potty train

@allthesycophants @awookieinsheepsclothing I was in a pub garden with some friends and their three year old yesterday evening, and when his parents were too exhausted to go on the climbing frame with him, I went and played with him. He spent like … half an hour running me round in circles, making me be a pirate and running away from an octopus. It was BRILLIANT.

Then he grabbed my hand and said he needed to go to the toilet. And he’s potty training. So I took him back to his dad and told him “your son needs the toilet” and I went and sat back down without waiting for a response. 😁

3

A cashier tried to convince this little girl to get a white doll. She said no.

  • As a prize for a month of successful potty-training, two-year-old Sophia Benner picked out a doll she loved at a local Target — but when she and her mother got to the checkout, a cashier tried to talk her out of her purchase because Sophia is white, and the doll she picked out was black. Sophia’s mother, Brandi Benner, described the incident in an Instagram post on Saturday.
  • Benner wrote that she was about to respond to the cashier when her daughter jumped in with a succinct, and perfect, explanation. “I immediately became angry, but before I could say anything, Sophia responded with, ‘Yes, she does. She’s a doctor like I’m a doctor. And I’m a pretty girl and she’s a pretty girl. See her pretty hair? And see her stethoscope?” Read more. (4/4/2017 1:15 PM)

My Puppy

Originally posted by rapnamu

Pairing: Taehyung X Reader-First Person View

Genre & Warnings: SMUT, fluff, pet play. 

Word Count: 4,406

NOTE: Pure Filth. Turn back now if you don’t want to see. Turning Tae Tae into my Fuck Puppy (Thanks Anon). Soft femdom. Let me tell you, it was an EXPERIENCE writing this, and I am still not perfectly pleased with it. Mostly because I’m never happy with my own smut writing. I had to do so much research, so google probably thinks I’m freaky naughty af. Which I suppose I am considering I wrote this lol. So, for those that are hardcore into this and think I didn’t portray it well enough, I’m sorry, I tried. And I learned quite a bit about myself, like the fact that if I ever get my hands on someone like Tae, I am so going to try this. Now enjoy, and excuse me as I go drench myself in holy water to cleanse myself of sin. 


“You know, I hate the winter. It reminds me of your cold heart.”

My now ex-boyfriend mutters this line, looking into the snowy sky. He sighs loudly and saunters off, without looking back. What a fucking drama queen. I can’t help but snort as I watch him disappear into the light snowfall, and wonder what movie he got that line from.

Cold heart.

I don’t have a cold heart. He was just a damn bore. He never wanted to do anything but watch movies, and freaked out if I suggested anything besides missionary. I’ve been thinking about breaking up with him for weeks now, but was putting it off because I knew he’d cry. This saved me all the hassle.

Note to self: Don’t date actors.

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Guess the Breed(s)

This is Leo! He’s a four month old pup who’s about 10 pounds at the moment and a foot and a half long (excluding tail). Leo loves playing with his big brother Collin, and has a lot of energy. He loves being cuddled and given attention, and was relatively easy to potty train+teach tricks.

The Nanny

A/N: I know, a new series. But I just needed a new idea. Anyways this is the first part to what I’m hoping to be a 6 part series. Let me know what you guys think

Word count: 2,000 something words

Warnings: Mentions of a house fire, minor death not graphic

“Looking for a full time Nanny. Must be able to work late and be able to take care of both a kid and a dog. I am willing to provide a room for you to sleep in. In interested please Email me your resume at jbbarnes6412@gmail.com

Thank you,
J. Barnes”

As you read what seemed like the millionth job ad, you copied the listed email address into the empty email box.

Dear Mr. Barnes,
Below I have attached my resume. I hope I am a good fit for what you are looking for. My hours are flexible and I love dogs almost as much as I love kids.

