understand if you have to quickly reply to your mom or something (or take a phone call outside of class) but if every time they look up you’re blatantly staring at your phone (or your crotch lol we all know the trying to hide ur phone under ur desk phone) they’ll probably be less inclined to help you later when you ask questions because you were too busy not paying attention 
  • write your name, phone number and school e-mail in the front of your notebook / on a label on your laptop. losing an entire semester’s worth of notes would be a NIGHTMARE and you want to make it as easy as possible for anyone who finds your stuff to return it to you. 
  • before you buy your textbook from your bookstore, check facebook to see if your school has a book exchange page and try to find someone you can buy it from second hand. it will be cheaper. 
  • if you can, buy your books used from the bookstore. renting is cheaper than buying — the buy back price at the end of the semester will be drastically reduced from what your purchased it at.
  • get familiar with the services at your school. check out the pride center and women’s center if you have one, join a club, and find a community. you’ll have a lot more fun at university if you find your niche and people who share your interests. they don’t have to be your lifetime best friends, but it’s nice to have a place to go and chat with an acquaintance during long breaks between classes.
  • use google docs or a similar cloud-based service. not having to haul your essays around on a USB is so much more convenient, and with your work stored in the cloud you won’t have any risk of it not saving or being corrupted. 
  • plagiarism is such a big no. your profs will remind you, but if you think you can get away with it, you can. plagiarism gives you what is essentially an academic criminal record and NO ONE in your faculty wants to deal with it, so just do your work okay?? trust me the consequences are way worse than just sitting down and writing the paper, no matter how awful it is
  • on the first day, if you HATE a class or the prof, drop it. add/drop deadlines are serious business 
  • if you have a few different choices for which prof to pick, check ratemyprofessor before choosing (but remember to take things with a grain of salt – they are reviews written by real people)

post-secondary is an amazing opportunity and as much as student loans and the emotional stress are hard, it can also be an incredible and fascinating experience. don’t worry too much about “finding your purpose” and take advantage of the wealth of knowledge your professors and teachers will present to you. good luck to all of you and i hope you have a wonderful time!! 

When We Collide (Part 7)

Pairing: Assistant!Y/N/CEO!Luke

Rating: NC-17

Parts: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

Summary: He is the definition of high class smart ass, swimming in Dom Pierre Pérignon champagne and has never seen the shadow of poverty. She is underprivileged, lives in a messy dorm room on sale and struggles working as an assistant after being thrown out of college. But how will they collide when Luke makes Y/N pregnant after a drunkenly one night stand?

When We Collide on Wattpad

A shaky breath escaped from your lips so loudly and deep it echoed in the otherwise quiet bathroom. You had made sure you were the only one in here in fear of someone else showing up but now it was as if everything around you was blurred.

The stick in your hand was just as blurry as everything else. How could this be possible? How was it even possible? None of it made sense to your mind.

“I can’t be fucking pregnant.” You stated to yourself but when you looked into the mirror to see your devastated expression reality hit you hard.

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Preference #58: You Catch Him Masturbating

Warning: Contains Some Sexual Content, View At Your Own Risk!!!

Calum: You weren’t really sure what you were hearing. Calum’s low grunts sounded muffled behind the door. Your hand clamped over your mouth as you tried to hold in your gasp. “Ah fuck,” Calum moaned out, you could hear a high pitched moan echo around the room and your mind raced as the worst came to mind. Calum moaned again and you realized you couldn’t stand there and listen to him cheat on you any longer. You pushed the door open in anger only to find Calum in the room by himself watching porn. Calum jumped in surprise, immediately hiding his hard on. “Oh-my. I’m s-sorry I just thought…” you stuttered out, your hands covering your face in embarrassment. The sounds of porn was still playing and you had to stifle your laughter. “I thought  you weren’t going to be home for another hour?” Calum asked, ignoring what was playing on his laptop and focusing on you. “Can you turn that off?” you questioned, feeling slightly uncomfortable at his choice of porn. He hit the pause button and reached out for his boxers. You leaned against the door frame with crossed arms. “The appointment ended early,” you told him with a sigh. You chewed on your bottom lip then shook your head. “I’m gonna start on dinner…you can continue with that.” Calum gave you a sheepish smile, placing two fingers to his forehead and waving it forward in a goodbye. This wasn’t something he wanted to discuss with you right now, glad that you had adverted the conversation to something else. 

Ashton: It had been so long since Ashton had gotten some release. You had been away on a business trip for about a week now and Ashton was starting to miss you desperately. He was sat on the bed, hand slowly stroking at his length. Ashton was trying to imagine it was you. His eyes closed as he imagined your naked body hovering over him. Ashton’s thumb swirled around the head of his length as if it was your tongue. He was working himself up so much. Chest rising at a steady rhythm as his strokes picked up the pace. “Fuck baby just like that,” Ashton hummed, picturing your lips wrapping around his length. Unbeknownst to Ashton you had arrived home early. In an attempt to surprise him for his birthday. He was too busy caught up in pleasuring himself to hear you come home. Headphones in, eyes closed, and working on reaching his release. “Ashton!’ you exclaimed, skipping into the room only to come to a skidded halt. He had heard your call through the headphones, eyes snapping open in surprise. You bit onto your bottom lip, trying to hide the grin that was spreading out across your face. “You couldn’t wait for me uh?” you questioned, eyes trailing down to his hard length. Ashton pulled at his headphones and smiled up at you. “Well are you going to come help me or what? I miss you baby girl,” Ashton said, beckoning you over. You sauntered over to him, ready to give Ashton the blowjob he had been imaging about. 

Michael: “Holy shit, sorry I didn’t mean to-are you?” your eyes were wide as you tried hard not to look at Michael’s length. You weren’t expecting to walk in on him masturbating. His face scrunched up in pleasure and hand stroking at his length at a rapid pace. You had walked in at the wrong time. Michael’s moans were loud as he came. His load coming out in three hot spurts and landing on his stomach. What made the whole thing awkward was the fact that Michael had held eye contact with you as he came. The lust in his eyes had faded into embarrassment as he realized what had just happened. “Geez, Y/N ever heard of knocking?” Michael huffed, grabbing a pillow from behind him and covering his now flaccid length. Michael reached out for a tissue and tried to clean up his load as discreetly as he could. You were too much in shock to notice, but somehow felt your skin burn when you realized Michael had moaned your name when he came. Of course it was out of shock from you walking in on him, but it sounded so hot to hear him say it. To hear him moan and whine it. “If you wanted a show all you had to do was ask,” Michael joked, tossing the tissue box at you to get your attention. You quickly dodged the box and shot him a glare. “Next time you want to masturbate quiet your moans.  You sound like a dying whale,” you replied in a joking manner. Michael smiled with a roll of his eyes. “Well can you get out so I can ya know?” he said, gesturing down to his naked body. You quickly nodded, head dropping low as you left the room. You couldn’t help but to feel aroused. Sexual feelings for your best friend starting to cloud your mind. 

Luke: He was a fumbling mess. Cheeks red as the heat from his arousal spread throughout his body. Luke couldn’t get his mind to focus on the porn playing in front of him. His mind tracing back to the images of you in the shower. You had been on Luke’s mind for months now. He was craving your body and touch. His desire for you only growing by the second. Luke’s hand was stroking at his length. The hardened mass was covered in lube making each stroke slick as can be. Luke’s mouth parted and small whimpers left his lips as he reached down to play with his balls. He was in the zone, head falling back as the pleasure overtook him and your name left his lips in hushed whispers. “Hey, Luke I was thinking we should check out this new res-” your words trailed off as you came to a stop in front of him. Eyes wide in shock at what you had just walked in on. “Y/N?” Luke questioned in surprise, quickly placing his length back into his boxers. This didn’t help one bit, the tent in his boxer briefs growing even more as he looked at you. “Wow,” you said slowly, trying to wrap your mind around what was occurring. “Didn’t think you still masturbated. That’s like high school ain’t it,” you chuckled, wiggling your eyebrows at him in amusement. “Everyone does it alright,” Luke whined, “A man’s got needs.” You smirked at his words, the tension in the room becoming thick. “You know you could have just asked,” you sang out, walking away from Luke in tease. “Well then can you help me now?” Luke called out after you. “Y/N!” he shouted in a whine. You wanted to make him beg for a bit eventually coming back to fulfill his needs. 

Classically Romanced

Request:  Preferably meeting in a bookshop and realising we are literally the person of each other’s dreams?  I am kind and passionate about books particularly Shakespeare and other classics.

Summary: Chilling in a bookshop when a rude dude decides to be rude and someone comes to save the day.  A little romance begins to bud.

Tom Hiddleston x Reader

Word Count: 919

A/N:  I am working on the few requests that I have received now that I am out of uni for the summer! This is the first one, and I hope you enjoy!

              Flipping through the pages of Shakespeare’s Coriolanus, you reread this controversial classic. Although some believe that Shakespeare was not the original author of the play, you still thoroughly enjoyed its story.  The gentle music playing through your earphones aided in establishing a lovely bookstore ambience.  Through using your earphones and being clearly engrossed in your reading, you had created a large, metaphorical, neon sign, plastered above your head that stated, “DO NOT DISTURB.”  While this “sign” would have been evident to any human being with any wit about them, some more oblivious characters were blind to social etiquette.  As the chair across from you scooted out from the table, you attempted to pay no heed to the person now sitting at your table.  Faint mumbles drifted through the air and landed upon your preoccupied ears.  With undeniable annoyance written on your features, you shifted your focused gaze off of your book and onto your offender.

              “What do you want, Anthony?” You made no effort to conceal the disinterest that heavily coated your tone as you removed one of your earbuds.

              “Oh, you know,” he blathered as his roaming eyes raked your viewable body, “I was just wondering what you were doing later today.”

              “How many times must I repeat myself?” You rhetorically inquired.  “No matter the content of my plans, they will never involve you.”

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Say No To This (M) – Best Friend!Hoseok

Originally posted by ohparkjimin

Summary: It’s been a while since you and Hoseok have spent time with each other, but he hasn’t forgotten how hard it is to say no to you.

Warning: Smut, oh my lord is there smut

Word Count: 3.4k

A/N: So I’ve had Say No to This from Hamilton stuck in my head for the past week and it somehow inspired BFF!Hobi sex.

Sequel: Ambiguous (M)

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The Tattoo Artist

Pairing: Y/N/Soulmate!Calum

Rating: PG-All

Request: No

Words: 4.450+

Summary: In which everyone gets a name tattoo of their soulmate on their wrist when they turn eighteen but Y/N doesn’t believe in it and wants hers covered up by the male tattoo artists whose shop is right down the street

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Preference Master List

This is for all of you mobile users I guess. Also most of the IM5 preferences include Dalton. Check this for updates!!

