post privacy

The Zodiac Signs and Keeping (Others’) Secrets

Takes it to the grave: Aquarius, Capricorn, Scorpio, Sagittarius

Tells their cat/an inanimate object: Libra, Pisces, Aries

Tells one trusted friend: Virgo, Cancer, Leo, Taurus

Tells everyone: Gemini

anonymous asked:

i know you meant well when you said 30 isnt ancient, but im nb so my life expectancy is actually 30 :(

Hey anon, I’m so sorry that that’s a fear you’ve had to live with. I know that trans people are at greater risk of violence and suicide, and I’ve heard people say many times that the life expectancy of trans people (or trans women, or trans women of color, depending on who you ask) is anywhere from 23 to 35. Your ask troubled me, so I’ve dug deep looking for solid evidence of any of these, and I don’t believe that these statistics are true.

A trans woman, Helen, looked into the “23 years” claim and traced it back to someone’s notes on two workshops at a 2007 conference, which stated that trans people’s life expectancy is “believed to be around 23” (emphasis mine) but cites no actual source. This claim has been presented as fact in many news articles since then, but as far as I can tell, no one seems to know where this figure came from.

Another claim is often sourced to an Argentine psychologist quoted in this NPR article

Psychologist Graciela Balestra, who works closely with the transgender community, says it’s an especially vulnerable population.

“Transgender people have an average life expectancy of about 30 to 32 years,” Balestra says. “They don’t live any longer; I think that statistic alone says so much.”

But again, the article gives no source for this figure

I found an article claiming that a 2014 report by the Inter-American Commission on Human Rights (IACHR) “concludes the average life expectancy of trans people in the Western Hemisphere is between 30-35 years.” However, when I tracked down the report, An Overview of Violence Against LGBTI Persons (pdf), its only reference to this is (emphasis mine): “[T]he IACHR has received information that the life expectancy of trans women in the Americas is between 30 and 35 years of age.” Again, this is no source.

Someone said on my post that these statistics may have come from the NCTE/NGLTF report Injustice at Every Turn (pdf), but I can’t find any reference to any such claim in the report.

Thinking about these claims, they seem unlikely for some basic reasons. Consider that we simply don’t have a long enough span of data on trans people, and that what data we do have is extremely limited because we can’t always know who is trans and who isn’t. Consider also that, although obviously the murder rates for trans people are extremely high, the number of deaths of 20-something trans people would have to be ENORMOUS to offset the existence of older trans people and bring the average down to 30. Especially since, unlike with racial groups for example, the data on trans people would likely include almost no childhood deaths, simply because it would be much more difficult (and in many cases impossible) to identify these children as trans. And since we know that trans women of color are extremely disproportionately affected by violence, statistics that include white people and/or trans men would be especially unlikely to be so low.

And as to your specific situation anon, again given that trans women of color are most at risk, I don’t think we have reason to believe that being non-binary specifically puts a person at anywhere near this level of increased risk of dying young.

I don’t say any of this to question anyone’s experiences or to deny the state of emergency that trans women face with regard to violence. That is very real. But I think it can be harmful, even dangerous to trans people to spread claims like this around, especially without evidence. Expecting to die by 30 would take an extreme emotional toll on anyone, and trans people deserve better.

But don’t take my word for it: FORGE, a national transgender anti-violence organization that works with trans survivors of sexual assault, wrote the following in its 2016 publication “First Do No Harm: 8 Tips for Addressing Violence Against Transgender and Gender Non-Binary People” (pdf) (I have moved two footnotes into the main text and provided links to some endnote sources; italicized emphasis is theirs while bold is mine.): 

