eating isn’t shameful. you aren’t ugly just because you’ve gained weight. calories are necessary. treating yourself is okay. please take care of yourself. your body loves you and depends on you to help it function properly.
believe people when they show you their true colors. if they treat you like trash, it’s because they think you deserve that or because they know you’ll put up with it. you don’t and you don’t have to. stop making excuses for them. stop excusing their shitty behavior. they aren’t worth hours of mental gymnastics. a good person would treat you decently. it really is that simple. i promise.
if they loved you, they would change their hurtful, bad behavior the first time you asked. if they didn’t, they’re going to keep doing it and keep taking advantage of the fact that you believe they will. they’re using your feelings to their advantage, which is toxic and manipulative. the best apology is changed behavior, and if they aren’t willing to give that to you, you should probably let them go.