5 Seconds of Summer: 

  1.  How You Meet
  2.  You Take Care Of Him When He’s Sick
  3.  Cry On Your Pillow
  4.  Hiding Places
  5.  He Asks You To Move In
  6.  House Hunting
  7.  Moving In
  8.  Midnight Snacks
  9.  The Words That Were Never Said
  10.  Vacations
  11.  Arguments 
  12.  The Pet/s You Two Get
  13.  Risk It All
  14.  One Night Stands 
  15.  Rough
  16.  Your Relationship Becomes Public 
  17.  Get To Know You
  18.  They Find Out You Had Their Child
  19.  He Makes You Squirt 
  20.  You’re Eating Something That Turns Him On
  21.  The Boys Are Over When You Try To Be Sexy
  22.  You Don’t Know He’s Famous
  23.  Accidental Pillow
  24.  Blowjob
  25.  Art of Moving On
  26.  He Finds Out You’re Ticklish 
  27.  They Find Out You Had Their Child Part 2
  28.  English Love Affair
  29.  They Find Out You Had Their Child Part 3
  30.  He’s A Single Father
  31.  “Was This Just a Fuck?”
  32.  His/Your Child From a Previous Relationship Calls You or Him Mommy/Daddy
  33.  You’re the Concert Photographer 
  34.  Chains
  35.  He Surprises You
  36.  “The Name’s Bond…”
  37.  Threesomes
  38.  Coffee Shops
  39.  Bonnie And Clyde
  40.  Burn
  41.  Distractions
  42.  Dry Humping
  43.  Spring Break
  44.  Eat Out
  45.  Tour Vibes
  46.  The Amazing Race
  47.  Soulmate AU
  48.  Crazy For You
  49.  He Finds Out You’re Being Abused
  50.  Disney World
  51.  Saturday Nights
  52.  Sunday Mornings
  53.  Back To Sleep
  54.  Black Girl Magic
  55.  First Time Dad
  56.  Long Distance
  57.  “Please Just Fuck Me”
  58.  You Catch Him Masturbating
  59.  Bonding

Fly Away Hero: 

*Fly Away Hero Imagines (x) since it’s replaced by OGOC

  1.  You Take Care Of Him When He’s Sick
  2.  How You Meet
  3.  You Meet The Band
  4.  Settle Down
  5.  You Tell Him You’re Pregnant 
  6.  He Talks Dirty To You In Public 
  7.  His Favorite Place To Kiss You 
  8.  He Proposes 
  9.  You’re Short
  10.  You Tell Him You’re Pregnant Part 2
  11.  The Pet/s You Two Get
  12.  You Tell Him You’re Pregnant Part 3
  13.  Ride
  14.  Keep Quiet 
  15.  How To Save A Life 
  16.  You Tell Him You’re Pregnant Part 4
  17.  They Find Out You Had Their Child 
  18.  Makeup Sex
  19.  He Takes Care Of You When You’re Sick
  20.  You Tell Him You’re Pregnant Part 5
  21.  Watching Your Favorite Tim Burton Movie
  22.  Strip For Me
  23.  He’s a Tease
  24.  Mad
  25. He Makes Sexual Innuendos Towards You During An Interview
  26.  They Find Out You Had Their Child Part 2
  27.  He Gets Upset That You Don’t Spend Time Together
  28.  They Find Out You Had Their Child Part 3
  29.  He Asks You To Prom

Omaha Squad:

  1. Promise
  2. You Get High Together
  3. A Thunderstorm Is Coming, And You’re Both Stuck In A Cab In L.A. Traffic
  4. Blind Dates
  5. Valentine’s Day
  6. “Don’t Tease Me”
  7.  Cheater
  8.  You Comfort Him
  9.  Fights
  10.  Caught
  11.  Rejections 
  12.  Fallen Angels
  13.  Accidental Break Ins
  14.  Whiskey Dick
  15.  Wisdom Teeth
  16.  New Arrivals 
  17.  Going Downtown
  18.  Midnight
  19.  OTP
  20.  You Don’t Like His Music
  21.  Kink
  22.  Distraction
  23.  Festivals


  1.  How You Meet
  2.  First Date 
  3.  His Thoughts When He First Saw You 
  4.  He Gets Jealous 
  5.  Another Band Member Likes You
  6.  He Hears You Sing
  7.  The Youtuber/s You Two Love
  8.  He Talks About Your Weight
  9.  He Pushes You to Have Sex and 1 of the Boys Comfort You
  10.  He Thinks You Like Another Band Member 
  11.  You’re Making Out and His Parents Walk In
  12.  He Meets Your Brother
  13.  You’re Making Out and Your Brother Walks in With Friends
  14.  He Gets Protective 
  15.  He Whispers Dirty Things To You In Public
  16.  He Brings Up the Idea of Starting a Family
  17.  Your Water Breaks and He Helps You
  18.  He Sees the Baby for the First Time
  19.  He Calls You Ugly 
  20.  He Asks You To Prom
  21.  You’re Doing Dirty Things and the Boys Walk In
  22.  How They React To Baby Shopping
  23.  He Hates You At First
  24.  You Go To The Zoo
  25.  They Call Out Your Imperfections 
  26.  He Secretly Likes You And The Boys Convince Him To Ask You Out 
  27.  You’re Friends With Benefits 
  28.  You’re Friends & Make Out At A Party 
  29.  You Play Truth Or Dare
  30.  You’re Friends & See Him Naked
  31.  You’re Best Friends That Flirt 
  32.  He’s Your Best Friend’s Brother
  33.  He Tries To Impress You
  34.  You Overhear Him Confess His Love For You
  35.  You’re Best Friends With 1 Of The Boys And Meet The Others
  36.  Still Into You
  37.  He Let’s You Know He Wants You
  38.  You Meet While Playing Spin The Bottle/ 7 Minutes In Heaven
  39.  You Take Care Of Him When He’s Sick
  40.  He Gets Touchy
  41.  Meeting After Breakup
  42.  You Have Sex For The First Time
  43.  They’re In A Gang, And You Like A Member 
  44.  He Talks Dirty To You With The Guys Around & He Picks Out A Naughty Outfit For You
  45.  His Favorite Place To Kiss You
  46.  They’re In A Gang, And You Like A Member Part 2
  47.  Angry Makeup Sex
  48.  They’re In A Gang, And You Like A Member Part 3
  49.  The Pet/s You Two Get
  50.  Disney Dudez Romantic Modern Moment 
  51.  They Have Kinks
  52.  They’re In A Gang, And You Like A Member Part 4
  53.  They’re In A Gang, And You Like A Member Part 5
  54.  He Loses Your Child In The Store
  55.  They Find Out You Had Their Child
  56.  Silent Quickie
  57.  The Act Like Fuckboys 
  58.  They’re In A Gang, And You Like A Member Part 6
  59.  You’re Leaving Him
  60.  He Gets Shipped With A Member From Fifth Harmony
  61.  Birthday Sex
  62.  You Passed Away and He Tries to Cope With Your Death
  63. They’re In A Gang, And You Like A Member Part 7
  64. They Find Out You Had Their Child Part 2
  65.  They Propose to You
  66.  They Find Out You Had Their Child Part 3
  67.  They’re In A Gang, And You Like A Member Part 8
  68.  You’re a Virgin, and Have Sex for the First Time
  69.  Shower Run Ins
  70.  The Birds and the Bees
  71.  He Finds Out You’re Pregnant
  72.  They’re In A Gang, And You Like A Member Part 9
  73.  They’re In A Gang, And You Like A Member Part 10
  74.  You Spend the Night for the First Time
  75.  You’re Leaving Him Part 2
  76.  Greasers & Socs
  77.  Amnesia
  78.  Wet
  79.  The Guys Help Feed Your Child
  80.  Cooking Vibes
  81.  Thinking Out Loud
  82.  Morning Wood
  83.  He Comes Home From War
  84.  Love Confessions 
  85.  Possible Parents
  86.  Your Dad Is a Gang Leader
  87.  They’re In A Gang, And You Like A Member Part 11
  88.  Silent Treatment 
  89.  Fingers
  90.  You Wear His Clothes
  91.  Jealousy 


A Soft Crescendo

Many months ago I wrote something for the Hannibal Big Bang, and I promised @fragile-teacup I would write some more for it. I don’t know if she even remembers that, but I have worked on it some over the months. I decided to post chapter 2 today, and I hope she and everyone enjoys! Thanks Alex for being the nagging voice in the back of my head to keep writing this and also thank you for all the beautiful prose you write! 

(Artwork was created by @hannahthemighty for the fic during the bang.)

Notes:  Hannibal and Will hide out in Mexico. This chapter follows some snapshots of their life together as Will struggles to come to terms with their relationship and with himself. They live together in a dance of unbearable intimacy and excruciating distance. Some hurt/comfort and some smut to be found here.

Will pulled the sweaty shirt over his head and threw it on the floor. His whole body was covered in a light sheen of sweat. The small, cheap motel they were in had a broken air conditioner and the rising temperatures left the third-floor room hot and muggy. The walls were yellow and heavily spackled, the paint peeling and slightly greying. There was a watercolor painting of a woman in a red sundress walking down a deserted street with her son. Other than that the room was sparse with no decoration. Will tried to rest on the bed. Hannibal had removed the bedding provided and used his own clean, new sheets. Will flipped through the channels. They were all in Spanish, and he could only understand half of it. Grabbing the bottle of tequila, he took a couple of swigs. It took the edge off of the swollen waiting.

He walked into the bathroom and looked in the mirror at his face, skinnier than it had been in a while. He rubbed his thumbs over the bags under his eyes and sighed deeply. The shower let out a high-pitched scream when he turned it on; it was old and the water pressure low. But, the cold water was a relief, and he sighed deeply as the drops caressed his skin. He ran his fingers through his hair and tried to relax. The city was hot and busy, and he was feeling restless with nowhere to go and little to do. He didn’t know where Hannibal was exactly, but he had a vague idea. They had been here for six months and had come to an agreement. Hannibal could kill once a month as long as it was someone who had done something terrible enough to deserve it. Will had no way of knowing if he was following through, however.

The feel of a hand against his shoulder startled him, and he yelped softly, beginning to look around for something to defend himself before quickly realizing that it was Hannibal.

“You scared the hell out of me,” Will said catching his breath. “I didn’t hear you to come in.”

“You need to be more careful, Will. What if it hadn’t been me?” Hannibal half-chided.

Will reached for his towel, but Hannibal reached out and grabbed Will’s forearm. “Don’t.”

Will noted the excitement in Hannibal’s eyes. He must have achieved his goal.

Hannibal unbuttoned the loose, white shirt he was wearing and placed it neatly on a hanger in the closet.

“Hurry up,” Will called, rubbing soap over his chest while he waited.

“Shhh,” Hannibal replied, his voice was dangerous and low.

Will could tell he was in for a treat.

Hannibal removed his pants and briefs just as carefully. Will could tell he was gathering himself, focusing on steadying his breath.

Will would let him have his way, let him be rough, would join in eagerly.

