pound of bacon

I Trained Crows To Bring Me Quarters

By reddit user LeoDuhVinci

In college, I struggled to make ends meet.  Most of my meals consisted nearly entirely of ramen noodles, garnished with a scrambled egg if my finances were stronger than usual, combined with the weekly splurge of a candy bar and soda each Friday.  I worked a part time job, but city rent was expensive, my classes were too tough to work more than twenty hours a week, and my parents had cut me off the year before.

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Birthday Girl

Chris Evans/Reader 

A/N: so this is my first request, it’s for the lovely, @captainhallow  I hope you enjoy it Madi! Sorry if it’s kind of all over the place

Request: hi! It’s my birthday, so i was wondering if you’d do a fluffy birthday/easter fic with Chris Evans? Thanks <3        

Originally posted by capsteverogers-things

“Wake up, wake up!” Chris says cheerily while shaking me awake.

“Already?” I whine while rolling to face him. “What time is it?”

“Time for you to get ready, birthday girl. I’m going to go make you breakfast” He tells me with a peck on the cheek. 

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National Best Friends Day

Fandom- The Outsiders. (Entire group, nobody specifically.)

Warnings- None. Not a very long fic.

Note- Requests are open. I also mention Gordon Ramsay, but ignore it if it bothers you.

~~~

  Light was pouring through the cracked curtains of the room. A golden color was beaming right across Pony’s eyes. The warm and comforting smell of coffee beans wafted through the house. Other scents, those of food, weren’t as prominent as the coffee. Pony rolled away from the bright sunlight and tried to open his eyes. Was Soda cooking or was Darry? Nobody had to get up early on the Saturday morning, but it seemed like someone had.

  Pony caught a glimpse of Soda’s face. The golden sunlight turned his hair a wheat gold and his skin looked sun-kissed. His jaw had some stubble across it, which caused it to make his jaw line jut out. His hair was sticking up everywhere and was extremely fluffy. Soda would have looked like a god if there wasn’t drool running out of his mouth and down his chin.

  Pony tried to contain his laughter as he noticed dried drool in other places on his face. Pony glanced at the clock on the wall. It read ‘11:30’. Pony sighed and closed his eyes. Ten more minutes wouldn’t kill anyone.

  Pony had drifted off again when something big landed on him. Pony’s eyes snapped open to see Steve, Soda’s best friend, laying across him and Soda. Soda was still sleeping and Pony was glaring angrily at the Steve. Steve didn’t have cake on his face, which was weird. Steve always had cake on his face when he was at the Curtis house. Pony muttered angrily to himself about being woken up as he pushed Steve’s legs off his body.

  Pony grabbed a pair of pants off the floor and didn’t bother trying to find a shirt. He could have cared, but he didn’t. Pony yawned and ruffled his own hair as he walked out of his room. The three brothers had taken showers before going to sleep for the night, so they had grease-less hair. The Curtis brothers had very fluffy hair without grease, and it was a lot more unruly than you’d think.

  The jeans Ponyboy had grabbed off the floor must not have been his, since they were barely hanging on his hips and covered the tops of his feet. He wasn’t fully awake yet, so that didn’t exactly bug him. He got excited when he heard the sounds of food being cooked in the kitchen. Darry must have been up.

  Pony caught sight of Two-Bit sitting in the middle of a spot-less living room. He was trying to balance his converse on the top of an old beer bottle. The floor’s were spotless and the rugs didn’t have a speck of dirt on them.

  Pony rubbed his eyes and looked again. Yeah, the floor and rugs were clean. Pony looked around the room to see the pictures, shelves, and table had been dusted and looked way to clean for comfort.

  Something rattled in the kitchen and Pony’s gaze snapped in there. Dallas Tucker Winston was standing next to the stove cook breakfast. The juvenal delinquent was stirring pots, flipping pancakes, putting bacon on a plate. Pony saw a familiar head of dark hair and he noticed Johnny standing at the sink and washing the left over dishes from the day before.

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  • Bel: Hey, I've been watching cartoons downstairs and haven't been grocery shopping in a while, could you make me dinner?
  • Fran: I got stuff for stir-fry.
  • Bel: What else is on the menu?