Promote Hope for the Future

It certainly is not the same as a murder, but publicizing a low “life expectancy” rate for transwomen of color is another way to steal away their future, a “crime” that has been committed repeatedly by trans, LGBQ, and mainstream press. Think about the people you know or have heard of who have been diagnosed with a fatal illness and given a short time to live: how many of them have enrolled in college, undertaken lengthy training for a new occupation, had a new child, or tried to establish a new non-profit? A few do, certainly, but many more focus on their bucket list, arrange for their good-byes, or simply give up entirely, essentially relinquishing whatever time they have left to depression and regrets. When we tell transwomen of color they cannot expect to live very long, we rob them of hope. We rob them of any motivation to invest in themselves, their relationships, and their communities. We rob them, in short, of their lives even while they are still living. (This statement in no way negates the need to systemically work to improve and increase the life expectancy of trans people through working to end transphobia, racism, poverty, pervasive violence, and health and healthcare inequities, and more.)

One trans woman of color was trying to come to grips with an estimated lifespan figure more than ten years shorter than the one that has been published most often. (We are not repeating any of the (incorrect) estimated lifetime figures that are circulating, to avoid even inadvertent reinforcement.) Faced with the report of yet another attack on another trans woman, she wrote:

These days, I look at the latest reports of stabbed, shot, beaten trans women, search myself for tears, and I cannot find a thing. I want to mourn and rage. I want to honor all of our sisters — the hundreds each year who are ripped, namelessly and without fanfare, from this life — who are taken so young before their time. But the grief and anger — even empathy — do not come. I don’t feel anything but numbness and fatigue, and somewhere far below that, fear.

The terrible irony of the life expectancy “fact” is that it is based on an impossibility. The only ways to determine a given population’s life expectancy are to: examine decades or more of death certificates or census data containing the information being studied, or follow a specific set of individuals for around 100 years and record every single death. There is not and never has been a census of transgender people. Our death certificates do not mark us as transgender. There has been no 100-year-long study of a representative group of trans people. So where are the estimated lifespan figures coming from?

FORGE tracked the most commonly-cited figure back to what was most likely the 2014 Philadelphia Transgender Health Conference, where a workshop presenter gave the figure and explained she had calculated it by averaging the age of death for all of those listed on the Transgender Day of Remembrance (TDOR) website. This means the figure is actually the average age of those trans people who were both murdered and came to the attention of someone who added them to the TDOR list. Interestingly, this average is very close to the average age of everyone who is murdered in the U.S., according to the U.S. Department of Justice statistics. [I’m not seeing an average age given in the cited source but you can see on page 5 of this Bureau of Justice Statistics report (pdf) that the average age of homicide victims in the U.S. was between 30 and 35 from 1980 to 2008.]

But not everyone is murdered.

Despite how many there may appear to be, only a tiny, tiny fraction of transpeople are killed by other people. Most of us, transwomen of color included, live average lifespans and die of the most common U.S. killers — heart disease, cancer, chronic lower respiratory disease, and unintentional injuries (accidents).

Please don’t add to fear and hopelessness by spreading inaccurate and profoundly disempowering data.

Since I can’t respond to everyone directly, I’m @ing some people who’ve brought this up on my post and may be interested: (urls removed after posting for their privacy). I appreciate your thoughtfulness in bringing this to my attention. If you or anyone else has a source on any of these figures that can provide specific methodology, I’d be very grateful to see that.

In closing, here are some resources that provide a more hopeful view of trans aging. They are well known but I hope they will be helpful to someone.

This is sketchy as hell.

For people who see this post… why? Why would anyone like this?
This is a weird invasion of childhood moments that weren’t released by choice.

You don’t just get someone’s yearbook. 
You either go to the school those years, or you hunt this down from someone else that has one.

Everyone wants to know whatever they can about Ryan’s past, but can we at least let him decide when he releases or okays pictures from his own childhood?
It’s exciting and fun to know more about someone!
This is not one of those times.

Leaving out the name of the school makes no difference.
It’s still creepy and weird.

“For the sake of his privacy”
If there was any care at all for his privacy this wouldn’t have been posted.
Especially not on a side account with no other posts than to reblog this same thing.

I blacked out the name just for the fact that they shouldn’t get more named recognition for this kind of negative digging.