“I wish you had been there, Will.” He lamented as he pushed open the curtain and let himself inside the small shower, placing both his hands on Will’s hips. The energy was tense, but slow and building, not near the crescendo it would be later.

Will stared at the mess of hair on Hannibal’s chest and the slow, deep rise and fall of his breath.

“I’m here now.” Will said, voice already breathy.

The shower wasn’t ideal for sex. But the stifling heat still made it the best option.

“I suppose that will have to do,” Hannibal said, pushing Will against the wall and grinding their hips together. Their cocks slid against each other, pressing into each other’s stomachs. Will was feeling a little heady from the tequila. All he could think of was Hannibal’s hands, on his hips, on his sides, on his shoulders, as he caressed Will’s body roughly.

Their kisses were rougher than normal, Hannibal bit him hard, and Will gasped a bit in pain, pressing his hand up to his lip, blood oozing onto his fingertips.

“I would say sorry, but you look so delightful in your own blood,” Hannibal sucked the wound, licking Will’s blood. It had a distinct flavor; Hannibal had always told Will he would recognize it easily.

“Don’t be sorry.” Will turned around, placing his hands on the chipped tile, presenting himself submissively and without shame.

Hannibal’s fingers opened him up roughly but attentively. Will’s forehead pressed against the wall, his lips parted as he moaned, droplets of water from his hair falling down his face.

“Do it now.” Will begged.

With a groan and a push, Hannibal moved his length inside of him. It ached a bit. Hannibal was impatient. So was Will. Their bodies moved in a fast, erratic rhythm. This was when it all made sense to Will. All the questions and frustrations fell away like the water running off their bodies, swirling down the drain, as their flesh and breath became one.


“I want to go fishing,” Will said out loud to the room. Hannibal was lying beside him on the bed, and Will was attempting to read a book of classical poetry Hannibal had left around. He was having trouble focusing, however. “The weather here reminds me a bit of summers in New Orleans. While I prefer our last home, I was thinking I could find some things to do around here. Feel more myself again.” He was trying to figure out his own thoughts, figure out a way to break out of the monotony, but he didn’t mind hearing Hannibal’s insights either.

“We could easily find you the supplies you need, Will. I could help you find a spot. We will need a house or somewhere more permanent to settle for a time, anyway. I can’t take much more of these dirty, loud hovels,” Hannibal replied, pressing a soothing hand to Will’s forearm. The space between them seemed to be growing wider each day. Will’s confused feelings manifesting in an unwillingness to engage. They talked less than normal. Will rarely let Hannibal touch him But, in this moment, he let Hannibal ease him into an embrace.

“Things will feel more normal soon, Will.” He promised.


A few months later, they settled into a place along the coast. The small, but cozy villa overlooked the ocean, beautiful in the brilliant setting sun. An explosion of yellows, oranges, and soft reds that contrasted with the almost too blue of the water. There were barely any waves; the night was gentle and warm, full of tension, heavy with lazy expectation. The hot, stillness was interrupted by a bottle thrown from the villa balcony, shattering into pieces on a rock below.

“Fuck,” Will cursed to the hot wind. He worried momentarily about sea turtles or birds getting hurt by the glass and vowed to clean up the mess as soon as he was sober enough to figure out how to walk down to the beach.

After a moment of deliberation, he decided he would be able to manage and walked tipsily towards the steps. It took a good amount of time, and a lot of clinging to the old, metal railing, but he made his way to the white sand and walked to the edge of the water.

Will slipped off his sandals and pressed his feet hard into the sand and water, focusing on the irritation of the sand against his skin and the soft rhythm of the waves. If he could have, he would have screamed to the empty, glittering, black sky. But he was never one to be able to express such extreme outbursts of emotion, even when he wanted to.

“What are you doing out here?” Hannibal’s voice, only a few paces back, startled him and he whirled around.

“Fuck, don’t sneak up on me like that. I thought you were in bed,” Will turned away from him, his energy cool and body language stiff.

“I thought I heard something outside, and I looked and you were gone. So, I followed you here,” Hannibal’s eyes searched over Will’s form and came to stand next to him, pressing a hand to his shoulder, but Will shrugged him off.

“Don’t,” Will admonished softly, but with a hard edge. He wasn’t in the mood for games, for world play, for exhausting metaphors. His head hurt, his mind hurt, his heart hurt.

“Please,” Hannibal’s voice was so soft, so pleading, so tender, it softened Will’s stance for a moment, and he turned slightly toward him.

Will began to reach for Hannibal’s hand but instead thought better of it and turned away from Hannibal again.

“It’s been so long since I’ve really touched you, held you…” Will rarely heard Hannibal speak like this. It was romantic, apologetic, and Will was surprised at how well this manipulation was working.

“Don’t. Just don’t. I can’t. Even if I wanted to, I just can’t right now. It’s too much,” Will could hear himself rambling, his words slurring. All he knew was his defenses were starting to fall with the liquor clouding his reasoning and Hannibal so close with his words so sweet.

“You don’t have to make a permanent decision right now, Will. It doesn’t have to be written in blood and stone…” Hannibal’s voice faltered momentarily. “Come to bed. We can talk about death, aesthetics, and morality tomorrow.”

Will’s resistance was crumbling down rapidly, Hannibal could always rip the walls down, walls that were fortified against all others, with a few words or glances.

“I don’t know…” But his voice and stance were softer now, and he slowly pressed the back of his head against Hannibal’s shoulder. Hannibal’s arms wrapped around his waist and rocked him gently, almost in tandem with the waves.

“Please stay,” Hannibal’s words were near pleading now. “I’ve never been terrified of anything as much as I am of losing you…all of the things that gave life meaning: poetry, art, music, philosophy will be grey and dull without you to share them with. Now that I know how much richer it is to partake with you.” Hannibal breathed against Will’s neck, nuzzling the softness of his curls and taking comfort in his scent and closeness.

Will brushed a hand quickly to his cheek to brush off a tear. “All right,” Will sighed, his hands resting atop Hannibal’s, leaning into Hannibal’s embrace. “Let’s go to bed. I’ve…I’ve missed sharing a bed with you.” Will admitted. This conversation was too intimate, too honest, it almost hurt how hyper-aware and attuned they were to each other in this moment. And the alcohol was making him far too open, far too sappy…

With Hannibal’s help returning inside was a lot easier, he kept a tight hold around Will’s waist, almost as if he was scared if he let Will go for even a moment that he would slip away.

Will slipped off his shoes and shirt and climbed into the soft, white sheets. Hannibal crawled beside him and brought Will close against his chest, stroking his face and over his arms in repetitive, calming motions.

Hannibal kissed Will’s lips gently, attempted to push the kiss further but Will pulled away. “It’s nice to feel you again, Will. To have you back in my arms.”

“For now., You have me back for now. There are conditions. There are things to be worked out.”

“I promise we will.”

“But not tonight, please.” Will pleaded. His voice was low and tired. He pressed his face into Hannibal’s chest.

“No, not tonight.” Hannibal kissed his head softly.

You can read the first chapter or leave a comment on this chapter on AO3. 

Touch of a Lifetime - Damian Wayne x Reader

This story was requested by @gracesnowstorm

I hope you enjoy dear!

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1279


Hiding the fact that you were a meta-human had never been easy, especially when your power was based on the sense of touch. Whether it was simple brush while walking down the street or a full on touch from a friend, you instantly saw every good and bad thing that happened in a person’s life up to that point.

Sometimes it was a blessing. You were able to see what made your grandparents the perfect couple, and you were able to help people forget traumatic experiences from their past.

Sometimes it was curse. More often than not people hated the idea of you seeing into their pasts. Bullies were everywhere. It got so bad that you started wearing long pants and hoodies and walking with your hands in your pockets at all times just to keep from touching anyone.

You had done a pretty good job until you’d gotten in to Gotham Academy. There you met Damian Wayne, the prince of Gotham City and he changed your life. It turned out that he was a bit of a loner too since he thought everyone was beneath him, so you often found that you both sit in the far end of the cafeteria away from the rest of the kids in the school.

One day he sat down in front of you with his tray and said, “You seem like the least insufferable person at this school so I’ve decided to converse with you at lunch for the duration of the semester.”

You blinked slowly and a look of ‘what the hell’ forming across your face. “Uh, sure. I mean it’s a free country so sit wherever you want.”
He nodded in agreement and started eating his lunch. The two of you spent the rest of the lunch in silence, much like every day for the rest of the week.

Over time the two of you became quite the pair. You were inseparable throughout your classes and you often hung out at each other’s homes. But you couldn’t help but think that Damian was hiding something. You didn’t blame him cause you haven’t exactly told him your own secret. You were honesty okay with that until one day over the summer.

It was the height of the summer and your air conditioner had decided to peter out. Since you hadn’t planned on going anywhere you were clad in shorts and one of the few tank tops you owned.

You were lazily sketching on your bed when you heard a knock at your window sill.

“Can I come in?” Damian said while his leg was already half way through.

“You do know that using the door is a totally okay thing for you to do right?

“Tt. I would prefer to not interact with anyone other than you today.”

He flopped down on the bed next to you with a fairly heavy sigh.

You sat in a comfortable silence until Damian started to sigh. Repeatedly every few minuets.
You put your pencil down onto your sketchbook and look over your shoulder at him.

“Okay I’ll bite. What’s bothering you Bub?”

He shoots up off the bed and starts to pace.

“My mother made an appearance last night.”
You had heard a lot about Talia over the years, none of it had been good in any sense of the word.

“She wants…wanted me to come back home with her. I obviously refused, but the situation ended in an altercation between her and my father. I am slightly worried that this will not be the end to her crusade to get me back. Things could become….extreme to say the least.”
You sit up from the bed and move to stand in his way.

“You pace any more and there will be a track in my carpet. You and your dad are some great people. I’ve yet to meet a situation that the two of you couldn’t handle, especially if your brothers join in, You have nothing to be worried about.”

“Thank you, Y/N. You always seem to know what to say.”

He smiled and then did something unexpected, he hugged you. The moment his arms made contact with your skin it was like a bucket of ice water was dumped over your head.

You were instantly transported back to Damian’s past. You saw a toddler crying out for the loving touch of a mother, a small boy void of all emotion in the middle of training with a sword, and him in the Robin outfit having a horrible reaction to what looked like Scarecrow’s fear toxin.

You don’t know how long you had been in Damian’s past but when you came through you definitely weren’t standing anymore.

It took a few seconds but when you could focus you saw Damian kneeling in front of you a concerned look across his face.

“Y/N! Y/N! Are you okay? Talk to me please!”
You looked at him for a moment before flinging your arms around his neck as tears streamed down your face.

“Oh Dami, I am so sorry that you’ve had to live through all that. No one should have to do that. I want you to know that no matter what your mother has done that you are loved. By your father, by your brothers and Alfred and me. You don’t ever have to go to whatever that awful place was.”

Halfway through speaking Damian stiffened. He had never told you anything about the league or how his mother had treated him during trading, but you seemed to know everything.