  • Fran: Searched the fridge, found some "go fuck yourself" in the back.
  • Bel: Sounds fattening.
  • Fran: I heard it's a pretty lean meal. And thin. Also, flaccid.
  • Bel: I don't like your customer service, I'm taking my business elsewhere. Captain, can you bring me food?
  • Squalo: I have whiskey and a half-pound of bacon. I don't live well.
  • Bel, several minutes later: I walked to Chick-fil-A. WALKED. Like a PEASANT.
  • Fran: Actually, Chick-fil-A sounds pretty good right now.
  • Squalo: Voi, will you bring Chick-fil-A to me?
  • Fran: Yeah, the Captain and I need two Number Ones.
  • Bel: You want me to take a shit on your doorsteps. Got it.
  • Fran: No, that would be a number two.
{fic} Bright-Eyed and Bushy-Tailed (part 2)

Word Count:  2.5k
Relationship:  Lucien/Cassian
Characters:  Lucien, Cassian, Rhysand, Feyre
Warnings:  Depression, PTSD, also just a lot of regular Sadness, Abuse

Here on AO3.

__________________

Cassian had made Lucien exchange cell numbers with him before Feysand got back. So far he was very nearly regretting it – despite Lucien’s obvious skill as a photographer, he kept sending Cassian blurry pictures of guys lifting weights at the gym with the caption is this u.

But finally, Cassian had a chance to use number as he’d intended.

When should I pick u up? he texted to Lucien bright and early Monday morning.

id hopd ud forgotten about that he got back five minutes later. He was surprised Lucien had responded so fast – he’d expected him to be asleep, as any sensible person should be at the god-awful hour at which Cassian awoke.

Nope, sorry. What time?

He was still waiting for Lucien’s reply when his 6am Tai Chi class started to trickle in, so he put his phone in his bag. Once he’d waved all the businesspeople too hipster to do yoga out the door nearly an hour later, he grabbed it again, expecting a text from a few minutes after his own. Cassian frowned when there was no message notification on his phone. He decided to give Lucien the benefit of the doubt. For now.

But by eleven he was done with that nonsense.

If u don’t tell me what time 2 pick u up I’m going 2 come and park outside ur house.

He grinned as his phone pinged not five minutes later:  come by at 1 tmrw. u suk.

Cassian grinned. ;) See u at 1.


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5

Meet the burrito-filled bacon pizza burrito. Yes, that’s right: Some gluttonous/stoned genius managed to wrap two pounds of bacon and three chipotle burritos within a large cheese pizza. The pizza burrito then is topped with more cheese and baked to form the most insane munchie of all time.

Oh my, Darling~

Do you hear that? It couldn’t be! Your tummy is grumbling! You must be starving! I can’t have that now, not in this kitchen. Have some chips dear, I’ll make you a sandwich. How does a grilled cheese with bacon and extra cheese sound? How about I fry up the whole pound of bacon and let you eat it while you wait. A hungry feedee, impossible- you should be stuffed at all times! When you’re done with your buttery sandwich, I have cheesecake for dessert. But you’ ve got to eat all of your vegetables, and potato chips certainly count as vegetables, they’re made of potatoes after all. I want you to finish the whole bag of chips, then you can stuff your face with this cheesecake! It’s dripping with strawberry pie filling and melted chocolate, two of my favorite deliciously sweet things. I’m not sure you can finish such a rich dessert,

but then again, you are SO hungry~

anonymous asked:

Do you know who it was in this tag that made bacon last week? and they were like their ritual worked bc Dem won? Ima need for them to repeat it lol Ikas in danger fr

That was the good sis @spunkyspy and I’m gonna buy her a pound of bacon tomorrow if means Ika wins HOH.

6

Dragging your ass out of bed through a rougher-than-usual commute to get to your surprisingly cancelled 9am class can be forgiven when it leads to discovering gems such as La Bonbonniere.

Tucked away in the West Village, this fairly priced, delicious, cash only, “no bullshit” paradise was just the safe haven go-to we needed from school. Editing to the menus is done by hand written sticky notes, not re-printing.  The only decorations on the walls are approvals by a ton of famous people and numerous awards the diner has won, deservingly so. Most of the time, no pretty much ALL of the time, I don’t want a “razzle dazzle” tacky-ass “retro” or chic overpriced NYC diner. I want a DELICIOUS stack of fresh pancakes that come with a pound of bacon on top that doesn’t cost $80. Thanks for being there for us, La Bonbonniere. We love you.