If people out there care for Ryan’s actual privacy and life, please…
Give this post no notice when you go by it.
Don’t encourage this kind of hunting stalking behavior.

Ryan should mean more to this to any true fan who cares deeply for his well being and privacy of his life.
If he wanted it released, it’d be out on an Extra Life or a stream.


Just here to remind you all that secretly taking pictures of Dan and Phil, or anyone considered well known, and then posting said pictures on social media is an invasion of their privacy. You also cannot justify it by their fame and yes you still need to consider that they are human and they have privacy rights as we all do. To anyone else, please don’t support these pictures as that only motivates and encourages people to take them in the first place. I know you don’t mean any harm, but it just isn’t right. 

Alright everyone. It’s time for a talk.
Please stop writing or drawing about Phichit invading Viktor and Yuuri’s privacy and posting it online. That’s not okay, and Phichit would never do that.
Don’t write or draw about Phichit giving up his place on the podium just so Viktor and Yuuri can get married. He is dedicated to his sport; unless it were a life or death situation, he would never sacrifice his whole career.
Don’t write or draw Phichit and reduce him to nothing but a media/IG addicted best friend. He is so much more than that. Yes, he loves sharing things online, but that’s not all there is to his character.
Phichit is making history and achieving his dreams, not sitting in the background doing nothing but posting on IG. Stop characterizing him to be what he’s not.
You’ve been given a wonderful character with Phichit Chulanont. Don’t let that go to waste.

Chris Evans Privacy

Chris is very protective of his privacy and I respect that. He has every right to be. So that’s why - on my blogs - I won’t address any gossips, dating rumors and everything concerning his personal life he or his family don’t share with us.

I’m neither his mother, his wife nor his friend. I’m a fan and as a fan, I love his work because, in my opinion, he’s such a great actor and a precious human being. So as such, I’m nobody to judge him and what he does in his private life, it’s called PRIVATE for a simple reason. I’m here to show my support and show my love for his acting skills and his personality. Nothing else.

I won’t express a comment about who he’s dating, who are his friends, and his family. That’s HIS OWN bubble of freedom in Hollywood. No judgment allowed on this blog. I simply hate this when people think they can express their bad opinions on someone just because she/he is famous. That’s not fair and not healthy for anyone.

What would you feel if people you don’t even know start talking about you and most of the time say things they don’t even know about you? What would you feel if they start making up crazy theories about every single one of your movement? You would feel hurt and bullied? Well, you’re right. That’s what this is about. Being famous doesn’t mean losing feelings or humanity.

That’s bully. And I can’t stand bullies.



tagged by super pretty ladies @meiqie @shinspirit @ho-seok !!! + anon who wanted it 2

sorry it’s horizontal & obnoxious but i tag anyone!! tag me in ur selfies anytime pls

signal boost this please!

important if you have ANYONE who tracks your whereabouts!!!

to all my iphone users, i found out that one of my mom’s coworkers use the built-in Find Friends app to keep track of where her daughter is at all times. obviously this is a huge invasion of privacy and borderline scary. however with apple’s recent update to iOS 10, you can delete the app. so if you and/or your parents (or even if you are in an abusive situation) have an iphone please delete that app asap.

My musings on Sam and Cait and shipping and other people and things.

Somehow anons find the “Georgia incident” an opportunity to vent in my ask box about Sam and Cait and I feel the need to say something about that.

No, I don’t either hate nor Sam. And I won’t post or read anything hateful about them. I really, really like them. I think they’re both adorable, sweet, generous and kind people.

I also think they’re behaving not very wisely all the time and right now I roll my eyes at them. 

That is not hate. I’m jus a bit annoyed about their dishonesty and aobut their selfish behavior towards two other people. And before the next anon comes to my ask to tell me “they don’t owe you anyhting”. No, they don’t. But I don’t either. I can criticize them as much as I feel inclined to. If I see someone behave stupidly or badly, I can say so. That might not change their behavior, but it makes me feel better to have said what I think.