He slowly unwound your arms from his neck and held you at arms length.

“Y/N, how do you know about the League?”

“League? What league?”

“The League of Assassins, it was where I was raised, in Nanda Parbat. The was the awful place you were mentioning?”

You paused for a second.

“I guess so? I don’t see super specifics, only snippets like I was watching a movie.”

He looked at you with confusion.

“What to you mean by ‘see’ Y/N?”

You look down at your hands and contemplate telling him the truth. You guess it’s inevitable since he just witnessed one of your episodes.

“I’m…um…I’m what’s known as an Empath. If I touch someone I can see their past and feel their emotions. Sometimes I can even take those memories away if they want. I usually keep it in check and try not to touch or tell people. Most of the time they think it’s an invasion of their privacy. You caught me off guard so when we hugged I was overwhelmed.”

He sat back on his heels and looked like he was contemplating the information you just unloaded onto him.

After a few minutes he looked you in the eye. “Why didn’t you tell me before now?”

“Being seen as a freak isn’t exactly something I enjoy, Damian, so I learned a long time ago that not telling people was best. It not like you been truthful either, Robin.”

“Tt. I guess you’re right. Although there is literally no one that knows I’m Robin except my family.”

“I feel so honored then,” the sarcasm only slightly evident in your tone.

“Okay, okay. How about from here on out we agree to no more secrets between the two of us?”

He raised his hand with his pinky finger held out.

You looked in his eyes and saw that he truly wanted to be honest with you, and deep down you felt that he probably needed someone to be honest with. After a few seconds you link your pinky with his.

“Sounds like a plan Bub.”

When We Collide (Part 4)

Pairing: Assistant!Y/N/CEO!Luke

Rating: PG-All

Parts: 1 | 2 | 3

Summary: He is the definition of high class smart ass, swimming in Dom Pierre Pérignon champagne and has never seen the shadow of poverty. She is underprivileged, lives in a messy dorm room on sale and struggles working as an assistant after being thrown out of college. But how will they collide when Luke makes Y/N pregnant after a drunkenly one night stand?

”I’m here, spill all the details!”

It was as if a huge morning shock went through your body when Nicole practically slammed herself in front of the coffee machine to get your attention and almost made you drop the package of white coffee cops you were about to take out.

“What are you talking about?” You confusedly questioned, you had been so caught up in your own business that your heart had skipped a beat or two by her small jump scare.

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Coffee Shop Rescue IV

Pairing: Peter Parker x Female Reader

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1340

Summary: You’re enjoying your time with Peter, and start making connections. (I’m so so sorry this has taken so long. I just graduated college and had to move and I’m working on finding a job, and I got a one week job at a summer camp, and I got rear-ended, and yeah, life has been hectic, but I’ve missed this story so much! And mostly I miss you all! But I also wrote myself into a corner that I just figured out how to get out of, so here it goes…)

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3

You learned a lot about Peter over the following weeks. He was right - he was a nerd, absolutely, but so were you, just about different things. He knew photography and science, you knew literature and grammar. The common ground came to movies and tv shows, which you were both pleased to find out you had a lot in common on that front. You were more into Star Wars while he preferred Star Trek, and he liked Narnia to your Lord of the Rings, but you both loved Harry Potter possibly more than should be considered reasonable (and were both able to realize that Snape is a controversial character but not exactly a good one, which was the most important thing in regards to that fandom). You could debate the two for hours - and had - without actually getting angry at each other.

T.V. was a little different, neither of you had much to get heavily involved in shows, but you were still clinging to the ones you’d had time for in college. Peter, on the other hand, tended to jump between shows sporadically.

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Abusive - Request

Requested by @thestrawberryblondehobbitbatch​:  Hi. I was wondering if you’d do a Sherlock x reader are married. They are out on a date when the readers abusive ex boyfriend turns up while Sherlocks popped to the gents.

Summary: In an attempt to escape from reporters, Sherlock and (Y/N) end uo at a very dark restaurant. He excuses himself and leaves her alone for a few minutes without knowing that her abusive ex-boyfriend was a waiter there.

Pairing: Sherlock x reader.

Warnings: Abusive ex-boyfriend, is there really anything else to say?

Word count: 1,789

A/N: Don’t know if the ex is too much of an insane man… I have been reading “It” and, however’s read it knows why, that is the reason I wrote him like this. Also, as someone who’s seen abuse from up close, I beg of you guys, if you’re in an abusive relationship or know someone who is DO NOT stay quiet, you’ve got to talk and get help. Please. This is just fiction, there won’t be a Sherlock Holmes to rescue us, or even so an easy way to escape on your own. So please, do get informed and get help. I repeat, this is fiction.


Originally posted by silentauroriamthereal

The little restaurant was full. Every single table had been taken by either a couple or a family, and they were all chatting like they hadn’t seen each other in ages. The waiters were walking quickly to deliver the orders to the correct table, and the cooks were struggling to get every plate on time. The musicians were full of different songs – some songs were completely unknown to them – and the person in charge of the entrance was trying with all her might to calm every one down.

“It’s unbelievable how many people want to come into this place.” Sherlock observed. Of course, he had noticed everything.

“They don’t…”

“I know.” He interrupted his wife, “Half of them are reporters, the other half are fans.”

“You’re such a celebrity.” She joked. Sherlock smirked proudly, a few crinkles framing his blue eyes.

“You know what to order?” He asked.

“No… The menu is quite limited.” The mischievous smile that formed on his lips made it clear that he didn’t want to stay at that crowded place. “Where?”

“There’s another one, down the block, closer from home.” He whispered, leaning closer to give a stronger sense of privacy. “We can sneak through the back door, fool those paparazzi.”

“The things I do for you.” She sighed and then both of them followed Sherlock’s mind plan.

The back of the restaurant was dark and it smelled like fish, but it had a direct access to the opposite street, which was free of people. Sherlock and (Y/N) ran all the way to the other restaurant Sherlock had in mind. Hiding in the shadows, letting out breathy giggles and, most importantly, enjoying each other’s company.

Said restaurant was empty, and the dim lights worked perfectly as a cover up. No one could see the other’s faces unless they were at the same table or a waiter used to such lack of light.

The food of course wasn’t as good as the one from the last restaurant. It had a rather artificial flavour instead of the homely one Sherlock adored, but even so just being able to spend a night off with her was enough.

Two whole hours went by and they were about to leave. Sherlock popped to the gents while (Y/N) waited at the table, munching at a mint they had given them along with their change after paying the check.

She had felt like someone stared at her ever since she and Sherlock entered the restaurant. But she was so used to being followed either by reporters, Mycroft’s spies or Moriarty’s spies it could really be anyone. And she wasn’t doing anything bad, so she wasn’t worried to be caught on camera.


He had stared at her for those two hours. That slut. Giggling like an idiot, playing with her hair, caressing his palm… Of course she was doing it, he was a famous detective – a genius even – who led him to the next question: How come he hadn’t noticed yet what kind of whore she truly was?

He then left her alone. Alone in that dark place, vulnerable. The anger he had felt, locked inside him for ages, was now rising from the flames of his own inner Hell. His knuckles hurt, ached to feel her soft skin break over them, wanting to get splattered with her blood once more.

The mere thought of her pretty face covered in bruises excited him, making tingles appear all over his body in anticipation. The place was dark, he only needed to drag her a bit further away from her table, and so she wouldn’t know what hit her – literally.

He walked slowly towards her; like a predator haunting its prey before attacking. Observing her every move, her naïve expression, her… Her red lips. Those lips that made him lose control, in the exact tone that got his fury to unleash. She loved that colour that shade, it truly reflected her inner self: A whore.

He slid at the opposite side of the table, with his dark eyes glued to her who was distracted getting something from her bag.

“Have you seen my…?” She lifted her gaze, and the pure sight of the man who still gave her nightmares made her freeze. She was frightened to death.

Her blood started running faster, her lungs were lacking of enough air to contain her anxiety. Her heart skipped beats and then recovered them in a few seconds, which caused an inconsistent beating. Her hands, armpits and forehead started sweating, and her knees tingled, begging her to run. The ghosts of the past impacts invaded her mind, and all she could feel was the many bruises that were now long gone but used to belong on her face and arms. Her lower ribs and legs burned, remembering all those kicks and mislead punches they had received. Her lips went dry, and not even the lipstick could get them to hold them from breaking. She wanted to scream, but there was a knot on her throat avoiding a single sound to come out of her. Her flawless skin turned so pale anyone would’ve swore she was a ghost and her eyes hurt. She hadn’t blinked, she couldn’t, scared that he would use those seconds of blindness to harm her.

“You remember me.” He said as a wicked smile grew on his face. That smile, that cursed omen that warned her about the upcoming violence. It was there, right in front of her, directed to her once again.

“Please go away.” She begged in a whisper so low he could barely hear it.

He tisked his tongue and leaned closer. “I can’t leave, slut.” He whispered back, although his voice was audible, “I work here.”

(Y/N) tried to get up from the table, but he just slammed his fist once over the wooden surface and her instincts made her sit back. She hadn’t forgotten his rules.

“Who’s that man?” He asked, and (Y/N) knew who he was referring to.

“Don’t you watch the telly?” She inquired, trying to be brave like that time she escaped. He hissed back, showing all of his teeth.

“Sherlock Holmes, of course I know. What I mean is who is that man to you?” (Y/N) froze, hiding both of her hands under the table. Wanting to keep the diamond ring out of his sight.

“Her husband.” A third voice stated from behind him. Sherlock stepped closer, making the dim light shine over his face. “Who are you?”

He got up and tried to stand up in an authoritarian pose. Of course, Sherlock was taller, but even so he had the face of a maniac and that was pretty intimidating.

“Let me guess,” Sherlock smiled triumphant, “that poor bastard that… Yeah, of course.” The detective didn’t want to say it out loud, knowing exactly how she felt about it. “Think you can get her back to the cave of horrors?” A cruel chuckle left his plump lips, “C’mon, we both know you prefer to be the one beating rather than being the one beaten. So don’t make me bring you back to those summer days when mommy would hit you with a hot metal bar.”

“You think you’re smart?” He fumed. Of course mommy had hit him with a hot metal bar as a child, right on the palms of his hands – he still had the scars – but how could Sherlock know? Not even (Y/N) knew it.

“Smarter than you, yes.” Sherlock replied, “Isn’t that why daddy would punch you. For the low grades and the lack of brains… You think that reflecting that on (Y/N) or really any other woman will help you deal with your anxiety?” Sherlock shook his head, “Nothing will help unless you stop chugging on so much coffee… Although, I can’t really blame you because I wouldn’t want to have the nightmares you have.”

“Don’t make me hit you.” The lunatic warned and Sherlock couldn’t express his thoughts with anything other than a sarcastic laughter.