Sincerely,
Y/N Y/L/N

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Never Would Have

Requests: “Could you do an imagine where the reader is also a witch and with Kai. Just after he died the reader found out she was pregnant. She had twins (whatever genders). When Kai came back in the latest episode, Damon calls her to tell her that he’s back when him and Kai are in the car and Kai hears the twins in the background (maybe they call her mom or something and he knows she’s their mother). Then the reader brings the twins to see him? Thanks xx” (Credits to gif owners!)

“You guys be good, Damon is calling.” Y/N gave a stern look to her son who was about to tackle his sister. The twins stopped, nodded and sat on the floor together to watch cartoons. The ringing phone reminded Y/N that she had to answer soon or else it would go straight to voicemail. Lately when Damon called it was important. She gave it a second after pressing the answer button, “Hello?”

Damon was in the car. She knew that much. A window was down and there was heavy breathing. “Y/N!” She knew the vampire was smiling. “How is my favorite…household?” Y/N wiped her forehead. What? “Uh look, you don’t have to answer that.” He was struggling. “Can uh…can you stop by my place? Say, ten minutes?”

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Let's get real for a second

Being a single mom is hard. Like really hard.

Everything is on me, from things as small as cooking dinner to things as big as potty training. Every single day, every single minute I hear the constant whines, cries, laughter, and “mommy’s” I don’t know what silence is. I don’t know what it means to sit down and watch a 30 minute TV episode.

My house often goes unclean. Sometimes we eat Easy Mac for dinner. I usually go 3 days between showers.

New clothes, the cost of daycare, anything from Tylenol to toys to diapers is all paid for by me.

And the kicker? Society looks at single moms like WE’RE the ones that failed, that we couldn’t keep our legs closed, or we did something to make our man run away. But what society doesn’t see is the millions of articles I read to be a better mom, the time I’m taking off work so I can be at my son’s school party, or that I’m stretching myself thin to give my son everything he wants.

Single moms are by far the strongest beings on this entire planet and I think we deserve a little more recognition than we receive.

The signs as things my aunt has said pt 2

Aries: Why do kids always get to eat first?! I’m hungrier!!

Taurus: *at a family function* I honestly only came here for the food and I’m truly disappointed with this potato salad. Should’ve never RSVP’d

Gemini: damn she transformed from a thotapillar to a hoetterfly…I’m proud

Cancer: I left AJ with Cocoa and now I need to go get him
AJ is her phone, Cocoa is her car….

Leo: “better call CHEVY with the FAKE hair” (Chevy is her ex boo’s new boo 🐸☕️)

Virgo: *when she was pregnant for her daughter*
aunt: yup, she’s going to be potty trained at 2, walking at 5, and she’ll have a steady paying job at 11.
me:…years?
aunt: no months

Libra: that cable guy outside looks like he could be my daughter’s new step daddy 😏

Scorpio:
aunt: let’s play a game: tell me a secret
me:…okay. You’re gonna tell me one too, right?
aunt: wow you just ruined all the fun. I don’t wanna play anymore

Sagittarius: *driving when a bicyclist comes in front of us*
aunt: *turns to smile at me in the passenger seat* how many points will I get if I hit him?

Capricorn: I may be a bitch, but I’m a classy bitch. I am the classiest bitch of all the classy bitches, therefore, I am the best bitch and that’s all the matters.

Aquarius:
aunt: I’ve cried one too many times this month
me: how many times have you cried?
aunt: once

Pisces:
TV: in the aaaarms ooof an angeeel
aunt: *holding on to my dog, sobbing*

I made myself mad.

Do you guys realize that they are gonna have such an issue with the amount of robins and/or batgirls one day, that it’s probably going to be cannon that Jason and Dick were Robin at the same time? Or Damian and Tim? Just so Bruce can stay under the age of 40?