Cafe AU: Part 3

Fic Summary: Leorio has has absolutely no luck with jobs… which isn’t a very good thing when you’re a medical student living in a bustling, money hungry city like Zaban.

But things take a turn when he lands a job at a unique little café around the corner from his student apartment, where he meets three misfit kids and a very high maintenance boss, whose stuck up demeanour hides a colourful past…Leorio’s world changes forever when he joins this strange little family.

Expect cakes, chaos and curiosity.

Part 3… finally! Read the content warnings and other ships included in this fic, plus part 1 of the story here. If you missed part 2, it’s here

(Thanks again to jillua for being my beta reader, and for painstakingly somewhat Americanising this hell for me)

Thank you for all the support on Part 1 and 2, I hope this chapter goes down as well as the others! Again, if you enjoyed this please rebagel it. It would mean so much to me if you did <3 thanks again



Sunday: 8:30am

Leorio lay in his bed for god knows how long, idly watching the way the sunlight leaked through the blinds and cast lines across the grey carpet. A car horn sounded outside, and somewhere in the distance there were sirens. The constant noise of the city had kept Leorio awake when he first moved here, but now it only comforted him; it certainly wasn’t the reason he’d woken up so early this particular morning.

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3

Hannibal Cookbook:

  • Title: Beef Roulades with Walnut Parsley Pesto
  • Episode: 2x6 Futamono

Information:

  • Yield: 4-6 servings
  • There are multiple hannibal entries for each recipe in the show. Check out my ‘hannibal cookbook’ tag for more.
  • Image and recipe source are the same.

Recipe:

Note: You can use prosciutto instead of the bacon (no need to cook, it’s already cured), or skip it all together and just do a roll-up with the pesto of your choice.

Ingredients: 

Pesto:

  • 1 cup chopped parsley
  • ½ cup shelled walnuts, about 1 ¾ ounces
  • ¼ cup grated parmesan or pecorino cheese
  • 2 garlic cloves, roughly chopped
  • ¼ teaspoon salt
  • ¼ cup olive oil

Flank steak roulade:

  • ½ pound thin-cut bacon
  • 1 ½ to 1 ¾ pounds flank steak
  • Salt and black pepper
  • Lemon wedges to serve

Directions:

  • Start by making the pesto. Put the parsley, cheese, garlic, salt and walnuts into a food processor. Pulse to combine. Turn the machine on again and slowly pour in the olive oil, just to combine. Reserve.
  • Cook the bacon in a large pan — you will be searing the roulade in this later, so it needs to be wide — over medium-low heat until it is about half-cooked. You want it cooked, but still limp. Do not crisp it up or it will break when you try to wrap it inside the roulade. When the bacon is ready, set it aside on paper towels.
  • Place heavy duty plastic wrap (or two layers of plastic wrap) on a large work surface and place the flank steak on it. Cover with more plastic wrap. Using a rubber mallet, the flat side of a meat mallet or an empty wine bottle, pound the flank steak until it is ½ inch thick or thinner. Flip the meat from time to time to pound everything evenly. Once the meat is as thin as you want it, if you have a meat mallet with a tenderizing side (the pointy side), remove the plastic wrap and pound this on both sides for a minute or two. If you don’t have a meat mallet, you can skip this step.

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  • Look at your steak: You will be rolling it up with the grain of the meat facing side to side. You do this because when you slice it later, the beef will be more tender when you cut across the grain. Arrange the meat until the grain faces side to side, and if it is not squarish or rectangular, cut it to fit. Sprinkle on some salt and black pepper.

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  • Spread a thin layer of pesto on the meat, leaving about ½ inch free on all sides of the meat. Lay down the bacon against the grain of the beef. Preheat the oven to 350°F.

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  • Carefully roll  the roulade up tightly, as you would a carpet. If you want, cut off any bacon that is extending beyond the steak. Tie off the meat with 6 to 8 lengths of string, each about an inch or so apart. Sear the tied roulade in the pan with the bacon fat. You want to quickly brown the surface, not cook the inside of the roulade.