“You? Hit me?” He huffed, “I’ve dealt with Egyptian murderers and killed each and every single one of them with just one sword… My life’s been threatened more than once and I’ve defended myself. I fought the Golem and so many other criminals that are far better than you. Do you honestly think you scare me?” His voice had gotten lower and faster with each word. He had also leaned closer to the man threatening (Y/N) so that they were at eye level. “Don’t play with me, boy, unless you want to get burned.”

The man pushed him back. Trying to remember how the kids at school would beat him up before he learned how to defend himself – or rather mimic them and use said moves against them – and dodging Sherlock’s attempts to hit him. Although, of course, Sherlock was just distracting him.

It only took four punches. One under the ribs, another one at the back of the neck, the other at the back under his lungs, and the last one directed to the throat. Sherlock punched him in said order so fast nobody actually saw it, however, in just five seconds (Y/N)’s ex was on the floor, finding his will to breathe.

“I can’t believe you dated this pig.” Sherlock complained, “Thank God you changed your mind and ended up with me… Everything all right?”

(Y/N) nodded. “Please, Sher… Let’s just leave.”

“Just one moment.” Sherlock kneeled down to the floor to meet face to face again with the man. “You better disappear, because if I see you again I’ll make sure you never see the light of day again.”

“Sher.” (Y/N) begged, completely oblivious to what his boyfriend was whispering into her ex’s ear.

Sherlock stood back up and took his time to put on his coat and scarf before leaving. Of course, he made sure to step on the man’s stomach on his way out. Nobody touched his girl, less to say, nobody threatened her without Sherlock doing something about it. Everybody knew it, and those who ignored it… Bad things would happen. It was just his way of taking care of the one person that made him feel a lot more than friendship, the one to truly make him feel human rather than an uncomprehended genius. And God knows, Sherlock wouldn’t be able to live without her.

“The things I do for you.” Sherlock repeated her words as they walked out. (Y/N), who was still a nervous wreck, replied with a shy smile and a peck on his cheek. And so they walked through the cold streets of London, back to their tiny flat at 221B Baker Street, where no one would bother them - except for John, maybe.

*Requests are ALWAYS open.*

Pidgance childhood friends AU

In this AU Lance was born in Altea, California and lived there until he was ten, his best friend being the spunky Katie Holt who he lost touch with when he was uprooted to Florida to be closer to family. Eight years later they are reunited at college, but seeing as the other had changed so much they don’t recognize each other right away

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Swinging Lifestyle

100 ways you know you’re a Swinger!
;) ;) ;)
1. You are wearing wristbands in most of your vacation photos.
2. Half of the numbers on your cell phone are listed only by screen names.
3. You are running out of reasons to tell your coworkers why you can’t go out with them this weekend.
4. You have over 50,000 frequent flyer miles on Air Jamaica.
5. You know most of your friends’ by their first names (Rich & Jen, Frank & Beth) but you don’t know their last names.
6. You have more lingerie than a hooker.
7. You had already seen pictures of your friends naked before you ever met them in person.
8. You position the computer screen in such a way your children can’t sneak up on you.
9. You can’t remember the last time you had pubic hair.
10. Before traveling somewhere, you look up couples in that area.
11. You worry about explaining to the neighbors why 10 couples show up on a Saturday night carrying over night bags and don’t leave until Sunday afternoon.
12. Your spouse asks you if you want to have sex, and your first thought is”With who?”
13. Your gynecologist wonders why you’re asking for birth control when he knows that your husband has had a vasectomy.
14. Your hot tub has never had a bathing suit worn in it.
15. Your sex toy collection costs more than your china set.
16. Your wife has a shirt that says: “I Like Girls Too.”
17. You have a stripper’s pole in the middle of your den.
18. You giggle at the golf course when someone asks if they can join you for a foursome.
19. The last thing you typically do at a party is search for your wife’s thong.
20. You’ve hugged your friends goodnight while naked.
21. You hear the word “Playmate” and your first thought is NOT “Playboy”
22. The word “slut” has become a term of endearment.
23. You remember to bring lube before you remember to bring lipstick.
24. Your choice in new carpeting is heavily based on which type won’t give you rug burns.
25. You’ve taken your Liberator with you to a dinner party.
26. The term Vanilla isn’t just a flavor to you.
27. You bet your wife who can score first with that cute girl.
28. You are constantly encouraging your kids to spend the weekend at friends’ houses.
29. You don’t think twice about wearing a short skirt, high heels and fishnets when it’s freezing outside.
30. Your wedding reception has an after party.
31. You get dressed for a party and don’t worry about comfort because your clothes won’t be on for very long.
32. You panic when your friend’s digital camera goes missing.
33. You’ve invited friends over and watched porn.
34. You’ve invited friends over and made porn.
35. You’ve watched someone do a tequila shot off of your wife’s breasts.
36. Your friends know what brand of condom you prefer.
37. You wake up in the morning and find that half of the cloths on the floor don’t fit you or your wife.
38. Your kids think it’s normal for adults to have sleepovers.
39. A hot tub is considered a necessity not a luxury.
40. You believe in Unicorns… Because you’ve actually ridden one.
41. You leave the kids at home when you go to the toy store.
42. You take photos of yourself with your head out of the frames, on purpose.
43. You can’t decide which of your three naughty schoolgirl outfits you should wear tonight.
44. You always keep a supply of condoms, lube and clean hand towels by your bed… And your guest bed… And your couch in the living room.
45. Every day is “Hump Day”, not just Wednesday.
46. You frequently use the term “Friends of friends” when explaining how you know certain people.
47. You know which of your outfits looks best under a black light.
48. You have an entire closet devoted just to themed outfits.
49. You place a ad that reads: “Wanted: Reliable babysitter who is willing to stay till sunrise and doesn’t ask any questions.”
50. You choose furniture based on which best repels semen stains.
51. The staffs at Hedo and Desire send you birthday cards.
52. You come home with that, “There’s Something About Mary” hairstyle.
53. The babysitter wonders why you are always already wearing your full-length coat when she arrives, even in summer.
54. In the gym shower you’re the only guy with shaved balls.
55. You know the most flattering angle at which to photograph your genitals.
56. All of your vacation photos were taken inside your hotel room.
57. You have free places to stay in almost all the fifty states and several cities in Europe.
58. You’ve ended e-mails with “Bi-Bi”.
59. You can expertly identify the differences between every type of breast implants.
60. On Christmas, there are certain presents that can’t be opened in front of your family.
61. You know exactly which of your friends are allergic to latex.
62. Your vanilla friends ask why they are never invited to your parties.
63. The movie “Swingers” was a huge disappointment to you.
64. It’s an unwritten law that you can’t call any of your friends on Saturday or Sunday until at least 3 p.m. so you don’t wake them up.
65. You’ve become especially good at operating your digital camera with one hand.
66. You actually installed a lock on a bedroom closet door that holds your sex-swing and other fun stuff.
67. You’re constantly afraid that visiting relatives will turn on one of your home videos you forgot to hide.
68. You make bets about how long it will take to “convert” your vanilla friend.
69. You’re in a public place and you swear you hear someone shout your screen name.
70. Before introducing them to your visiting family, you pull your friends aside and decide …” Here’s how we know each other…”
71. You start having withdrawals if the swinger’s web site is down.
72. When someone asks where you’re staying on your trip to Cancun, you pretend that you can’t remember the name of the resort.
73. You ask a guy to teach you “That thing you do with your fingers that my wife enjoys so much.”
74. In the middle of sex with your spouse, you ask someone else to take over for a minute while you go to the restroom.
75. You are more concerned about a pimple on your privates than on your face.
76. You come back from vacation and you have a tan, but no tan lines.
77. The first thing you do checking into a hotel is to ask for a lot of extra towels.
78. All the men bring their wives to your bachelor party.
79. Making it an early night means getting home before 3 a.m.
80. You’ve handed out business cards that have nothing to do with your occupation.
81. Your sexual fantasies never last very long… Because they keep coming true!
82. You are hanging around vanilla friends and you absentmindedly squeeze their butts.
83. You erase your computer’s browser history and cache every time you leave your office.
84. You buy lap dances for your wife… And vice versa.
85. You own a double-headed dildo.
86. You’re still smiling on Monday morning about something you did on Saturday night.
87. You’re at the market, and the only things in your basket are condoms, lube and Red Bull.
88. On vacation you set aside time to take pictures that are actually acceptable to show to your family.
89. After 25 years, people still ask if you’re newlyweds.
90. You’ve had sex with more people since you’ve been married than you did when you were single.
91. Going to vanilla bars ranks right up there with a root canal.
92. The only time you go out with your vanilla friends is when you’re on your period.
93. Your husband has lipstick on his collar and he smells like another woman’s perfume and it brings a smile to your face.
94. On Monday morning you are glad to go back to work so you can get some rest.
95. You tell your friends not to call while your parents are in town.
96. You never make it to the drive-thru before they quit serving breakfast, on your way home.
97. You have an entire external hard-drive devoted to nothing but your party photos.
98. You spouse is having an orgasm, while you are busy in the other room discussing the stock market.
99. You spent twice as long on your profile than you did on your resume.
100. You laughed out loud at 25 or more of these

#239: He Can’t Get A Boner


Hi so it’s been a while with preference and I’m really sorry for that. I suffer from insomnia currently and I’m having a hard time trying to break out from it so my sleep is horrible and so is my imagination atm. 

Requested: Yes //  Find my Masterlist here


“I don’t even want to talk about it.” He loudly said once he was out of the bathroom, his eyes wide and cheeks so red in embarrassment he didn’t want to look at himself into the mirror. “Luke come on it was just that one time you can’t let it eat you alive.” You hurried out as well with a towel wrapped around your waist, still having your hair wet and loose because you didn’t have the time with his fast pace. “I said I didn’t want to talk about it!” He yelled dramatically and knocked himself against the bed, his face landing right on top of his pillow to hide his face. “Please just wake me up when my most important body part isn’t backing out right in the last second where it actually has to function.”


“Y/N it’s 3 A.M, go back to bed.” “But I’m horny!” You disagreed, rolling around on the bed so your stomach was resting against the mattress. You had no idea for how long you had been trying but nothing seemed to work on Calum tonight. He had been completely out like a light but no matter how many times you stroked him through his boxers nothing seemed to work. It was as if he had a button he had turned off and plugged out, letting you do something for so many minutes without a progress. “The boner store is closed for tonight. The flag will be hoisted back up tomorrow morning.” You rolled your eyes by his words and heard him let out a deep sigh, taking your hand in his and rolling you around so you didn’t have the opportunity to do anything else but cuddle him for the rest of the night.


”This can’t be happening.” You almost had to hold in everything to not giggle because just by the sight of his face and expression you knew that definitely wasn’t the time for it. “This never fucking happens!” His eyes were wide, jaw falling and with your hands pressed against your mouth to prevent the laughing he rolled his eyes and smacked your thigh. “Y/N this is serious business I never fail! I’m even too shocked to be proper embarrassed.” You took a deep breath to hold everything in and placed your hand on top of his, “Michael it’s okay. I’m sure it happens to a lot of guys-,” “Don’t finish that sentence.” He was quick to scold and you let out a surprised squeal when he suddenly changed his position on your bed and pulled down your panties. “If I can’t any pleasure at least let me give you all I’ve got.”


