possibly one of my favourite lines from the whole thing

anonymous asked:

Sorry to spring theories on you so hot on the heels of the eps (I keep doing that, haha) but here we go, 2x18. Is it just me or did we see the return of performance-Dean? I had a theory. We see he's worried about Cas. Sam reminds him that Cas leaves often. That's not what Dean wants to hear - so soon after giving Cas a home. Then the sheriff talks about how people "skip town" and next we know Dean is chatting up the waitress and talking about burgers. Is Dean afraid Cas has abandoned him again?

Hey, firstly don’t apologise for that! I should be apologising for not being around much nowadays and being rather flippant with my ask answering!

Your theory is pretty much the one on my mind when I watched the episode and I have seen a few posts going around mentioning the same thing as well. This episode started with Dean in classic worry mode over Cas’s absence and complete lack of communication. We are told that he is keeping an eye out for any signs of him including him turning up dead. The fact that we get this bit of information is how this exchange differs from previous Cas mentions. Dean is actively looking for him and worrying enough to check police reports and stuff for a body. Dean is so past “Cas will be fine, he always is” even though Sam is still repeating that old mantra. 

Once again we have this pattern of Dean being worried about Cas and Sam reassuring him as best he can. Once again we are reminded that the brothers have very different emotional ties to Cas. But when Dean gets to the point where he struggles to cope with his feelings what does he do? What he always does. Buries the emotion down deep, puts on his mask and throws himself into meaningless decadence. 

The fact that the Sheriff just brushed off the disappearances as people getting bored and skipping town was another clue along with the “lost dog” poster about just how much of a gap Cas is making in Dean’s life. I think you have made a good point in highlighting it because the Sheriffs attitude mirrors Sam’s at the start of the ep about Cas. Of course all this makes me worry that just like the two victims of the monster of the week, Cas is so not fine. He is in trouble, and next episode will probably be emotional. Dean clearly didn’t believe Sam’s line about Cas, and he doesn’t believe the sheriff either. Could it have been another reason to encourage him to hit on the waitress? Possibly. Its just more and more elements making him think about Cas, worry, and then continue the cycle of burying his emotions and putting on his performance.

Honestly my favourite moment for its symbolism to the whole thing was the egg white omelette. I know that we get teased for our food meta but this one stood out like a neon light. Dean talks about wanting pancakes, but what he gets is a tasteless egg white omelette stolen from Sam. Does he enjoy it? Nope. Does it satisfy him? Nope. Does he have it anyway? Yeah. Why? Because he needed sustenance even if it was not enjoyable. Just like how he needed some mindless gratification even if it meant nothing to him. Its not like the episode ended with him riding off into the sunset with the waitress on his lap now is it? He ditched her like he ditches every other one night stand. Because it is all just part of his performance.

Don’t even get me started on how the waitress was basically a spitting image of Young Mary… We’ve been down this road before far too many times. What Dean needs and what he acts like he needs are two very different things.

anonymous asked:

what are your favourite kabby moments and why?

Thank you nonnie, well, I’ve been going through another aggressive Kabby cycle of late so you either have very good timing or very bad, I’m not entirely sure which. You also didn’t specify a number of scenes…Which may have been a very bad thing as well because I’m unlikely ever to shut up…But I think you all expect this of me now anyway so without further ado:

1)- 1x05 ‘Thank You’ or that moment where Marcus isn’t as much of a dick as we first thought (and also look at the way he looks at her)

This one is actually quite early on (shipping from the start people) but I think it’s really important for both Kabby and Marcus as well because it’s that sort of, it’s not that he doesn’t want her play with Raven to fail out of spite and he definitely doesn’t want to proceed with this culling; he does want her plan to work, he wants Earth to be survivable, he wants that option and he’s taken steps to ensure that, if by some miracle it does work, he’s got people to report to him the second she gets through so they can stop this.

And I think this is a really big moment for Marcus in season 1, for the audience as well because it’s hard to get out of the knowledge that you have. You know as an audience that the ground is survivable, you know that Raven made it, you know that Abby’s right and Marcus is wrong which makes what he’s doing seriously hard to swallow but from his point of view he doesn’t know that. Abby is very much best case hope and Marcus is very much worst case planning here; he’s not a lunatic on a power trip, he’s just trying to do the best that he can for his people.

And I think that very genuine little ‘thank you’ that she gives him (and the way that she looks at him, mustn’t forget that, never going to be over that) is her sort of realising that fact at the same point we do and looking at him a little bit differently and I think it’s just really nice to see that these two, who are so often at loggerheads, so often opposed and arguing and fighting because they have such different viewpoints and ideals on how to get things done, are literally standing side-by-side in this scene and  I think it just really reinforces that they do have this common ground; they both want the same thing. He’s not bad and she’s not good so to speak, they just have different ways of going about things, but they’re united by this common goal and that becomes a really strong tie for them in later seasons so I enjoy this foundation work.

2)- I don’t care if the world is literally crumbling around my ears I am going to crawl through this tiny cramped little tunnel and save your stupid self Take 1 Marcus edition 1x11

Also known as that one scene that catapulted me from hmm, I like this, to otp fuck me and send help.