One day Damian is gonna be like 19 and DC is gonna swear to us up and down that Bruce hasn’t even hit over the age of 30. All of us are looking at the rest of the family like “bro how are none of them aging?!” And it’s like “oh Tim is 20 though, he can almost drink "lol” and “Dick is in his mid 20’s oh no! Getting too old!!” And “But Jason is just 23” and “Bruce might be 28….and a half”

Worst case scenario, they are gonna introduce another Robin that gets super popular, and everyone is so excited about this one, but unfortunately for this one to stick around they reaaaaaaally need to get rid of the least popular one at the current time after that new one, (Jason or Tim?? Idk) or change up the background of that one “unpopular” Robin so completely, so that that character can still be around…they just aren’t affiliated with the batfamily as much anymore. (Like saying Jason was trained by someone else, etc., who knows man)

Or even weirder, they are gonna be like “oh well Damian came around at the age of 5, that’s when Bruce-man found out about him, he was still a little jackass that he had to train him out of, along with being re-potty trained because lord knows that change affects kids man.

That last one is a stretch, but I swear, even now at 4-6 robins DC is pushing it, and Batman is pushing it.

Stop adopting Batman.

When he gets home your child greets him naked (GOT7)

JB: -he would think it was cute when she came up to him. He would look down and see her little butt and start laughing- “why are you naked babe?”

Originally posted by mintokkies

Mark: -he wouldn’t even notice it right away until he moved closer. His sock soaked as he noticed the small puddle on the floor as she smiled up at him- “you’re supposed to be in a bath right? You can see me when you’re dry and dressed babygirl”

Originally posted by nochuie

Jackson: -he thought your son was in bed when he got home. When he was eating your son came out and patted Jackson’s leg with a messy head of hair excited to see his dad- “when did you start sleeping naked?”

Originally posted by j-miki

Jinyoung: -he would stand there for a moment as your son would continue playing while naked before speaking- “you’re not potty trained. Where’s your diaper?”

Originally posted by jypnior

Youngjae: -usually at bedtime your daughter would sleep in a diaper but she didn’t even have a diaper on when she got up to see him- “what did you do with your diaper?”

Originally posted by yjarssunshine

BamBam: -he would unlock the front door and step in. Then he would hear a hard slap on the gate put up so your son wouldn’t step out. He could see through the gate to see him there naked- “why are you naked boy? Where’s mommy?”

Originally posted by kunpimuak

Yugyeom: -he would go to the kitchen and after a few moments he would hear little feet and his small son came in butt naked. He would be confused but not really question it to much because it was the way your son was- “alright. I’m guessing you stripped”

Originally posted by markificent

3 weeks with Zoe..She Is 11 weeks old, 100% potty trained and 5 days without any accidents! She sits by the kitchen door to let us know she need to go out. Instead of going out ever 20 minutes we are up to 45 minutes to an hour. She is starting to lose her puppy fur along her back and physicality growing, her paws are the same size as Zak’s. She went for her first walk yesterday with Zak, she walked on the lead like she had been doing it for ages. Her favourite time of the day is supper time, she LOVES to eat, she sits in the kitchen and barks at me when I’m getting her food ready. And her favourite pastime is wrestling with Zak. She has chewed the hair off the end of his tail! She knows sit, stay, come, down and leave it..

©AmyJMontico 2017 .. All Rights Reserved   PLEASE LEAVE CREDITS

♡ Ethan as Dad of Twins

A/N: I did this as if they are identical twins! I did a line to separate twin boys and twin girls

Originally posted by dolantwinsgifs

Constantly confusing the twins for one or the other

Always insisting that Gray can babysit

Having to meet Gray at the hospital because he accidentally gave one of the boys a PB&J forgetting one was allergic to peanuts

Having to prevent Ethan from being over an overprotective dad and attacking Gray for sending one of your kids to the hospital

Always being the only woman in the house

Him potty training your sons

Best Mothers Day gifts

E helping his boys in sports

Showing them his game that won you over

You telling your boys “don’t listen to you dad. Buy her flowers and ask her out”