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  • Put the roulade in a roasting pan on a rack, seam side down. If you don’t have a rack, improvise with celery stalks. Roast this for 20-25 minutes, or until the interior of the meat is 130°F. (Note that the ends of the roulade will be far hotter than the center — so always test the temperature from the center of the roulade.)
  • Remove the meat from the oven and let it rest for 10 minutes before slicing. Slice the roulade so each serving is wrapped in string. You can either let everyone cut their own string at the table, or cut it yourself and secure the roulades with toothpicks if you want. Serve with lemon wedges to add a little tartness to the dish.

*Hannibal gifs from this photoset:  http://halinacrown.co.vu/post/81890131021/food-per-episode-2x6-futamono

3

The seasons influence what we eat. In the spring and summer, when sugar snap peas, string beans, raspberries, tomatoes, radishes, lettuce or squash from the garden is abundant, we eat what we grow. We eat it until sometimes I can barely face another meal of whatever is in season. If we truly can’t keep up with the harvest, the surplus will get frozen, to be pulled out and thoroughly enjoyed months later.

At this time of year, I have a hard time buying some out-of-season vegetables that we grow in the summer – it just feels wrong. I usually will turn to a can of diced tomatoes rather than the pale, stiff “fresh” ones in produce. The green beans look okay, but I rarely leave with a bag of them. Snap peas in the bins look pale and limp. Sometimes I will give in and bring home a packet or two of fresh herbs, even though they’re expensive.

The good news is that at this time of year I rarely need to buy summer vegetables. The soups I fix are usually hearty, made with beans or barley, and simmered with braised meats or a ham bone. I like to use butternut squash, potatoes, onions, carrots and parsnips. The slow cooker comes out and meals bubble away on the countertop for hours. Citrus fruits are at their peak in the grocery stores now, so we’re eating pink grapefruit, tangerines, and oranges.

I found this recipe the other day and decided to give it a test drive. It turned out remarkably good! It’s not as heavy as a typical bean soup – it felt light, but still filled us up and seemed perfect for a January evening. The recipe didn’t call for it, but I think topping a bowl of this hot soup with a little grated Parmesan cheese would be a great addition. I made cornbread to go along with it – a meal we will repeat with leftovers tomorrow.

White bean soup with fresh herbs and crispy bacon – a recipe modified from Food & Wine. (Recipe can be doubled.)

Ingredients:

  • ½ pound Great Northern beans
  • ½ pound thick-sliced bacon, cut crosswise into ¼-inch strips
  • 2 tablespoons reserved bacon drippings
  • ½ Spanish onion, finely chopped
  • 1 large carrot, finely diced
  • 1 celery ribs, finely diced
  • 2 garlic cloves, minced
  • 1 small fresh bay leaf
  • 1 teaspoon chopped thyme
  • 1 teaspoon chopped rosemary
  • 5 cups chicken stock
  • Salt and freshly ground pepper

Directions:

Pour beans into a colander and pick through them carefully. Rinse. Put rinsed beans in a large sauce pan and cover with two inches of water. Bring beans to a boil and take off heat. Cover and let sit off heat for one hour.

In a large soup pot or Dutch oven, cook the bacon over moderate heat, stirring, until browned and crisp, about 7 minutes. Drain the bacon bits on paper towels. Pour the bacon drippings into a small bowl and wipe out the pan.

Return 2 tablespoons of the drippings to the pan and heat over medium heat.

Add the onion, carrot and celery and cook over moderate heat, stirring occasionally, until the vegetables are softened, about 8 minutes. Stir in the garlic, bay leaf and ½ teaspoon of the thyme and all of the rosemary, and cook until fragrant, about 2 minutes. Add the drained beans and stock and bring to a boil. Simmer the soup over moderately low heat until the beans are tender, about 1 ½ hours.

Discard the bay leaf and stir in the remaining thyme. Season the soup with salt and pepper. Garnish the soup with the bacon bits and serve.

MAKE AHEAD The soup and bacon can be refrigerated separately for up to 3 days. Recrisp the bacon before serving.

2

Happy Saturday❥