There are many things that I enjoy in this world, I am a person with simple pleasures, tea, a good book, a big slab of chocolate, and the smile that lights up Marcus Kane’s face when he holds Abby Griffin in his arms in that one scene in 1x11 and realises that she’s not dead. I don’t know if it was scripted for him to look like he’d just seen the damn sun after ten years encased underground or if it was an acting choice by Ian (goddammit Ian) but whatever it was, it delighted the life out of me so here we are.  

The physical contact in that scene is also really interesting as well, I think pretty much from the moment that his torch lights upon her and he runs to her and turns her over to wake her up, there really isn’t a moment at all where he’s not touching her in some way, either cupping her cheeks in his hands or helping guiding her down towards him or just flat out snuggling (I love that, I really do, the world is falling apart around them but we must take time out for Abby recovery cuddles, it’s wonderful) and I just really love the way she just slumps down with her head on his chest and it’s just a real sense of safety that she gets from him, he’s found her, he’s there with her, everything’s going to be alright now and she knows that there with him and it just, yeah there’s a lot there, it’s a fairly small little beat but damn if it didn’t ruin my life and make me into what I am today.

3)- ‘There has to be another way’ Take 1 - 1x13 

There is /so much/ to unpack in this scene and so much that I love about it and you know, you’re never getting an abridged version of anything with me so on we go.

The possessive little arm seatbelt of hers just ruins me okay, it really ruins me, just, he hasn’t even managed to untangle himself or stand up yet but she already knows exactly what he’s thinking and she also already knows that it’s not something she’s just willing to sit back and meekly watch happen and so the arm comes out and he gets glowered at and yes Marcus but what exactly do you think that you’re doing here? Because it’s not happening.

And I think that one of the more interesting things about this is that she never actually takes her hand away? If you watch that scene, all the way through his line about someone having to stay behind and all through her next line she shoots at Sinclair, the arm stays very, very firmly in place, reaching across his body and trying to keep him there and stop him rising. The only time that she actually takes it away is when he makes her? It’s hard to see (dammit) but I think it’s pretty obvious that just before his ‘salvation comes at a price’ line you can see him curl his fingers around the hand that’s still outstretched to him and just sort of, it’s a very nice physical way of telling her to let go of this, she can’t win every fight, there isn’t always another way, sometimes someone has to sacrifice themselves/suffer so that everyone else can get what they need.

Then we come to that little line that ‘there has to be another way’ which is just, incredibly important in this scene and spoken by Abby. It’s been her mantra the whole season, wanting to find another way around the culling, she has half a hundred suggestions at one point, she’s desperate for them to give the 100 more time to make contact and stop them going through with this and it’s a sentiment that carries into the next season but most interestingly it’s Marcus who really carries it through. That little beat in 2x03 with the grounder ‘there’s got to be a better way’ definitely echoes her and he repeats those very words of hers in the season 2 finale (but I’ll sob more about this later I just want to draw attention to another point of this meta to come, namely parallels between these two)

But yes, the point there was that this has been Abby’s mantra all season; but a lot of the time it’s been directed /against/ him. He has been the one she has been saying find another way to, but now they’ve come to the point that he wants to sacrifice himself but she’s saying this for him now, to try and save him. And this time, he’s right, someone does have to stay behind, and he’s decided that it has to be him and just, there isn’t another line of dialogue exchanged between them in that scene after that and the silent communication that we get between the two of them is amazing.

Her desperate, pleading look towards him just before he stands up and his half-placating, half-insistent and impatient look back as she silently says don’t do this, don’t leave him, and him just, this is his choice, he has to do this and god her face when he stands up and makes it absolutely clear that he’s going through with it is soul destroying.

And then, to cap it all, we have the final nail in the coffin of every Kabby shipper barely keeping it together and the hand hoooolding which is just, okay who decided this was an okay thing to do to me I mean really. But I think there’s a lot of symbolism in that, I think it’s both, something of a resolution for their earlier arc, a certain coming together (made more poignant when they become the first two to step out onto the ground together and an idea of coming at this a little more united than they were before) but I think it’s also a lot about acceptance? She’s accepting his choice here, his decision, she doesn’t want him to do this, in fact she’s jus actively tried to prevent him from doing so, but he has to.

And there’s a certain feeling of their earlier arcs all wrapped up in this because he wants to make the sacrifice play, a clear echo to the culling, put the needs of the many before the needs of the few (in this case himself) and she wants to find another way, a way that they can all survive, a way that they can all get through this but someone has to stay behind. He listened to her, he waited to see if Sinclair could give them other options this time, but there weren’t any, so he went on ahead with this and I think that hand holding is a nicely little way of binding up their arc and yes, they have their differences, but I think there is that sense that they can come together, they can work together, they can present a united front, and ironic as it is when he’s about to stay behind, it’s the idea that they can get through this together, with a little bit of both of their mentalities and just, I don’t know, I’ve gone on too long about this already.

(much) more under the cut! 

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