“You know I’ve been giving you a handjob for fifteen minutes straight, grinned on you almost without panties on and you’re still nothing. I know this might not be the proper thing to ask but is your thing broken?” Your words seemed to be all he needed to laugh, trying to brush of the huge blush that had spread on his cheeks. It wasn’t that you weren’t doing your job right, you had done it so many times on him but it seemed as if nothing was working tonight. “I think it might be the jetlag. I’m sorry hun I know you really want to do something after all these months but I’m too exhausted. Cuddles?” “Fine.” You said with a huff, falling back onto the mattress and leaned your head on top of his arm. “But tomorrow you promise me you’ll fix that little problem of yours.”

Eldritch Mythos 202: Eldritch Energy Work

This particular post within the eldritch series I’ve put off for a long, long while, partially because I’ve been in the process of learning some finer nuances to this topic. This is a messy one, and what I’m writing below I’m tacking on with a warning; please do not approach any sort of eldritch energy work unless you are very well-practiced in cleansing and energy-surgical methods, a confident ability to identify energy parasitism and a 100% understanding that what you’re dicking with, no matter how much you think it likes you? Probably wants to take advantage of you in every way it can.

I’ve encountered a consistent issue in which people are unwilling to acknowledge the problematic natures of the entities they work with. Small, vocal groups may shit on people that have negative experiences, feeding these gross, stagnant mindsets between one another. To be unwilling to discuss and respect these negative experiences within the tags implies to me an insecure practitioner with less respect for physical human beings than the very potentially fake metaphysical entities we’re dealing with. (And if you can’t handle the possibility of all this being fake, what are you even doing?) So by making this post, never, EVER do I EVER want to come across as one of those people, and this isn’t for edge factor, this is about arming both those that WANT to work with this paradigm AND those that have been victimized by it. There are a bunch of people on all sides. Please, if anyone has ever encountered any personal problems, consistent parasitism or hounding I am more than willing to talk in private with you about these issues, as eldritch energy is one of the nastiest, most terrible things you can have sicked on you. I won’t fix it for you, but I’ll tell you everything I have that could help you. I am not going to claim responsibility for any harm that comes your way if you dive half-assed into this though. This post is for those of you out there who haven’t wanted to talk, who’ve been confused and unsure as to what the hell they’re even interacting with.

Now that I’ve slapped my full warning up on here, let’s talk about eldritch energy work. Because hoboy.

Keep reading

Good Girl Ch 44: First Day of Summer


I burry myself deeper into the massive pile of pillows when I hear someone come in. I’m happy where I am, warm, half asleep, and not out of bed at seven in the morning. But that does not seem to matter to my daddies who seemed to have woken up at the crack of dawn for a meeting in the kitchen or something that I was not invited to, not that I wanted to go. I was actually kind of hoping that they would just leave me here when they left, even though I don’t want to be alone, I also don’t want to get up.

It’s the first official day of summer and they for some reason expect me to get out of bed and be ready to go by 8. Though I shouldn’t complain, once we get to the office nothing will actually be expected of me other than to eat breakfast and not get into trouble. But still when someone pulls the covers away from me I can’t help but groan.

“Come on baby,” Chanyeol coos as he gently tugs on my ankle.

“But daddy,” I whine.

“Are you being naughty?” His voice is suddenly an octave lower. I suddenly pop up in bed with a pout on my face. He just chuckles, “So I take it you don’t want to be punished again?” I shake my head, my ass still hurts from two nights ago when I got a little mouthy with Chanyeol and got a couple of spankings in return. I need to remind myself that him, Kris, Xiumin, and Suho are not the one’s to mouth off to. “What do you want to wear? Comfy or stylish?”

I cock a brow at him, “Are you really giving me the option?”

“A pencil skirt it is!” He beams at me pulling an outfit from behind his back.

I glare at him.

“Don’t worry baby, I’ll have a pair of sweat pants in your backpack for you to change into once we get upstairs. Now come on,” He holds a large hand out to me and pulls me to him. I stand up on the bed and begin to bounce happily making the giant smile, “Are you having fun?” I nod.

“I’m finally taller than you,” I grin at him.

“Chanyeol,” Kris scolds, “I thought you were coming to get her ready.”

The shorter of the two giants pouts, “I was trying but she started playing and she’s just too cute to stop.” They both look at me as I continue to bounce around on the giant bed like an idiot.

Kris tries to hide the smile on his face and be a strict daddy, “Joo-ya, you need to get dressed so we can go.” I sigh and stop bouncing right in front of Chanyeol. With my hands on his wide shoulders he helps me into my blush colored skirt and flowing cream top. Kris is carrying matching shoes that he insists that he puts on for me. I don’t put up a fight, I just sit down on the edge and let the tall man slip the cream heels on my feet. He offers me a hand that I quickly accept. We meet the others in the foyer, they are all in neat suits varying in color but they are all unbelievably handsome. They greet me sweetly with kisses and hugs before Kris escorts me to his car.

Tao, Luhan, and Lay join us, they talk on the way, though I’m still a bit tired from my, um, exciting night with Chanyeol. I wish I had taken Luhan up on his offer just to cuddle instead so I could be more excited for them. For most of them this is their first look into how their more legal side of business. We arrive at the building where Kris parks in front only to hand his keys over to one of three neatly dressed valet, or assistant or something. Suho pulls up behind us followed by Chen. I wait for a very crabby Sehun to lead me to the top floor along with everyone else. We step into a familiar lobby that I haven’t been allowed to visit ever since I met Jiyong, though I can’t really blame them since trouble seems to follow me whenever I’m out of their sight. Jinyoung, Jaebum, and Mark are there to greet everyone bowing at a complete 90-degree angle. I wave at them happily.

“Good morning,” They say together.

“Morning,” I greet back happily.

“I’m going to take her down stairs and get her settled, Suho, come along.” Xiumin decides as he takes my hand from the younger boy and pulls me back into the elevator before anyone has the chance to argue, Suho is able to slip in at the last second. The older looks at me with a small smile, “How are you feeling baby?”

I yawn, “Tired, though I shouldn’t be complaining, I’m not the one who has to work all day.” They both chuckle as we step off the elevator, to my surprise we are actually a floor higher. My jaw drops at the massive open room in front of me. The first thing that catches my eye is beyond the floor to ceiling windows on the patio.

“Is that a pool?” I grin excitedly.

“Yes, but those doors will be locked unless one of us is up here with you,” Suho says sternly drawing my attention back to him. “You are able to get snacks from the kitchen but no cooking, Kyungsoo will know if you even try to boil water.” I sigh at the truth in his words, Kyungsoo has weird 6th sense when it comes to me doing anything I’m not supposed be doing. “There is a bedroom threw those doors that you are allowed to sleep in to your hearts content. The universal remote is like the one at home so you already know how to use that. If you feel like changing there is a few extra outfits in the closet in the bedroom along with extra blankets if you get cold.”

I nod as he continues his rules and explanations. My eyes scan over the room finding each thing he is talking about. There is a double set of doors on the wall to my right, which I’m guessing leads to the bedroom and bathroom. In the beautiful kitchen that is in the corner I see a tablet that I’m guessing in the remote along with a basket of snacks that are ready for me. The long dining room table is already set for lunch so there goes the idea of me setting it. Two massive L-shaped couches are in the middle of the room with a soft looking rug on the white marble floor. Everything is light colored, grays, blues, and white with a few splashes of other colors here and there.

“We will come up for lunch everyday so don’t snack around noon. We are just a floor away or you can call or text us if you need anything. Our assistants are also there for a last resort if you need something and we are in a meeting. I’ll post our schedule on the fridge so you can know where we are all the time.”

Xiumin finally chimes in with some annoying news, “If we ever have to go to a meeting at a different building you will be coming along. Even though this place has the best security, I prefer it when you are close by, so no whining about sitting threw meetings with us.”

I sigh but nod.

“Good girl.”

“Also,” Suho clears his throat, “There is one more thing we need to discuss.” He pulls me deeper into the apartment and sits me down on one of the couches, Xiumin sits on my other side. “Jiyong talked about how his building is only a few blocks away and asked if on Tuesdays you could go over after lunch. He said he would bring you home by ten if we agreed, so I was wondering how you would feel about that.”

I shrug, “Sounds fine to me.”

“Of course it does,” Xiumin grumbles.

I turn to face him and take his hands in mine, “Daddy don’t start with this. I’m saying yes because Jiyong is my friend and I want to spend time with him. Jihyo is out of the country the whole summer and you won’t let me hang out with my other friends alone so Jiyong is the only person I have to talk to.”

“So you can’t talk to us?”

“Daddy, you need to stop looking for reasons to be upset. All I’m saying is that you guys can go out and talk to who ever you want. I have all of you guys and I love talking to you guys but sometimes it’s nice to talk to have a friend to talk to about this stuff. So please do not get mad.”

He sighs but nods.

“Good Daddy.”

The next day

“Do we have to let her go?” Chanyeol whines.

“Daddy, don’t you dare start that fight again!” I try to scoot away from the red haired boy but his grip around my waist tightens.

“Fine, I won’t, just finish your lunch before you go.” Chanyeol pulls me back into his lap and pulls my half full plate of pasta closer. I take my fork and begin slowly eating the rest on my plate. By the time I’m done it’s time for them to go back to work and time for me to go meet Jiyong who is meeting me down in the lobby. I wave goodbye to daddies as they load into the elevator when they are gone I go to the bedroom to change out of the nice dress Soo put on me this morning. After pulling on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt I shuffle to the elevator. Down in the lobby I expect to find Jiyong waiting for me but instead I’m greeted by the judging stares of the receptionists. I give them my own glare before walking straight outside, completely ignoring the nagging in the back of my mind that my daddies would kill me for doing such a small thing. Outside I still don’t find Jiyong but instead hear someone whistling at me.

“Yoo who, pretty bird,” A familiar voice calls. I turn around to see my joker smiling at me mischievously. A giant grin spreads on my face as I rush over to greet him.

“Long time no see.”

“Yea, I thought you hated me when I left you my number in that card and you didn’t call or text,” He huffs as she shoves his hands in his pockets.

“Sorry, my oppas are really strict with who I talk to and you would definitely not pass their background check.”

“I take offense to that.”

“I’m also pretty sure I wouldn’t pass it either so don’t feel so special.” He just laughs. “What brings you here?”

“I’m your escort.”

I click my tongue at that, “What is a hitman doing as a babysitter?”

“I’m just a body for hire, regardless of the job, I go where the money is. And I just happen to be so lucky to have the money lead to you,” He grins.

“Okay than escort, lets get going.” He nods and holds his elbow out to me, I laugh but interlock our arms as we wander down the street. “So how did you swing this job? Was is seriously luck of the draw or did you know you would be watching me?”