Not Much going on in our house today, I feel as if the girls know its the weekend lol, I woke up to Eleanor down the hallway in her crib screaming “AMAH! OWW” lol oww for “out” and it was like 6:40 Am shes never up this early shes a sleeper for sure, she could sleep all day, n i pray the new baby likes to sleep too lol but back to my morning, I made like 2 pounds of bacon, pancakes and eggs and they ate and instantly went to play, and here it is 8:07 and they are already into 2 bumps and bruises lol sisters eh? also I never posed the photos of the photos we took earlier this week and ill post those later today, happy Saturday everyone!

5

Treat that Trick

Dear Maya
November already! I have my fall candles burning. One smells like pumpkin pecan waffles and another like spiced apples but my favorite is leather and vanilla. It was a Halloween treat from my husband. He said it was better than giving me candy (I did trick him and hide some candy from the stash we had for the goblins and super heroes and princesses who came to our door!) I love those wonderful smells of autumn - especially the crisp evenings. We rent a house near Marfa and spend a few days out there every October. At night we light fires in the chiminea and the air fills with pinion smoke. That smell always reminds me of West TX. I believe certain smells stir up memories. The smell of bacon and coffee reminds me of childhood. That smell would waft across the sleeping porch of our family’s summer house up on the river. It makes me hungry just thinking about it. Paris has a certain smell. It’s hard to describe but it’s a mixture of tobacco and fresh croissants and old buildings! Our favorite girl is in Paris right now! She’s back to being a brunette. That’s my favorite look even though she is beautiful no matter what!

R: hey gorgeous. Trick or treat

K: Halloween’s over dude

R: Try explaining that to someone who insists on wearing her piglet costume for the 3rd day in a row!

K: but she looks sooooo fucking adorable. And she loved matching her fav uncle

R: true but I doubt he is still walking around like some wanna be bacon

K: HAHA wanna be bacon? I seriously doubt pigs walk around thinking “man I can’t wait to be bacon”

R: But being bacon is the best! I think there may be pigs who wanna be bacon but they just roll around in mud and are never chosen

K: just cuz they wanna be doesn’t mean they will be. Not every pig is good enough for bacon.

R: No room for mediocre in the prime bacon business. I do love your bacon. You make the best

K: Dude! you can eat a whole pound of bacon. It’s really not good for you

R: You’re good for me. I can eat you instead

K: STFU!

R: You’re gorgeous

K: You’re biased

R: Knock knock

K: this again?

R: just play along. Knock knock

K: ugh. WHO’S THERE?

R: bacon

K: bacon who?

R: you’re bacon me hard

K: LOL!!! you’re bacon me crazy

R: I love you more than bacon

K: really?

R: really

K: that’s a lot

R: you bet your fine ass it is. And you smell good too

K: are you saying I smell like bacon?

R: no. you smell like you

K: and what do I smell like?

R: you smell like home. You smell like love.

K: awwwwwwwwwwwww. You smell like love too. That’s why I like wearing your clothes

R: you’re bacon me harder

K: then come upstairs and I’ll see what I can do about it. That is…………….if you have “permission”
LOLZZZZZ sorry. #Not sorry!

R: I am so fucking tired of this. It never ends.

K: how ‘bout I give you permission to have your way with me. That better?

R: You’re just like bacon. You make everything better

K: hey. I love you.

R: hey. I love you more

So sweet Maya
All this is making me hungry. I think I’ll go find a treat. Tricksters never win no matter how hard they try.
But success is the ultimate treat for those who work hard. Hard work deserves recognition.
Success is like bacon- it’s the very best. It’s going to be OK

Breakfast 101

This spiraled out of a conversation I had with @justanotherwannabeclassic earlier this week and my constant desire for more Captain Charming, Captain Cobra, and all the Captain Swan domestic fluff.  I swear all key portions were actually written before 6.04 aired and I got to see both the Daddy Charming pancake extravaganza and the Regina/Rumple “It brings out your eyes” line.  I’m publishing this fic only five hours after having seen that episode, and I promise you I am not capable of writing anything this long in that short amount of time.  Apparently I’m just clairvoyant.  :)  Also, apparently, judging by my last few fics, I have an obsession with CS fluff, lazy mornings, and breakfast food (the latter of which is news to me).  I hope you enjoy.

Find it on AO3.

Summary: Killian turns to Charming to give him a lesson in modern-day cooking.  (Captain Swan/Captain Cobra/Captain Charming one-shot, CS fluff, rated M-ish)