Him helping your sons pick out their tuxedos for prom

Him buying them their first playboy magazine

Him showing them how to put on a condom using a banana

Fixing their hair and straightening their ties for their wedding


Twin girls/Daughter

Him letting your twin girls sleep on his chest

Him nicknaming your girls “buttons” because they are as cute as a button

Wanting them to wear matching outfits

Him carrying them on his shoulders

Insisting on hanging their macaroni art all over the house

Him clutching the steering wheel as they tell him about their boyfriend from their kindergarten class

Him calling the school insisting to switch your daughters out of the class to keep them away from boys

Him having a talk with you when he notices that his little girls have boobs

Him having another talk with you when he was doing laundry and found some blood stained underwear

Him asking “what are your intentions with my daughter” during a family dinner with her boyfriend

Him trying to convince you to switch them into an all girl school

Him wrapping his jacket around his daughters during prom pictures

Him wanting to chaperone your daughters on their dates, but you convince him “they have to grow up sometime” so instead he just looks at their baby photos and remembers his little girls

Him trying not to cry at their weddings

Him being the greatest grandpa ever

daemongal  asked:

Hey there :) ive always loved shiba inus but was wondering how they are as pets. From bits of information i read it seems to suggest theyre prone to running away and jumping fences. Do you know if this is the case? Also do they have any breed specific care needs? Thank you!

Shiba Inus are adorable & weird. They don’t really get along with others, but if they do.. they have really strange social cues. They like to scream and it is funny at first, but after awhile it can be an issue. They have a high prey drive, so that might play into them having a tendency to escape. Shibas are often compared to cats; They like to clean themselves, are independent, and even can have a fondness for cats. They are easy to potty train, but pretty hard to train to do anything else. They can be prone to aggression and certainly not for a first time owner.

But let me tell you one of my best friends was a Shiba inu. She loved to play and cuddle. The only tough time we had was seriously her screaming that got out of control, and she certainly could never be a dog park dog. I knew her in a controlled environment, where I could match her up with dogs to play with. But these dogs can be a target for larger dogs with prey drive, especially when they decide to make their high pitch noises and show their teeth. They can get themselves into real trouble.

You must socialize them as a puppy. You have to start training early. But remember, breed specific traits can shine through regardless of training. 

Originally posted by sasaq

Don’t let anyone ever tell you that owning a pet isn’t like having kids! Why, with just one cat you can experience all ages of a child at once!

Baby:
-don’t speak or understand english
-cry a lot
-wake you up in the middle of the night
-beg for food all the time (this is like all ages, actually)

Toddler:
-like to be picked up and sit in your lap
-need to be potty trained, unless you adopt an older one
-play with their food

Young kid:
-toys all over the house
-like playing in boxes and laundry baskets
-fight with their siblings

Teenager:
-ignore you when you talk to them
-won’t come when you call
-disappear somewhere into the bedroom for hours at a time
-up all night doing who knows what

One Year

Synopsis: After Yoongi suffers a tragic death, he watches how his loved ones suffer because of his absence. He makes a deal with Death himself; he has one year to prepare his beloved ones for his inevitable death. 

Words: 5,296

Originally posted by ohbaibeeitsyou

- January 20th 10:35 p.m-

Yoongi doesn’t look at you, all he does is tighten his grip around the steering wheel and step on the gas petal. Instinctively, your hands grab onto the side of your seat, bracing yourself for the violent brakes and sudden accelerations of the car. You don’t understand why he’s driving so fast considering he knows how much you dislike it. After the car accident when you were a teenager involving all of your family you had grown traumatized of being in cars. Before today he would be considerate about that fear and would refrain from even going five miles over the designated speed limit. Today was a different story. 

“Slow down,” you do a horrible job of hiding the fear laced in your voice. Through the corner of your eye, you see Yoongi inhaling and exhaling violently. The vein of the side of his neck is pulsing, beneath the thin level of skin you can see the muscles in his jaw flex as he continues to grind his teeth. 

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