“The job was offered to my whole team but I was the one to volunteer to do it.”

I nod, “Why?”

He hums mindlessly for a minute, it’s that song again, the one he was humming those four months ago. I find it just as comforting as I did before. “I enjoy you. I have no interest in you sexually, incase you were worried about that, but your attitude is just magnetic to me.”

“I seem to have that effect on people.”

“So this is going to be a weekly thing right? What is this, a custody trade or something?”

I laugh, “Basically, but Jiyong usually picks me up himself. I was a bit surprised to find you. I feel a little offended that he would just hand over my escort to a random hitman he doesn’t even know. No offense.”

“I understand, but don’t underestimate me pretty bird. I’m the best at my job and I always get it done, no matter what.”

“That’s reassuring.”

He smiles down at me, “I like my client to be as relaxed as possible.”

“Don’t say that, I feel like you’re going to kill me or something.”

“Don’t you worry pretty bird, killing you is not on my list.” He stops in his tracks and steps away from me. “Looks like we’re here.”

I look up confused but he’s right we are in front of Jiyong’s building. “Wow that was fast.”

“I know a few short cuts, I’ll remember to take the long way next time so we can talk more, but until then have a good week.” Without another word he turns and leaves. What a strange guy.

I shuffle inside, expecting the same hostile reaction I get from the receptionists at my daddies company but instead they bow deeply at the sight of me. They make me feel like a princess as they basically escort me up stairs to his office where he is sitting behind his desk focused completely on the work in front of him. I smile when he doesn’t even look up from the papers just grumbles something about needing coffee. I don’t fight him on it, I just slip out and ask his handsome assistant where I would get him coffee.

“Oh please let me get it Miss,” He basically begs as I find my way to the little kitchen he has in a hidden room behind his desk.

“It’s fine Mino.”

I brew the coffee quickly with the tall, tan man hanging over my shoulder. When I’m done I bring two cups of coffee with cream and sugar on a tray back to his office. I don’t bother knocking or announcing myself, I just waltz up to Jiyong’s massive desk and set the tray down.

“It’s proper to announce yourself when you enter someone’s office,” He sighs.

“It’s also proper to greet those who enter your office,” I snap back playfully.

He looks up with a big smile, “Beautiful! I didn’t know you were here.” He stands up and greets me properly with a hug. “How was your morning?”

“It was good, I had an exciting lunch with my daddies and a nice talk with my escort.”

He nods, “Let me just gather my things and we can go.”

“Go?” I cock my head, “Don’t you have to work?”

He scoffs, “I have you one day a week and you think I’m going to waste my time with you at work?”

“Where are we going?”

“To have fun.”

In Public - Preferences #1 [Requested] [*Smut]

*More ideas for preferences are welcome! Might add some characters depending on my inspiration * * Gifs and pictures not mine *


You weren’t so sure about going to the theater to see such a violent, terrifying movie but the smile on Scott’s face as he handed you a large bag of popcorn almost changed your mind.
“Why are we here already? Neither of us like horror movies…” You complained, following him between the seats.
He chose two seats in the last rows, there only was a few people sitting in the front rows, the ones who could stand watching an horror movie in 3D…
“Because Stiles keeps talking about it and for once, I would like to talk to him about something not werewolf-related.” He said, his sweet smile appearing back on his face when he looked at you. “Or not about how I feel about you.”
You smiled at him, not believing how easily you melted for him.

You put your 3D glasses on and he planted a kiss on your nose, before putting his and taking a handful of popcorns.

You were only 20 minutes in the movie but you already had to take your glasses off.
“Does it really have to splash everywhere?” You asked out loud, disgusted.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know that it would be so bad” Scott said, laughing.
“It’s okay…” You answered, as he held your hand in his.
You kept watching the screen without your glasses. Although it was blurry, you still jumped everytime someone screamed and closed your eyes everytime you heard the noise of the chainsaw.

You jumped again when you felt something on your knee, crawling underneath your skirt up your tight.
“Relax, it’s just me” Scott whispered, amused by your reaction.
“Scott!” You said out loud once again, when you felt his finger pushing against the fabric of your panties.
“Come on, I’ve always wanted to try this… the movie is bad anyway.”
You looked around. There was only about five people sitting in the front rows and they didn’t even seem to hear you when you talked normally above the noise of screams and chainsaws.
You spread your legs open, inviting him.
He smiled and kissed you, looking like the happiest puppy in the world.
You both made yourself comfortable on your seats, your head resting against his chest while his fingers were massaging you through your panties.
You were close enough for him to catch each one of the deep breaths that you took, hear each sound that escaped your lips, showing him that you liked what he was doing to you.
You moaned as you felt two fingers entering you as far as the fabric would strech, your lips finding his by instinct.
You moaned again against his lips, feeling him kissing you deeper in answer.

You broke the kiss and moved in order to pull your panties down, not caring about the screams or the people surrounding you anymore.
You took your underwear off and tugged it in the front pocket of Scott’s jeans, feeling the hard tent that had formed between his legs.
He kept drawing some figures with his fingers around your clit, and then finally pushed a finger inside you. He moved it, curling it, taking it in and out giving you some pleasure but it wasn’t enough. You were growing eager and eager to have him inside of you and you were about to stop him and ask him to go back to your house to finish but a intense wave of pleasure unexcpectedly shook you, making you arch your back in your seat. You left out a loud moan before suddenly remembering where you were, nobody seemed to notice, except Scott…
“I want you so bad” He mumbled against your lips, his hand leaving you to unzip his jeans.
“We can’t” You managed to whisper, between two kisses, as he pulled his hard dick out of his boxers.
“That’s too late” He answered, leaving his seat to lie on the floor between the two rows of cinema seats.

You looked around, still nobody seemed to notice what you were doing or even aknowledge your presence so you took the hand that Scott was offering you and got on the floor. He held his erection in place for you and, holding your skirt up, you sat on him, biting your lip from the pleasure of finally feeling his perfect size sliding inside of you.
You rocked yourself on him until you felt close, the moans that you couldn’t keep quiet mixing with the sounds of screams from the movie. You both orgasmed at the same time, trying to keep the other quiet by placing your hands on each other’s mouths until you got back to your seats, slightly laughing because everyone was still focused on the movie and no one had noticed you.


“Camping is fun.” Stiles assured you, for the second time since you had left your house. You had packed enough clothes and survival items to survive a month in the wild although you only were spending one night in the woods out of Beacon Hills, with Stiles and his father. Stiles had patiently tried to fit all your bags in the trunk along with his camping equipment, without even complaining or making fun of you. The Stilinski were going camping in the woods, close to the mountains, every summer and they would always go to the exact same spot, near a calm lake. The sheriff had already set up a fire place and his tent when you arrived. Stiles parked his jeep beside his father’s car and immediately got to work, trying to set up the tent you were supposed to share together. You didn’t try to help, knowing that you’d do more bad than good but after a while of watching him struggling with the fabric and the cords, his father decided to help him and set it up by himself. You both watched the sheriff and once the tent was up beside the other one, Stiles looked at you with a proud look, as if he had done that all by himself. You ate around the fire place, enjoying that moment you had with only Stiles and his dad. You didn’t know the sheriff very well, but you were trying to make a good impression, hiding your fear of all the insects flying around as well as you could so that he wouldn’t think that you were having a terrible time. Then, after a while simply gazing at the stars, it was time for you to go to bed. Stiles joined you after a while, waking you up from your half sleep. “We’re going fishing early tomorrow morning, then we’ll eat and we’ll probably go home… Alright with you?” He said, lying down next to you, pulling you against him. “Yes, fine” You answered, giving him a goodnight kiss. He, as per usual, fell asleep quickly and, although you were warm and feeling safe in his embrace, the hours kept going without you being able to fall asleep. “Stiles” You whispered, shaking his arm. “What? My bat is in the trunk…” He jumped, after a few more nudges. “It’s okay… I just can’t sleep.” “Why not ?” He asked, lying back down once he understood that there wasn’t any imminent danger to face. “I think it’s just because I know that bears or mountain lions aren’t the scariest things out there…” You answered. “There’s no need to be afraid, you are with the sheriff and I have a bat, remember?” He said, closing his eyes again. “Yeah, the bat that is in the trunk of your car ?” You sighed ” Don’t you fall asleep Stiles!” “I’m awake” He mumbled, not opening his eyes. “Stiles!” You exclaimed, before remembering that the sheriff was sleeping not that far away from you and covering your mouth. Stiles sighed and got up, shooting you an annoyed glare. “Where are you going?” You asked, getting up too, not wanting to stay alone in the tent. “I’m going to get the bat…” You closely followed him outside, walking by the fireplace to his car. He opened the trunk and you opened the passenger door, sitting on the backseat. “I’ll sleep here” You said, as he closed the trunk with another annoyed sigh. You watched him go back to the tent with the bat and lied down on the seat, feeling slightly safer in the jeep. The door suddenly opened again and you almost screamed in fear, your heart racing in your chest. “I’m not going to leave you alone.” Stiles said, more for himself than for you. “There’s not enough place for both of us!” You complained, as he pushed your legs away to be able to sit and close the door. “Yeah, not like if we had a spacious tent outside!” You stayed in silence for a while, until a laugh escaped your lips, making him smile. He took you in his arms, your head resting against his chest, the sound of his heart calming you down. His fingers were tracing some circles in your back, sometimes entangeling your hair. You buried your face in the crook of his neck, kissing him softly. It took him by suprise when your hands went down to his sweatpants, his body tensing up and his arms leaving you. “My father’s sleeping over there.” He said, shooting a worried look to the tents through the window. “That’s not that different from when I sleep at your house…” You replied, attempting to pull his sweatpants down again. He allowed you to free his dick from his pants, pulling you into a passionate kiss. He helped you remove your pajama pants, pulling your panties down in one move before pulling you over him. You straddled him, feeling his dick finding its way inside you. You slowly rocked your hips together, breathing intensifying as you felt the familiar sensation building in your stomach. You moaned, giving him the signal to go faster. Without any warning, he flipped you over on the seat, laying you down and thrusting in you harder and faster. You allowed yourself to moan louder than usual, quickly imitated by him. You felt your walls clenching around him, making him cum. He pulled out of you and helped you put your pants back on, before pulling you in his embrace, allowing you to finally fall asleep. The dawn seemed to come only minutes after you had fallen asleep, instantly putting you in a bad mood. You tried to fight back but the sun was up and you couldn’t fall back asleep now. Stiles seemed slightly more rested than you. You opened the door to go get some clothes in the trunk, Stiles sleepily walking in the direction of his father, sitting near the fire place. “Hey dad…” Stiles said, stretching. The sheriff didn’t seem very rested either and shot a deadly glare at his son. “Son… In case we ever go camping all together again, know that a car is not much more soundproof than a tent…” A terrified look crossed Stiles’s face and he shamefully nodded. “Good.” The sheriff simply answered, going back to making breakfast.