The clack of wood on wood echoes in the front yard of the gray Queen Anne-style house, punctuated here and there by Henry’s grunts of effort and the rumble of Killian’s appreciative chuckles or his occasional call of instruction.

“Wrist up, lad.”

“Nicely done!”

“Watch your stance.”

As it always does, a smile graces Killian’s face as he and Henry circle around one another, shifting back and forth across the grass, the autumn leaves crunching beneath their feet as they face off with practice swords, exchanging sets of blows and then breaking apart again and again and again.  He’s always loved teaching the art of swordplay, and while young Henry is still nowhere near a match for the infamous Captain Hook, the boy is coming along well in his lessons, progressing even faster than his father did at that age. These times with Henry always cause Killian to flash back to bittersweet memories of giving Bae similar instruction ages ago aboard the decks of the Jolly Roger, but Henry always pulls him back to the present before too long with a ready ear-to-ear grin and his next attack, the boy perpetually optimistic that this might be the time he catches the old man off guard.

Up on the porch, the front door cracks open, and Emma’s face appears, her hand wrapping around the door jamb.  “Alright, pirates!  Soup’s on!” she hollers cheerfully, her eyes dancing at the sight of her favorite men having a good time together.  “Time to disarm!”

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anonymous asked:

ohh can i ask for headcanons for how Lucio, Solider76, and Mei celebrate their s/o's birthday? thank u!

I’ll do this with pleasure, but I want to die because I was about 2 sentences from finishing this and Tumblr crashed and rebooted, erasing my answer, I hate Tumblr 


Lucio: 

- He wakes you up with kisses all over your face, and breakfast in bed, your favorite breakfast, of course he also sings you “Happy Birthday” but in his very own style

- He’ll let you to get dressed, but when you come out of the room there is this H U G E bouque of your favorite foowers, with a note that simply has a smiley face, because Lucio is super  happy about being your boyfriend and he can’t believe that he gets to spend your birthday with you

- If you’re into big parties he’ll throw you the biggest party there could ever e, he wants you to have the most amazing, faabulous party of the century, he’ll DJ for a while, but he’ll spend most of the party with you cause he loves you

- OR! He’ll organize a fancy dinner at your favorite restaurant, he’ll wear a tuxedo and he’ll slow dance with you, whispering how much he loves you, and by the end of the night he’ll just say “Happy birthday, baby”

- OR! If you prefer, you’ll stay at home, watch our favorite movies and eat your favorite snacks! (he just wants you to be happy)

- He’ll give you presents all day long! (a bracelet, books, special candy, a super special mixtape that he made just for you) but at the end of the day he gives you the “main” present


Soldier 76: 

- He wakes up super happy!! He can’t believe that he is lucky enough to wake up next to you on the day of your birthday! WOW! He hugs you tightly and kisses your neck, waking you up with a smile 

- He’ll carry you to the kitchen, place you on the counter and he would cook anything you want for breakfast! you want pancakes?? Hell yeah! It’s your birthday, after all! You want a pound of bacon? Sure! 

- You stay in the house all day! You watch all your favorite movies and he spends all day kissing you and telling you how much he loves you (he gets all your favorite snacks, even if he has to bite his tongue cause he’s always insisting that you eat healthy, but it’s your birthday and he can not resist spoiling you)

- He couldn’t decide on what to give you, so he just gets a bunch of stuff he knows you’ll love, raging from books and clothes to illegal candy


Mei:

- She wakes you up with breakfast in bed and a kiss, you pull her down to the bed with you, it’s your birthday dammit! You want to spend it with your favorite person in the word!

- She bakes you pie! Your favorite type of pie! And it is delicious! She decides that your birthday is her day to spoil you 100% 

- In the morning she’ll give you a necklace that has a tiny snowflake inside a diamond shaped clear crystal, then, at lunch she gives you the matching ring and then at night she’ll give you the matching bracelet 

- She takes you out on a picnic! She made all the food by herself and she made all of your favorite meals so you could enjoy them together 


( I hope you like it! And I’m sorry if it is a little short, I haven’t been my best lately)