I’m convinced that Sam is in a relationship with Mackenzie and that Cait is in a relationship with Tony. So far so good. What I don’t understand is their disrespectful behavior towards their partners. And I’m NOT talking about being so affectionate with each other. That’s IMO just how they are. They really like each other very much, they have a lot of sexual chemistry and they both like to flirt. They’re actors and actors are different from other people. They have less boundaries. I fully understand it, because I’m an opera singer and I’ve seen it in theatre all the time. What is “normal” for other people doesn’t apply for actors.

So, I’m absolutely fine with how Sam and Cait are with each other. In fact I love it, I’m grateful that we’re blessed with a couple of leads, who are so incredibly close to each other. That’s rare and a blessing for the show. And I love to watch it, it warms my heart, it genuinely touches me and no, I don’t think it is for business or “acted”. These two adore the hell out of each other and when in each other’s company they glow from within.

That doesn’t mean they have to be in a romantic relationship though. Sad but true. Whatever their reasons, they’re obviously not. They have said so and they clearly have other partners in their life. It’s just idiotic to search for reasons why Sam should be in Columbus, Georgia on the day of Mackenzie’s brother’s wedding. There is no other reason, it is the writing on the wall and it is time for me to admit to it.

BUT why Sam thinks it is OK to throw his girlfriend under the bus again and again is beyond me. Why he thinks any woman should be treated as a dirty, little secret, not worth being even in a picture with him once is a miracle to me. Shoved aside at the Scottish BAFTA, treated as if she was someone to be ashamed about. At the same time he treats Cait as a queen, builds a shrine on his IG and allows the ugly side of the fandom to be all over Mackenzie. Is it surprising,  that she gets treated as if she was worthless when he himself sets the example? Yes, he stood up once when it got really out of hand, but how about saying: “This woman means something to me. She’s my girlfriend, stay away from her.”? That is too much loss of privacy? But posting a picture of Georgia or of North Carolina to show he’s in her vicinity isn’t?

Same goes for Cait. She’s said to be with Tony for three years. How can she be so disrespectful and dragg him all over the world and then treat him like a part of the furniture. Not worthy to be in pictures with her, not worthy to be introduced as her partner. Allowing the discussion about him being her PA going on. What does that say about her self image? What does it say about Tony? She allows the world to see him as a complete doormat instead of someone she is proud to have at her side.

This is what I criticize. And before someone says it: No, I don’t think Sam and Cait realize, that it is what they’re doing. I think they’re kindhearted and nice and they would not intentionally hurt people they love. I do  think they’re both very new to fame though and trying to be as fiercely protective of their privacy as they can. Maybe they even talked about how they would achieve that and made a plan. But the plan is bad. They’re making a huge mistake here and I wish someone would take them by the hand and tell them, that instead of protecting their privacy, they’re behaving like assholes.

Protecting their privacy is actually very easy. Million stars have done it before and are doing it now. It doesn’t mean you have to announce your first date with someone and then display your affection on SM. After three years and almost one year though, it should at least be official. Tell the world the name of your SO and then refuse to talk about it. Easy and has been done a zillion times before. Does Merly Streep talk about her her private life? No. But do we know her husband? Of course we do, he’s not hidden away. Is David Berry living his private life on SM when he posts a pic of him and his wife from time to time? Or of him and his son? No, he isn’t. But he is proud of his family and says so. That’s how you do it. Sam and Cait should take a look and do the same.

anonymous asked:

briana “im an innocent mother who wants privacy” jungwirth posts a picture of her ‘child’ and tags a kid’s clothing company who’s instagram is comprised of reposted pictures of children wearing their clothing, but yeah so private

Can people like…stop posting those stalker photos of Sehun swimming at the hotel in Myanmar…especially when it’s for the sake of gaining notes and followers…Yeah they’re posted all over social media already but you could really help by not sharing them anymore? Taking photos of the boys relaxing outside of their schedules without their knowledge is really disrespectful ://