“Are you sure that you don’t want to change… It’s pretty cold outside.” Isaac asked, for the tenth time, looking at the pair of colored shorts that you were wearing.
“No, I don’t want to change.” You said getting impatient. “Can we go now?”

You could tell that he wasn’t happy that you were wearing some revealing clothes, but he was trying to stay sweet with you and eventually gave in, taking his keys and driving you in town.

It was summer, you both were off from  school and going in town to drink an iced coffee became an habit.

You queued to order your habitual drinks while Isaac went to find a table, it took you a while but you finally got your iced drinks and joined him at the little round table he had chosen. You took a sip but stopped yourself when you realized that your boyfriend was frowning.

“What’s wrong?” You asked.
“I swear these guys were checking you out” He said, in a growl, staring at a group of three guys from your school’s Lacrosse team still queuing.
You placed your hand over his and it seemed to calm him down.
At least until the three guys passed in front of you and one of them turned around to give you a flirty smile.
You didn’t react fast enough and you saw Isaac’s eyes glowing yellow before he stood up and caught the guy by his shirt.

“Isaac!” You exclaimed, getting up too. “Stop!”
“Dude, we got it, she’s yours… it’s okay” One of the guys said to defend his friend.
Everyone in the café was starring at you.
“Isaac…” You cried, already imaging the chaos it would be if he shifted to his wolf form in public.
“That’s right…” He said. “She’s mine.”
He suprinsingly let go of the guy and all three of them left. That’s when he realized everyone was looking at him and he felt embarassed.
“Come” You said, taking his hand in yours, pulling him to the restrooms. “Find you some fresh water.”

He seemed terribly confused. He followed you in the small restroom, looking at himself in the mirror before splashing some cold water on his face.

“I’m so sorry (Y/N)… I just lost it.” He said.
“Don’t be sorry.” You answered, turning him around and closing your arms around his neck. “I liked it, it was hot”
“What?” He asked, with a smile, not believing you.
You answered by pushing your lips against his, kissing him.
“I’ll show you what’s really hot…” He said, with a grin, kissing you harder, his hand finding its way to your ass.
He gently squeezed it, his tongue entering your mouth to battle with yours.
“Maybe you should take those shorts off… Just to avoid more problems.” He said, smiling against your mouth.

You agreed by unbutonning them and he pulled them down, pressing his body against yours as he let you unbutton his pants while eagerly kissing the skin behind your ear.
Your hand entered his boxers, finding his dick and pulling it out. You began sliding both hands up and down on it, making it harder until you earned a werewolfy growl from him.
He pulled your panties down, lifting you up on the sink.
You spread your legs and he pressed his body against yours, entering you.
You could tell that he was already close from your handjob on him, he took himself in and out of you a few times until he released himself inside you. You gently kissed his forehead, entangeling his curls around your fingers until he was ready to start thrusting again. It didn’t take you very long to reach your orgasm, followed by Isaac once your walls had tightened around him, making his eyes shift yellow again.


“No, not this one” Derek said, as you opened the door of the dressing room, showing him the sixth dress you were trying on since you had gotten to the store.
You looked at your reflection in the mirror behind where he was sitting.
“What’s wrong with this one?” You asked, checking your back.
“I can almost see your bra from the opening in the front…” He answered, as if you had asked him silliest question.
“It’s classy…” You observed, but he nodded a categorical no.

You went back in the cabine, trying on another black dress. You knew that Derek was pretty possesive when it came to your body but you had a good feeling about that last dress.
You opened the door and stepped out in front of him. He looked at you as if you wear wearing a plain old jeans until you turned around and showed him the large opening in your back instead of in the front, stopping in your lower back just before your panties.
His eyes seem to grow bigger as he looked at you turning around.
“This is the one.” You said proudly.
“Yup” He agreed, shamlesly staring at your ass.
You let him enjoy the view, enjoying it yourself before getting back in the dressingroom, ready to put your regular clothes back on.

You jumped as the door sudenly opened in your back. Derek entered, shutting it behind him looking at you from your reflection in the mirror.
“What’s wrong?” You asked, alarmed by his behavior.
“Nothing… I just thought that you might need help with the zipper.” He said, admiring your back again.
“Well thanks but the zipper’s on the side.” You answered, smiling at him in the mirror.
“Let me help you…” He said, quietly, slowly pulling the zipper down.

He stepped closer to you, you could feel his warm breath against your skin, carresing its way down your spine through the opening of the dress. His hands slipped under the skirt, resting on your hips as he started leaving kisses on the back of your neck.
You closed your eyes, enjoying that sudden access of sweetness from him.

His hands left your hips, uncovering one shoulder and then the other, kissing each piece of skin that his hands freed from clothing. The dress fell down to the ground and you were left in your underwears, a tender Derek leaving kisses all over your body.
“You’re beautiful” He said, in a breath, his hands running down your waist. “Whatever you wear…”
You turned around and his clear blue eyes starred into yours with an emotion that you couldn’t really discribe.
You softly kissed his lips as he held you tightly against him.
He kissed back and you felt the kiss getting deeper, more impatient.
You turned around again and he gently pushed you against the mirror, repeating the same gesture than before, placing kisses on the exact same spots. He unzipped his jeans, you couldn’t see but you soon felt his hard tip pressing against you.
His thumb went in your panties, pulling it to one side to open the access to your entrance.
The first thrust was always sudden with him, it always hurt you when he entered you, that’s why he was doing it all at once, like if he was taking a bandaid off your skin.

He placed his hands on your hips, guiding you to a slow rythym, gently sliding his lenghth inside you. You left out a sigh once the pain seemed like it had faded away, starting to enjoy it, glad that there wasn’t that many people around in the store and that no one was bothering you to quickly try your clothes on.

His pace increased and you were breathing heavily, your warm breath leaving traces on the mirror as pleasure started growing.
You felt your body tensing up, ready for him to cum and that’s exactly what he did, as if he had been waiting for permission. The werewolf that he was wasn’t panting as much as you did, he pulled out of you , his eyes meeting yours in the mirror.
“I’ll wait outside” He said, leaving you in the dressing room, panting and confused, wondering what got into him sometimes.

Talk to Me (Snowbaz)

Eight year AU

In which Simon is trying to come up with a new spell but he ends up speaking only German

This is for @mitsouparker because she deserves to smile :)


I’m alone in the room. I think Baz is in the library. He always goes there after classes to do his homework. I prefer doing it in our room. Or not doing it at all.

We have to come up with a new spell for Magic Words class, so I try transfiguring a book into food. That would be a huge improvement to the World of Mages. At least for me.

I take out my wand and point at the book. Then, I say with magic, “Like a Bratwurst!

I wait for thirty seconds, but the book remains the same.

Scheiße,” I say, but I don’t understand myself. I wanted to say Shit.

Scheiße,” I try again. Fuck, I think I’ve spelled myself instead. “Fantastisch.”

I’d better go find Penny.

“Penny!” I shout when I find her at last, “Hilf mir!”


“Penny, ich brauche deine hilfe, ich hab’s verbockt,” I continue.

“What in Morgana’s name are you saying, Simon?”

Right. She doesn’t speak German. Because I’m speaking German, no? Agh, I don’t even know.

I try to explain her the situation through mime and stupid drawings.

After half an hour of me making idiotic gestures—Baz would love to make fun of me right now if he were here—Penelope finally understands.

“So you can only speak German?” she asks.


“But you’ve never learnt it.”

Merlin, ich weiß, Penny!” I protest.

“Okay, calm down,” she says. “Let me think this through and see if I can come up with a reversing spell. Go to your room and don’t do anything. Just… rest. I’ll come later, okay?”


When I arrive to our room, Baz is in there, too. In the shower. Great. He’ll tease the hell out of me.

I lie down on my bed and decide not to think about it—about anything—when Baz steps out of the bathroom.

Merlin, du siehst klasse aus!” I say. Fuck, where did that come from?

Baz looks at me nonplussed, almost dropping the towel he’s holding. He’s only wearing pants. “What the fuck, Snow?”

Ich meine… uhm… deine Bauchmuskeln…” I don’t know what I’m saying, I just can’t stop looking at his abs. “Ich mag sie.”

He must notice me staring because he puts a shirt on and looks away.

“What’s wrong with you?” he asks.

Ich denke, ich mag dich… das ist das Problem.

Baz looks intensely at me for a moment. He hesitates for a second, as if deciding something, before walking the two steps that separate us and stopping right beside my bed.

I sit up. We are so close now.

Ich liebe dich,” he says. And what a beautiful sound that is.

I place a hand on his nape and pull him towards me. I just want to taste his words with my lips. So I kiss him. And he kisses me back. We kiss for a long while before the two of us are panting.

“So, you speak German? Since when?” I ask him.

“Yes, I learned it last summer,” he says, his fingers playing with my curls.

“So you understood everything?”

“Yeah, Snow, everything.” He looks at me with lustful eyes. Merlin, he’s made of trouble. He takes my hand and places it on his stomach. “I didn’t know you liked my abs, you should’ve told me before.”

“I… uhm… I didn’t know either.”

“Wait, Snow,” he looks surprised. “You’re speaking English again.”

“Oh,” I say. “That’s right. I guess a true love’s kiss broke the spell?”

“Don’t be stupid, Snow. This isn’t a fairtale.”

“It feels like one, right now,” I say, looking into his eyes.

“Oh, shut up,” he replies, trying to hide a smile.

“Make me.”

“Merlin and Morgana guys, hang a sign on the door!”

“Uhm, sorry, Penny.” I blush. This is so awkward.

“It’s okay, it actually makes a lot of sense. But please, don’t let me run into you two like this ever again.”

“Okay,” I smile sheepishly.

“I see  you broke the spell,” she adds after a while.

“Yeah… true love’s kiss?”

She bursts out laughing. “Fairy tales aren’t real, Simon,” she says. “I guess Baz spoke to you in German, right?”

I nod.

“I’ll leave you two alone, then. And remember, door sign,” she says before leaving the room.

“What was that?” I ask Baz after a while.


“What you said… what does it mean?”

“Oh. Nothing.”

“Baz, what does it mean?”

He mumbles something I don’t understand.

“Just say it,” I tell him.

“I love you,” he says. And I kiss his lips before he finishes.

“I love how that tastes. Say it again.”

“I love…”

“I love you too,” I say, lips clashing against his.

Ich liebe dich.


Translation of phrases:

Hilf mir! = Help me!

ich brauche deine hilfe, ich hab’s verbockt = I need your help, I’ve fucked up

ich weiß = I know

du siehst klasse aus! = you look good!

Ich meine… deine Bauchmuskeln… Ich mag sie = I mean… your abs… I like them

Ich denke, ich mag dich… das ist das Problem = I think I like you, that’s the problem

Ich liebe dich = I love you

Ari: Hey, I hope you liked this silly mini-ficlet or at least that it made you smile :)

Sorry for my crappy German D: